15 traits of a classy man that we can all learn from

Ah, class and elegance – one of the few things in this world a man can’t really buy. The good news is that it’s definitely a characteristic you can cultivate.

The even better news is that the core idea behind it isn’t that hard to grasp.

Being a classy man means one thing: knowing who you are, what you’re capable of, and the ways this affects the people around you.

Confession: I’m not a classy man. But I’ve had the good fortune of knowing a few of them, and here are the traits that they have that I (and you!) can aspire to emulate.

1) Doesn’t Complain… Much

One particularly constant trait I’ve noticed is classy men don’t complain.

Delay in their ride? Shrug.

No more flavor of their favorite ice cream? Meh.

Date’s running a little late? Yawn.

They take things as they are, not as they want them to be.

That being said, they’re also not afraid to complain if something is legitimately worth being bothered about.

Is that date 10 minutes late? Just smile and wave. But two hours? You bet that woman’s not going to get a call back.

2) No Need To Be In Control Of Everything

In a way, this relaxed approach to most things comes from one of the many traits of a classy man: the acceptance that things aren’t always going to be in control, and developments won’t always go their way.

They’ll still put in the effort to get the results that they want, but they’re masters at rolling with the punches if things go south.

So many guys – including me – tend to get a bit tilted or frustrated when things don’t happen according to plan.

Not so much these guys. In fact, it’s highly likely that they already anticipated the eventuality and had a plan in place, because…

3) Always Well-Prepared

Preparation can save you a lot of headaches with most things in life, and it’s something that quite frankly not a lot of men do.

Classy men know that preparation isn’t just essential: it’s also something that they can use to further a situation to their advantage if needed.

That often means you’ll never quite see a classy man’s preparations 100% of the time.

They’ll have it in their back pocket, planned out weeks or even months in advance, and have it on standby, ready to use whenever they need it.

This is also the case when it comes to protecting women. They are well-prepared and always assess dangers and make sure they’re on top of it. If you want to learn about the signs a man is protecting a woman, check out our video below on 5 signs a man is protecting a woman. 

4) Has A Brilliant Sense Of Timing

Being classy isn’t dependent on the situation: but picking the right time and place certainly is.

Classy men have an innate understanding of the situation around them, and that means that their timing is nothing less than impeccable.

Appointments, gifts, surprises, phone calls – you’d be hard-pressed to find a classy man caught out of his element by mistiming something.

They know what their time is like, and the best time to act on it.

5) A Keen Listener And Conversationalist

Classy men are excellent listeners. They’re often the first guys I call when I need advice about something, someone to rant to, or simply want to strike up a conversation.

They have a way of making you feel like what you’re saying is something worth paying attention to, which is a rare quality with most people that you’ll meet every day.

They pay attention and participate in your conversations – they’re not just there to listen while you talk their ear off.

Actively paying attention to details, asking about your perspective, volunteering their own experiences… That’s what makes classy men great people to talk to.

6) They Know Their Sense Of Style

A lot of what I’ve talked about that defines a classy man is more or less about their personality, but don’t get me wrong: you can see what a classy man looks like as well.

They don’t necessarily have to look nouveau riche or black-tie elegant – they’re simply stylish.

That means that they know what makes them look good, and they dress and act appropriately.

It’s a sense of style that’s usually been forged by years of experience, and a little dash of confidence in how they pull off that look.

7) Not Insecure

A classy man knows who they are, and that means being comfortable that they’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea, so to speak.

And they’re fine with this. Insecurity isn’t something that classy men fall prey to.

Instead of seeing it as something to beat themselves up over, it’s a challenge for them to improve or move past.

I’ve always admired how these men can freely admit that they’re not capable of doing something or know a specific thing.

Given the pressure that men can face from other men to appear “alpha” always, it’s a refreshing mindset to have.

8) Has Good Manners

Polite, soft-spoken, tactful: these are some of the many ways you can describe a classy man.

They’re well-behaved and know how to read the room around them, but more importantly, they can also act accordingly.

Their specific “type” of politeness isn’t playing doormat to everyone around them either.

It’s a conscious decision to give people the respect that they deserve, with the humility of not acting like they’re the best guy in the room.

9) They Reserve Or Withhold Judgement

We’re all prone to our own biases and acting on them.

I personally find it very hard to disassociate from what I’ve been raised to think is “proper behavior”, thanks to my conservative upbringing – which can sometimes cause some friction when I’m meeting new people.

However, classy men don’t play into this trope at all.

They’ll have their opinions on things or people, but they’re not going to go out of their way to let it affect how they treat or see them.

Often, they’ll only really judge people after they’re absolutely sure that they have the best measure of their worth.

10) High Standards For Themselves

Classy men are some of the best guys to work with, usually because they believe that standards are nothing less than sacred.

This goes double for the ones that they place on themselves, and I can tell you right now that those standards are pretty high.

It doesn’t matter if it’s in the workplace, personal life, or other situations: classy men know what they expect from themselves and what people expect from them.

And they’ll meet those expectations, come hell or high water.

11) Emotionally Stable

Feelings are tricky. They demand to be felt and can manifest at the most inconvenient of times, and if you handle them wrong, you’re likely to blow up the situation that you’re dealing with at the time.

A lot of this can be attributed to a lack of emotional stability, which means you’re more likely to get carried away by your feelings.

Not so for classy men. They’ll acknowledge feelings, yes – but they’re mature enough to know that there’s a right time and place for them.

12) Picks Their Friends Carefully

I can name a few traits that I have which were rubbed off by friends, and admittedly not all of them are good.

It’s often surprising how much you can get influenced by the people that you hang around with. Classy men understand this well: and will often surround themselves with people that are good for them.
This might be the trait that I want to emulate from these guys the most.

Not only can you avoid potentially toxic scenarios, but you’re far more likely to develop better habits by surrounding yourself with good people.

It’s not about being snobbish about who you hang around with: it’s recognizing that you take on the traits of the people around you.

13) Great At Compromises

Remember when I talked about classy men being all right with things not always being in their control?

That also means that they’re great at compromise.

It’s a trait that can save anyone a lot of time and hassle when dealing with other people, and it’s also a useful perspective to have when dealing with anything new.

And to be clear: a classy man’s idea of compromise never involves a disadvantage to either party.

Rather, they’ll always find the best possible solution that can still benefit everyone involved, even if it’s not always up to the initial expectations.

14) Holds Themselves Accountable For Their Actions

Classy men will never run away from the consequences of the things that they do: either they’ll own up to it or find a way to deal with the consequences.

Accountability is a core component of what gives a man a sense of class – and it’s a trait that’s far too lacking in most people these days.

It’s a trait that I’ve found very useful when it comes to dealing with my own affairs as well, especially to the standards that I keep for myself.

Holding yourself accountable can give you a stable foundation to hold yourself to, which improves the way you tackle life’s unexpected challenges.

15) They Have Fun

Finally, a classy man knows that life doesn’t always have to be serious or lacking in vibrance and personality.

They’re just as likely to crack a joke or find the silliest thing to laugh over.

Having fun is always something that they’ll make time for, and they’ll never undersell how important it is for them to unwind.

Whether it’s a hobby, somewhere to go to, or even food to eat, a classy man understands that it’s important to find and stick to things that you can always enjoy.

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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