A romantic relationship is a road paved with wonders and challenges. It’s a team of two people who perpetually learn how to shape themselves around each other, growing closer as they put the miles behind them.
Unfortunately, the destination isn’t always bright and full of rainbows. Sometimes, hearts break.
The best way to ensure your relationship only keeps strengthening? Find a high-quality man.
These are the 10 things he does differently in relationships.
1) He embraces all your shapes and edges
A high-quality man will never make you feel like you need to transform from pauper to princess just to please him.
Why? Because you’re a princess already, and he treats you as such. He doesn’t dictate what you should wear, doesn’t comment on your weight, doesn’t critique your behavior at every opportunity.
Relationships are about molding oneself around the other person. They’re about compromises and lessons and the occasional sacrifice, yes, but these things are fluid. Not rigid.
He might give you gentle feedback about a certain aspect of your behavior, but he would never expect to change the core of you, the stuff that makes you you.
He loves your personality and the complexity of your mind. And he adores the little things that you do, from funny facial expressions to your strange rules and quirks.
2) He has a keen awareness of the little things
Of course, little things aren’t always positive. Sometimes, it’s the way you grow overwhelmed in a supermarket, the cold expression on your face after an argument, or the unusual silence when you’re sad.
The thing about men is that they simply can’t take the hint. Unless you confront them, they’ll pretend everything’s just peachy.
A high-quality man is different. He notices the changing energy between the words unsaid. He is aware of the little signals you unconsciously send out when your emotions shift, and he isn’t afraid to ask you what’s wrong.
He’s there to offer emotional support before you even realize you need it.
3) He validates your emotions
Emotional support is something he’s a pro at.
No matter how you feel, he approaches your emotional state without judgment, ready to listen and share some of the burden.
This is the case even if he isn’t very emotional himself. My partner feels approximately two emotions per day while my mind is a hurricane, but that doesn’t stop him from acknowledging my feelings and helping me get through them.
Whilst most men offer solutions left and right, a high-quality man will ask you what you need.
If you just want to complain and cry, he will listen. If you want advice, he will give it.
Related: These 11 personality traits make a man instantly likeable
4) He takes his time to understand and probe your mind
The reason he’s so attuned to your emotional needs is that he loves the process of getting to know you.
To him, you are one of the most interesting people on Earth, and he loves you for your mind first and foremost. He enjoys discussing all sorts of topics with you, from kitchen utensils to the meaning of life, and he shows a keen interest in what you have to say.
The best part? He actually remembers your answers, filing them in his mind for future reference.
When you’re dating a high-quality man, you feel like you’re fascinating and irreplaceable. You’re special just on the sole basis of being you.
5) He gives you no reason to doubt him
Seeing as you’re special to him, he has no inkling to go looking elsewhere. A high-quality man doesn’t cheat. Full stop.
There’s more, though. Sleeping with someone else is one thing, but in the age of social media, there are countless ways to “micro-cheat”.
Messaging with girls in a flirtatious tone. Liking their half-naked photos on Instagram. Having a strange friendship with his ex or a female friend who’s just a bit too possessive.
This grey zone is the source of a lot of conflict in relationships, leading to fights, sleepless nights, and feelings of inferiority.
There’ll be none of that. When you date a high-quality man, he’ll respect your boundaries and give you no reason to feel suspicious or like you’re not enough.
There’s no grey zone where he is concerned.
6) He’s not a pushover
Boundaries are crucial to define for both people in the relationship, and he’s very much aware of where his own lie.
If you try to push them, he’ll tell you to stop.
A high-quality man is a man of principles, which means that he’ll aim to do what’s right not just for you, but also for himself. He has an innate sense of respect and love for who he is as a person, and this translates into confidence and steady boundaries.
He’s not going to change his mind just because you ask him to. He has too much integrity for that.
7) He never makes empty promises
Speaking of integrity, the difference between a man’s words and actions often determines his quality.
Does he stick to his promises? Does he go back on his word? Does he easily forget he’s made you a promise in the first place? Does he use words as a tool to placate you or as a truth that will drive his future behavior?
A high-quality man is a man of his word.
As the author and sociologist DaShanne Stokes said, “If your actions don’t live up to your words, you have nothing to say.”
8) He has his own universe
Integrity, principles, confidence… these all contribute to one thing that every high-quality partner possesses: his own independent life.
Long before he met you, he built his own universe of hobbies, friends, career goals, and passions. Long after you’ve started dating, he will keep this part of himself alive, returning to it when he’s not with you.
He might introduce you to some parts of this life, he might chat with you about it, he might even invite you to participate – but at its core, it’s his.
And why would this make him a high-quality man?
Good question. It’s because a man who has his own world won’t get the urge to hang onto yours with all his might, cutting your own independence off.
In other words, he’s not clingy.
9) He views you as a team of 100% + 100%, not 50% + 50%
To quote Rupi Kaur:
“i do not want to have you/ to fill the empty parts of me/ i want to be full on my own/ i want to feel so complete/ i could light a whole city/ and then/ i want to have you/ cause the two of/ us combined/ could set/ it on fire.”
Since he has his own stable universe independent of romance, he views himself as a full person. When you join the picture, you become a part of his team, but that doesn’t mean you two are less without each other.
It just means you’re stronger together. No negatives.
And when problems pop up – which they inevitably will – he doesn’t blame it on you or run away. Instead, he invites you to approach them as a team. The two of you versus the obstacle in front of you.
How will you go about solving it? It’s almost like a game when you think about it.
10) He’s playful around you
Really, he can make anything into a game. A high-quality man doesn’t take himself too seriously because he understands the inherent nature of life is… kind of silly.
We exist on a rock floating in space and we don’t even know why, so what’s the use in pretending we’re all so important and serious?
When he’s around you, he lets loose. He jokes around, gets silly, and creates a safe space where you can be your playful self, too.
This is because he is so deeply grounded in who he is that he’s not afraid of getting embarrassed. And in the end, that is the most crucial marker of a high-quality man – his love and acceptance of himself.
A man who is truly happy in his own skin will radiate the same energy toward everyone around him, making you feel alive, excited, and supported.
And if that’s not the best kind of person to accompany you on your journey through life, I don’t know who is.
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