10 warning signs your partner secretly hates you

Have you been getting a strange feeling from your partner, like something’s not right?

Like, maybe they hate you?

Then you’ve probably been telling yourself, “I’m just being paranoid”, because surely, if your partner hated you, they would have left you, right?


I’ve seen it happen too many times… People stay in relationships with partners they can’t stand for a variety of reasons.

But how can you be sure that you’re not imagining things?

By paying attention to these 10 warning signs your partner secretly hates you.

Are you ready to learn the truth?

1) You feel like you don’t know them

Ever look at your partner and feel like you’re looking at a complete stranger?

Well, that’s what happens when the connection two people once shared is broken. You’ll feel like they’re no longer the person you once knew.

And if they’ve started to become resentful and harbor negative feelings about you, you’ll look at their face and see something that wasn’t there before…

This could be a warning sign your partner secretly hates you, at the very least, it’s a sign that something is seriously wrong in your relationship.

2) You don’t talk

Good communication is one of the pillars of a healthy relationship. Take that away, and you could be looking at another warning sign.

But wait, don’t panic just yet!

A lack of communication without any of the other signs in this article isn’t proof enough.

If your partner becomes distant and avoids serious conversations, there could be something else bothering them, like trouble at work or a general dissatisfaction with their life.

So, be warned, but look for more signs because it doesn’t necessarily mean that they hate you.

3) They’re constantly criticizing you

Sure, some people can be pretty critical of everything and everyone. So, ask yourself, “Have they always been this critical?” and “Do they find fault with everyone, or is it just me?”

Because here’s the thing: When you hate someone, you’re gonna hate everything about them. From what they say to how they chew their food – everything will annoy you.

Just be careful not to mistake constructive and well-meaning criticism with the criticism of someone who hates you. Their criticism is unfounded, aggressive, constant, and definitely not well-meaning.

4) You’re no longer intimate

If you can’t remember the last time you had sex, it could mean trouble.

You see, a sudden or prolonged lack of intimacy could signal emotional or relational issues.

And if you’ve been trying to initiate sex, only to have them come up with an excuse not to have any, something is definitely up.

It makes sense if you think about it – when you’re fed up with someone, feel resentment or even hatred, the last thing you want to do is be intimate with them.

Once again, there are several things that could be at the root of the problem, it doesn’t always have to mean that they hate you. That’s why it’s important to look at all the signs and examine your partner’s overall behavior toward you.

5) They’re not interested

If your partner never asks how your day went, how things are at work, or if your grandma is doing better, then either they’re extremely self-centered, or they just don’t care.

I mean, when two people love each other and share a deep connection, they take a real interest in each other’s lives.

They care about what the other person is going through in their day-to-day lives.

They want to be there for each other.

So if your partner shows little or no interest in your life or struggles, it could be another warning sign that they secretly hate you.

6) There’s constant negativity

If your partner is starting to wear you down with their constant negativity, it could be another sign that you need to re-examine your relationship.

Be observant: Are they only negative in your company?

Are they fun and chirpy when other people are around and then have a complete change of mood when you’re alone?

A consistently negative attitude can have a negative impact on a relationship.

Unfortunately, one of the reasons for so much negativity could be how your partner feels about you.

7) You’re always arguing

Does it feel like your relationship has turned into one fight after another?

Do you think twice before opening your mouth to say something, because you know it could be the beginning of another round of arguing?

Maybe your partner is unhappy, maybe they’re angry, or maybe they really do hate you, but one thing’s for sure, something’s seriously wrong in your relationship.

You definitely need to get to the bottom of what’s going on and see if the relationship can be salvaged.

If not, you need to get out, like yesterday because it’s too toxic for you to stay.

8) Your partner is stonewalling

Stonewalling is worse than arguing if you ask me.

It means your partner refuses to talk about any issues you have and instead, they become withdrawn and distant.

If there’s a problem, it needs to come out and be discussed, even if that means it could lead to an argument.

Stonewalling is a very unhealthy way of dealing, or rather, not dealing with a problem.

I’m sorry to say that if you’re being stonewalled, it could be another sign your partner hates you and has given up on working things out between you.

9) They’re making constant comparisons

If you keep hearing “My ex was a better cook” or “Look at so-and-so, they really know how to look good” it doesn’t sound like your partner thinks much of you, does it?

Constant comparisons where their ex or other people of the opposite sex come out great and you come out like a loser make one thing clear – they’re dissatisfied. More than that, they don’t love you.

10) They withdraw affection

Trust me, I know how painful it can be when your partner withdraws their affection – be it physical or emotional.

If you’re experiencing a consistent and severe withdrawal of affection, it’s a valid cause for concern and can be seen as a red flag for serious relationship problems.

No matter how hard someone tries to pretend that everything is okay in a relationship, without affection, eventually, everything will come out.

The bottom line

Taken separately, each of these warning signs is just that, a warning sign. These signs don’t necessarily mean that your partner secretly hates you, but they’re a definite indicator that something is wrong.

The more signs you spot as being present in your relationship, the greater the chance that you were right, they really do hate you.

I would recommend confronting your partner about your concerns.

If they claim that they don’t hate you, that it’s something else, then it could be a good idea to speak to a couples therapist to see if you can get to the bottom of the problem and work to save your relationship.

Good luck!

Jelena Dincic

Jelena has a background in photography and film-making and has spent the last few years as a content editor and copywriter. Jelena is a citizen of the world who is passionate about travel and learning about new cultures. She’s a foodie who loves to cook. And, as an art lover, she is always experimenting with new art mediums. When she’s not at her computer, she’s usually out and about in some forest with her dogs.

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