8 things empaths wish you knew about them  

The life of an empath is like walking through dozens of rainbows each time you leave your house.

The emotions of everyone around you are as colorful as they come – anger, grief, joy, stillness, and peace…they all shift and blend, clinging to your skin as you go through your day.

Empaths feel a hell of a lot.

This means that being friends with or dating an empath comes with its own set of invisible rules.

Luckily for you, I’ve got them all written down.

Here are the 8 things empaths wish you knew about them.

1) They have a hard time establishing emotional boundaries

I’m a huge empath.

When you’re stressed, I’m stressed. When you’re screaming from the rooftops because of how happy you are, I’ll gladly join you. Irritated people set me on edge.

Since empaths essentially feel too much empathy for every living thing in a 5-mile perimeter (and don’t even get me started on social media), they easily take on your emotions, vibing on the same wavelength as you.

While the keen awareness of others’ emotional energies is an amazing superpower – I love being an empath – it comes with its own mishaps.

We’re like a sponge for negativity. If you trauma dump or complain for two hours straight, we’ll listen, feel those emotions with you, and then carry that heaviness for days, if not weeks.

Be gentle with us. If you’re about to share something deeply upsetting, ask your empathetic friend if it’s okay. They’ll be grateful. Trust me.

2) We can’t stand the news

Sigh.

I love globalization, but sometimes, it sucks knowing every bad thing that’s happened on planet Earth today.

The internet throws news about violence upon violence on us on a daily basis, begging us to cry and sigh and shake our heads in disapproval.

“Oh no! Wow! Oh my! How horrible!”

I get it, okay? The world’s a cruel place. As someone who feels very deeply, the cruelty can drive me mad, sending me into an existential spiral.

This is also why many empaths don’t eat meat – they see one video of animal cruelty and swear off animal products for life. I’m speaking from personal experience. I watched a few documentaries at seventeen, and it’s now been seven years since I last touched meat.

All that to say, don’t force empaths to watch the news. If they say they don’t want to hear about a certain issue, respect their wishes.

3) Their emotional universe is a hurricane

Empaths live highly emotional lives.

On any given day, I wake up with at least four conflicting emotions pulling me in different directions.

I’m worried about the broken dishwasher. I’m excited about the work day ahead. I’m sad because I miss my partner. I’m pleasantly surprised the weather’s so good (for context – I live in Scotland).

My mind’s a merry-go-round that just keeps on spinning.

Add other people’s feelings into the mix, and you’ve got an emotional hurricane.

If your empathetic friend’s often moody, there’s a reason for it. Handling so many feelings at once and remaining a functional human being isn’t always easy.

4) They get easily overwhelmed in social situations

The constant onslaught of feelings can get… a bit much, to say the least.

Especially if you’re an empath and an introvert and have spent the last two hours at a crowded party.

I know I’m not the only one when I say I use toilet breaks to recharge my batteries more than anything else. That simple moment of peace is everything.

Does your friend leave parties early? Do they like to hang out a bit further from the crowd?

Chances are, they’re introverted empaths. My best piece of advice is to enjoy the time you have with them and let them go once their batteries run out.

Sometimes, empaths need a little bit of time to themselves.

5) They enjoy having some well-deserved alone time

According to research, solitude promotes “low-arousal” affective states. This means you’re more likely to feel calm and relaxed rather than excited, as well as bored and lonely rather than angry.

See why empaths love it so much?

Solitude gives them the space to bring their mind space back to a more neutral state. As they’re free to unpack which emotional layers belong to them and which are solely an effect of other people’s presence, their nervous system calms down, letting them fully relax.

And if you want to make your empath happy, take them on a quiet walk in nature. It’s an excellent way to improve emotional self-regulation and decompress.

6) They’re the best audience you could have wished for

Out of all the empaths I know, there’s not one who doesn’t love storytelling.

Stories – be it books, movies, theatre plays, or just chatting over coffee – are an opportunity for empaths to fully engulf themselves in another universe.

We root for characters as if they were our best friends. We get so invested in a good story that it stays with us for months or years, changing our perception of the world.

But fiction isn’t the only realm we love to enter. We’re suckers for real-life stories, too. Oh, you went on a girls’ trip to Spain last week? Tell me all about it!

I want to hear every detail. Every turn of events. She did what?! How did that made you feel? Wow, that’s insane!

I’ll follow your paths of thinking, letting you take me on little detours before we return back to the main plot. I’ll gasp and nod enthusiastically and give you 110% of my attention.

Thus the magic of being friends with an empath.

7) Their intuitive voice is unusually loud

They’ll know something’s wrong before you even open your mouth. Oh, and that new guy you’re friends with? Something’s fishy about him. They just can’t put their finger on it.

Empaths are not only great listeners, but they’re also very good judges of character. This is because we soak up so much emotional energy from our environment that we can see beyond pure logic.

We often rely on our gut instinct to guide us in our decisions because we know it’s almost always right.

Of course, listening only to your intuition isn’t ideal. Researchers say that empathic accuracy is higher when you combine intuition with systemic and methodological thinking.

Still, though. It’s good to know you have someone who can provide emotionally based counsel when needed.

8) They can give a little too much

Giving advice is only one of the many ways in which empaths try to help out when they see something’s wrong.

Since we easily put ourselves into the shoes of others, we’re not immune to doing a little too much just to make things better.

No wonder so many empaths end up working as volunteers! We love to ease wounds, lift people’s spirits, and do our best at making the world a better place.

But emotions can also blind us if we’re not careful. Some empaths sacrifice their own well-being in order to take care of others, foregoing their needs and driving themselves to emotional exhaustion.

It’s not great.

If you’re friends with an empath who always prioritizes others’ wants and needs, my last piece of advice is to grab them by the shoulders, look them in the eyes, and say:

“Stop. Take a break. Be kind to yourself.”

Sometimes, that’s all an empath needs to hear.

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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