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10 no bullish*t ways to make a guy enjoy spending time with you (complete guide)

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You really like this guy, and you want to make sure he feels the same.

For love to blossom, you need to make sure he really enjoys spending time with you.

This article will help you with some practical tips.

1) Suggest doing fun things

It’s easy to fall into cliched routines when we start dating someone.

Coming up with fun and unique date ideas isn’t always so simple. And so we can tend to stick to more tried and tested dates.

Things like going out for a drink, heading to the movies, or just hanging out and doing nothing in particular.

But these aren’t always the best ways to get to know each other. The more memorable the date, the more likely he is to have a good time.

Show him your personality by suggesting some fun and unique things to do. Don’t Netflix and chill, instead opt for an activity.

It also takes the pressure off by giving you something to put your attention on.

It might be anything from rollerblading to bowling, bike riding, going on a hike, amusement parks, or a concert.

If getting active isn’t really your kind of thing then there are plenty of other things you can do — like picnics in the park or cosy board game nights.

The point is to think outside the box.

If you make sure your dates and time together is memorable and fun, he’s more likely to enjoy spending time with you.

Here are just a few more suggestions to get you started:

* Mini-golf

* Cooking together

* Visiting flea markets

* Go stargazing

* Karaoke

* Play each other at video games

* Go on a day trip to a nearby city or tourist attraction

* Play pool

* Go to a quiz night

* Take an exercise class together

2) Be yourself

I know when we like someone, we want to impress them.

We all want to show off our best side to our crush, but it’s important to be yourself too.

The truth is that faking things isn’t going to work in the long run anyway because:

  1. a) It will come across as trying too hard and insincere, which will put him off.
  2. b) There’s no point being anyone other than who you really are if it’s going to work out between you.

So don’t try too hard and don’t be afraid to let him see the real you.

If you’re shy, don’t pretend to be outgoing. If you’re outgoing, don’t try to act all coy. Be honest about what makes you happy, your likes and dislikes.

If you’re passionate about music, play some of your favorite bands. If you’re creative, show him some of your work or talk about some of your favorite artists. If you’re a bookworm, start a discussion about your fave novels.

Remember, dating isn’t an audition.

It’s a chance for two people to try to get to know each other more. So share with him and open up about what makes you tick.

Often it’s the quirks we try to hide from people that make us memorable and unique.

Letting him see the real you will make him feel closer to you and help him understand why you’re special.

3) Give him space

When you first meet someone new, you’ll probably want to spend all your time with them.

You could find yourself constantly thinking about your crush, days not seeing each other can feel like weeks apart, and you want to hang out with him any chance you get.

This is perfectly normal and natural.  But if you want him to really enjoy spending time with you, resist the urge for non-stop contact.

Regardless of whether you’ve only just started hanging out or if you’ve been seeing each other for a while, you should give him some space.

Here’s why:

Chocolate ice cream might be your favorite dessert, but eat it every single day of the week and it’s not going to taste the same after a while.

You can have too much of a good thing.

It’s just a part of human psychology. The more available something is, the less we value it.

You want him to feel like getting to spend time with you is special. The best way to do that is not to spend 24-7 together.

Don’t always be available for him. Don’t be clingy either. When we sense someone is too needy or demanding of our time, it makes us pull back.

Of course, it doesn’t mean you need to stop talking to him or play games, but it does mean you shouldn’t be texting him every five minutes.

Give him some breathing room and let him come to you.

How do you make a man want you more?

Only by having some time apart can he begin to miss you, which will make him far more likely to enjoy the time you do spend together.

4) Bring out his inner hero

This tip is guaranteed to make him enjoy spending time with you by triggering a biological drive within him.

A huge part of how a guy feels about a girl he spends time with comes down to how she makes him feel.

You see, for guys, it’s all about triggering their inner hero.

I learned about this from the hero instinct. Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept is about what really drives men in relationships, which is ingrained in their DNA.

And it’s something most women don’t know anything about.

Once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit stronger when they find someone who knows how to trigger it.

Now, you may be wondering why it’s called “the hero instinct”? Do guys really need to feel like superheroes to commit to a woman?

Not at all. Forget about Marvel. You won’t need to play the damsel in distress or buy your man a cape.

The easiest thing to do is to check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here.

He shares some easy tips to get you started, such as sending him a 12-word text that will trigger his hero instinct right away.

Because that’s the beauty of the hero instinct.

It’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you and only you.

Click here to watch the free video.

5) Take an interest in things he likes

It’s a scientifically backed fact that we like people more who ask us questions.

Why?

Human beings love talking about themselves. So we like people who listen to us, and show an interest in us.

If you want a guy to enjoy spending time with you, make sure it’s not all “me, me, me”.

Let it be an exchange of information and conversation, but be sure to ask him plenty of questions that show you are genuinely interested in getting to know him better.

As the authors of research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology highlighted:

“The tendency to focus on the self when trying to impress others is misguided, as verbal behaviors that focus on the self, such as redirecting the topic of conversation to oneself, bragging, boasting, or dominating the conversation, tend to decrease liking…In contrast, verbal behaviors that focus on the other person, such as mirroring the other person’s mannerisms, affirming the other’s statements, or coaxing information from the other person, have been shown to increase liking.”

Ask about his hobbies, favorite movies, books, music, etc. This will help him feel important and appreciated.

Asking him questions and really listening to his answers also shows you care about him. And hopefully, he’ll reciprocate.

6) Do fun things without him

Just as you need to give him his space, you should also value yours too.

The more interesting you are solo, the more interesting you are when you’re in a couple too.

Sometimes couples who spend all of their time together end up running out of things to talk about.

It’s easy to lose ourselves in someone else, especially when we’re falling in love. But it’s important to maintain a certain amount of independence to create happy and contended relationships.

Don’t ditch your friends. Give time to other people and activities that you value in life.

You may have heard that the secret to making him want you even more is pulling away. But the truth is that this is manipulation and game playing and will always backfire on you in the end.

The healthy solution is simply to have a well-rounded life. This will make you a little bit unavailable (and hence more desirable) in a sincere rather than fake way.

It’s not game playing, you just have other things in your life as well as him. And that is incredibly sexy.

So don’t be tempted to be consumed by being with him. Try to balance having fun together, and being alone and doing your own thing.

That way when you do see him, you’ll have plenty to talk about and catch up on.

7) Laugh together

Dating doesn’t have to be so serious. One of the best ways to make sure he enjoys spending time with you is to laugh together.

Research has shown how women love a guy who makes them laugh. But rather interestingly, men on the other hand are less impressed by funny women in particular and like it more when a woman laughs at their jokes.

I’m guessing because it flatters their ego and makes them feel good about themselves.

But best of all is when couples laugh together. In fact, research says that those who do are much stronger and more likely to stay together.

Some gentle and playful teasing can help his attraction to you because it shows off your intelligence.

Don’t worry, you don’t have to be a total comedian to create more laughter on your dates.

Alongside teasing him a bit, other great ways to create a more light-hearted environment include:

– Watching funny shows and movies together

– Going to comedy gigs

– Creating inside jokes

– Being silly with each other

The key is to make it inclusive so that it is something that draws you closer together. So although some playful teasing is cool, you don’t want to mock or belittle him so that he feels like the joke is on him.

8) Appreciate him

We often go looking for secret tricks and tips to make a guy go crazy for us, when it’s actually the little things that have the biggest impact.

A guy wants to feel like his efforts don’t go unnoticed.

Feeling respected and valued is part of what helps him to feel like a real man. He wants to know that he makes you happy and that you appreciate him.

That’s why showing and expressing gratitude towards him goes a long way. Say thanks, and make a point of anything he does that you think is special.

Make sure he realizes that you see the qualities that make him who he is, and that you cherish them.

This actually relates back to the unique concept I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.

When a man feels respected, useful, and needed, he’s more likely to enjoy spending time with you. And the best part is, triggering his hero instinct can be as simple as knowing the right thing to say over a text.

You can learn exactly what to do by watching this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.

9) Be confident

It never goes out of fashion and it ALWAYS looks good on you no matter what.

I’m talking about confidence.

It’s another of those psychological facts about human nature. The more someone acts as though they are awesome, the more we believe they must be.

Let’s put it into the context of sales:

If someone is trying to get you to buy something that they don’t really believe in themselves, something tells me you aren’t going to be convinced either.

We’re not talking about arrogance or bravado here.

Real confidence comes from having good self-esteem. The more you love and value yourself, the more likely others will too.

I realize that building your own confidence can feel like more of a long game.

Wouldn’t it be much easier if there was just a simple phrase you could say or easy action to take that guaranteed he would love spending time with you?

But sadly, just like those quick-fix diets that promise the earth and never deliver, life doesn’t quite work like that.

I promise you that investing in your own self-love and self-worth is going to be well worth it in the end.

It’s not only going to help you attract and keep great guys in your life, but it’s going to make you happier and more successful in general.

10) Find out the things you have in common

They say that opposites attract, but it’s not really true.

Whilst some differences spice up a relationship and offer opportunities for growth, generally speaking, we tend to like people who are like us.

So if you want him to enjoy the time you spend together, figure out your common ground.

Understand what you have in common and build your time together around that. Doing activities that you both like is going to be way more fun.

But it doesn’t mean that if you have some different interests that it’s a bad thing. These can still bring you closer together. You just need to find ways to bridge the gap.

Try teaching each other new things.

For example, if he is a great surfer, get him to take you on a lesson. If you are a whizz on piano, teach him a song.

You can bond and find things to share in both the things you already have in common, as well as your unique skills and interests.

Bottom line: How can you make sure he wants to spend time with you

The tips in this article will help to ensure that the object of your affection keeps coming back for more.

They’re practical tools that create a healthy amount of desire, respect and mutual attraction.

Ultimately if he enjoys spending time with you, then you’ll know because he will keep making an effort to see you.

The key is getting through to your man in a way that empowers both him and you.

I mentioned the concept of the hero instinct earlier — by appealing directly to his primal instincts, you won’t only ensure he likes spending time with you, but you’ll take your relationship further than ever before.

And since this free video reveals exactly how to trigger your man’s hero instinct, you could make this change from as early as today.

With James Bauer’s incredible concept, he’ll see you as the only woman for him. So if you’re ready to take that plunge, be sure to check out the video now.

Here’s a link to his excellent free video again.

 

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.

Written by Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash has years of experience writing relationship articles for single females looking for love. After being single for years with no hope of meeting Mr. Right, she finally managed to get married to the love of her life. Now that she’s settled down and happier than she’s ever been in her life, she's passionate about sharing all the wisdom she's learned over the journey.

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