The spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex (complete guide)

Do you often dream about your ex?

Well, it’s quite a regular thing. I, too, had such dreams, which is why I decided to ‘investigate’ more about their spiritual meanings.

Let me share with you what I’ve learned throughout my research:

The spiritual meanings of dreaming about your ex

Dreaming about your ex comes with profound spiritual meanings. More often than not, it’s because the universe wishes to tell you this:

1) You share a strong spiritual connection with your ex

Perhaps you’re lucky enough to be spiritually bound with your ex-partner. In fact, it could be the main reason why they keep on popping into your dreams.

If they’re your twin flame, for example, then you have a strong connection with them. You ‘mirror’ one another, after all.

You even communicate with each other through dreams, which is why dreaming about them is pretty common.

They could also be your soulmate. Although thought to be the same, it’s a whole different ball game. You share a profound connection simply because you are ‘predestined soul contacts.’

Whatever the case may be, your dreams prove that you share a profound spiritual affinity with your ex.

2) They’re always on your mind

I know it’s hard to get over a person you’ve loved for a long time. But, even if it’s been years after your break-up, they may pop into your mind from time to time.

If they’re constantly in your mind, don’t be surprised if you keep on dreaming about them repeatedly.

As to why – it’s because your dreams are thoughts. As author Laurie Lowenberg explains:

“Whatever your stream of thought is as you drift off continues and begins to go inward. As your conscious, waking, literal mind slips into a state of rest, your deep inner subconscious mind takes over.”

And, on the off-chance that you’re still unable to get them off your mind, you may continue dreaming about them for years after you’ve broken up!

3) It’s a calling to reconnect with yourself

I’ll be blunt: your dream has little to do with them and more with you.

First off, it could be a sign from the universe that you should start appreciating yourself more – something which you may have forgotten during your relationship.

On the other hand, it’s an invitation to embrace your flaws and imperfections. To be comfortable in your own skin before deciding to connect with someone on a deeper level – perhaps, even, another relationship.

4) Your ex misses you

Your twin flame of an ex may be a stubborn individual who refuses to express their feelings. Well, the joke’s on them. Even if they don’t want to tell you that they miss you, they may unwittingly end up communicating their inner thoughts through your dreams.

Trust me, it’s a sign that your ex is thinking about you.  They’re thinking about you so badly that they manage to dominate your dreams!

Dreaming is not the only way twin flames communicate, though. You may experience bodily sensations – even strong emotions – whenever they’re around.

It’s up to you to respond to this call.

5) The universe wants you to be together again

Maybe you still love your ex – but you have no choice but to break up with them. Blame it on chance, circumstance, or perhaps even distance.

In this case, the spiritual reason you’re dreaming about them is apparent. The universe knows that you’re meant to be together.

They’re sending you these dreams to make you realize that you still love this person – even if you’ve parted ways with them.

And, if you’re genuinely wondering how to get your ex back, there’s only one thing to do. And that is to re-ignite their romantic interest in you!

I learned about this from Brad Browning, who has helped thousands of men and women get their exes back. He goes by the moniker of “the relationship geek” for a good reason.

In his free video, he’ll show you precisely what you need to do to rekindle the flame with your ex.

No matter what your situation is — or how bad the problem may be right now — he’ll give you several valuable tips that you can apply immediately.

Here’s a link to his free video again. If you really want your ex back, this video will help you do this.

6) Issues remain unresolved

You can liken your dreams to a ghost. They’re haunting you because your feelings about your ex remain unresolved.

There’s no proper closure, so to speak.

Maybe you parted ways all of a sudden. You just stormed off, and you haven’t talked to them ever since.

You don’t even know why your ex left you in the first place.

On the other hand, they may not know why you went away.

Well, the universe knows that your feelings are hanging by a thread. By putting your ex on a dream loop, they’re giving you the courage to settle things once and for all.

7) You don’t want to be hurt all over again

If your break-up has badly hurt you, you may find yourself reluctant to get into a new relationship.

I get you. You’re afraid to get hurt all over again.

Well, you can take these dreams as some sort of warning. They’re telling you to be more cautious in making decisions, especially if you’re planning to pursue a new relationship right now.

It’s possible that the universe knows you haven’t learned much from your past experience yet. So they’re tapping into your dreams to tell you that you shouldn’t let these bad things happen to you again.

8) Some changes need to be made

Nobody’s perfect. Maybe you became someone you didn’t want to be when you were with your ex.

For example, you may have ignored your family or friends because you put all your attention on your ex.

Likewise, you may have changed how you act and look just to please your former beau.

Well, your soul recognizes this. You’ve changed when you were with them, and it’s not for the better.

See, the universe wants you to take a good hard look at what happened to you before. Maybe you haven’t realized this yet. Through your dreams, your subconscious is giving you a chance by showing you everything you’ve done wrong.

9) You feel guilty

Maybe things weren’t working out anymore. And, along the way, you may have ended up cheating on them.

Whatever the reason for the breakup, the clear ending was that you left your ex high and dry.

And, you may be dreaming about them because you’re carrying the guilt of breaking their heart.

As Dr. Grant Hilary Brenner explains it in his Psychology Today article:

“We push feelings into unconsciousness, but they remain implicit, having an impact on our unconscious waking process and emerging in the evening.”

He adds:

“There is a greater tendency for negative waking thoughts to manifest within dreams, specifically sadness, anxiety, anger, and fear.”

10) You feel sad

We’ve all been there. You’ve spent years (decades even) with a single person. And before you know it, the whole thing comes crashing down.

Of course, it’s normal to feel sad about it. It’s part of the break-up – a stage most know as depression.

As Dr. Brenner explains above, this sadness is one of the reasons why you’re dreaming about your ex.

It’s a way for you to handle your emotions, after all.

As Hedy Marks of WebMD explains:

“Some dreams may help our brains process our thoughts… For example, if you go to bed with a troubling thought, you may wake with a solution or at least feel better about the situation.”

11) You’re scared

Some women (and men too) often find themselves in violent relationships. And, even after breaking up, you may still find yourself scared of them.

So apart from experiencing physical signs such as stomach issues or chills, you may manifest this fear by dreaming of them.

Echoing Dr. Brenner, fear is one of the negative thoughts that can prevail in your dreams.

The sad part here is this dream is more of a nightmare. You end up reliving the bad things over and over again. Sadly, this can put undue stress on your mental health.

Call it relationship PTSD, if you will.

12) There’s a feeling of unfulfillment

Dreaming is the mind’s way of processing your feelings – including some that you haven’t acknowledged yet.

In this case, it may be one of unfulfillment.

See, it may not be your ex per se who causes unfulfillment. Maybe during the relationship, you’ve felt frustrated.

It was as if your partner limited you from reaching your full potential.

For example, you may not have been able to take on an overseas job offer because you couldn’t stand the thought of being apart from your partner.

13) You’ll find someone new

Even if your ex is the star of your dream, it doesn’t always mean that they’re the star of your heart. In fact, this could be a sign that the universe is bringing you toward someone new.

So why is your ex materializing in your dream, you ask?

For one, your spirit may be trying to point out something. Maybe your ex has a bad attitude that you should be on the lookout for.

Then again, it may be a good quality that you should consider in your next beau.

All in all, this dream is trying to teach you a lesson about your future relationship.

14) Something else is making you upset

Just because you’re dreaming about your ex doesn’t mean that they’re the only thing that’s making you sad.

Sure, they may be part of it. But in this case, the universe pertains to something more profound.

Just like breaking up with your ex, your spirit may want you to break up with your bad traits as well.

Take it as a metaphor, if you will.

If you can’t seem to point a finger at what’s upsetting you, it’ll help to reflect and ask yourself these questions:

  • “Am I happy with what I am (and have) right now?”
  • “Do I have bad habits?”
  • “Is there somebody else dragging me down?”

15) You’re unconsciously comparing your past and present relationships

Dreaming about your ex doesn’t always mean you’re not over them. Sometimes, this happens because you’re unconsciously trying to compare your current relationship with the last one.

See, you may be having some doubt as to whether or not this new partner is worth your time (and energy.) You don’t want to go through another heartbreak, after all.

While these dreams may be unsettling, they’ll eventually go away. This usually happens once you get comfortable in your new relationship.

In case they don’t, then you should treat your dreams as warning signs. They may be here to tell you to take good care in this new relationship.

What you can do

You keep dreaming about your ex because it has left you with many issues and realizations.

It’s not enough that you acknowledge them, though.

See, the universe is showing you these dreams because they want you to do any (or all) of these things:

Forgive your ex…

“Forgive and forget,” says the old adage.

I understand that this is easier said than done. It’s hard to forgive a cheater who’s hurt you a lot.

And, if you’re really petty, you may try to get back at them by having an affair with another.

At the end of the day, this won’t do you good. It won’t change the fact that your ex slept with someone else.

Worse, you just might end up having regrets about this fling.

Do you know what would feel good, though? Forgiveness. It’s just like taking a massive chunk off your chest.

It’s part of the last stage of the break-up: acceptance.

By being forgiving of the circumstances that happened, you may put a stop to the whole ‘dreaming about your ex’ shindig.

…and yourself too

As mentioned, your long-standing guilt may be one of the reasons why your ex keeps on appearing in your dreams.

Maybe you were the one who cheated and left them high and dry.

If you want to end these dreams once and for all, then it’s high time you forgave yourself.

Here’s what Lachlan, our Hackspirit founder, has to say about this:

“Acknowledge what you did…and let it out into the universe. You don’t have to carry it with you everywhere you go. Say it so you can forgive it.”

Remember: forgiving yourself is also about ensuring that bad things don’t happen again. Should you go back to your old ways and cheat on your next partner, this vicious dreaming cycle will just go round and round.

Communicate with your ex

As I’ve discussed, the lack of closure is one of the main reasons you keep dreaming about your ex. So if they continue to linger in your slumber, maybe it’s time for you to establish communication with them again.

I know. It’s hard to deal with someone who’s betrayed you. But just like forgiving them, this can take a considerable load off your chest.

As usual, you can go the traditional route of talking to them. Set a meeting with them and talk things through.

If this proves to be too taxing for you, you can always try and write them a letter. This may be an easier way to pour out all your thoughts.

Try to mend things

If you can try to patch things up, then by all means, go.

Your ex may be hurting, and the least you can do is extend an olive branch.

“If you cannot repair it, you need to say your peace at least and give the person a chance to know that you are working to make things better,” explains Lachlan.

Mending things will not only put an end to your dreams, but it may also pave the way for reconciliation!

Rather than leaving it up to fate, it’s better if you take things into your own hands.

I mentioned Brad Browning earlier, an expert in relationships and reconciliation.

His practical tips have helped thousands of men and women reconnect with their exes. Better yet, he helped them rebuild the love and commitment they once shared.

If you’d like to do the same, check out his excellent free video here.

Turn to friends or family

As I’ve explained, sadness is one of the spiritual reasons your ex appears in your dreams. And, if you’re feeling all alone, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to turn to your former flame (though you can too.)

You can always rely on your family and friends. They’re the best support system you could ever have.

According to experts from the University of Buffalo:

“Supportive relationships can also bolster you emotionally when you’re feeling down or overwhelmed. Friends and loved ones will listen to your fears, hopes, and dreams, and make you feel seen and understood.

“They can help you think through alternatives and solve problems, and they can distract from your worries when that is what’s really needed. In doing all this they provide encouragement and lower your stress and feelings of loneliness.”

Do what you’ve always wanted to do

If your ex got in the way of your dreams and aspirations, then it’s time to do them now!

Pursue the overseas job you’ve always wanted.

Paint, draw, write, whatever. Go back to the hobbies you had to let go of because of them.

The universe is essentially telling you to follow your heart – even if you’re nursing a broken one. It’s never too late to work on your passions.

Consult with a professional

If fear of your ex makes you dream about them, then you may want to speak to a mental health professional. For one, dreaming about them may keep you up at night, every night. If left unresolved, this may lead to full-blown anxiety or depression.

With the help of your therapist, you may help address these dreams – including the fears that lie beneath them.

Raychel Ria Agramon

I'm Raye, a nurse licensed in both the Philippines and the US. I also have a Master's degree in Public Management.

Just like helping my patients, I like to empower & motivate readers with research-backed articles.

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