There’s a fine line between genuinely being okay and just putting on a brave face.
Women, in particular, can be masters of the art of pretending everything’s fine when it really isn’t. They’ve honed this skill over time, often as a way to protect themselves and those around them.
These women tend to exhibit certain behaviors that make their facade convincing. Once you know what these are, you might just be able to see through their act.
So here we are, about to dive into the 8 common behaviors displayed by women who’ve perfected the craft of pretending they’re okay when they’re not.
1) They’re always smiling
One of the most common behaviors of women who are adept at pretending they’re okay is that they’re always smiling.
A constant smile is often a mask, a facade they use to hide their true feelings. It’s a disguise that’s meant to reassure those around them – and sometimes, themselves – that everything is fine.
But behind the smile, there’s often a storm of emotions. Whether it’s stress, sadness, or frustration, these women have mastered the art of concealing their feelings behind a smile.
It’s important to remember that not every smile is genuine. Sometimes, it’s just a well-practiced performance by someone who’s learned to hide their pain.
So next time you see a woman who seems to be constantly cheerful, take a moment to look closer. There might be more going on beneath the surface than you realize.
2) They’re always there for others
Another behavior that women who have mastered the art of pretending they’re okay exhibit is always being there for others. It’s almost as if their own struggles take a backseat to the needs of those around them.
Speaking from personal experience, I remember a time when I was going through some tough times at work. My boss was particularly demanding, and the stress was starting to take a toll on me. But instead of sharing my problems, I found myself constantly offering a listening ear to my friends and colleagues.
The more I focused on their issues, the less I had to deal with mine – or at least, that’s what I thought. It was my way of escaping from my own problems by immersing myself in theirs.
It was only when a close friend pointed out this pattern that I realized what I was doing. She told me it was okay not to be okay and encouraged me to share my struggles instead of always trying to carry everyone else’s.
So if you notice a woman who’s always there for others, even when she’s going through her own challenges, understand that it might be her way of masking her struggles. Be patient with her and encourage her to share her feelings too.
3) They’re constantly busy
Women who have mastered the art of pretending they’re okay usually have a packed schedule. They are constantly on the move, filling their days with tasks and errands.
Behind this perpetual motion is a clever distraction technique. By keeping themselves occupied, they prevent their minds from dwelling on their personal problems. It’s an effective way of avoiding emotions they’d rather not face.
Interestingly, a study found that staying busy can actually help to reduce negative emotions and improve mental health. However, it also warned that using busyness as an avoidance strategy could lead to more significant issues in the long run.
Therefore, if a woman seems to be always on the go with hardly any time for herself, it might be worth gently probing deeper to see if there’s more to her busyness than meets the eye.
4) They’re experts at changing the subject
Another common trait of women who are skilled at pretending they’re okay is their ability to steer conversations away from themselves. They are experts at changing the subject when it gets too personal or threatens to expose their vulnerabilities.
This is a subtle tactic that often goes unnoticed. By shifting the focus onto others, they manage to keep their own struggles under wraps. It’s not that they don’t want to share, but more often than not, they fear being a burden or bringing others down with their problems.
So, if you notice a woman who frequently diverts the conversation away from herself, especially when the topic gets personal, it might be a sign that she’s not as okay as she’s letting on. Giving her a safe and non-judgmental space to express herself could be a big step in helping her open up about her struggles.
5) They put on a brave face during tough times
Some women, in their quest to appear okay, become experts at putting on a brave face during tough times. They’ll stand tall in the face of adversity and comfort others, even when they themselves are hurting.
This act of courage can be both inspiring and heartbreaking. It’s inspiring because it speaks to the strength and resilience of these women. It’s heartbreaking because beneath that brave exterior, they may be silently wrestling with their own pain.
If you encounter a woman who always seems to stay strong, even in the hardest moments, remember that she might be carrying a heavy burden. A simple act of kindness or a sincere word of encouragement can go a long way in helping her feel seen and supported.
6) They’re perfectionists
Perfectionism is another common behavior among women who are good at pretending they’re okay. They’ll strive for excellence in every aspect of their lives, whether it’s work, parenting, or even their appearance.
I’ve found myself falling into this trap from time to time. Striving to maintain a perfect image or accomplish tasks flawlessly seemed like a way to keep the chaos of my personal struggles at bay. It felt as if, by controlling the things I could, I was somehow managing the things I couldn’t.
But perfectionism can be exhausting and unsustainable. If you notice a woman who seems to be putting undue pressure on herself to be perfect, it might be an indication that she’s dealing with deeper issues she’s not ready to confront. Being there for her, reminding her that it’s okay to be imperfect, can make a world of difference.
7) They’re good at laughing off their problems
A common characteristic of women who are adept at pretending they’re okay is their ability to laugh off their problems. They’ll make light of their struggles or use humor as a deflection tactic.
This is often a defense mechanism, a way to keep people from probing deeper into their lives. By laughing off their issues, they give the impression that everything’s fine, even when it’s not.
But laughter can also be a cry for help, a subtle signal that they’re dealing with something difficult. If you notice a woman who frequently uses humor to brush off serious matters, it might be worth checking in on her to see if she needs someone to talk to. Offering a listening ear can provide the support she needs but might not be asking for.
8) They rarely ask for help
Perhaps the most telling sign of women who’ve mastered the art of pretending they’re okay is that they rarely ask for help. Even in situations where they clearly need assistance, they’ll insist on handling things on their own.
This behavior stems from a fear of appearing weak or being a burden to others. It’s a silent plea for understanding and support, disguised under a veil of self-sufficiency.
Being aware of this can make a huge difference. Sometimes, offering help without being asked can provide much-needed relief. It’s a gesture that says, “I see you, I’m here for you, and it’s okay not to be okay.”