Lucas Graham
If you’ve ever been in a social situation and suddenly felt like you’ve put your foot in your mouth, you’re not alone. We’ve all had those moments where we’ve shared something in public that, in hindsight, probably should have remained private.
Navigating social interactions can be tricky, especially when it comes to deciding what topics are off-limits. According to psychology, there are certain subjects that are best kept under wraps when you’re in a public setting.
This isn’t about censorship or limiting your freedom of speech. It’s about understanding the potential impact of our words on ourselves and others around us.
So, here’s your guide to the 8 things you should never talk about in public.
Trust me, it’ll save you some blushes and awkward moments next time you’re at a social gathering.
1) Personal drama
We all have our ups and downs, and it’s natural to want to vent or seek advice. But when you’re in public, airing out your personal drama can make others uncomfortable.
Psychology tells us that sharing intimate details of your life, especially negative ones, can create an awkward dynamic. It puts people in a difficult position, especially if they don’t know you very well or if they are not in a position to help or provide advice.
Public spaces generally aren’t the best places for this level of disclosure. It’s not just about the potential discomfort of others, but also about preserving your own privacy and emotional health.
Ultimately, not everyone in public has your best interest at heart. Some may use the information you share against you, while others may form judgments based on what they hear.
Next time you’re tempted to discuss your latest feud with your sister or the fight you had with your partner, hold back. Save those conversations for trusted friends or family members in a private setting. It’s not just good manners, it’s also good for your mental wellbeing.
2) Your accomplishments
Surprising, right? While it’s important to be proud of your achievements, discussing them in public can sometimes have unintended consequences.
Psychology explains that constantly talking about your own accomplishments can be perceived as boasting or seeking validation. This could make others feel inferior or uncomfortable, which is not the impression you want to leave.
Moreover, it can also create a sense of pressure and expectation. You might feel the need to maintain a certain image or continuously achieve more, which can be stressful.
There’s a difference between sharing good news and repeatedly bringing up your achievements. Of course, if someone asks about your recent promotion or the marathon you just ran, feel free to share! But try not to let these topics dominate the conversation.
Humility is a virtue that’s appreciated in almost every culture. It’s great to celebrate your successes, but it’s also important to listen and show interest in others.
3) Controversial topics
Ever heard the saying, “Never discuss politics or religion in polite company”? There’s wisdom in those words. These subjects often ignite strong emotions and can easily lead to heated debates.
When such topics are brought up in public, especially in a diverse crowd, there’s a high likelihood of clashing beliefs. This can create tension and turn a pleasant gathering into an uncomfortable situation.
Even though open discussion is crucial for societal progress, context and setting matter. Some conversations are better suited for one-on-one discussions or specific forums dedicated to such debates.
Interestingly, our brains are wired to defend our beliefs as we would defend ourselves from physical threats. This is why discussions about deeply held beliefs can escalate quickly. So next time you’re in public, steer clear of hot-button issues to maintain a harmonious environment.
4) Criticism of others
We all have moments when we feel frustrated or disappointed by the actions of others. It’s human nature. But sharing these feelings in public, especially in a negative or derogatory way, can quickly sour the atmosphere.
Imagine being on the receiving end of such comments – it wouldn’t feel good, would it? Everyone is fighting their own battles, and what may seem like a harmless comment to you could deeply hurt someone else.
Besides, criticizing others often says more about us than the person we’re talking about. It can reveal our own insecurities and biases.
Instead, let’s try to cultivate understanding and compassion. If you find yourself wanting to criticize someone in public, take a moment to consider their perspective. Maybe there’s a reason for their behavior that you’re unaware of.
And if you still have concerns, consider addressing them privately and constructively with the person involved.
Kindness is contagious. By spreading positivity and understanding, we can make our public spaces more enjoyable for everyone.
5) Money matters
Let’s face it, we’ve all been in that awkward situation where someone brings up their salary, rent, or the cost of their new car.
Money matters are a universal part of life, but discussing them in public can lead to uncomfortable situations.
Discussing personal finances can create disparities, envy, or even resentment among individuals. One person’s casual comment about their high earnings or expensive purchases can be someone else’s source of stress or insecurity.
Plus, there’s an element of privacy that comes with financial matters. Just as you wouldn’t want someone prying into your bank account, it’s equally inappropriate to delve into others’ financial details.
When you try to avoid the money talk next time, consider this: There are plenty of other interesting topics to discuss that won’t risk making anyone feel uncomfortable or judged.
6) Health issues
While it’s important to be open about health and wellness, sharing specific details about your personal health issues, or those of others, in public isn’t always the best approach.
I remember a time when I was at a dinner party and a guest started talking about their recent surgery in graphic detail. It made everyone uncomfortable and definitely put a damper on the evening.
Besides the potential discomfort it can cause others, discussing personal health issues publicly can also compromise privacy. It’s one thing to share that you’re not feeling well or recovering from an illness, but providing intricate details can cross boundaries.
Respecting your own privacy and the comfort of others is crucial. If you need to talk about health-related issues, consider doing so in a more private setting or with people you trust. Health matters are personal, and it’s okay to keep them that way.
7) Gossip
We’ve all been there, right? A juicy piece of gossip comes our way, and it’s tempting to pass it along. But let’s cut straight to the point here: gossiping is not a good look.
Sharing rumors or personal details about others in public isn’t just inappropriate, it’s also harmful. It can hurt reputations, damage relationships, and create a toxic environment. Moreover, it reflects poorly on you.
We’re all better than this. If you’re tempted to gossip, try to resist the urge. Ask yourself: Would I want someone sharing this information about me? Chances are, the answer is no.
Let’s strive to lift each other up, not bring each other down. Next time you’re in a social setting, focus on positive conversation topics that build connections rather than break them. You’ll be glad you did.
8) Negative self-talk
Lastly, but most importantly, avoid negative self-talk in public. Expressing self-doubt or constantly putting yourself down can make those around you uncomfortable and also adversely affect your own self-esteem.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of self-deprecation, especially when we’re trying to fit in or appear humble. The way you talk about yourself influences how others perceive you, and more importantly, how you perceive yourself.
Your words have power. When you speak kindly and confidently about yourself, it not only boosts your own morale but also encourages a positive environment.
Next time you find yourself slipping into negative self-talk in public, take a step back. Replace those harsh words with kindness and patience. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, and that’s what makes us human.
In conclusion, keep conversations light, respectful, and positive when in public settings. It will make your interactions more enjoyable and fruitful for everyone involved.
Final thoughts
Having mindful and respectful conversations is a skill that enhances our interactions with others—and it’s often about knowing what not to say as much as what to say.
This article has outlined some topics that are generally best avoided in public, according to psychology.
But these are just guidelines, not hard and fast rules. The context, the company you’re in, and your own comfort levels also play a role in shaping your conversations.
In the end, what matters is fostering positive and meaningful connections with others. This often means being considerate about the topics you bring up in public and how they might affect those around you.
Conversing thoughtfully isn’t about suppressing your voice or opinions. It’s about creating a space where everyone feels comfortable and respected.
