Pearl Nash
What makes a strong woman strong?
Often it’s an underlying confidence that she has built over time.
This helps her to stay emotionally strong and show resilience, even in the most challenging situations.
She has developed certain habits that not only show her strength but also feed back into it.
Yet these are often unassuming traits and behaviors, that she may not even think about anymore.
These are the things that strong women do every day, without even realizing it…
1) Mind their own business
Rather than getting absorbed in other people’s lives, strong women stay focused on their own.
This means that they stay in their own lane, instead of judging others or interfering in things that are none of their business.
Let’s face it, this makes it a lot easier to avoid unnecessary drama.
But significantly they also aren’t tempted to compare their lives with other people.
And this plays a really important part in keeping them strong.
Because when we unfairly measure ourselves against what someone else has, does, looks like, or feels, we usually find ourselves wanting.
Strong women live their lives minding their business. They only compare themselves to the person they once were, and nobody else.
2) Cut themselves some slack
You might be surprised to hear that strong women go easy on themselves.
But I’m not suggesting they don’t have high standards, or even push themselves in plenty of ways.
What I’m referring to is dropping perfectionist standards that only hold you back. I mean cutting yourself some slack by practicing radical self-acceptance.
Because real strength is being able to handle imperfection.
It means being able to accept your own weaknesses and flaws.
When we can face the truth and know that it’s ok to be human, something powerful happens.
We redirect all that wasted energy we spent beating ourselves up into more constructive outlets.
We can find the strength to improve and work on ourselves, but simultaneously gain confidence by accepting that nobody is perfect.
3) Set a good example
Strong women probably don’t even notice the positive influence they are having on those around them.
But no doubt they are.
Through their own strength, they lead by example.
They live by their values, are principled, and stay true to themselves.
As Gandhi famously put it:
“Be the change you want to see in the world.”
By having their shit together and doing right in the world, a strong woman, without even realizing it, is being a positive role model.
4) Express their independence
Here’s the thing about independence:
That doesn’t mean never asking for help or being able to delegate.
It’s simply about having enough faith in yourself to enjoy your freedom and self-sufficiency too.
A strong woman might display independence of thought, by refusing to follow the crowd and giving her opinions freely.
She may display independence through her behavior, by striving to take responsibility and get things done for herself.
On a daily basis, a strong woman doesn’t rely on others for her emotional, financial, mental, or physical needs.
Without giving it much thought, she takes total responsibility for her own well-being.
5) Build other people up rather than tearing them down
Sadly, there can be a misleading image of what strength is that still prevails in society.
It’s the hungry ‘Wolf of Wall Street’ stereotype. Someone who is willing to tear down anyone who gets in their way.
But the reality is that there is so much strength (and success) to be found in caring.
Not only has it been shown to help build better relationships, kindness makes you more attractive, can make businesses more successful, and might even help you to live longer.
Strong women use their strength to help support others too.
That could be through the simple act of extending kindness and compassion. It could be through offering their time, energy, or skills to others.
But truly strong women prefer to build up rather than tear down.
6) Feed their thirst for knowledge
I said in the introduction to this article that strong women build their strength.
One of the ways they do this is by learning.
This can happen in some of the most unassuming ways every single day.
It might be fitting in a quick chapter of a book she is reading before bedtime.
It could be asking lots of questions in the morning meeting at work.
It may be researching a topic she finds fascinating with the help of a quick Google search.
Because it’s far more about cultivating an inquisitive spirit than it is about formal education.
As they say, knowledge is power and a strong woman wants as much of it as possible in order to grow.
7) Support their body so it can support them
As much as I’m sure we’d like to, the reality is that very few of us manage to take the “my body is a temple” approach to self-care.
Less than one in four of us fit in the weekly recommended amount of exercise. Apparently one in three of us drink excessively. And almost half of us have what experts say is a poor-quality diet.
The reality is that mental strength and physical strength are related.
There’s countless research on the benefits of a better diet and exercise for your mental well-being.
Studies show it reduces anxiety, depression, and negative mood, as well as improves self-esteem and cognitive function.
Strong women aim to support their bodies as much as possible.
That could be as simple as getting a good night’s sleep. By being more mindful of what they’re eating. Or building little daily habits that encourage fitness — like taking the stairs instead of the elevator.
8) She uses her voice to express herself
The sad reality is that throughout history the female voice has been muted.
Having been suppressed and subdued for so long, many of us women still find it challenging to speak up for ourselves.
We can worry about looking “bossy”, and we may fear the judgment of others.
We might think that saying “no” to someone or something will leave us looking disagreeable. And so we might find ourselves going along with certain things, simply to keep the peace.
Sometimes we’re concerned about the potential fallout of saying how we really feel and what we really think.
Whilst there’s a lot to be said for us all becoming more conscious of our words, strong women don’t shy away from using their voices.
That might be speaking out about wrongdoing that they see. Or it could be in making their own needs and wants known.
We should never underestimate the courage that self-expression takes.
9) Push their comfort zone
Earlier, I spoke of how strong women cut themselves slack.
Whilst they don’t place unfair pressure on themselves, that certainly doesn’t mean they let themselves off the hook.
Quite the opposite, strong women are experts at subtly pushing their comfort zone. They do in so many small ways, they often don’t even recognize it anymore.
It could be adding an extra kilometer to the daily run. It might be trying out a new hobby or activity. Or perhaps by saying yes to an opportunity that deep down you’re nervous about accepting.
When strong women feel the natural fear that comes along with anything unfamiliar, they push through it.
In this way, they manage to build their confidence and resilience, which makes them even stronger for the next challenge that comes their way.
10) They call out their own BS
We’ve already mentioned how feeding your body the right fuel (through diet and exercise) helps make you stronger. Well, feeding your mind the right fuel is equally important.
Negative self-chat and an overactive inner critic only weaken us.
I’m talking about all those self-deprecating comments our brain automatically throws our way on a daily basis.
But strong women have learned to see them for the BS that they are.
Rather than allow them to go unchecked or taken as fact, she stops them in their tracks.
She questions her negative thoughts, finds examples to prove those thoughts wrong, and strives to turn them around.
She chooses to feed herself with kind and loving words of encouragement.
