12 things classy women never do in a relationship

Classy women are known for handling the most difficult moments with grace and confidence. When it comes to relationships, they won’t put up with unhealthy dynamics.

Sure, there are everyday issues that partners can resolve. But there are also a lot of relationship problems that shouldn’t be tolerated no matter what.

Here’s the deal: Classy women don’t engage in deal-breakers.

They stand for their values and principles and practice what they preach.

In this article, we’ll discuss some of the things that classy women won’t ever do in a relationship.

Let’s jump in!

1) They never control their partners

Classy women know full well that you can never really control another person. It’s just not possible.

That’s why they never….

  • Establish unreasonable rules like who their partners can be friends with or where they can go
  • Cry, scream, and burst into anger whenever things don’t go their way
  • Guilt-trip their partners
  • Bring their partners down to boost their self-esteem

Simply put: Classy women are never toxic partners. They don’t get desperate for something to change in the relationship. 

They know that their partners are unique and have a mind of their own.

This brings me to my next point ….

2) They never disrespect their partners (or anyone)

If there’s one thing that classy women cherish more than anything else, it’s respect.

They treat everyone with the same respect and kindness and expect others to do the same.

They value other people’s choices, opinions, and lives — regardless of who they are or what they do.

That’s why you’ll never find classy women rejecting their partners who reach out to them.

During arguments or disagreements, classy women will never say hurtful or rude comments such as insults to put their partners down.

They always listen to what their partners have to say. They don’t feel the need to always win or have the last say.

More importantly, they can agree to disagree. 

3) They never manipulate

Can you imagine going up to a partner and saying “You’re a master manipulator?”

The thing is, manipulation in a relationship can be tricky. Most of the time the signs can be obvious. But there are cases when it pops up in subtle ways.

More often than not, it comes in the form of gaslighting.

You know, when a partner plays the ‘victim’ card and makes you feel guilty so you think you are actually to blame.

They change the narrative of a situation just to get what they want.

Classy women will never use these tactics against their partners. They know that building a healthy relationship won’t happen if there is manipulation.

Instead of focusing on their ‘selves,’ they focus on the ‘us’ aspect of a relationship. 

4) They are never dishonest

Classy women believe that the one big thing in a relationship is trust. 

That’s why you’ll never catch them lying, even if it’s over something small.

Consider this: Trust is built in the littlest of moments. And if honesty builds trust, then dishonesty breeds dishonesty.

Well, classy women have no problem being honest. They know that being secretive is a sign of disrespect and a lack of trust.

They won’t leave their partners in the dark when it comes to anything — from their exes and their past to their finances, concerns with a family member, and all key issues in the relationship. 

5) They never get overly jealous

We’ve all been there. We’ve all experienced moments in our relationships when we felt a pang of jealousy. 

So, here’s the kicker: Jealousy isn’t necessarily a problem. A degree of jealousy shows that you care so much about your partner and want to protect the relationship.

But there’s a difference between feeling jealous and acting on that jealousy. 

The latter can lead to paranoia, obsession, doubt, and mistrust — all intense behaviors and emotions that can be destructive for partners.

For classy women, jealousy is a sign of insecurity. And they won’t have any of it.

They can manage jealousy without losing control. 

They understand that in a healthy relationship, partners must give each other space to be their own person. They trust their partner enough to not control or monitor them. 

6) They never talk down to their partner

When communicating with their partners, classy women always take the “we” approach instead of the “you versus me” approach. 

They know that communication is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship. 

It requires teamwork — which means that in any conversation, there shouldn’t be a dominant voice.

They won’t interrupt or correct their partner whenever they’re talking, just to make them feel that their input is not significant.

In other words: Classy women always leave room for their partner’s opinions to be heard. 

They learn and listen as much as they can, empowering their partners to feel that they can share openly and honestly.

7) They never belittle their partners

This is related to my earlier points about how classy women value respect in a relationship. 

But this time, it has everything to do with criticism. 

Relationship experts have identified criticism as one of the top signs that a marriage could end in divorce.

Over time, these judgmental comments can severely damage your partner and destroy the relationship for good.

Classy women never resort to these unnecessary verbal attacks. 

Ok, I know what you’re thinking: But don’t classy women also have complaints about their partners’ qualities or behaviors from time to time?

Of course, they do. But they choose to communicate those grievances in a manner that is calm and emotionally mature.

They can get their point across without severely hurting their partner’s feelings.

8) They never break boundaries

Learning how to effectively and properly set clear boundaries is key to a fulfilling and thriving relationship.

It creates natural limits that help partners avoid misunderstandings and feelings of tension or unease. These boundaries define where you and your partner start and stop.

For classy women, maintaining healthy boundaries is their way of telling their partners: “I’ll take responsibility for my part in the relationship.”

This means that they never overstep boundaries. You won’t find classy women:

  • Name-calling, yelling, or ridiculing their partners
  • Joking about sensitive topics
  • Invalidating their partner’s feelings
  • Sharing private information about their partners
  • Forcing their partners to do something even if they already said ‘no’

9) They never play the blame game

When a conflict happens in a relationship, partners tend to point fingers at each other. More often than not, someone in a relationship gets defensive or tends to shift blame.

Classy women, however, don’t have this toxic behavior.

They respect themselves enough to admit their mistakes and apologize to their partners.

They take responsibility for their actions and decisions. They are open to feedback because it allows them to learn, grow, and change for the better. 

10) They never give up their independence

Classy women won’t trade their independence for anything.

Whether it’s meeting with friends, pursuing new hobbies, enjoying alone time, or setting goals for themselves, classy women love to maintain a life outside of their partners or their relationships.

If they’re passionate about something, they hold onto it.

They believe that partners can grow as individuals while also nurturing long-term relationships.

They don’t like being held back, which means they won’t think twice about walking away from partners who won’t support their dreams and aspirations.

In the same way that they chase their dreams and goals, classy women will also love to see their partners succeed no matter what. 

11) They never neglect themselves

Committing to another person is a great thing, but giving up your feelings and needs just to satisfy your partner isn’t.

Here’s the deal: It’s totally understandable for someone in a relationship to strive to be a good partner — someone who always thinks of ways to make their partner happy.

The problem happens when you lose yourself in the process of giving your partner everything they want. 

Classy women never compromise or undermine their own desires for a partner. 

They understand that prioritizing self-care is crucial for fostering healthy relationships.

More importantly, they stand up and advocate for themselves. They don’t use a relationship as an excuse to never focus on their well-being and growth.

12) They never settle for less

Classy women know that the right partner will accept and love them just as they are.

So they won’t settle for anything less than that.

They know the kind of relationship they want and they stand firm when it comes to the qualities that they would and wouldn’t accept in a partner.

They won’t put with partners who:

  • Aren’t willing to exert effort to keep the relationship healthy, happy, and fresh
  • Don’t want to better themselves
  • Are unkind and inconsiderate
  • Discourage them from their goals
  • Are too dependent on them

And it doesn’t stop there: Classy women will walk away from partners who feel that something about them needs to be “fixed.” 

They love themselves for who and what they are, and they expect their partners to do the same. 

Maria Fatima Reyes

Fat Niebres is a freelance writer who loves to chase stories that matter. She finds meaning and inspiration in the mundane. When she's not writing, she's probably reading, eating, traveling, or having deep conversations with her husband. She brings her experience in broadcast, print, and NGO communications, and has been published in the Philippine Daily Inquirer and Inquirer.net.

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