12 things you should never sacrifice for a relationship, no matter what

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Being in love can be a magical experience.

Often, especially at the beginning of a relationship, it feels like all you need is love and each other.

And that’s where things go wrong a lot of the time…

While it’s one thing to make compromises in a relationship, it’s quite another to sacrifice things that really matter.

Blinded by love and happy to finally be in a relationship, people often end up renouncing things that are equally important (if not more) to the relationship.

So, what are the things you should never sacrifice for a relationship?

Let’s take a look:

1) Freedom

Listen up: Your life belongs to you and once you turn 18, it’s up to you to decide what you’re going to do with it.

It’s super important not to forget that once you’re in a relationship, you should never let the other person tell you what to do or dictate your life.

Sadly, I’ve seen it happen all too many times. People let their partners tell them how they should spend their time and who they should spend it with.

But it really shouldn’t be their decision to make, you know?

2) Relationships with friends and family

There’s no shortage of controlling partners out there!

If they don’t like a particular friend, they’ll start to criticize them, saying things like, “I can’t believe you’re still friends with that loser, you are so much better than him!”

And if they’re jealous of the time you spend with your family, they could say something along the lines of, “You prefer to have lunch with your mom than with me” and then they’ll sulk and make you feel guilty.

And the result?

They make you feel like you have to choose between them and your other relationships.

But you should never have to sacrifice people you love for a relationship, and if someone asks that of you, frankly, you’re not with the right person.  

3) Who you are

How many people do you know that have changed since they got into a relationship?

They may not even be aware of it, but little by little, their partner has transformed them into another person.

You can probably guess where I’m going with this… NEVER EVER let someone change you!

Sure, you’re not perfect, you have your quirks and your bad habits. But everyone does, nobody is perfect.

And if your partner is looking for something different, then they should find someone else to date, right?

The bottom line is that you should be in a relationship with someone who likes you as you are, faults and all, and you should never sacrifice your concept of “self” for anyone.

Got it?

4) Core values and beliefs

Well, if you think about it, your core values and beliefs are part of who you are.

So if the person you’re dating tries to change your core values and beliefs – whether they be religious, ethical, moral, or personal principles – they’re basically trying to change who you are.

If you’re tempted to give in for the sake of the relationship, ask yourself, “Why are they in a relationship with me if they want me to sacrifice my core self for them?”

Anyone capable of doing that doesn’t truly love you, do they?

5) Hopes and dreams

We all have our hopes and dreams. To some, they may seem silly or eccentric, but they’re ours.

Maybe your dream is to achieve something that seems very far-fetched and your partner tells you “Grow up” or “Don’t be ridiculous, let go of that silly dream already.”

Don’t listen!

Here’s why: Maybe you’ll make your dream into a reality and maybe you’ll fail and realize that it’s not really possible, but you’ll never know until you try. And the only person that can decide what you should do with your hopes and dreams is you.

The bottom line?

Never let anyone sh** on your dreams, do you hear me?

6) Happiness

I can’t believe I actually have to tell you this but you should never sacrifice your happiness for a relationship!

For goodness sake, just think about it: What’s the point of a relationship if it doesn’t make you happy?

Trust me, it’s better to be alone than to be with someone who doesn’t make you happy, or worse, makes you miserable!

7) Independence

I mentioned freedom earlier, and yes, freedom and independence do go hand-in-hand.

But when I talk about independence here, I’m not just talking about not letting your partner control you, I’m also talking about not becoming codependent, and often, that could be all you.

What happens in a codependent relationship is that one or both partners become excessively dependent on their partner.

For example, if you’re codependent, you’ll have a hard time making decisions by yourself or engaging in any sort of activity without your partner and that’s not healthy!

Be in love but don’t forget that you exist outside the relationship and your relationship doesn’t define you, okay?

8) Making decisions

When I hear people letting their partner order for them in a restaurant it makes me sick.

Or when I ask my friend if they want to do something and they have to “ask” permission from their significant other.

Now, I’m not saying that you should act the same way you did when you were single, but for crying out loud, don’t let your partner make all your decisions.

Consult them sure, but ultimately, the decision is yours to make.

9) Boundaries

I’ve got news for you: Being in a relationship doesn’t erase boundaries!

Yup, boundaries are there to stay, no matter what.

Of course, they can change and evolve, but you can’t just get rid of them because your partner doesn’t think you should have any.

  • If you need some time for yourself – take it.
  • If there’s something you don’t want to do or to talk about – you don’t have to!

You see, boundaries are there to protect your mental and physical well-being, and the person you’re dating needs to respect them or date someone else.

10) Life goals

Now, if one of your life goals is to be in a relationship with someone you love and you’ve achieved it, good for you!

But listen up, that doesn’t mean that your other life goals should disappear.

You still have other stuff you want to get done – whether it’s to advance your career or travel the world, you need to keep working toward your goal.

Don’t let the happiness you feel now when you’re freshly in love make you forget about the other stuff that’s important, and don’t let your partner talk you out of it either.

11) Self-love, self-respect, self-esteem

Here’s the truth:

If you’re in a relationship where you have to sacrifice the love, respect, and esteem that you have for yourself, you’re in an unhealthy relationship and you should think about getting out ASAP.

A healthy relationship is all about two people who love and respect each other. They support each other and build each other up, not knock each other down.

Simply put, if you’re with someone who makes you doubt yourself in any way or makes you feel bad about who you are or your abilities, you should be asking yourself, “What do I get out of this relationship?” because you should never have to sacrifice your self-love, self-respect, or self-esteem for anyone.

12) Passions and pursuits

While it’s normal to take an interest in your partner’s hobbies, you should never let go of yours.

So, by all means, go out there and try some new stuff, pick up a few new hobbies, and share your partner’s passion for their hobbies, but don’t sacrifice your own.

Hopefully, your partner will be equally open to giving the things you’re passionate about a try, and if they’re not, or they don’t like them, that’s okay. You can keep pursuing your hobbies without your partner.

Things you should sacrifice for love

So, while there are some things you should never sacrifice for a relationship – things that are inherent to your character – other things are not as important and are okay to let go of.

Read on to find out what you should sacrifice in the name of love!

1) Ego and pride

Look, it’s okay to let go of ego-driven behaviors for the good of your relationship. You don’t always have to be right, you know?

Also, don’t be too proud to admit when you’re wrong, trust me, it makes for healthier communication and relationship dynamics.

2) Small inconveniences

News flash – you’re no longer alone so not everything revolves around you!

It’s okay to make compromises and small sacrifices.

It’s okay to be flexible.

It’s not always easy when two people with separate lives come together – adjustments need to be made, routines changed, and there should be consideration for each other’s needs and preferences.

But it’s worth it, trust me!

3) Selfishness

The truth is that you can’t have everything your way if you want your relationship to work out.

If you love your partner, you need to be willing to put their needs and well-being before your own from time to time.

In other words, it’s okay (heck it’s advisable) to sacrifice selfishness and self-centeredness in the name of love!

4) Comfort zone

Hey, I know it’s not easy for everyone, but stepping out of your comfort zone to engage in activities your partner enjoys is a big deal.

Maybe these things aren’t exactly your cup of tea, but trust me, the fact that you’re willing to give them a try will show your partner how much they mean to you and strengthen your bond.

5) Time

When you’re single, you basically share your time between work and activities of your choosing – they could be spending time with friends, playing video games, or even volunteering at a dog shelter.

But here’s the thing: when you’re in a relationship, you’re gonna have to put some time aside for your partner.

And depending on how busy you are, it could mean sacrificing some of the time you spent on other activities so that you can be with them.

The plus side is that you will enjoy the time you spend with them!

6) Total control

Although I encourage freedom and independence, I also think that it’s important to let go of the need for total control and complete independence.

As we’ve already established, you’re no longer alone, that means you’re gonna have to make some healthy compromises and you’re not gonna be able to control everything that happens.

But that’s okay, it’s a normal part of being in a relationship and with the right person – it’s totally worth it!

Jelena Dincic

Jelena has a background in photography and film-making and has spent the last few years as a content editor and copywriter. Jelena is a citizen of the world who is passionate about travel and learning about new cultures. She’s a foodie who loves to cook. And, as an art lover, she is always experimenting with new art mediums. When she’s not at her computer, she’s usually out and about in some forest with her dogs.

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