When we were younger and in school, we always thought being “cool” meant hanging out with the popular kids and owning the latest gadgets.
But as we grew older, we realized that being cool has less to do with material things and more to do with how to treat the people around you. Like beauty, coolness is often in the eyes of the beholder.
It’s hard to pin down and point out exactly what makes a person cool, but some things and behaviors are just “uncool” no matter how anyone looks at them.
Here are some of the things that you’ll never see cool people do:
1) They Don’t Try Hard to Seem Cool
Cool people never have to try hard to look cool in front of others – they don’t even care if they’re cool or not.
They’re confident and comfortable enough in their own skin, so they don’t bother themselves with doing something just because someone said it was “cool.”
A cool person is just effortlessly cool because it’s something you can’t easily fake.
As soon as someone puts in a lot of effort and tries hard to appear cool, that’s exactly when they start being “uncool.”
People can always tell when someone fights against their own quirkiness instead of embracing it.
A cool person never pretends to be someone they’re not just to impress others because they’re already satisfied with their true selves and everything they do.
2) They Don’t Blindly Follow Trends
Some people think coolness has something to do with following the trends, but that’s not always the case.
Cool people don’t just blindly follow the craze when it comes to fashion or technology – they still check everything to see if it’s really up to their standards before wearing or using something.
But that’s not to say that cool people aren’t fashionable or tech-savvy.
They can still keep up with some of the latest trends, but their reasons for doing so are their own and not because someone on the internet said it was cool.
Cool people buy things they like, regardless if they’re trendy or not. They go to places where they enjoy the vibe, not because it’s where celebrities or other “cool people” go.
Most of the time, it’s actually these effortlessly cool people that set the trends just by being their genuine selves and picking their preferences.
3) They Don’t Waste Time Impressing Other People
Cool people don’t need validation from others to feel good about themselves.
Sure, they appreciate it when people are drawn to them, but they don’t base their entire sense of self on external validation.
They don’t feel the need to boast about their achievements or put others down to boost their own ego.
Rather than seeking approval from others, cool people focus on being their best selves. They’re too busy working on themselves to worry about what others think.
They’re happy with who they are and appreciate it when others like them for who they are.
If someone doesn’t appreciate them, that’s not their problem. They don’t waste their time trying to impress people who don’t matter to them.
In fact, they make it a goal to avoid people who don’t add value to their lives.
4) They Don’t Brag About Their Lives on Social Media
Since cool people don’t feel the need to impress others, it’s normal to see that they’re quiet on social media.
When they post about something, it’s because they just simply want to share it with people instead of bragging about what they have, what they do, or where they are.
They might have accounts on Instagram, Facebook, and other social media sites, but they don’t post too often.
When they do, it’s simply because they find that post funny or interesting and want to share it with their online friends.
The number of likes, followers, and shares doesn’t mean a lot for a cool person, so they don’t waste hours on social media apps just to refresh the page every 5 minutes.
They don’t obsess with their posts or how many people deemed them worthy of any attention.
5) They Don’t Force Others to Live the Way They Do
Just because they’re the “cool” person in a group doesn’t mean they’re entitled to dictate what everyone else should do.
A genuinely cool person never forces their way of life on their friends and other people – nor do they belittle other people’s suggestions just to get their way.
For example, if someone from their friend group suggests having a game night then they will enthusiastically agree – especially if they think it’s an activity that they can enjoy as a group.
They won’t force their idea of going to an art exhibit instead if they’re the only one who enjoys that kind of hobby – they can always visit the museum or gallery whenever they want anyway.
A cool person always has an open mind to welcome suggestions from other people.
They have their own wants and preferences, but they don’t feel the need to become the ringleader of their own friend group.
6) They Don’t Exclude or Judge Other People
Cool people never tolerate toxic and negative behavior from others, but they won’t gatekeep whatever they’re doing.
They don’t exclude other people who show interest in their activities and want to try the same thing – a cool person might even encourage them to join because some activities are better with more people.
Since cool people know that everyone lives differently and has their own quirks and habits, they do their best to accept and embrace these differences.
Their curiosity still pushes them to get to know other people instead of shunning them for their oddities.
A cool person might not always agree with the opinion of others, but they don’t necessarily deem the other person inferior or wrong because of it.
They respect other people’s beliefs and opinions, as long as it doesn’t harm anyone else.
7) They Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously
Cool people are always fun to be around – and one of the main reasons why is that they don’t care what others think of them.
They’re willing to put themselves out there and do something fun and goofy just for the joy of it.
They don’t mind laughing at themselves and their antics whenever they act silly – it can even defuse any awkwardness within the group.
Cool people don’t have many insecurities so they can act with a carefree attitude whenever they want to. It’s what makes them resilient to the ups and downs they experience in life.
Personally, I like cracking jokes and telling funny stories to someone I just met. I noticed that it makes them warm up to me and my friends more quickly.
But whenever I tell stories to new people, I always make sure that it’s lighthearted and wholesome – I always try to be conscious of my friend’s triggers and insecurities so everyone can laugh and have a good time.
8) They Don’t Isolate Themselves to Their Comfort Zone
Having healthy amounts of self-confidence and self-esteem is something common among many cool people.
Their confidence and comfort in their own skin allow them to always try new things outside of their comfort zone.
They don’t let fear of the unknown stop them from exploring unfamiliar things – in fact, they’re always happy and excited to do so.
They understand that taking risks and putting themselves out there are essential parts of life.
Cool people don’t let the knowledge of making a mistake or failing get in their way because they believe that these mishaps aren’t the end of the world – they’re only a possible outcome of what could be an awesome and unique experience.
In the end, cool people are always curious about what life has to offer so they always try to reach out – even if it involves some discomfort or difficulty.
They would rather experience life to its fullest than remain wrapped up in their comfort zone without flavor, variety, or excitement.
9) They Don’t Place Too Much Value on Material Things
Even cool people can own a lot of stuff, but that doesn’t mean they’re always overly important.
When they keep small things in their home, it’s most likely because it holds a special meaning or sentimental value to them.
They might have the latest phones or the shiniest jewels, but they don’t necessarily see those things as something overly important.
For them, it’s almost always functionality and comfort over style and a high price tag.
They appreciate nice things that can improve their life or make them enjoyable, but they don’t live in fear that things might get broken or taken.
Other cool people might even actively try to minimize the number of stuff and trinkets they own. They don’t see material things as something as important as life experiences or memories with friends and family.
10) They Don’t Let Life Faze Them
Life can be a little too difficult for everyone sometimes, but a cool person always manages to rise above their struggles.
It’s rare to see them speechless or in a fit of rage because they always try to keep a clear head when faced with challenges.
Cool people understand that the flows and ebbs of life can try to knock you down and kick you off the wagon, but they don’t let it bother them.
They recognize the fact that there are some things you can’t control, so it’s best to accept rejection and move on quickly.
They also know when to live actively and when to sit back and go with the flow.
But refusing to let life faze them doesn’t mean a cool person is apathetic – they still care deeply about others. It’s just that they know how to accept what life throws at them, allowing them to find solutions for their problems instead of worrying about them
Lost Your Sense of Purpose?
In this age of information overload and pressure to meet others’ expectations, many struggle to connect with their core purpose and values. It’s easy to lose your inner compass.
Jeanette Brown created this free values discovery PDF to help clarify your deepest motivations and beliefs. As an experienced life coach and self-improvement teacher, Jeanette guides people through major transitions by realigning them with their principles.
Her uniquely insightful values exercises will illuminate what inspires you, what you stand for, and how you aim to operate. This serves as a refreshing filter to tune out societal noise so you can make choices rooted in what matters most to you.
With your values clearly anchored, you’ll gain direction, motivation and the compass to navigate decisions from your best self – rather than fleeting emotion or outside influences.
Stop drifting without purpose. Rediscover what makes you come alive with Jeanette Brown’s values clarity guide.
Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.