There are some people in life who make you laugh a little louder, smile a bit bigger, and live just a little better.
Those are the people we call our friends.
They’re the ones in our lives who’ve been there through thick and thin, who’ve seen us at our best and worst, and still stuck around.
But sometimes you can’t help but overthink, wondering, “is this person truly the good friend I believe them to be?”
Fortunately, psychology can help you answer this question. It can pinpoint certain signs that signify a truly good friend.
So, in this article, we’ll delve into these signs that show that you’ve got a really good friend in your life, according to psychology.
By the end of it, I hope you know whether the person you’re thinking of right now is a truly good friend.
1) They’re always there for you
Life has a funny way of throwing problems at us when we least expect them. During these times, it’s the people who stick around that truly matter.
When you’re going through a tough time, does your friend stand by your side?
Are they there to lend an ear when you need to vent? Do they offer a comforting shoulder to lean on when things get too overwhelming?
It’s in these moments of vulnerability that you can truly gauge the depth of your friendship.
For a friendship to stand the test of time, it needs to be built on a foundation of mutual support and understanding.
If your friend is always there for you during your highs and lows, then according to psychology, you’ve got a really good friend in your life.
2) They can read your emotions
I have this friend who seems to have this uncanny ability to pick up on my moods, even when I’m trying my best to hide them.
It’s almost as if they’ve got some kind of radar tuned into my emotional frequency.
I remember a time when I was going through a particularly difficult patch in life. I was trying to keep it together, plastering on a smile and pretending everything was just fine.
But this friend looked at me and said, “You know you don’t have to pretend with me, right?”
It wasn’t something I had told them or even something they had guessed. They just knew.
According to psychology, this is a sign of emotional intelligence—a key trait of a truly good friend.
They’re not just there for the good times, but they can also sense when you’re not feeling your best and offer their support without being asked.
Having someone who can understand your emotions without you having to spell them out is indeed a blessing. It’s comforting to know that even when you’re not at your best, you’re not alone.
3) They celebrate your successes
I landed my dream job after months of rigorous interviews and anxious waiting. I was over the moon, but there was a part of me that was nervous about sharing the news.
In the past, I’ve had friends who responded to my successes with masked smiles and barely concealed envy. It made me feel guilty for being happy about my achievements.
But this time, it was different.
When I shared the news with my friend, their face lit up with genuine happiness. They were as excited about my achievement as I was, if not more.
They didn’t just say the customary “congratulations.” They celebrated with me, shared my joy, and made that moment even more special for me.
That’s when it hit me. A really good friend doesn’t just tolerate your success; they celebrate it.
A person who can genuinely be happy for others’ success without any hint of jealousy or resentment is a person who is secure in themselves and values their relationships more than their ego.
And it’s a truly invaluable trait in a friend.
4) They’re honest with you
We’ve all had a moment when we’re about to make a questionable decision, and we turn to our friend for advice.
What they say next can say a lot about the kind of friend they are.
I recall a time when I was about to make a hasty career decision. I was ready to jump into a job that looked shiny on the outside but had many red flags that I was choosing to ignore.
I turned to my friend, hoping they would validate my decision.
But instead of the validation I was seeking, they gave me a dose of harsh truth. They pointed out the red flags I was ignoring and asked me if I was sure about what I was getting myself into.
At first, their words stung. But as the initial sting wore off, I realized that they were right.
I was so blinded by the shiny exterior of the job that I was ignoring the potential problems.
Honesty is an important sign of true friendship. A good friend will tell you what you need to hear, not just what you want to hear.
They’d rather risk upsetting you in the short term than see you make a mistake that could have lasting consequences.
So, if you have a friend who has the courage to be honest with you, even when it’s uncomfortable, count yourself lucky. You’ve got a really good friend in your life.
5) They respect your boundaries
Every friendship, no matter how close, requires a certain level of respect for personal boundaries.
I remember a time when I was dealing with a personal issue that I wasn’t ready to talk about. In my circle of friends, we are usually open about our problems.
But this time, I just needed some space to process things on my own.
I was worried about how my friends would react, but to my surprise, they understood. They gave me the space I needed without any judgment or pressure. They respected my need for privacy and let me deal with it at my own pace.
Respect for boundaries is an important aspect of any relationship. It shows an understanding of the individuality of the other person and a willingness to give them the space they need.
Their ability to respect your individual needs while maintaining the bond of friendship is a testament to the strength and depth of your friendship.
6) They’re consistent
One thing I’ve noticed about my friend is their consistency. They’ve shown me time and time again that they are reliable and dependable.
There was a time when I was moving to a new apartment. It was a stressful time, with so many things to pack and sort out.
I was feeling overwhelmed, but then my friend stepped in. They didn’t just offer to help, they showed up and helped me pack, move and even settle into my new place.
Their actions weren’t out of the ordinary or a one-off thing. That’s just the kind of person they are. They show up when it matters and they’re consistent in their actions.
Psychology identifies consistency as one of the signs of a good friend.
A person who is consistent in their actions shows that they can be trusted and relied upon.
7) They make you feel good about yourself
There’s something quite magical about a friend who has the ability to make you feel good about yourself.
I remember once feeling really low about a mistake I’d made. It was one of those days when I was being particularly hard on myself. But then, my friend stepped in.
They didn’t belittle my feelings or make me feel silly for beating myself up.
Instead, they reminded me of my strengths, my past successes, and all the times I’d bounced back from difficult situations before.
They helped me see myself in a positive light, even when I was struggling to do so myself.
This is a trait that identifies a good friend.
A really good friend has the ability to boost your self-esteem and make you feel good about yourself, even when you’re finding it hard to do so.
8) They accept you for who you are
I’m not perfect. I have my quirks, my flaws, and my unique ways of seeing the world.
But there’s this friend who has seen all of it—the good, the bad, and the ugly—and they’ve accepted me for who I am.
They’ve never tried to change me or fit me into a mold. Instead, they’ve embraced my individuality and encouraged me to be myself.
Acceptance is a key element of a good friendship. A friend who accepts you for who you are, with all your strengths and weaknesses, is a friend who truly values you.
So, if you have a friend who accepts you for who you are, without any conditions or expectations of change, then that’s the ultimate sign you’ve got a really good friend in your life.
Their acceptance not only strengthens your bond but also gives you the freedom to be yourself without any fear of judgment or rejection.