When it comes to dating and relationships, people tend to look for physical attraction and an emotional connection to their partner. But what about intellectual compatibility?
The truth is that having a partner who shares your intellectual curiosity is just as important as physical chemistry.
What’s more, being able to have meaningful conversations with your partner can deepen your bond and provide a strong foundation for a lasting relationship.
Let’s take a look at 10 definite signs that you’re intellectually compatible with your partner.
1) You can spend the whole night just talking
That’s right, just talking and nothing else.
You’ll lie in bed next to each other talking about anything and everything. There’s just so much to say and not enough time to say it all!
You’ll get so engrossed in your conversation that before you know it, the sun will start to come out and you’ll realize you have to be at work in three hours!
But how is it that you can talk all night and not get tired? How is it that you don’t notice the hours passing by?
Because, when you’re engaged in a conversation that is mentally stimulating and enjoyable, your brain releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, which can create a sense of pleasure, making you forget about time.
2) You love the same books
Finding someone who likes the same type of literature is pretty great because you can recommend books to each other and have great long discussions about what you have read.
And yes, you guessed it, sometimes these conversations go on well into the night…
3) You travel for the same reasons
Now, some people travel because they like to spend all day at the beach and party all night.
Others do it because they like to explore and are looking for adventure.
You do it for the cultural experience.
When you travel to a new place, you and your partner make sure to learn about local customs and traditions, explore all the important historic sites, sample traditional cuisine, attend any festivals or other cultural events taking place, and get to know the locals.
You really try to immerse yourself in the local way of life to gain a deep appreciation of the country and its people.
And the best part?
You’re there for the same reasons so there are no arguments over who picks the next activity!
4) You appreciate each other’s sense of humor
Even if no one else does.
Yup, you and your partner have a very specific sense of humor that few people can appreciate.
It’s like a combination of dark humor, political incorrectness, and dry wit.
Good thing you guys are intellectually compatible and have found each other!
5) You have the same taste in movies and tv shows
Another sign that you’re intellectually compatible is not having to fight over the remote.
It doesn’t matter which one of you picks the movie or the TV show – it could be sci-fi or historical fiction – one thing’s for certain, you’ll both enjoy it because you have the same taste.
6) You both speak several languages
The fact that you and your partner are both polyglots is another thing you have in common.
And it’s no small thing considering that so many people out there only speak their mother tongue.
Maybe you even speak the same languages and like to pretend to be foreigners in your own country – just for kicks.
7) You share a communication style
Intellectual compatibility means that you and your partner can convey your thoughts and feelings to each other in an effective way.
This is really important for a happy and healthy relationship because good communication means fewer misunderstandings, fewer arguments, and overall fewer tears and hurt feelings.
It also means that when there’s something that you don’t agree on, you’re able to find a solution or compromise.
Sounds good, right?
8) You respect each other’s opinions
Look, intellectual compatibility doesn’t necessarily mean that you and your partner will agree on everything.
And that’s ok, it’s good even. I mean, think about how boring life would be if you agreed on absolutely everything.
What’s important is that even though you don’t always agree, you respect each other’s opinions and you’re able to understand each other’s perspectives.
That’s why you’re able to enjoy healthy debates and discussions without feeling like you need to convince the other person to see things your way and without getting into arguments.
9) You share similar interests
Whether you enjoy photography and your partner likes to paint, or you like visiting famous graveyards and they like checking-out old churches, you and your partner certainly share similar interests.
And do you know what?
It’s great when two people in a relationship share similar interests because it means that they’re better able to understand one another and because it gives them an opportunity to share their experiences.
10) You’re comfortable sitting quietly and contemplating
Here’s the thing about two people who are intellectually compatible – they can spend all night talking, but they can also share comfortable silences.
It means that there’s no awkwardness when you’re silent in each other’s company. You’re on the same mental wavelength and you don’t have the need to fill each second with talk.
When you have something to say, you’ll say it, but when you don’t, you’re just happy to be in your partner’s presence.
Why is it good to be intellectually compatible?
The truth is that you don’t have to be intellectually compatible to be in a healthy and happy relationship, but it’s definitely one of the reasons that many relationships work.
Here are the benefits of being intellectually compatible:
- It means that you can engage in deep and meaningful conversations with your partner.And why is that good?
Because it means that you can really get to know and understand one another.
Being intellectually compatible often results in a deeper connection and an increased level of intimacy in a relationship.
- It means that you’re likely to share the same values, beliefs, and interests which means more harmony in a relationship.You see when people aren’t quite so compatible, they are more likely to get into arguments and may have a hard time compromising.
- It’s great to be with someone who stimulates your brain as much as they stimulate your … well… other areas.
It means that you have someone who gets you and is able to challenge your way of thinking and inspire you to develop and grow.
- Finally, it leads to a greater overall sense of happiness and fulfillment in your relationship.You feel seen, understood, and appreciated and therefore, happier.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
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