Playing it cool becomes far more challenging when attracted to someone.
We want the object of our desires to feel the same way, so we tend to be extra cautious of our actions and behaviors.
Every word, every minor movement begins to take on new meaning in our heads.
Yet despite this, some people can hide their feelings better than others.
They can become a tough read, perhaps sending out mixed, even ambiguous signals.
As humans, the concept of attraction can be confusing, and bewildering and occasionally stress out those involved.
But there will always be tells.
In this article, I’ll take you through the unique things people tend to do when they feel attracted to you.
So if a few of these items sound familiar, someone may just be crushing on you.
Let’s get to it!
1) They’ll listen actively and be present
I knew my last relationship was in trouble when I realized that we stopped genuinely listening to each other.
Towards the end, the majority of our communication would be limited to small talk.
When either of us tried to express something more meaningful, the opposing person’s attention would almost always be compromised.
We’d scroll mindlessly through social media, or get distracted by Netflix (among other things) while our significant other spoke–something that eventually triggered plenty of resentment.
Remember, in a relationship, there’s such a thing as being too comfortable.
So if you notice someone constantly paying close attention to what you say, remembering key details, making thoughtful remarks, asking inquisitive questions, and simply showing genuine interest in your thoughts and feelings, this is likely a sign of something deeper…
2) They try to stay close to you
This one is no secret: when you’re attracted to a person, you want to reach out and touch them…
Or at the very least, have them physically close to you.
The opposite is true, unless you are a physically touchy person, when you’re not into someone, instinctively you’ll likely recoil when they invade your space.
So if you find that someone is consistently making excuses to be physically near you, say by sitting next to you, standing near you, gently touching your arms, giving light playful nudges, or leaning in during conversations, this is almost always a sign of attraction.
They’ll also likely prioritize time with you, making an effort to include you in their plans and inviting you to events and shared activities… a way to sort of test the waters before advancing further.
3) Their body language is open and inviting
In case you haven’t gotten the memo: body language and non-verbal gestures account for most of our in-person communication.
So if you suspect someone is into you, it’s worth paying extra attention to their body language.
Are they open and inviting when you’re around? Or closed off and cold?
Gestures like prolonged eye contact, having open postures, smiling frequently, licking lips, and so on are all very reliable signs of attraction.
I’ve also found mirroring to be quite a common sign of magnetic allure.
You see… when you are drawn towards somebody, you tend to subconsciously mimic their gestures, expressions, and body language.
For instance, if you lean forward, they will too.
If you touch your glass, maybe they will too.
Mirroring is our subconscious trying to create a sense of rapport and connection with somebody–and a powerful indicator of attraction.
4) They regularly compliment and flatter you
When someone is attracted to you, they want you to feel valued and special.
They want you to know that the little things about you don’t go unnoticed.
So they’ll frequently make positive remarks about your physical features, your abilities, your more obscure personality traits, your sense of style, etc.
If they’re truly into you, most of their feedback will be genuine too.
They see something in you that almost chemically draws them in and makes them want to say these things.
They want you to feel wanted.
5) They text you all the time
If you notice someone is suddenly beginning to text you or send you memes a bit too regularly, this usually points to something more profound… like attraction.
Trust me, after a certain age, most people aren’t truly looking for new friends to communicate with every day.
So if you consistently get messages from a certain someone who is just “saying hello” or “making conversation,” they’re essentially subtly hinting at their feelings for you.
They want to make a connection and be a part of your life.
Hence, they’ll often make the effort to stay in touch and sort of hang around and plant the seed until they consider it time to make a more substantial move.
6) They get nervous and fidgety around you
I think all of us have had crushes in the past.
Remember your sophomore year in high school when you had the chance to get closer to your crush through, say, a group project for biology class?
I know I do.
I was so fearful of saying the wrong thing or looking stupid, that I would barely be able to speak; and when I did speak, I’d often stumble over my words.
The nervous anxiety was palpable to everyone in my vicinity, not just my crush.
Well, I have news for you: nervous energy isn’t just limited to fifteen-year-old boys.
We all tend to get a little nervous around someone we find incredibly attractive.
Behaviors like fidgeting, blushing, trying to act excessively cool and collected, and stuttering while speaking, are all signs of the kind of nervous energy when you feel interested in someone.
So if an otherwise confident and collected person becomes flustered in your presence, this can be very telling.
7) They become extra generous
When someone is attracted to you or has feelings for you, they’ll often go the extra mile to do you favors.
They want you to feel special.
They want you to know that they’re kind and generous… and therefore an ideal partner for you.
They’ll do things that are, technically speaking, inconvenient for them… going out of their way to perform these tasks.
Maybe they’ll offer to drive you places, even if it’s not on their route; maybe they’ll bring you coffee in the morning; maybe they’ll send you food or gifts randomly.
The bottom line is, that when your attraction to someone is significant enough, you find yourself becoming far more generous and giving than normal.
So if a few of these signs sound familiar, then someone you know is probably attracted to you.
If there’s reciprocal interest on your part, then great.
The ball is in your court. Consider it time to return a few of the gestures and take it from there.