10 signs you’re in a healthy relationship (even if it doesn’t feel like it)

Just like a beautiful garden, a great relationship needs time, effort, and regular maintenance to stay vibrant. Determining if a relationship is built to last or just a fleeting infatuation can be one tricky puzzle to solve! 

To see that you are in a healthy relationship with your significant other, watch out for these 10 common signs. Even if it may not seem that way, these signs assure the real value of your relationship.

1) Thinking about each other often when apart

A healthy relationship entails partners who keep each other in their thoughts even when distance separates them. This meaningful connection goes beyond physical presence; it’s a deep bond of mutual understanding and respect.

If you’re thinking of addiction, well, it’s quite different.

Addiction’s an unhealthy obsession with someone, while in a healthy relationship, your partner will never make you feel like they own you!

For example, if you’re with a family member or scrolling on your phone, there’s an unmistakable feeling of someone missing from the frame.

This kind of thoughtfulness and yearning to be reunited are clear signs of a healthy and successful relationship.

2) Expressing vulnerability

Healthy communication in a romantic relationship involves sharing a ton of thoughts, feelings, and experiences, regardless of the relationship’s age or stage.

With your closeness, you’re able to discuss even the most challenging topics without holding back, confident you won’t face judgment or retaliation from one another.

With shared trust, your walls are down.

This is a good sign that you’re not shouldering your burdens alone; your mental health and own needs are being attended to. This acknowledgement enables you to share your struggles, and gain the support that you need.

Sharing both your good and bad thoughts with your partner creates that security that strengthens your relationship. Whether it’s through tears or laughter, vulnerability brings assurance.

3) Having separate interests and hobbies

Having different interests or hobbies from your partner doesn’t mean you’re not a great match.

In fact, they celebrate their individuality, acknowledge their different needs, and embrace their separate interests.

Spending time with friends, pursuing hobbies, or engaging in activities without the other does not mean that one is giving up on the relationship—it actually strengthens it.

Even in a new relationship, you bring a unique flavor into the mix of your relationship rather than feeling like everything revolves around only one person. This balance prevents codependency as you grow and thrive outside your relationship.

Variety is the spice of life, after all. 

4) Honest and open communication

Openness and honesty are the cornerstones of every strong relationship. Creating a safe space for your partner to share thoughts and emotions without fear of criticism is crucial. It allows for tackling any issue honestly and with care, no matter how big or small.

Honest communication is key, even during disagreements with your partner. It shows that you care about and respect their opinions in the relationship.

Spending time talking to your partner will avoid any dissatisfaction that will end up in an unhealthy relationship.

So, next time, if you think your relationship needs work, assess the communication you have in your relationship, regardless of how you feel. It’s crucial for building a strong bond.

5) Being able to disagree without fighting

Having disagreements and misunderstandings with your partner is normal. It’s okay to have differing perspectives.

Yours isn’t a one-sided relationship, but negotiations are part of the deal. No stonewalling, no silent treatments—you’re both willing to work through your differences for the sake of your relationship.

You see, a healthy relationship doesn’t require complete agreement on everything. In fact, learning to agree to disagree can be a sign of strength between two people. Of course, this doesn’t mean that disagreements should turn into arguments or shouting matches.

If both can communicate respectfully and empathetically, it’s a sign of emotional health in a relationship.

Building a relationship this way not only leads to growth and compromise but also shows your commitment to making it stronger and healthier.

6) There is no resentment after disagreements

Related to my earlier point, going through a rough patch of constant fighting can get you to question your relationship status. Naturally, nobody desires to be involved in a toxic relationship.

So if you feel like you’re in a rut and an unhealthy relationship, do a temp check of your empathy levels.

Your relationship’s success depends on the empathy between partners. If both can let go of resentment after disagreements, it’s a sign of strength. Plus, there’s no imbalance where one partner constantly apologizes or holds grudges.

It’s natural to feel hurt after a disagreement, but healthy to move forward together without negative feelings.

Both partners must be able to forgive and move on from arguments without bringing them up later. 

Trust me, if you experience this with your relationship, you’re likely in a healthy one.

7) Respecting each other’s boundaries

Dating can be tricky in the age of social media! Building trust is difficult, but setting and respecting boundaries demonstrates your care and value for your partner. 

Ultimately, this strengthens relationships and fosters trust to overcome any hurdle.

This can be as simple as checking in with each other before texting an ex or understanding when they want time alone to recharge. 

Consider how your partner respects your boundaries if you’re unsure about your relationship.

For example, if you know that your partner will drop the topic when you ask them, or how they are comfortable discussing things with you, it’s a sign of emotional intelligence and respect.

If you feel your space and boundaries are respected, your relationship’s likely headed on the right path.

8) You’re self-conscious about your relationship intimacy

Intimate relationships need a lot of time for discovery. 

And when I say intimate, I mean sexual activity.

In a healthy relationship, feeling unashamed or awkward about being with your partner indicates a positive dynamic.

Weird as it may be, knowing that you’re always comfortable when getting intimate with your partner is a sign of trust and love.

You’ll let go of your reservations and grow closer together. You’re also mindful of sexual boundaries with your partner in physical intimacy.

In a healthy relationship, you must both feel comfortable sharing your desires – it’s like a secret handshake that only you two can fully understand!

Besides, your sex life should be a consensual activity that both of you enjoy, without any pressure or insecurity. 

Now, this kind of vulnerability is a sign of strength and maturity and a good indication that your partnership’s healthy.

9) Jealousy still creeps in a healthy way

Jealousy in a romantic relationship is a red flag only when taken out of context. But in a healthy one, jealousy is managed and usually expressed through communication. 

It’s totally fine to feel a little jealous in a relationship! It happens when you’re apart or when communication isn’t at its best. 

But before you open up about it, remember this: expressing jealousy can hurt or threaten your partner.

Instead, see it as proof of your mutual affection and desire to understand each other on a deeper level. After all, love is a wild ride.

A strong relationship is built on trust, love, and respect – qualities that shine even brighter when jealousy lurks around.

10) Understanding and respecting each other’s love language

To keep a relationship healthy, you must respect and understand your partner’s love language. in

In the first place, love languages are ways to express and receive love, like words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. 

It goes beyond your body language whether or not your partner’s having a bad day. It’s about spending much time understanding the subtle nuances of your partner’s behavior.

Respecting your partner’s love language means respecting their preferences. Avoid imposing your own onto them, and aim to create balance. This creates harmony and understanding, making both individuals feel supported, respected, and loved.

Your relationship can stand the test of time if you recognize and appreciate each other’s love language. 

Honestly, it may feel overwhelming to manage daily.

But it’ll make a huge impact on building trust and strengthening intimacy in your partnership. 

Both of you will be a better person as you make your own choices for love. 

Final Thoughts

No relationship is perfect, and life’s challenges can create doubts. But if you see these signs, it’s a good indication that you both are taking care of your partnership.

Even if it doesn’t feel like it on some days, your thoughts never go toward the end of the relationship.

Rather than dwelling on mistakes, take the chance to learn and grow together. As your relationship evolves, your appreciation for your partner only deepens.

Simply put, they mean everything to you.

The bond you share is unbreakable, and the growth you experience together only makes it stronger. 

Of course, all this takes time. But your emotional intimacy will make your long-term relationship a keeper for all the right reasons. 

Frankie Pascua-dela Pasion

Frankie was born and raised in Manila, Philippines. She is a graduate of Humanities from the University of Asia and the Pacific.

Frankie is a seasoned Customer Success and Human Resources professional. She is also a certified Life Coach and Career Strategist. She helps people young and young at heart to simplify their lives by creating emotional awareness. She also loves working with people who have a genuine interest in breaking their inner limits through their journey of self-discovery and authenticity in their personal and professional lives.

Frankie’s recent venture into writing is fueled by her passion for human connection and meaningful relationships at home, at work, and basically everywhere. She enjoys the research, discovery, and reflection that go into each article as much as she writes about them, in the hopes that her words resonate with, and give perspective to her audience.

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