Roselle Umlas
Growing up, I was pretty much alone most of the time. I liked holing up in my room, surrounded by books and seven stuffed toys I considered my best friends.
So, I’d always identified as an introvert. The funny thing is, when I was older and I told my friends this, they snorted with laughter and said, “Um, have you met yourself? I don’t think you have…”
Which made me think…maybe I’ve read it all wrong. Maybe there’s an extroverted side of me and I didn’t know it…
Today, thanks to the internet, I know that there’s a term for me and people like me – ambiverts. Ambiverts sit right in the middle of the spectrum between introversion and extroversion.
So, we have both an introvert and an extrovert side!
Curious to know if you’re the same? Here are 11 signs you’re the perfect blend of introverted and extroverted:
1) You’re an excellent listener and communicator
We all know that extroverts like to talk, and introverts prefer to listen. How about those who can do both effortlessly?
If that sounds like you, then you’re likely an ambivert. Which makes you an excellent conversationalist!
You know how to listen patiently and actively when someone’s speaking, and you’re great at sharing, too. The communication you hold with people is quite balanced, with a lot of give-and-take.
Speaking of which…
2) You like shining the spotlight on others, but you’re okay with being the center too
That’s right – even when it comes to attention, you’re quite balanced.
Consider this: extroverts love being the center of attention. In fact, some would say that extroverts tend to display attention-seeking behavior.
Meanwhile, true-blue introverts could never. They’d squirm and smile awkwardly whenever the spotlight turns to them. They’d do their best to redirect attention to someone else who welcomes it.
Well, you’re perfectly fine either way. The spotlight is something you’re okay with and without. No awkwardness, and no loudmouth behavior either.
If I may say so, being with someone like you is one of the pleasantest things in the world!
3) You can handle both small talk and deep conversations
This is another trait that makes you fun to talk to. It’s actually one of the things that, when I thought more deeply about it, first gave me an inkling that I’m not the introvert I think I am.
You see, it’s well-known that introverts hate small talk. I don’t.
I mean, I don’t love it – I’d prefer deep conversations, to be honest – but at the same time, I also don’t hate it.
You’ll know you’re the perfect blend of introversion and extroversion if you can talk about celebrity gossip or pop culture and, in the next breath, philosophy or spirituality.
4) You enjoy socializing but in controlled situations
Another sign that you’re an ambivert is if you do enjoy socializing. In fact, you can party hard.
But with a caveat – it needs to be in a controlled situation.
What does that mean?
It means that you thoroughly enjoy social gatherings if:
- It’s with a group of people you know well
- It’s an event at a familiar venue
- You have a clear idea of what the event involves
- You feel a sense of belonging and safety
Do you see the balance between introversion and extroversion there? It’s the perfect blend of fun and boundaries!
5) You need alone time but too much of it can make you feel lonely
By now, you’ll have noticed one overarching trait that keeps popping up – balance.
Like I said, if you’re an ambivert, you sit right in the middle of the spectrum!
So, you have that introvert’s need for solitude. You need alone time to recharge your batteries.
But at the same time, if it goes on too long, you begin to feel antsy, restless, and ultimately, lonely.
That’s your extrovert side pulling you back to the world of human interaction.
However, this push-pull dynamic is also why…
6) You get moments of indecisiveness
Have you ever had this moment? You think you want to stay home for the night and binge-watch a show, but then a friend calls asking you out for drinks.
And you feel…conflicted. Curling up on the couch sounds exquisite, but so does a night of chatting with friends and tossing back a few cocktails. What to do?
Well, that is the conundrum for ambiverts. It can take forever to make a decision because both options sound fantastic!
7) You’re comfortable working alone and in a group
In school or at work, do you notice your working style? Do you work best alone or in a group?
Or both? If yes, then that should tell you that you’re the perfect blend of introverted and extroverted.
I’m the same way. I work well alone, but I also enjoy collaborating and brainstorming with others.
I enjoy the freedom to make my own decisions, but I also love hearing what other people think and the camaraderie that comes with working together.
If that sounds like you, then you can probably relate to this next trait as well…
8) You’re pretty flexible
Flexibility – this is an ambivert’s superpower.
A rock concert? No problem.
A quiet dinner at a restaurant? Sounds fun, too!
Truth is, extroverts and introverts will always gravitate to their preferences. An extrovert will find that quiet dinner unbearably boring, and an introvert would be incredibly drained at loud events.
But as an ambivert, you have the ability to enjoy both these situations. You can stretch your emotional bandwidth in either direction, and you won’t feel much of a strain.
9) You have a sixth sense for balance
I know I’ve talked about balance all throughout, but now I’d like to get into it in terms of human interaction.
You see, as someone who’s both introverted and extroverted, you just seem to have a knack for balancing everything out.
When you’re with someone loud, you’ll be more toned down. If they’re the quiet type, you’ll let your extroverted side come out and bring more energy into the conversation.
I’ve observed this in myself as well. I seem to just instinctively know which side of me would make the situation more comfortable for everyone.
With my more extroverted friends, I tend to just sit back and listen. With the quiet and reserved ones, I talk more. Either way, I get to have fun!
10) People have different perceptions of you
This is perhaps the clearest sign you can get that you have both an introverted and extroverted side. Like I mentioned in the intro, that’s how I found out that I wasn’t 100% an introvert.
Different people see different sides of you, and this often leads to varying perceptions.
For example, your close friends might view you as outgoing and chatty, always up for a night out or a spontaneous adventure. They’ve seen you come alive and be the life of the party many, many times.
On the other hand, your colleagues or acquaintances might see you as more reserved, thoughtful, and introspective. Maybe in professional settings or less familiar environments, your introverted qualities come to the forefront.
If that’s not enough proof that you’re an ambivert, I don’t know what is.
I hope you see ambiversion for what it is – the ability to thrive and connect with others, no matter their personality!
Which brings me to my final point…
11) You have a diverse friend circle
Indeed, having both an extroverted and introverted side gives you a lot of versatility. You can connect with a wide variety of personalities.
On one hand, your introverted side allows you to relate to those who prefer deep, meaningful conversations and more subdued activities.
You understand the value of quiet moments and introspection, which draws you to people who have these values as well.
On the other hand, your extroverted traits draw you towards individuals who are outgoing and full of energy. You’re up for anything, which makes you quite an exciting person to be with.
The result is a diverse circle of friends, ranging from the quiet, contemplative types to the bold and adventurous ones.
As an ambivert, I’ve found that this gives me a distinct advantage. Because whatever mood I’m in, there’s always someone I can turn to for company!
Final thoughts
As you can see, being the perfect blend of introverted and extroverted has so many advantages.
You’re fluid, flexible, and absolutely relatable. You can fit in almost anywhere, whether it’s a lively party or a quiet coffee shop.
That said, remember that balance is key. You’re at your best when you have just the right amount of alone time and people-time.
As long as you honor that balance, you’ll be able to give the best of you to the people around you.
