8 things you’re better off keeping to yourself, according to psychology

As people, we all value honesty, transparency, and authenticity in our relationships.

However, there’s a fine line between being open and oversharing.

Psychology suggests that certain things are better kept to ourselves.

It’s all about maintaining healthy boundaries and fostering strong relationships.

In this piece, I’ll share with you nine things that you’re better off keeping to yourself.

Not because they’re inherently bad or wrong, but because sharing them may not always serve your best interests.

So, get ready to delve into a topic that we often overlook but plays a significant role in our interpersonal dynamics.

Welcome to “9 things you’re better off keeping to yourself, according to psychology”.

1) Your deepest insecurities

We all have insecurities. They’re a part of being human and they often shape who we are.

But sharing your deepest insecurities with just anyone can sometimes do more harm than good.

When we reveal our insecurities, we open ourselves up to vulnerability.

This isn’t always a bad thing, but it can be if the other person isn’t trustworthy or empathetic.

For example, you might confide in a friend about how you feel inadequate at work. If this friend is supportive, they can provide reassurance and encouragement.

But if they’re not, they might disregard your feelings or even use this information against you later.

According to psychology, it’s wise to only share your deepest insecurities with people who have proven their trustworthiness and empathy. 

2) Past resentments

Holding onto past resentments and grudges can be a burden.

While it’s important to learn from past experiences, it’s equally important not to let them define our present and future relationships.

For instance, you might hold a grudge against an ex-partner for their betrayal.

While it’s perfectly normal to feel hurt, openly expressing this resentment every time relationships come up in conversation can potentially push people away.

It could also show that you’re not completely over your past, which might hinder you from building new, healthy relationships.

Rehashing old wounds often brings negativity into your life and the lives of those around you.

Instead of giving power to past resentments, try focusing on forgiveness and moving forward. 

3) Your good deeds

Helping others and doing good deeds is something we should all strive for.

However, constantly talking about these acts of kindness can sometimes send the wrong message.

When we perform a good deed, it should be out of genuine compassion and empathy, not for recognition or praise.

Telling everyone about how you helped a homeless person or donated to a charity might make you appear as though you’re seeking validation or trying to portray yourself in a certain light.

The people who truly matter will notice your kindness and generosity without you having to broadcast it.

4) Your personal regrets

We all have moments in our lives that we wish we could change, choices we made that now fill us with regret. It’s a natural part of life and growth.

However, constantly sharing these regrets can cast a dark shadow over your current life and potential future.

If you’re always talking about the job you wish you’d taken, the relationship you let go of, or the opportunities you missed, it can paint a picture of a person who is stuck in the past rather than living in the present.

While it’s okay to acknowledge these regrets, dwelling on them and repeatedly sharing them can make it difficult for you to move forward.

Instead of focusing on the “what ifs”, tru focusing on the “what can be”.

5) Criticisms about loved ones

It’s natural to have disagreements or frustrations with the people we love, but airing these grievances publicly is a different matter.

Let me tell you—it can be incredibly damaging.

When you share negative criticisms about your loved ones, it not only impacts their reputation but also your relationship with them.

It can create a sense of mistrust and discomfort, especially if they find out through someone else.

Imagine you’re upset with your sibling and you vent to a mutual friend.

If your sibling were to find out, it could hurt their feelings and strain your relationship.

It’s always healthier and more effective to address the issue directly with the person involved.

6) Financial struggles

Most of us have faced financial struggles at one point or another.

Whether it’s dealing with debt, struggling to make ends meet, or simply trying to save for a rainy day, these issues can be stressful and challenging.

However, constantly sharing these struggles can sometimes create awkwardness or discomfort.

People might feel unsure of how to respond, or they might start to see you differently.

Of course, it’s perfectly okay to seek advice or support from trusted friends or family members.

But regularly discussing financial struggles can make others feel uncomfortable and even burdened.

It’s important to strike a balance between seeking support and maintaining a level of privacy and respect for others’ comfort.

7) Your guilty pleasures

Let’s face it, all of us have those quirky, somewhat embarrassing pleasures that we indulge in when no one is watching.

Maybe you love singing along to cheesy pop songs, or perhaps you have an unhealthy obsession with reality TV shows.

While these guilty pleasures are harmless and can be incredibly fun, they may not always be met with the same enthusiasm by others.

Sharing your love for a teen drama series might earn you some strange looks or playful teasing.

So why not keep these little joys to yourself?

After all, they’re your special escape, your little secret.

And there’s something quite delightful about having a guilty pleasure that only you know about!

8) Constant complaints

We all have bad days, and it’s completely normal to vent and let off some steam.

But there’s a difference between expressing frustration and habitual complaining.

Constantly airing your complaints can be exhausting for those around you.

Nobody enjoys being around a person who always sees the glass half empty.

It not only brings down the mood but can also damage relationships in the long run.

Instead of focusing on the negatives, try to cultivate a positive mindset.

Look for solutions rather than dwelling on problems.

And remember, everyone has their own challenges – continuous complaining can make it seem like you believe your problems are more important than theirs.

It’s tough love, but shifting your perspective can make a world of difference.

Instead of sharing constant complaints, share gratitude and positivity.

Ava Sinclair

Ava Sinclair is a former competitive athlete who transitioned into the world of wellness and mindfulness. Her journey through the highs and lows of competitive sports has given her a unique perspective on resilience and mental toughness. Ava’s writing reflects her belief in the power of small, daily habits to create lasting change.

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