If the guy you love has left you then there you’re likely feeling disappointed, frustrated, and even hopeless.
You’re also probably wondering: is there a chance he’ll come back?
Does he still love you and think of you every night or is he out partying it up and meeting a new love of his life? It can feel like you’re looking in a one-way mirror with no answers coming up and a long road of heartbreak stretching ahead.
Perhaps you feel a lack of confidence in whether he’ll come back or whether he still has feelings for you. Have too many bridges been burned or is there still a chance at salvaging what you once had?
There are a number of signs that can tell you if he’s going to be back someday or whether you need to mourn your busted up the heart and find a way to fully move on.
First, there are three fundamentals you need to embrace if you’ve been left by a guy you still love.
1) Know your own worth
Not to get too corny, but if you don’t believe in and love yourself, who will? And even if they do, how will it get through the layers of negativity and self-doubt?
It’s vital that you know your own worth and not chase this guy who’s let you down. He may see you as a bitch for not falling all over to get him back, but you need to maintain self-respect at all costs.
If he said he wants to leave then so be it. You need confidence that he’ll be back. Feel it deep in your bones and know that you’re worth it.
Think of all the amazing things you did for him in your relationship and how many other guys want to get your attention: yet this genius is done with the whole production? Fine.
Be confident of your own worth and feel assured that in time, if he still loves you and realizes what he lost, he will be back.
2) Rediscover yourself
To truly know your own worth and value yourself, you’ve got to know who you really are. Be in touch with your emotions. Learn about yourself and what makes you tick.
By rediscovering yourself, you can find a type of strength and power within you that you never knew existed.
So, while you wait to see if he comes back, why not take that time to journey within and create an epic relationship with yourself?
That way, regardless of the outcome, you’ll have a great grounding and sense of self, one that can flourish whether you’re single or in a relationship.
There was a time I also felt disconnected from myself after an awful breakup, but I found a unique way to overcome it:
A rejuvenating free breathwork video, created by Brazillian shaman, Rudá Iandê.
Combining breathwork with his shamanic knowledge, these exercises are aimed at restoring emotional balance and dissolving anxiety, but most importantly, at reconnecting with yourself.
Each time I do the exercises, I’m reminded of how much potential and love for life I have hidden inside – something we all need reminding of from time to time.
Because the truth is, until you repair the relationship you have with yourself, you’ll struggle to form healthy relationships with others.
And since you don’t know what will happen in the future, your best bet is to invest in yourself with self-care and let the rest fall into place naturally.
3. Let him go – for now
This means the “no contact” rule or at least very limited contact. It might seem harsh – and even contradictory – but the only way you’re going to get him back is by accepting that there is a very real chance he never will come back.
Accept this by embracing no contact. It can take a long time to heal, and you may worry that your ex will bounce back after your relationship and quickly find someone new.
But you can’t let this fear and this inner sense of risk change your dedication to moving on from him – for now.
A common mistake that women make when their man has left them is to be impatient and hang on every text.
Even if he dates some glamorous girls with lots of followers on Instagram, eventually he’s going to think back to what you two had and – if it was truly something special and real – he’s going to think of you and consider coming back. If there’s still that deep inner part of him that wants to be your protector and hero it’s going to flare up and come back once he’s away from you for a while.
But that won’t happen if you keep reminding him of the breakup, discussing it, or pushing to get him back. Wait for the time to be right and him to really state his clear intention to get back together and don’t take anything less or let him jerk you around or play mind games.
It will happen – if it does happen – in its own sweet time.
Your ex will also definitely notice that you’re not reliant on him coming back and that independence and confidence will be highly attractive to him.
Now that those fundamentals have been discussed it’s time to cut to the chase: 12 signs that he’s going to come back and wants to get back together.
QUIZ: “Does my ex want me back?” If you still love your ex, then you’re probably asking yourself this question. I’ve put together a fun science-based quiz to help you figure it out. Take my quiz here.
12 obvious signs he’s going to come back
1) He’s still in love
If your ex told you he’s still in love with you when you broke up then you hold the ace card.
Maybe the breakup was over distance, diverging life plans, a strong disagreement over values, or cheating. But if he said he loves you then you know that there’s a good chance he’s eventually going to be back.
Believe it or not, men aren’t all logic or sex, and they do have strong emotions. If he loves you then he’s not going to slam the door and forget all about you.
He’s going to think of you all the time, and his heart is going to hurt.
Wait for him to realize the mistake he’s made and come back. Love’s not easy to find.
2) He tries to make contact
You’re not answering until he stops playing games and directly tells you he wants to get back together because you’re sticking to no contact.
Even if he does ask you out and you go out, keep it cool.
This guy who broke your heart can’t play you like a violin, he needs to earn back your trust and love.
Remember that if he truly loves you and he’s truly worth your time you’re not going to be disposable or replaceable to him, and you have the right to take your own time and hold your own emotional space until you’re ready to let him back in your life.
3) He wants to know about your love life
If he’s been asking your friends about your love life, stalking your social media, or texting to ask you about what’s going on in the romance department then you’re on his radar.
And he’s probably wanting to get back together.
It’s obvious that this guy is very curious about who you’re seeing and your love life.
And it’s definitely a sign he’s back in your orbit and getting ready to ask permission to land.
Want to make him jealous in exactly the right way? Jealousy is powerful – here’s how to harness it.
Try this “Jealousy” text.
— “I think it was a great idea that we decided to start dating other people. I do just want to be friends right now!” —
By saying this, you’re telling him that you’re actually dating other people right now.
You’re communicating that you’re actually wanted by other guys. Men are attracted to women that are wanted by other guys. By saying that you’re dating around already, you’re pretty much saying that “it’s your loss, mister!”
After sending this text he’ll begin to feel attraction for you again, and a “fear of loss” will be triggered.
I learned about this text from Brad Browning, who has helped thousands of women get their ex back. He goes by the moniker of “the relationship geek”, for good reason.
In this excellent free video, he’ll show you exactly what you can do to make your ex boyfriend want you again.
No matter what your situation is — or how badly you’ve messed up since the two of you broke up — he’ll give you a number of useful tips that you can apply immediately.
If you really want your ex boyfriend back, this video will be incredibly helpful.
4) He peppers you with questions
Even though you are having limited or no contact, you may notice that your ex is peppering you with all sorts of questions in general, not only about your love life but about everything.
He wants to know what you’re up to in the future and your opinion on current events.
He’s still asking about your family and what you’re up to.
He wants to build back that rapport and openness you had when you were together, which is a pretty good sign that he wants to get back together.
5) He admits he misses you
This one is pretty obvious: when he admits he misses you and leaves himself open to being hurt again by that he’s making a statement of his feelings.
He’s opening himself to you and being honest that the time apart has been sad for him.
Don’t be too easy of a sell, though. You’re free to do whatever you want, but move slowly before you automatically respond back with “miss you, too.”
Do you want him back now? Are you ready?
Think before you text or call.
I learned this from Brad Browning. I mentioned him above.
Hands down he’s one of the best “get your ex back” coaches out there.
He’s recently released a new video with tips and tricks you can use right now to get your ex boyfriend back.
6) Making plans
Part of your ex trying to contact you a lot is him wanting to have more wrap up discussions about what went wrong.
Or even just to meet up.
He may phrase it as not a date and nothing to do with your relationship, but come on, you weren’t born yesterday.
If he’s making an effort to make future plans and get together with you it means he hasn’t fully let you go and he wants you back.
7) Old habits die hard
If he’s talking to you and using old terms of endearment (“babe” “hun” and so on) then it’s a good sign he’s gearing up to get back in your good graces.
It could just be a habit, sure, but it could also be love.
If he’s calling you by all the old affectionate nicknames and you’re feeling that romantic buzz once again there’s a good chance he’s feeling it, too.
QUIZ: To help you work out whether your ex wants you back, I’ve created a brand new quiz. I’m going to tell it to you straight based on your own situation. Check out my quiz here.
8) He’s your new number one online fan
Careful that this doesn’t cross the line into stalking. If your ex is all over your online profiles (assuming you haven’t blocked him) then it’s a good sign he’ll be coming back one of these days.
Is he throwing “likes” your way like crazy and clearly following every minute of your life online as much as possible?
This is not the actions of a guy who’s moved on, it’s the actions of a guy who wants to get back into your life.
9) He asks your friends about you
If he’s canvassing your friends for info about how you’re doing or what’s new with you then it’s a clear sign you’re still high on his list and he’s thinking of you.
He’s probably feeling pretty sad and out in the cold, too.
He feels cut off from you and wants to get the inside scoop.
He wants to go back to how things were, that much is clear.
10) He’s thinking about the future
The problem isn’t that your ex won’t doesn’t love you again — your past relationship has shown how strong his feelings can be.
If you’ve tried to get back with your ex but failed, perhaps the real problem is a closed mind. He’s already decided not to give you a second chance.
That’s the emotional wall you need to climb over.
So, a sign that your ex wants to get back with you is that he’s thinking only about the future now. He has stopped analyzing the past and the baggage that comes with it.
Here’s why this is so important.
Scientists have recently made an interesting discovery about humans. When relaxed, 80% of the time our mind is imagining the future. We spend a little bit of time contemplating the past and focusing on the present — but most of the time we’re actually thinking about the future.
According to relationship expert James Bauer, the key to reversing a break up is changing what your ex feels when they picture you in their life again.
Forget about convincing him to give things another try. When someone tries to convince you of something, it’s human nature to always come up with a counter argument.
Focus instead on changing the way they feel. How? Simply change the emotions he associates with you and make him picture a whole new relationship.
In this short and genuine video, James Bauer gives you a step-by-step method for changing the way your ex feels about you. He reveals the texts you can send and things you can say that will trigger something deep inside your ex.
Because once you paint a new picture about what your life together could be like, his emotional walls won’t stand a chance.
11) He posts a lot about you or old memories
If you’re the one cruising his social media and notice him posting a lot about you or old memories it can also be a sign that he’s headed on the express train back to you.
This isn’t always obvious. It can be oblique references to you or inside jokes. Maybe sly references to a wild night you had camping or that time he first met you and the conversation you had.
You’ll pick up on what he’s putting down, whether it’s a song you both loved or a line of poetry he used to quote.
This guy wants you back.
12) He’s putting on a show of being over you
This one can be counterintuitive but think about it.
If he’s really over you and never going to come back why is he making a show online and among his friends of being so over you?
Why is he bragging about hooking up with new girls?
Posting photos left and right of him partying it up?
This isn’t the behavior of someone who’s over a relationship. It’s the behavior of someone trying to fill a void they now feel with useless fun and games.
He’ll be back. Just make sure he’s grown up a little before you consider actually taking him back.
What can you do about it?
Let’s face it.
If you want your ex boyfriend back, then you have to do something about it. You can’t just wait for him to come running back to you.
Here are the 3 things to do after a break up:
- Work out why you broke up in the first place
- Become a better version of yourself so you don’t end up in a broken relationship again.
- Formulate a plan of attack to get them back.
If you want some help with number 3 (“the plan”), then you need to watch relationship expert Brad Browning’s excellent free video right now.
This video isn’t for everyone.
In fact, it’s for a very specific person: a man or a woman who has experienced a break up and legitimately believes the breakup was a mistake.
Brad Browning has one goal: to help you win back an ex.
As a certified relationship counselor, and with decades of experience helping to repair broken relationships, Brad will give you a foolproof plan to get them back. He reveals the texts you can send and things you can say to him to make him think, “yep, I made a big mistake!”.
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