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What is a twin flame? The ultimate guide to something very special

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The most significant relationship you will ever have is with your twin flame.

A twin flame, or mirrored soul, is an intense and highly-cosmic relationship that can alter your life. Meeting your twin flame is also the most powerful part of your spiritual journey.

Unfortunately, twin flame relationships aren’t always peaceful and easy-going.

How do you know if you’ve met yours? Is there a difference between a soulmate and a twin flame? Does it always have to be romantic?

There are so many questions surrounding twin flame relationships.

That’s why we’ve put together this in-depth guide covering everything you need to know about twin flame relationships and how to find yours.

 

 

What is a twin flame

A twin flame is the other half of your soul.

At energetic conception our souls are split into two parts. Often referred to as your “mirror soul”, a twin flame is your mirrored image, or in other words, a reflection of your spirit.

If you are fortunate to connect with your twin flame in this lifetime, it will be a profoundly familiar experience. You will feel as if you have known this person your entire life.

You may even refer to meeting him/her as “home”.

It should be noted, however, that even though you may feel “whole” around this person, that is a misconception about twin flame dynamics. You are already whole at inception, despite your soul being divided in two.

Your twin flame is not meant to complete you.

Rather, the purpose of your twin flame journey is to awaken your spirit and push you towards karmic growth.

Purposes of the twin flame journey

  • Reflect your weaknesses
  • Release trauma wounds
  • Uncover your true potential
  • Discover inner barriers

 

The ultimate purpose of experiencing the twin flame journey is to heal yourself by discovering and your weaknesses and unlocking your trauma.

This allows you to experience your true limitless potential.

That said, twin flame relationships are often very challenging. You are shown your biggest insecurities and compelled to address them in order for your spiritual growth to happen.

12 signs you’ve met your twin flame

Unlike a soulmate relationship, a twin flame relationship, according to Lachlan Brown of HackSpirit, is built on “the give and take, hot and cold, black and white of a relationship rather than the similarities between two people that are often more common in relationships.”

It is an extraordinary and powerful bond between two people that, when discovered, can help your path of self-discovery blossom and grow.

So how do you know if you have met this person? Watch out for these 12 signs

1) Instant familiarity

You feel as if you have known this person forever. Instinctually, you will feel safe and comfortable to be yourself, despite their being a stranger. You both will feel a strong sense of belonging.

2) Time seems to not exist with them 

When you are in one another’s company, you will feel as if time moves at light speed, as if it doesn’t even exist.

3) You feel a magnetic pull towards them 

When they are far away, you want to be near them. When they are near you, you want to be closer.

The two of you are often arm in arm or have some part of your physical body touching.

This is a deeper sensation than simply missing someone or lusting for someone. This will feel like an internal pull towards their soul.

4) You have matching interests 

You seem to share a lot in common and have parallel ideas, virtues, and hopes. Even if you aren’t familiar with one of their interests or hobbies, you want to be and vice versa.

5) Your insecurities feel magnified

One of the truths of a twin flame relationship is that they mirror not just your good qualities and strengths, but also your weaknesses.

Meeting your twin flame will be as if someone is reflecting the traits within yourself that you need to improve upon and they are doing so with a very large magnifying glass.

6) You feel inspired to be better 

As your twin flame is in a sense, your mirror, it is easy to look objectively at the traits you would like to work on and set goals for your personal growth.

You feel a sense to push through past trauma and pain as your twin flame will often illuminate how much these no longer serve your ultimate potential.

You want to become a better version of yourself.

7) Your connection is turbulent

Your twin flame and you will often not see eye to eye.

That is because you and they will often feel acutely self-aware and see your own weaknesses during times of conflict.

And who likes to see their flaws reflected back when they are vulnerable? Both of you may subconsciously create conflict as you resist seeing your truth.

8) The sex is dynamic

If the relationship is a romantic connection, (as not all twin flame relationships are), the sex and physical connection will be mind-blowing.

There will be a cosmic connection, as if you are quite literally on the same wavelength. You will feel deeply satisfied in every aspect of your physical relationship.

9) You share similar past experiences

Even though you and your twin flame may be different ages, or are from different backgrounds, you will notice that you share similar past experiences.

Perhaps you lived on the same block? Maybe you both lost a parent at a young age or visited the same city as children?

You will find yourself often swapping stories followed by “oh me too!” as you notice your likenesses.

10) You are comfortable trusting them

Because your twin flame is immediately familiar to you, despite being a stranger, you feel curiously trusting of them right away.

You may even notice that early on in the relationship you and they are telling one another things that you had never told anyone before or only a few select people.

Your twin flame doesn’t earn your trust, per se. Rather, you instinctively give it to them.

11) They show up in your dreams 

Your connection with your twin flame is so intense, so instantly, and so deep, that you may notice that you are often dreaming of them.

They occupy so much of your soul that even your subconscious mind is comfortable with them.

12) You have an overwhelming feeling of deja-vu

It will almost be difficult to describe the connection between you and your twin flame. So often you will feel as if you have experienced a moment with them before like it is deja-vu.

This is because they are your mirrored half, a reflection of you, your nuances, personality, and experiences.

What does twin flame energy feel like?

Now that you know what a twin flame is and the signs that you may have met yours, how can you really be sure that is what you’re experiencing?

What does that energy really feel like?

According to twin flame life coach, Vickie Champion, twin flame energy feels like

  • Bolts of lightning running through your body.
  • A strong magnet is pulling you towards your twin.
  • An expansive feeling of warmth.
  • An indescribable deep love.

Twin flame energy is unlike any other kind of energetic connection you have experienced.

It will feel familiar but new at the same time. It is uniquely intense and draws you in deeply towards their spiritual growth as well as your own.

In her article for loveconnection.org, Tina Fey describes 19 characteristics of twin flame energy but most notably mentions the most important aspect of this dynamic: a twin flame drives you to your higher purpose.

“Not only do mirror souls inspire each other to become the greatest version of themselves but they inspire each other to do even more.When they unite their energy, twin flames are able to achieve their higher purposes, whether it’s helping other people, working for a cause, bringing about vital change in society, or anything else.”

Twin Flame vs. Soulmate

Twin FlameSoulmate
You only have one twin flame in your lifetime – they are your energetic counterpart.You may have limitless soulmates. Ther are part of your soul family.
The relationship is always intense, often tumultuous and the person is instinctively familiar. You will feel like you have met your other half.These relationships are often easy and joyous. You feel complimented but completed
The purpose is to ignite a spiritual awakening. Past traumas will reignite and you will be challenged to work through them.Soulmates inspire us to be better versions of our present self but do not motivate us to improve or let go of our weaknesses.

Stages of the twin flame journey

Recall that the purpose of the twin flame journey is to discover your inner self by being exposed to your open wounds.

Ultimately, you each serve to transform one another towards spiritual enlightenment.

Every relationship has a unique and subjective path it must follow. However, the twin flame journey has a particular narrative with each stage acting as a progression from the previous one.

While every relationship will be a bit different in their stages, here are the 7 common stages of a twin flame relationship:

Stage 1: Longing

Before you even meet your twin flame you will often feel like a part of you is “missing”. In this stage, you may subconsciously be longing for “the one” and feel like there is another person out there that may complete you.

This stage begins the preliminary tasks of discovering deeper self-awareness.

Stage 2: Meeting

The most intoxicating stage in the journey.

This is where you and your twin flame meet. Your encounter will be intense and you will experience a surge of emotions and a curious sense of “belonging”.

What follows during this stage is the honeymoon phase. You will feel a strong magnetic attraction to your twin flame.

Whether the relationship is platonic or romantic, you will fall captivated by this person and want to be around one another all of the time.

You will often feel like you are “home”.

Stage 3: Challenging

Eventually, all flames burn out. And this flame will seem to diminish just as intensely as it was ignited

Not long after the honeymoon phase, you will notice that challenges may arise more and more frequently. Your insecurities become heightened and past open wounds and trauma come to the surface.

It is important to know that although this phase will be painful and profoundly uncomfortable, it is meant to remind you of the inner work you need to do individually.

Stage 4: Mirroring crisis

Remember that your twin flame is a mirror of you which means sooner than later, your relationship with them will reveal all of the parts of you that you have tried to evade and hide from.

Seeing ourselves for who we really are can be terrifying.

This stage of the twin flame journey will mean that you are confronted with the shadowed side of you; your weaknesses, self-worth, insecurities, and judgements.

During this stage, it isn’t uncommon for one partner to abandon the relationship entirely.

Stage 5: The chase

This stage of the twin flame journey is often referred to as the “separation phase”.

During this phase, there will always be a runner and a chaser. Usually, the runner is the one who abandons the relationship.

The chase occurs when one person is pushing and the other is pulling. And because neither of you have matured into your necessary spiritual development, there will be friction and ultimately, separation.

This separation may or may not be permanent but it is perhaps the most important stage in the twin flame journey in that this is where you begin to really grow.

You will be overcome with sadness and begin to question your passions and purpose. You may spiral and try desperately to feel the void you felt in being around your twin flame.

But don’t fret.

This phase is necessary and is part of your spiritual growing pain.

Stage 6: Surrender

The surrender stage of the twin flame journey isn’t about giving up on your twin flame. Rather it is about accepting the realization that you each serve a very integral purpose in one another’s spiritual awakening.

This phase is about surrendering ego and letting go of your attachment to your twin flame and in turn, focusing on yourself and your healing.

You will feel lighter and more free as you begin to close the open wounds your twin flame mirror exposed.

You have confronted your shadow and let it go.

Stage 7: Oneness

This final stage of the twin flame journey is the most important.

During this phase, we begin to experience a sense of oneness. We gain sight of the fact that we are whole and complete on our own and our twin flame was brought into our life to remind us of that.

We also are reminded that they too, are complete entirely on their own.

We may or may not reunite with our twin flame in this lifetime. This depends on the progression of their spiritual journey. But regardless, during this stage, peace arises and our awakening has fully begun.

Recognizing a false twin flame

  • Are they really my twin flame??
  • I feel like I’m losing control.
  • Why do they always leave when things get tough?
  • We seem so different now.

 

If any of these thoughts have popped up in your mind during the course of your twin flame journey, it is very possible that you have met a FALSE twin flame.

What is a false twin flame?

A false twin flame is a person that appears to be your twin flame upon meeting.

Yes, you feel a strong and intense connection. Yes, the attraction is real and familiar. And yes, this person still helps to awaken your spiritual growth.

However, that’s where the pleasant part of the journey ends.

A false twin flame prepares you for meeting your true twin flame by helping to clear karma but unfortunately, this isn’t generally an easy process. It may even be toxic to some degree. While a true twin flame experience absolutely has its tricky and painful moments, ultimately, you receive an authentic sense of spiritual development.

So how do you know if you are in a false twin flame relationship?

5 signs they may be your false twin flame

1) You constantly find yourself doubting the connection

One of the biggest signs you may be in a false twin flame relationship is ongoing feelings of uncertainty and doubt.

Even though initially, things on the surface may seem well, there will be an inner question, tugging at your heart, wondering if things are meant to be.

2) You begin to self-destruct

A false twin flame is meant to help you prepare for your awakening. This means they will undoubtedly bring up a lot of anxieties and trauma wounds.

The difference between a true twin flame and a false one, however, is that a true twin flame will help you realize your respective journeys.

A false twin flame will abandon you in this time of need and you will often feel pulled by weighted past trauma. You may feel as if you are losing control or overwhelmed with anxious or negative thoughts and intentions.

You may even feel love-bombed.

3) You don’t feel supported

When you are in a false twin flame relationship, you ultimately do not support one another.

When trials and challenges appear in the relationship, your false twin’s commitment to you will fade and they may even abandon you.

A true twin flame will understand that struggle is part of the journey and their commitment will strengthen when things get rocky.

4) Your differences become more apparent with time

A false twin flame may initially have many things in common with you. You may feel as if you and they share interests, hopes, and values.

But over time, differences will become more apparent. You will begin to feel a rift or a divide between the two of you, unlike the magnetism you would feel with a real twin flame.

Your differences may even make you feel like strangers to one another and the challenges that come from this will be very difficult.

5) A false twin shows you how to survive

A false twin flame will unravel and uncover all of your deep wounds.

They will trigger old patterns and behaviors that prevent you from becoming your highest self but will not help in showing you how to work with those wounds.

Your true twin flame will show you how to thrive.

They will mirror your deep wounds but help guide you towards letting them go so that you can become your true limitless self.

How to attract your twin flame?

Recall that while we may have many soulmates in our lifetime(s), we only have one true twin flame.  However, it’s important to note that not everyone will be fortunate enough to reunite with their mirrored soul in this lifetime.

A twin flame relationship is meant to force you to see the parts of you that you need to karmically clean so that you can continue towards your spiritual journey. This relationship can catapult your spiritual growth towards true awakening.

That is, if you are lucky enough to find it.

So how do you meet your twin flame?

It’s not really as simple as asking and receiving or downloading a dating app. The universe tends to have better-laid plans.

That said, a bit of manifesting never hurts.

If you find that you are experiencing a longing or a sense of wanting to find “that person” who may be your other half, you are likely ready to find your twin flame.

These are the 4 ways to attract your twin flame:

1) Use the Law Of Attraction

According to the Law of Attraction, like attracts like. Furthermore, your thoughts and the words you speak create the world around you.

To attract your twin flame using the law of attraction, start by deciding if you truly feel ready to meet your soul twin. Once you do, your awakening will begin and although the journey’s blessings will be abundant, it is also a difficult path.

Start by concentrating on what it would be like to meet your other half, another “you”, if you will. Imagine the feelings of love and trust surrounding you and focus on navigating these thoughts as you start to sleep at night.

It is possible that your twin flame and you may connect in your dreams.

Be patient in this process. You don’t want to rush any part of your spiritual journey.

2) Raise your vibration

When you choose to live in a “higher vibration”, you are choosing to align yourself with gratitude, love, joy, and positivity.

These affirmations clear mental and spiritual paths for your manifestations to flow with grace and abundance.

In other words, raising your vibration will help to attract your twin flame.

3) Be open to possibilities

It is very possible that you may not connect with your twin flame in this lifetime.

That doesn’t mean that the spiritual work you do now is in vain. You are still preparing your soul for the twin flame connection. And remember, it is your soul, not “you”, that will reap the benefits of this relationship.

So, be open.

Be open to the notion that they may or may not come. Be open to the idea that you may decide you don’t want them in your life if they do come. Be open to the idea that you will likely fall a few times before you rise to your awakening.

The point is, to be free and open to as many experiences as your soul attracts.

4) Recognize you are whole

Something the idea of twin flame labeling often forgets to emphasize is that we are not waiting for our twin flame to “complete” us.

We are whole already.

By cultivating self-love, which is what we do as we choose higher vibrations, we will recognize that we are complete. Our twin flame will just allow us to unblock past traumas and release wounds.

To better understand this concept, Ideapod founder Justin Brown shares a fascinating video of how he went about finding his twin flame.

Can twin flame relationships be toxic?

A common misconception is that your twin flame relationship because it is so intense and often turbulent, is toxic.

This isn’t the case.

Although it may often feel this way, twin flame connections can never truly be toxic. The pain and suffering you may be feeling is necessary and part of your spiritual path.

Twin flames trigger ego and pain, they open trauma wounds and push you towards your limits so that you can begin your awakening.

There are key reasons, however, why you may feel as if your relationship with your twin is toxic.

Reasons Your Twin Flame Relationship May Feel Toxic

Failed RecognitionYour twin flame may not recognize you yet. This will trigger feelings of rejection.
You Reject Your Healing NeedsIf you constantly push against the work you need to do, you will feel as if it is toxic.
False Twin FlameYou may be in a false twin flame relationship which will feel toxic.

Lachlan Brown, the founder of HackSpirit, describes a toxic relationship as:

“…a relationship that has gone sour. When a relationship becomes toxic, every interaction in the relationship can feel wrong or out of place, brimming with negative energy that makes both partners uncomfortable, angry, and disappointed.” 

Even though you may be feeling this way, remember that if this person is your true twin flame, it won’t ever be actually toxic.

Just unpleasant or uncomfortable and a sign that you have more inner work to do.

I’ve met my twin flame. Now what?

So you think you have met your twin flame. Now what do you do?

The truth is, you do nothing really. You just trust the process and commit to doing the inner work.

There will never be a universal confirmation that this person is your twin flame.

You won’t ever be certain if you have released all of your trauma bonds and negative energetic cords.

This person may or may not reunite with you in this lifetime.

You just need to surrender to faith and your own spiritual journey.

Remember, the key takeaway in all of this is that you are entirely complete on your own. And the commitment you have to your own spiritual journey will bring about extraordinary abundance and joy.

Twin flame FAQS

Here are the most common questions about twin flame relationships, and my answers to them.

Can you have more than one twin flame?

While you may have many soulmates in your lifetime, you may only have one true twin flame. Some please may come into your life as false twin flames, but as we are energetically split in half at inception, there can only be one mirror soul.

Is a twin flame someone permanent in your life?

Twin flame relationships can be fleeting. Meaning, they can come and go. As intensely as they arrive, they can leave.

Most twin flame relationships go through a separation phase.

Whether the two reunite at some point, depends on the spiritual growth of each person.

Is a twin flame always a romantic relationship?

A twin flame is not always a romantic partner, but there will undoubtedly be a feeling of deep and profound affection and love.

These connections can be platonic or romantic. The emphasis on love is a spiritual one, not sexual.

Remember, that a twin flame, or mirrored soul, is a reflection of you. The true care and love we have for ourselves, shows up in our twin flame.

Will my twin flame ever come back? 

Yes, your twin flame and your soul will reconnect.

But just not maybe in this lifetime. It really has to do with how quickly you surrender to the inner work that needs to be done.

The purpose of the twin flame dynamic, after all, is not to find your one and only.

Rather, the purpose of the twin flame connection is to unearth the deep inner wounds you have, heal them and go through your spiritual awakening.

What’s the difference between a false twin flame and a true twin flame?

A false twin flame appears to be a true twin flame upon first connection. The relationship may be intense and familiar and you will no doubt feel like you have many things in common.

However, a false twin flame will often abandon you when challenges arise. They may gaslight you or cause you to self-destruct by adding to your insecurities.

True twin flames recognize that hardships are part of your mutual journeys. You will feel supported, even in their absence.

How do I know if I’m in a toxic twin flame relationship?

A true twin flame relationship will never be toxic.

It may and likely will be challenging. You may feel triggered and want to escape and run from the darker parts of you they are reflecting, but it won’t ever be truly toxic.

If the relationship feels toxic, pause and question if you’re just deeply uncomfortable or if this really feels damaging, they may be a false twin flame.

Do same-sex twin flames exist?

Yes!! Twin flames can be same-sex, platonic, and/or romantic. Your twin flame can be your best friend, a relative, or someone you just met.

Recall that the connection between you and your mirrored soul is a deeply spiritual one.

Our spirits have no physical boundaties therefore sex doesn’t need to play a role in twin flame relationshps.

What should I do during my twin flame separation?

Focus on yourself!

Heal, love yourself, and have faith. Choose higher vibrations and learn to let go of the traumas that weigh you down. The traumas that your twin flame helped you to uncover.

If you want your twin flame to return, they will when you are spiritually ready. When you both are spiritually ready.

Will my twin flame complete me?

We’ve all seen that Tom Cruise movie with the famous line “you complete me”. But that’s where we get it all wrong. No other person can complete you. Not even your twin flame.

Your twin flame is a mirrored projection of yourself. Their purpose is to propel you towards deep spiritual growth. Not to complete you.

Here’s the kicker: we are complete and whole entirely on our own.

Putting yourself first

Hey, Lachlan from Hack Spirit here.

What’s your number one goal at the moment?

Is it to buy that car you’ve been saving up for?

To finally start that side-hustle that’ll hopefully help you quit your 9-5 one day?

Or to take the leap and finally ask your partner to move in?

Whatever it is, you’re not going to get there, unless you’ve got a plan.

And even then…plans fail.

But I didn’t write this to you to be the voice of doom and gloom…

No, I’m writing this because I want to help you achieve the goals you’ve set.

I’ve recently been taking part in a workshop called Life Journal created by teacher and career coach Jeanette Brown.

Covering all the basics and more on what’s needed to reach your goals, Jeannette tackles everything from creating habits and new behavior patterns to putting your plans into action.

She doesn’t mess around – this workshop will require effort on your part but that’s the beauty of it – Jeanette has carefully designed it to put YOU in the driving seat of your life.

Click here to find out more about Life Journal.

So…think back to that important goal I asked about at the start of this message.

How much do you want it?

Are you willing to put the effort in to get there?

If so, check out the workshop here.

If you do take part, I’d love to hear how your Life Journey goes!

All the best,
Lachlan

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Written by Robbi King

I’ve fallen down, skinned my knees, and broken my heart to pieces. But I put it back together with grit and gold.

When I’m not sitting in silence, capturing the musings in my head, I am joyfully spending time with my two young boys.

I like to tell stories and look at pretty things.

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