6 things you don’t realize you’re doing because you have high emotional intelligence

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Ever wonder why you’re so good at reading people’s emotions? Or why you always know the right thing to say in a tough situation?

You might not realize it, but these could be signs of high emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence can sometimes be a hidden trait. You don’t always know you have it because it’s not something that’s easily quantifiable or visible.

But that doesn’t mean it’s not there, and it doesn’t mean it’s not impacting your life in major ways.

In this piece, we’ll uncover six things you’re doing that may be a direct result of your high emotional intelligence.

Some of these might surprise you. Others may feel like second nature.

Either way, understanding these elements can help you better grasp how your emotional intelligence shapes your interactions and relationships.

Ready to dive in and discover these hidden influences? Let’s get started.

1) You’re a master of empathy

Ever noticed how you can easily step into someone else’s shoes, understanding their feelings and perspectives? That’s not a trait everyone possesses, but it’s a key sign of high emotional intelligence.

I remember a time when a colleague of mine was having a tough day. Everyone else simply told her to “cheer up.” But I sat down with her, listened to her worries, and empathetically acknowledged her feelings.

She later told me how much she appreciated it – that I didn’t just brush her off with a simple “cheer up”, but genuinely understood her emotions. This is what high emotional intelligence looks like in action.

But it’s not only about the emotions of others, it starts from you… 

2) You know how to manage your emotions

Last week, I was stuck in traffic for hours, making me late for an important meeting. Instead of allowing frustration to consume me, I took deep breaths, listened to calming music and reminded myself that there was nothing I could do about the situation.

This ability to manage and control our emotions, especially when things don’t go as planned, is another clear indicator of high emotional intelligence.

We don’t let our emotions rule us; we rule our emotions. And this makes all the difference in how we react and respond to life’s ups and downs.

But there’s one area of our lives where being in control of our emotions is especially important…

3) You’re great at building relationships

Having high emotional intelligence means you’re not just good at understanding your own emotions, but you’re also adept at navigating other people’s feelings.

This makes you particularly skilled at building and maintaining relationships, both in your personal and professional life.

In fact, a study by TalentSmart found that 90% of top performers at work have high emotional intelligence, and a major part of their success can be attributed to their ability to manage, navigate and use emotions in their relationships effectively.

This goes to show that such individuals can influence, engage, and connect with others well, making them valuable assets in any team or relationship.

Another thing that makes such individuals great at building relationship is that they do one thing others often find challenging…

4) You recognize the value of apologizing

It’s not easy to say, “I’m sorry.” It requires swallowing your pride, acknowledging your mistakes, and making amends.

But those with high emotional intelligence understand that an apology isn’t just about admitting a wrong. It’s about valuing relationships more than our ego.

I’ve noticed that when I apologize, it diffuses tension, repairs relationships, and builds trust. It’s a way of saying, “Our relationship is important to me, and I’m willing to own up to my part in any discord.”

This ability to apologize sincerely and take responsibility for our actions is a beautiful manifestation of high emotional intelligence. It shows we care more about people than being right. And in the end, isn’t that what really matters?

And it might be easier for you, as a highly emotional individual to recognize the value of a sincere apology, because you’re not tuned only to your own inner channel…

5) You’re an excellent listener

Listening goes beyond simply hearing what someone is saying. It involves understanding the emotions and intentions behind those words. And if you find yourself doing this quite often, that’s your high emotional intelligence at work.

Take it from me. I’ve always been known as the “go-to” person among my friends and family whenever they’re going through tough times. Why? Because I listen. I don’t just nod along while they talk. I make an effort to really understand what they’re going through, offering comfort and advice when needed.

Being a good listener allows you to connect on a deeper level with others. It’s not just about being quiet while the other person talks, but about showing genuine interest and empathy in what they have to say.

And lastly, a quite unobvious sign of high emotional intelligence…

6) You embrace change

I’ve found that being emotionally intelligent often translates to being flexible and adaptable in the face of change.

I remember when my company decided to shift entirely to remote work due to the pandemic. While many colleagues struggled with this new reality, I saw it as an opportunity for growth and a chance to develop new skills.

Instead of resisting, I embraced the change. I used it as a chance to create a balanced work-from-home routine, which ultimately led to increased productivity and better work-life balance.

This ability to not just accept but thrive in changing circumstances is a testament to having high emotional intelligence. It showcases our ability to manage our emotions effectively and adapt to whatever life throws at us.

In conclusion

Having high emotional intelligence is more than just being “smart” with your feelings. It’s about empathy, managing emotions, building strong relationships, valuing the act of apologizing, embracing change, and being a good listener.

If you find yourself nodding along to these points, chances are you possess a higher level of emotional intelligence than you realize. And that is something truly worth acknowledging and celebrating.

Because at the end of the day, it’s these traits that make us better friends, colleagues, leaders, and human beings.

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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