19 spiritual meanings why you keep dreaming about your ex

Does your ex start popping in your dream?

When I dreamt of my ex, it felt weird, and I wondered – what on Earth is going on!

There could be a psychological explanation for those dreams or a deep mystery behind them. While it can be unsettling, it’s better to know the potential spiritual meanings of dreaming about your ex.

In this article, I’ll reveal everything to you in much detail so you can gain clarity and comfort in your situation.

19 spiritual reasons when you dream of your ex

It’s normal to have these dreams and even get emotional. But it doesn’t just mean that you want to get back together or end things with your partner.

The thing is, our subconscious mind is a lot more complex than that.

Regardless of whether it was an awkward breakup or a mutual decision, those dreams mean something.

1) You were saddened by the end of the relationship

Perhaps you’re still grieving the loss of the relationship you once shared.

Even if it’s a mutual breakup, you may be guilty of breaking the other person’s heart.

Allow yourself time to grieve the loss. But make an effort to understand what went wrong in your relationship to heal. This is the best way you can truly move forward.

Allow these coping strategies to help you too:

  • Feel and express all of your emotions – and share them with the people you trust
  • Make the most of your time to reconnect with yourself.
  • Spend time doing what you love and what makes you feel happy
  • Be grateful for what you’ve learned from the relationship and your ex

2) You have unresolved feelings toward your ex

Those unresolved feelings don’t mean having romantic feelings.

You could be overthinking the whole situation. Perhaps you’re finding answers to why things ended or what exactly triggered the breakup.

If you often think about the breakup or desperately try not to think about it, it will haunt you in your dreams.

The more you think about what happened, the more those unresolved feelings will hit you like a boomerang.

You’re dreaming of your ex as your subconscious mind is dealing with your emotional baggage.

3) There’s too much negativity in your life

Are there things that don’t fulfill you anymore? Do you have unresolved issues from your past or things that don’t fulfill you anymore?

You might not be aware of it.

But those things can throw you off balance and hinders your growth and happiness.

For example, if you have childhood trauma or your ex cheated on you, you might have dreams about cheating on your current partner.

Your subconscious is working with the things you don’t “know” in your waking lives – and could be trying to “solve” the problem if you still haven’t had proper closure.

4) You have “unfinished business”

This is especially true if you recently ended your relationship.

Before you panic or get too worked up, this doesn’t indicate you want your ex back or that you still care for them.

After all, those unfinished business and feelings are probably not about your ex at all.

Dreaming about your ex could mean that you have this unmet need that creates a void in your life. It could be a lack of self-confidence, emotional support, or something else entirely.

5) You fear the consequences that follow

If your ex has been appearing in your dreams, there is probably something in your new relationship that you’re terrified of.

Maybe you’re afraid of being hurt again if you love too much.

If you’re having the same issues with your current partner, maybe you’re worried that your relationship is heading in the same direction.

While trusting someone after experiencing heartbreak or being betrayed is difficult, you must overcome your anxiety.

Never let your pains, fears, and worries hold you back from loving and living your life to the fullest.

Instead of holding on to the past, try to let go of your limiting beliefs to regain control of your life.

6) Dreams contain the key to complete healing

Carl Jung’s Theory of Dreams believes that our dreams contain information that can heal and restore us to mental and emotional health.

Having dreams about an ex may serve as a reminder to mend your relationships with family and friends, forgive someone who has wronged you, and be more empathetic or compassionate.

It’s because our brain processes emotional experiences while sleeping and aids in the healing of painful memories.

7) You’ve recently seen your ex

Did your ex call or messaged you out of the blue? Or did you bump into each other in a neighboring cafe or even out of town.

Or maybe you were mindlessly scrolling your phone, and you’ve seen your ex.

These unexpected situations could bring up memories, which can lead to dreams about them.

Remembering the times you’ve spent together is quite normal.

The thing is, you don’t always have control over how memories appear in your mind.

So when your ex appears in your dream, part of the memory consolidation process. This is because sometimes our dreams include situations that we experience in our waking lives.

Even if your ex wasn’t very active in the dream, a shift in your routine could have sparked a memory that presented itself in your dream.

8) Your ex is dreaming about you

This is always an interesting question: Is it true that if you’re thinking of your ex, they’re also thinking of you?

Dreaming about your ex might sometimes (but not always) mean that they are also dreaming of you.

If your ex is manifesting you or you’re spiritually linked, you are most likely dreaming about your ex because they are dreaming of you at the same moment!

You won’t know for sure unless you ask your ex, though, you don’t need to do that.

Pay attention to the signs to know that you are running on someone’s mind:

  • Seeing angel numbers like 222, 808, or 5555 everywhere
  • Sensing the presence of your ex (though they’re physically far away)
  • Experiencing emotional changes and mood swings
  • Having random eye twitches

Sometimes those signs show that the reason why you’re dreaming of your ex is probably that they’re dreaming and thinking of you.

9) You need relationship closure

Our subconscious mind is an odd place as it holds memories that we think we’ve forgotten.

So even if you thought you’ve given your past relationship closure or convinced yourself that you don’t need that anymore, your subconscious mind disagrees.

You’re dreaming of your ex as it could be triggered by your need for closure.

Probably there are unhealed scars or unresolved conflicts from the past that you need to address.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Were you honestly satisfied with how your relationship ended?
  • Have you let go of all your wounds?
  • Was there something you regret saying or not saying?
  • Have you wished that things had gone differently?

This closure is a means for you to make sense of a situation.

And it doesn’t imply that you contact your ex to obtain the ‘closure’ you need. This closure is something that you can fix even on your own.

10) You feel alone

The hardest part of dealing with a breakup is handling the loneliness that comes with it. It’s tougher if you’ve been together for many years.

For when the relationship ends, your companion ends too – and you feel alone.

When you keep dreaming about your ex, it doesn’t mean that you want the person back. Probably, you’re missing the companionship and the support you once had.

While some are tempted to jump right away into another relationship to replace the lost companion, try not to.

Instead, reach out to your family and friends – and let them know that you need good company.

Most importantly, take good care of yourself.

Get enough sleep, pamper yourself, or do something that will boost your happiness.

11) It’s all about you

When you dream about your ex, it’s not necessarily about the person.

Our dreams represent pieces of our emotions and parts of ourselves. And most of the time, what we see and feel in our dreams may or may not be true. What’s true are the emotions attached to these experiences.

Lauri Loewenberg, certified dream analyst, shares this,

“Whatever’s going on in the dream is going to reflect not necessarily [what’s going on] between you and your ex, but what’s going on with you.”

What could this mean?

  • You miss the person that you are when you’re still together
  • You gave up too much of yourself and are trying to reclaim it
  • You’ve been ignoring yourself and your needs
  • You’re dissatisfied with something in your life
  • You long for the warmth and joy you had previously experienced

Whatever it could be, find time to analyze your thoughts and emotions during the time you were with your ex. Your feelings are valid but don’t dwell on them for too long.

12) It could be a warning of some sort

If you frequently keep dreaming of your ex, it can come as a warning.

Sometimes, having vivid dreams are connected with real-life issues.

But there’s no reason for you to panic or worry.

Dreaming of former flames is seldom related to real-life dangers, but it doesn’t hurt to take caution as well.

Probably, it means that you need to focus on your personal or professional life. Those dreams could also be sending you a warning to work on your habit to improve yourself.

13) You’ve lost touch with your inner self

Love is beautiful yet complicated, and heartbreaks will always be devastating.

Sometimes, dreaming of your former flame means dreaming of your lost self.

It’s like feeling disconnected from your true self and feeling like a part of you is missing.

One of the hardest battles you’ll ever face is your fight with yourself. This means that dreaming of your ex represents your inner struggle.

When you refuse to face your fears and everything that’s sabotaging your growth, they will come into your dreams as divine reminders.

Take the presence of your ex in your dream as a wake-up call to help you regain your sense of self.

How to reclaim your sense of worth?

  • Understand that you existed before you got into a relationship
  • Practice meditation and spend time with nature
  • Pursue your dreams and passions
  • Express yourself in various ways, from painting to singing
  • Acknowledge your feelings, but be gentle with yourself

14) You seek change in your current relationship

Your dreams are shedding light on your unmet wants and desires. There would be things you want and desire in your new relationship.

Regardless of whether you’re content, there could be certain things your ex did that you wish your present partner would do.

When your ex is guesting in your dreams, see it as a reminder to think about and act on your current position.

So make sure to communicate this with your current partner.

Don’t worry because there are several ways you can improve and spice up your relationship.

15) Starting a new relationship worry you

Are you hesitant to date or love someone again?

Probably, you worry about getting to know someone romantically or getting hurt again.

Seeing your ex in your dreams could mean that your subconscious is sending a message about the person you’re destined to be with. It could be telling you to deal with your anxiety to be able to meet “The One” the Universe has set for you.

Here are tips to help you work on yourself:

  • Let things unfold naturally
  • Take charge of your thoughts and emotions
  • Accept yourself – your strengths and weaknesses
  • Keep your mind preoccupied to distract yourself from worries
  • Do things you’re good at to boost your self-esteem

16) Your ex has the qualities you desire

When you see your ex in your dreams, it could mean that your former flame has qualities or traits you admire in a person or a relationship.

Even if you have no intention to rekindle the romance, it’s possible that you’re being pulled to this person for the qualities they possess.

It could be your former flame’s sense of humor, independence, or affectionate nature.

If you’re spiritually connected in some way, your ex could be your soul mate, your twin flame, or otherwise a kindred spirit.

17) There’s something that you miss

One reason why you’re dreaming of your ex could be the sense of nostalgia.

It’s confusing as you can never be certain whether you miss the person, the companionship, the relationship, or your previous life with them.

Probably, if it’s not the person, you miss how being loved and cared for feels.

But as with everything else in life, this too shall pass.

Know that the spiritual realm wants the best for your life. And sooner or later, you’ll be with the person with whom you will create lots of meaningful memories too.

18) You’re on the verge of forgiveness

You’ve been hurt badly by your ex that your world shattered into a million pieces.

But, you’ve come to realize that forgiveness will give you peace of mind and closure.

It’s true that even if you’re in pain or angry, you can leave the past and forgive what had been, so you can start anew.

Forgiving those who have wronged and hurt us can bring a significant effect on our health and overall happiness.

When we keep holding on to resentment, bitterness, and thoughts of revenge, we’re only filling our lives with too much negativity.

So when your ex keeps popping in your dreams, it could be that your subconscious mind is trying to tell you that the time has come to forgive your ex and truly move on.

Forgive yourself and your ex, for when you forgive with your heart, that’s when you can truly move on.

19) You’re meant to be for each other

Okay, this might sound a bit crazy, or maybe not.

Your situation could be one of those “right person, wrong time” scenarios wherein you need to break up for some external reasons.

From a spiritual perspective, they say that if two people are meant to be together, they’ll find their way back.

Dreaming of your ex could be a sign that you ought to reunite in the future.

If you think that there’s a shred of hope in getting back together, your mind and your spirit will not give up.

Your subconscious can sense this, and the Universe is working to put the odds in your favor.

If this reason resonates with you and you also want to be together, you can use the Law of Attraction to manifest your ex back.

For even if your breakup happened a long time ago and you’ve both been in different relationships if you’re destined to be with each other – it will happen.

Decoding those dreams about your ex

Our dreams, whether or not it’s about our former flame, provide us with valuable information and help us process difficult stuff.

These dreams allow us to deal with toxic patterns and emotional entanglements.

Here’s the thing:

Our past experiences help shape who we are in the present.

It brings a reminder that for our future relationships to be healthy, we need to let go of all the negativity in our life.

Hopefully, those dreams will lead you to a happier life and even better relationships in the future.

Czaroma Roman

Czaroma is a content strategist and copywriter with a purposeful mindset. She finds fulfillment in crafting content for entrepreneurs and life coaches. In a place of love and growth, she's raising a tribe of three with her husband - and writes to inspire people to create impactful relationships.

Connect with her on LinkedIn and Instagram.

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