10 subtle signs someone is falling in love with you, according to psychology

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So, you’ve been seeing a certain guy and it’s going great–from your vantage point, anyway. You’ll probably begin to wonder if you’ve moved past mere mutual attraction and flirtation. 

To that end, it’s helpful to know how a man acts when he’s falling in love. 


Because knowing how your partner feels about you gives you the confidence to move forward in your relationship with him. 

But procuring that knowledge can be challenging. So if you want insight into your partner’s romantic intentions about you, certain hints indicate his feelings are growing.

Ready to learn more? 

Let’s talk about some signs that suggest a man is falling in love with you, according to psychology.

1) He wants to be close to you

Simple stuff, right? 

In the beginning of the relationship, your guy may be deliberately putting the brakes on. This isn’t a bad thing. He could be respecting your space or creating anticipation. 

And it’s always wise to avoid becoming too attached too early in the relationship. Slow and steady wins the race, after all.

But once a dude begins falling for you that carefully cultivated distance may fall by the wayside. 

Neurologically speaking, falling in love can produce feelings that mimic those of addiction. According to research, this can result in intensely focused attention on the one you desire. 

So if your new man wants to be around you all the time, that’s a pretty good sign that he’s all in.

So, if you’re having sleepovers more often than not and your guy is making plans for you both well in advance, he’s probably been bitten by the love bug. 

2) He wants to be REALLY close to you 

While we’re in the thick of falling in love, we are turned on like Times Square on New Year’s Eve. 

There’s actual science behind this. The combination of testosterone and dopamine creates an arousal spike while lowering one’s inhibitions. Thanks to happy hormones, the urge to merge is continuous, causing you to throw caution to the wind in the interest of getting your freak on.

You can thank oxytocin for that explosive physical attraction. Physical closeness with your partner releases the bonding hormone oxytocin into your bloodstream and it’s a high like no other. 

There’s a reason oxytocin is called the love hormone.

3) He can’t stop looking at you

If you catch him looking at you all the time, he’s probably infatuated. If you’re returning his gaze, you probably are as well, too.

This is among the cutest and most obvious indications that he’s falling for you. The stolen glances, the shy smiles, the butterflies in the tummy.

Ain’t love grand?  

4) He’ll talk to you on the phone 

It’s a fact that many men dislike talking on the phone. It’s also a fact that many women hate it, too. So if you guys can blather for hours on the phone with each other, you’ve probably happened upon someone very special.

For a lot of guys, the phone is an instrument of torture. So if he’s making an exception for you, take note. That boy is falling for you.

5) He’s suddenly an optimist 

When a guy’s really in love, the grumpiest of Grumpy Guses can turn into a rose-colored-glasses-wearing optimist.  

Because when you’re falling in love everything is super-duper and awesomely awesome. You may even feel more motivated and energetic.  

You can thank all that dopamine you’ve been producing just thinking about your partner.

The only downside is your friends quietly vomiting in a corner from a saccharine overdose. 

6) He wants you to be happy 

Many men derive satisfaction by causing positive feelings for the people they love. And as your connection deepens, your guy may be on the lookout for signs that you’re happy and content. 

So if he smiles when you smile or does nice things for you “just because,” he could be falling in love with you.

Obviously, different guys fall in love in different ways, but a desire to see someone happy and do everything he can to make it so clearly indicates attraction or love. 

7) He’s in tune with you

Is your man effortlessly in tune with your feelings? Can he anticipate your reaction or correctly gauge your mood? 

This ability to hone in on your feelings is a clear sign of increasing closeness between you both. Empathy is a vital component of successful relationships. 

The ability to look at the world from their partner’s point of view means a man is probably in love. If he really gets you, he probably really loves you.

8) He turns to you 

If a man loves you, he may reveal it by seeking comfort from you when things go south in his life. 

Grief and fear are difficult emotions for anyone to navigate. Many men deal with big feelings by withdrawing. But a guy who loves you may turn to you for solace and encouragement.

And this isn’t just on an emotional level. The comfort you provide for your partner also reverberates in more tangible ways. Research shows that just seeing a photo of your love can minimize the perception of physical pain

9) He takes you home to Mother

If you’re always included in the plans of your man’s inner circle, including his family, that’s an excellent indication that his feelings for you are growing stronger

He may, in fact, be falling in love.

When a guy starts bringing you around his friends and family, it’s probably because he sees a future with you and wants to include you in every aspect of his life.

So if you’ve met his mom or best friend, there’s a good chance that even if he’s not in love already, he’s well on his way.

10) You’re his go-to person

When something goes wrong, who is your man’s go-to person? You know, that one person he knows will never let him down?

Oh, that’s you?  

Then he’s probably in love with you, as men are conditioned not to show vulnerability. Guys in love realize that one of the biggest perks is the ability to be completely authentic with your partner.  

When a man feels better simply by being in your presence, there’s a decent chance it’s the real deal. 

Final thoughts 

Love may be a many splendored thing but it’s also confusing as all get-out. That confusion provides the thrill and the rush, but it can also cloud your thinking.

So if you’re really into a guy and want to know if you’re both on the same page, now you have ten backed-by-science ways to get a better idea.

Knowledge is power! 

Kathy Copeland Padden

Kathy Copeland Padden lives in a New England forest paradise with her cats, kid, and trusty laptop. She has been writing since age 8 and is such a pack rat she can back that up with physical evidence. Music is her solace and words are her drug, so her house is strewn with records and books. Watch your step.

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