8 signs you’re becoming the person you were meant to be, according to psychology

Living your life with purpose is key to being happy and fulfilled.

A popular quote attributed to Mark Twain states that “the two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.”

But what if it takes you longer than expected to identify the why in this equation?

Are you just drifting aimlessly through life?

Not exactly.

Every decision you make brings you one step closer to discovering your true self.

Plus, there are ways to tell if the path you’re on is the correct one.

Here are 8 signs you’re becoming the person you were meant to be, according to psychology.

Keep up the good work.

1) You’re self-aware

Being self-aware is a big sign that you’re questioning your existence and slowly molding yourself into who you want to be.

People who embrace self-awareness “feel empowered as they begin to see themselves and their impact more clearly,” according to psychology.

The more you understand yourself, the more likely you are to figure out what makes you tick and how you can tweak your routine to better align with what you want to accomplish.

Some people go through life without any clue as to why they do the things they do and whether those things benefit them.

They chase goals society tells them they should chase.

Get a well-paid job, start a family, buy a house, provide for your loved ones.

Even when they accomplish those goals, they feel restless and empty – because perhaps that’s not what they wanted in the first place?

Maybe instead of chasing that well-paid job, they would have been better off pursuing less lucrative, yet more fulfilling avenues like art.

Maybe instead of buying a house, they would have been happier buying a campervan and traveling the world.  

Self-aware people, in contrast, know who they are, what they value, and what they stand for.

Being one of them is reason enough to celebrate. 

2) You stay true to who you are

Not only do you know who you are, but you stay true to that person, even when life gets tough.

It’s another sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be, and psychologists agree with this statement.

Multiple studies found that authentic people are much happier with their lives and have higher self-esteem.

One of the values I care most about is freedom. I like to be able to design my day, my week, my month however I want.

In other words, I hate being tied down to a traditional, 9-to-5 job. It’s one of the reasons I became a freelance content writer.

Before this, I worked as a journalist for a little over five years, with a hectic schedule that left little time for leisure.

I then overcorrected and opted for a full-time, on-site job with a small agency.

After a few months, I began to hate the strict schedule. The rigidity felt claustrophobic.

I couldn’t understand:

• Why I had to go into the office every day when I could have done the work from home
• Why it mattered whether I wrote an article in the morning or at night as long as I met the required deadlines
• Why I had to continue to stay at the office for the whole 8 hours if my work for the day was done

I started to freelance on the side and, when the time was right, quit that job to pursue a freelance career.

Last year, I went through my biggest freelance slumps since I embarked on this adventure. 

For a couple of months, I couldn’t find enough work to cover my bills.

I was so stressed that I was tempted to try and join the corporate world once again.

Looking back, I’m glad I resisted that impulse.

Things eventually worked out, and I would have been miserable if I caved. I would have betrayed who I am to my very core.

Sure, we are sometimes forced to make sacrifices in the name of financial security.

But when you are dedicated to staying true to who you are, you’re more likely to work harder to avoid that.

3) You reflect on where you want to go

Reflecting on your long-term goals indicates a proactive engagement with your own development.

You’re not living in survival mode, only interested in making it from one day to the next.

You are trying to come up with a clear idea of what you want to achieve in life and a plan to get it.

According to psychology, one of the biggest advantages of introspection is increased happiness.

If you’re motivated and determined to go after what you want, your confidence grows.

You begin to feel like you’re working towards something.

Like you’re not wasting your life accepting the bare minimum.

It’s a high that will take you farther than you might expect.

4) You have a sense of belonging

Psychologists found a positive link between having a sense of belonging and your overall well-being.

It’s easy to see why.

A sense of belonging indicates that you have found a place or community where you can authentically be yourself without fear of judgment or rejection.

You have a support network that provides comfort and encouragement.

As you feel safe and appreciated, you are more inclined to explore new interests and develop new skills.

You’ve found your tribe, and they’ll have your back no matter what.

That’s truly wonderful.

5) You have healthy relationships

Speaking of having a solid support system, another sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be is that your relationships are healthy.

As everyone who has ever had to deal with toxic individuals knows, those relationships suck up a lot of time and energy.

They prevent your personal growth and rob you of joy and fulfillment.

Healthy relationships, on the other hand, are built on mutual respect, trust, and open communication.

It’s easier to reflect on who you are and where you want to go when no one is holding you back from becoming a better version of yourself.

6) You realize you can’t please everyone

As a recovering people pleaser, learning to say “no” made a huge impact on my journey of self-development.

Back in the day, I put my needs last. I focused on everyone else’s to ensure that people weren’t secretly mad at me or, worst case scenario, hated my guts.  

Now, I know that someone hating my guts isn’t a big deal.

Despite my winning personality (wink), not everyone will like me, and I’m okay with that.

Setting boundaries freed up so much time for me to pursue my goals and cultivate self-compassion.

According to psychology, an essential trait of a people pleaser is that they “go with the flow that’s dictated by others.”

Once you realize you can’t please everyone, you find your own flow.

It’s a big step in the right direction.

7) You have a growth mindset

Having a growth mindset is a surefire sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be.

You can live a more meaningful existence by embracing challenges and being committed to life-long learning, according to psychology.

That’s exactly what having a growth mindset means:

• Rather than avoiding difficult tasks or situations, you approach them with a sense of curiosity
• You understand that mastery and achievement require sustained effort
• You don’t give up at the first obstacle
• You see failure as a natural part of the learning process
• You actively seek out opportunities for self-improvement
• You are willing to invest time and energy into your goals

Having a growth mindset makes you get out of your comfort zone.

Once you understand that you can achieve almost anything you set your mind to, you’re halfway there.

8) You take responsibility for your life

Taking responsibility for your life marks a shift from passivity to agency, from victimhood to empowerment.

It’s a fundamental aspect of becoming the person you were meant to be.

You aren’t able to control everything, because the universe has a funny way of repeatedly reminding us who’s in charge.

But even when the unexpected happens, you can control how you react to the curveballs life throws your way.

According to Alex Lickerman, M.D., “The degree of control we have over how we respond to what happens to us is far greater than we often realize and it remains the key to our happiness.”

When you take responsibility for your life you acknowledge that your actions and decisions have consequences, and you accept accountability for the outcomes.

More importantly, you realize that you create your destiny, as cheesy as that may sound.

It’s the moment you stop being a passive bystander in your own life.

It’s also when you start making positive changes that will eventually take you wherever you need to go.

Bottom line

Following your calling is the only way to maximize your potential and become the person you were meant to be.

Even if you’re not 100% sure about your purpose yet, as long as the signs above apply to you, you’re on the right track.

Trust the process.

Soon, the nagging feeling that something is missing from your life will vanish, replaced by a feeling of contentment and awe.