9 things you should never share with your boss (if you want to keep your job)

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No matter how close you think you are with your boss, things can turn sour in an instant if you say the wrong thing.

It’s easy to forget that your boss is your boss, especially if you’re new to the workplace or have been working for a company for many, many years.

Let’s explore the 9 things you should never share with your boss if you want to keep your job!

1) How much you hate your co-workers

No matter how awful your colleagues are, never talk trash about them to your boss.

They simply don’t want to hear it. Since your boss hired you and your co-workers, chances are, they like everyone (or most people, at least) in their team.

Hearing you talk badly about them will rub them up the wrong way, especially if they like the people you’re talking badly about.

It can make them think you’re the problem (even if you’re not) and that you’re not a team player. It can even influence their development decisions.

Like if they’re looking at who to send on a business getaway, to a big meeting, or on a limited-space training course, they might not pick you because they know you don’t get on with someone else in the team.

Likewise, exchanging gossip about your co-workers can make them question what you say about them behind their back, too.

2) That you dislike your job

This should be a given, but never tell your boss that you hate your job.

If your boss knows this, they’ll almost certainly treat you differently for it.

They won’t take your future at the company seriously, they won’t invest in you, and they certainly won’t consider you for any upcoming opportunities over other people.

It can also make you the first to go should layoffs be looming, since, in their eyes, you already want to leave!

3) That you’re thinking about leaving

Unless there’s a strategic reason for doing so, it’s never a good idea to tell your boss you’re thinking about leaving.

Whether consciously or not, every boss will treat you differently from the moment you tell them you’re leaving – and not in a good way.

They’ll stop investing in you, giving you good work, sending you on work trips, and/or supporting you as much as they do other employees.

Research by FlexJobs shows that it takes between 3-6 months, on average, to find a new job.

That’s a long time to be missing out on training, new work opportunities, and good support from your boss.

Plus, it can work against you if you decide not to leave after telling them you were.

A boss won’t forget that you were unhappy at one point and wanted to leave, and they’ll continue to treat you differently for a long time.

4) Too much detail about your personal life

No matter how well you get along with your boss, never tell them too much information about your personal life.

That includes things like your dating habits, family drama, relationship issues, and wild weekend activities.

Of course, building a good rapport with your boss and telling them your interests can be beneficial for your career.

But it’s important to be selective about what you tell them and how much detail you offer.

Sharing in-depth stories about your marital issues or family drama can make them concerned about your ability to work, even if these issues seem small to you.

After all, studies have shown that the quality of family relationships can impact your overall health, well-being, and stress levels.

Plus, it’s just not a good idea for your boss to know that you’re sleeping your way through the dating apps or what the latest argument with your parents is about.

When sharing personal things with your boss, stick to the stories that make you look good.

Like that you’ve started a new hobby or are visiting your sick grandma at the weekend.

Not that you decided to steal a shopping cart for a joyride at the weekend or attended a rave for the first time.

5) Your social media handles

Social media is becoming a “big issue” for many employers and employees.

In fact, new research shows that almost 50% of employers check their employee’s social media accounts to see what they’re posting.

More than 30% of employers have also fired or reprimanded an employee based on the content they found online.

In today’s world, we should all be mindful of how the things we post on social media can affect our employers and therefore our jobs.

Unless your accounts are private, don’t make it easy for your boss to find you on social media by telling them your handles.

Likewise, don’t ever accept your boss as a friend or follower on social media. No matter how well you think you get along, they’re still your boss.

And them having access to your weekend or day-off activities is just not a good idea.

6) Lies you told (to whoever, whenever)

Another thing to avoid at all costs is any personal anecdotes that involve you telling lies, no matter how big or small they are.

When your boss trusts you, everyday life at work is so much easier. They let you get on with things without micromanaging you.

They also believe you if you have to leave early for a personal emergency.

But if you start telling them stories of lies you’ve told your family, friends, co-workers, or ex-partners, it can make them question your character.

And once your boss loses trust in you, it can be very, very difficult to get it back.

7) Which sporting teams you support

Many people talk about their sports teams to build rapport with their colleagues. But it’s often best to avoid these topics with your boss.

While it can be favorable if your boss has good humor, it can also become a hindrance to your career.

Some people take sports seriously and get emotional when their teams lose.

You may be able to get away with teasing your coworkers about their team losing against yours. But your boss likely won’t take too kindly to this.

It can make them unnecessarily irritated with you and cause them to snap without good reason.

Likewise, it can also promote an unconscious bias in your boss’s eyes.

They may want to avoid you on certain days if their team loses, or be less inclined to offer you the in-work benefit over someone else.

Sporting events are an emotional subject, and sometimes it’s best to simply stay out of it.

8) That you don’t get paid enough

Asking for a pay rise is something everyone should do at some point in their career if they want to earn more money.

Especially considering that new research finds that almost 50% of US adults believe they are underpaid for the work they do (and are probably right).

However, negotiating your salary is something that should be raised carefully and considerately if you want to be taken seriously.

It’s not something that should be joked about, complained about, or raised in jest – especially not with your boss.

It can make the subject a laughing matter, rather than something that requires genuine consideration and a professional response.

9) Your intentions to take their job someday

Showing willingness to progress in a company shows determination, which can lead to better training and opportunities coming your way.

However, use caution when talking about your career progression plans.

Don’t flaunt the fact that you want to climb the ladder and take over your boss’s job one day.

No one likes to feel threatened, especially a new manager or someone that’s been sitting in the position comfortably for many years.

While it’s not right and it shouldn’t happen, a bad boss will use this knowledge to sabotage your career and prevent you from doing better than they are.

If you suspect your boss is this way inclined, keep your progression plans to yourself.

If you’re unsure, make it clear you want to work hard and stick around the company, without directly threatening to take their job someday.

Final thoughts

Some things should just never be said in the workplace, especially to your boss.

While some managers are more flexible and lenient than others, most won’t be so understanding if you’re too open about your slightly questionable personal antics.

Judge the situation carefully before doing any of these things, or just avoid them altogether, if you want to keep your job.

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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