Isabella Chase
We’ve all had moments where we didn’t recognize ourselves. It’s a strange feeling, right? Like you’re watching someone else in your own body.
It’s unsettling to think that you might be turning into someone you don’t particularly like. But according to psychology, there are subtle signs that can tell us if this is actually happening.
In this article, I’m going to walk you through 9 of these signs. These aren’t necessarily bad traits, but they’re definitely indicators that you might not be on the path to becoming your ideal self.
So let’s get started and see if any of these signs resonate with you.
1) You’re constantly self-critical
We all have a little voice inside our head that comments on our actions and decisions. But according to psychology, if that voice is getting increasingly harsh and negative, it might be a sign that you’re becoming someone you don’t really like.
Self-criticism isn’t inherently bad. It can drive us to improve and evolve.
But when it becomes constant and unrelenting, it can start to damage your self-esteem and confidence.
When you find yourself constantly belittling your efforts and achievements, or comparing yourself to others and finding yourself lacking, it might be time to take a step back and reassess.
Being aware of this inner critic and the damage it can cause is the first step towards positive change.
Remember, everyone has strengths and weaknesses. And self-improvement should be about growth, not beating yourself up over perceived failures.
2) You’re always feeling rushed
This one hits close to home for me.
There was a time when my calendar was so jam-packed that I barely had time to breathe. Work meetings, social commitments, family obligations – it was a never-ending whirlwind.
But here’s the thing. I started to realize that this constant rush wasn’t due to some external force. It was largely self-imposed.
I was taking on too many things, saying yes to every request, trying to please everyone but myself.
This perpetual state of hurry can be a sign that you’re not being true to yourself. You might be trying to meet expectations – real or imagined – at the expense of your own well-being.
When you find yourself always in a rush, feeling like there’s never enough time, it might be worth asking if you’re doing things because you truly want to or because you feel you have to.
Taking a step back and reassessing your priorities can make a world of difference. Trust me, I’ve been there.
3) You’re isolating yourself
Humans are social creatures by nature. Our ancestors survived and thrived in groups, and this has left an indelible mark on our psychology.
Yet, sometimes we find ourselves pulling away from others, spending more and more time alone.
Isolating yourself from your social circle can be a sign that you’re becoming someone you don’t really like.
This doesn’t mean that enjoying some alone time is bad. In fact, introverted individuals often recharge their energy by spending time alone.
However, when you start avoiding social interactions or declining invitations to events you would have previously enjoyed, it might be a signal that something’s amiss.
Psychologists have found that social isolation can often be a response to feelings of self-doubt or insecurity.
It’s easier to avoid others than confront these uncomfortable feelings. But in the long run, this can lead to loneliness and even contribute to mental health problems.
4) You’re ignoring your passions
Remember when you used to love painting? Or when playing the guitar was the highlight of your day?
If these passions are gathering dust because “you just don’t have the time”, it’s worth taking a moment to reflect.
Ignoring or sidelining your passions is a subtle sign that you’re becoming someone you don’t really like. It could mean you’re getting too caught up in the rat race, losing sight of what truly brings you joy.
Psychology suggests that engaging in activities we love not only brings happiness but also plays a crucial role in our self-identity.
When we neglect these activities, we may start to feel disconnected from our authentic selves.
So, pick up that paintbrush or guitar pick again. Reconnect with your passions and let them remind you of who you truly are and want to be.
5) You’re always feeling tired
Do you find yourself wondering why you’re always exhausted, even after a full night’s sleep?
This constant fatigue could be more than just physical tiredness. It might be a sign of emotional exhaustion.
When we’re not happy with who we are becoming, it can take a toll on our emotional energy, leaving us feeling perpetually drained. This can manifest as:
- Lack of motivation
- Diminished enthusiasm
- A general feeling of being worn out
Psychologists say that this kind of emotional fatigue often stems from internal conflict – like when our actions misalign with our values or desired self-image.
If you’re always feeling tired, it might be time to check in with yourself. Reflect on whether your current lifestyle aligns with your core values and aspirations. If it doesn’t, it might be the cause of your exhaustion.
6) You’re not taking care of yourself
Self-care isn’t just a trendy buzzword; it’s a fundamental part of being human.
We all need to nourish our bodies, minds, and souls. But when life gets busy or stressful, self-care is often the first thing to go.
Neglecting your own needs can be a sign that you’re becoming someone you don’t really like. It might mean that you’re prioritizing others’ needs over your own, or you’re so focused on achieving your goals that you’re neglecting your well-being.
Remember, it’s not selfish to take care of yourself. In fact, it’s necessary. If you don’t take care of yourself, how can you expect to take care of anyone or anything else effectively?
Psychology tells us that self-care is crucial for our mental health and overall well-being. When we neglect our needs, we can become resentful, burnt out, and disconnected from who we truly are.
So, if you’ve been neglecting your own needs lately, it might be time to show yourself some love and care. You deserve it.
7) You’re constantly feeling guilty
I used to beat myself up for the smallest things. I’d forget a friend’s birthday, miss a workout, or make a minor mistake at work, and the guilt would consume me.
It was like I was constantly on trial in my own mind.
This constant guilt can be a sign that you’re becoming someone you don’t really like. It might mean that you’re holding yourself to unrealistic standards or that you’re too focused on perfection.
Psychology tells us that while guilt can be a useful emotion for guiding our actions and maintaining social harmony, excessive guilt can be detrimental to our mental health.
If you find yourself in a constant state of guilt, it may be time to reassess your expectations of yourself.
It’s okay to make mistakes and to be imperfect. After all, we are all human.
8) You’re always on the defensive
Ever find yourself snapping back at a simple question or feeling the need to justify your actions at every turn?
This constant defensiveness can be a sign that you’re becoming someone you don’t really like.
Being defensive is a natural reaction when we feel threatened or criticized. However, when it becomes your default response, it’s worth digging a little deeper.
Constant defensiveness may be a sign of hidden insecurities or feelings of inadequacy. It might mean that you’re not comfortable with who you are becoming and are trying to protect yourself from perceived judgment or criticism.
Recognizing this behavior and understanding its roots is an important step towards becoming more comfortable with yourself and the person you want to be.
9) You’re not happy
At the end of the day, happiness is a personal journey. But if you’re frequently feeling unhappy, it could be a sign that you’re not satisfied with the person you’re becoming.
Happiness is more than just a fleeting emotion. It’s a state of being that reflects our satisfaction with ourselves and our lives.
If you’re constantly feeling unhappy, it might signal that you’re straying from your authentic self.
Lasting happiness comes from living in alignment with our values and being true to ourselves. If you’re not happy, it might be time to reassess and realign with what truly matters to you.
Remember, it’s okay to change course and make changes. Your happiness matters, and so does becoming a person you genuinely like and respect.
Final thoughts: Becoming yourself again
The journey of self-discovery and self-improvement is a personal and ongoing one. Sometimes, we lose sight of who we are and who we wish to become.
Yet, psychology tells us that recognising the subtle signs is a crucial first step towards change. Once you’re aware, you can start to make deliberate choices to realign with your authentic self.
So if you’ve noticed any of these signs in yourself, don’t be too hard on yourself. Acknowledge them, accept them, and then take steps towards becoming the person you genuinely want to be.
Remember, it’s your journey. And every step you take towards becoming more like the person you want to be is a step in the right direction.
