Which personality type is the best in bed? Full overview

We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Read our affiliate disclosure.

Can your personality type really dictate how good you are in between the sheets?

It makes sense that who we are as people shape’s how good we are as lovers.

But which personality type is the best in bed?

This article will reveal everything you need to know.

What are personality types?

The idea behind personality types is that people can be categorized as being a certain “type” of a person based on a collection of personality traits that they have.

So for example, you might be considered to have an introverted personality type if you have certain traits associated with introversion — such as being reflective, enjoying solitude, and feeling tired after socializing.

Whilst there has been some scientific research that supports the idea of personality types, other experts are skeptical. They argue that the traits which make up our whole personality exist on a spectrum, and so do not fall into neat little boxes.

Nevertheless, in a bid to better understand ourselves, personality tests have remained popular. And there are plenty of different personality type theories.

Perhaps the most well-known is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and 16 personalities (which is also based on MBTI).

Delving deeper into your personality traits is not only fun, but it can offer you valuable insights into what makes you tick.

Based on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator let’s take a look at what your personality type says about you as a lover, and discover which type is best in bed.

Which personality type is the best in bed?

The characteristics of each different Myers-Briggs Personality Type can offer us clues as to what sort of lover you will most likely be.

There was also research carried out by online pharmacist Superdrug who surveyed over 1,000 Europeans and Americans on how their personalities might impact their sexual preferences.

Together they allow us to build a picture of how your personality type impacts your bedroom behavior.

For example, ISTP (sometimes known as the virtuoso) is the most willing to have a threesome. Whereas the ISFJ (defender) is perhaps the least adventurous in bed.

But when it comes to crowning the King or Queen in between the sheets, it’s not so simple.

Because when it comes to sex, there is no right or wrong, it’s more a case of different strokes for different folks.

Having said that, the following personality types (in no particular order) do get top marks for their bedroom skills:

  • ESTJ — The most sexually active personality type, who aims to please their lover.
  • ENFP — Experimental and open-minded between the sheets.
  • INTP — The ideal combination of sensual, non judgemental, and committed lovers.
  • ISTP — These pleasure seekers are all about following their desire.
  • ENFJ — Is a giving lover who will put their partner first.

Each of the 16 personality types approaches lovemaking differently. Keep on reading to discover what yours reveals about you as a lover.

What your personality type says about your sex life

INFJ — The deep lover

 For this personality type, sex is rarely just sex. They need their sexual encounters to mean something. It can take them a while to open up sexually, but when they are in an intimate relationship they are one of the least selfish lovers out there. They get off on your partner’s pleasure.

  • Most likely to enjoy missionary
  • People pleasing lover
  • Open-minded in the bedroom and willing to experiment

ENFJ — The generous lover

Nothing is too much trouble for ENFJ in the bedroom. They love to please their partner and hate to disappoint. Their willingness to try things out, combined with their giving nature gives them full marks in the bedroom.

  • Second most willing personality type to use sex toys
  • Cares about their partner’s pleasure
  • Enthusiastic lover

INFP — The romantic lover

Sex and love go hand in hand for an INFP personality type. Sex is not just a physical act to them. They demand a deeper emotional bond too. Perhaps these high expectations are the reason why INFP is the most difficult to satisfy in bed.

  • Rank as the most unsatisfied with their sex lives
  • Sensual imagination
  • Seek emotional connection during sex

ENFP — The intense lover

With a high sex drive, ENFP needs an emotional connection before they can unleash the full fervor of their passion. When they do, they show their wild side. They are always up for a bit of experimentation and take an open-minded approach to bedroom antics.

  • Most likely personality type to experiment with the same sex
  • Curious and creative
  • Adventurous lovers

INTJ — The perfectionist lover

INTJ personality types take their natural dedication and desire to excel into the bedroom with them. That means they are always improving and honing their technique. Sex is a rare place where this personality type can detach from overthinking.

  • Favorite position is doggy-style
  • Always tried to rise to the challenge
  • Likes to take charge in the bedroom

ENTJ — The adventurous lover

This personality type is adventurous to the core in the bedroom. They rank as the most likely to use sex toys and engage in role-playing and bondage. Their natural aggression can work well for them in the bedroom as they take charge.

  • Experimental
  • Rank as having the highest overall appetite for adventure
  • Rank second highest for being most sexually satisfied

INTP — The committed lover

INTP personality type proves that quality means a lot more than quantity. They rank as having the lowest number of sexual partners. Yet they ranked in the top five personality types for their willingness to experiment — including bondage, anal, threesomes, and role-playing.

  • Less likely to have one-night stands
  • Open to new things
  • Non-judgemental lovers

ENTP — The intellectual lover

This personality type knows what they like, and aren’t afraid to tell you. They are always open-minded to trying out new things in the bedroom. They get just as turned on by someone’s mind as they do their body and could be considered almost sapiosexual.

  • Ranked ​​as least likely to be mistaken about their sexual preference
  • Flirty and sensual
  • Experimental

ISTJ — The diligent lover

Sex just like every other part of an ISTJ’s life needs to be carefully considered and organized. Whilst they aim to deliver excellency in the bedroom (albeit, in an orderly and scheduled fashion) they may not tell you what they want, and require some coaxing to be brought out of their shell.

  • Rank least likely to vocalize what they want in bed
  • Organized lovers
  • Dislikes surprises in the bedroom

 ESTJ — The dominant lover

ESTJ’s can have a bit of an ego when it comes to their bedroom antics. They bring their naturally aggressive streak with them and like to take charge and show off their prowess. They are happy to let go and simply enjoy the physical side of sex, with no strings attached.

  • Rank as the most sexually active personality type (highest frequency)
  • Rank as the most sexually satisfied personality type

ISFJ — The devoted lover

This personality type is known for its devoted approach to lovemaking. They will pick up on what their partner needs, and aim to deliver it. They don’t like to push boundaries in life, and that goes for sex too. They prefer to stick to what they know works, rather than experiment.

  • Least adventurous in bed
  • Likes to connect with their partner through sex
  • Committed lover

ESFJ — The affectionate lover

ESFJ’s relish the opportunity to try to make their partner happy in the bedroom. They prefer a committed relationship over sleeping around, and are emotional lovers. This allows them to connect in a more loving way.

  • Prefer sex in a relationship
  • Emotional
  • Less adventours sexually than other personality types

ISTP — The free spirited lover

The sensuality of this personality type shines through. They inhabit a world of pleasure, and sex is a big part of that. They are sexually open and not averse to having multiple sexual partners on the go at once.

  • Enjoys the physical side of sex
  • Enjoys being controlled in bed
  • Visually turned on

ESTP — The exciting lover

A few factors come together to make this personality type an exciting bed partner. They are likely to have a high sex drive, rank the least likely to be mistaken about their sexual preferences, and are not afraid to try new things.

  • Knows what they like, and will ask for it
  • Open to trying different sexual positions
  • Athletic in the bedroom

ISFP — The accommodating lover

Whilst being an accommodating lover may not so all too sexy at first, the ISFP personality type’s willingness to put their sexual partner’s needs first makes them feel comfortable and desired. They are good at showing their feelings through the act of sex. Where they can fall down is in their ability to know what they like and don’t like

  • Rank second most likely to be mistaken about their sexual preferences 
  • Expressive lovers
  • Have a knack for making their partners feel special

ESFP — The intuitive lover

The combination of extroverted sensing along with introverted feeling makes this personality a great lover. They are curious and open-minded by nature. They have an intuitive skill for attuning to the needs of both body and mind.

  • Observant and in-tune partner
  • Enjoys sex both in a relationship or as a fling
  • Rank the least likely personality type to experiment with a member of the same gender.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get $50 off your first session (exclusive offer for Hack Spirit readers).

Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

10 unfortunate signs your ex is seeing someone else (and what you can do about it)

The top 10 personality traits that predict success