Being a strong woman is an ideal we all aspire to. We want to live life on our own terms in a world that’s constantly telling us we’re not good enough.
I know that’s easier said than done. After all, it isn’t easy to stop worrying about what other people think.
But that’s a skill truly strong women have mastered. Do you know what that looks like?
In this article, I’ll show you ten signs you’re a strong woman who doesn’t need validation from others. If you see yourself on this list, give yourself a pat on the back – you’re on the right track!
1) You have a strong sense of self
The first sign that you’re a strong woman who doesn’t need validation from others is this – you know who you are, what you believe in, and what you want out of life.
Not many people can say this. All too often, we jump on the bandwagon and go along with the flow simply because 1) it’s easier, or 2) we don’t know what we think.
Let me tell you about my friend Elisa. She is an artist who loves creating strange, dreamlike scenes that are beautiful but a bit hard to understand.
When she was just starting out and trying to sell her art, people would say, “It’s too weird, just paint nature landscapes, those are really sellable!”
Do you think Elisa listened to them? Nope.
She had her own vision, and she stood by it no matter what people said. She firmly believed that somewhere out there, her art would resonate with someone.
True enough, her work sparked the interest of an art gallery owner who decided to exhibit her work. To make the long story short, the exhibit attracted people who found her work fascinating.
My point is, strong women who don’t need validation from others don’t get trapped in groupthink. They accept other people’s opinions, but they don’t easily get swayed by them.
This leads me to my next point…
2) You don’t feel the need to impress others
I know women (and men, too) who’ve gone broke buying designer stuff to impress other people. And I always wonder why they would go to that extent.
You see, when you’re a strong woman with a healthy sense of self-esteem, you won’t feel like you have to fit in or impress people.
You’ll wear what feels comfortable and authentic to you, whether it’s a pair of overalls or a bold, colorful outfit you picked out from a thrift store.
And you won’t go around bragging about your accomplishments, too. You’re perfectly content letting your work speak for itself.
3) You embrace your imperfections
One big part of not feeling that need to impress others is the ability to be vulnerable. And that can only happen if you embrace your imperfections.
I think being able to do this really shows that you’re strong and confident, that you’re owning your flaws and loving yourself for who you are.
You don’t feel the need to appear perfect all the time, and that gives you the emotional bandwidth to take risks, make mistakes, and live life on your own terms!
4) You trust your own emotions and judgment
Learning to tolerate uncertainty is a big challenge, but it’s a natural part of risk-taking. It’s something I myself really used to struggle with.
I’m someone who likes to have a plan and feel in control of things, so uncertainty can be really unsettling.
But it’s something I needed to overcome if I wanted to be stronger and stop needing validation from the world.
One thing that’s helped me is focusing on what I can control and letting go of what I can’t.
For example, when I was going through a difficult time in my life, I realized that I couldn’t control everything that was happening, but I could control how I responded to it.
This helped me feel more empowered and less reliant on validation or approval from others.
If you already trust your own judgment, then you’ve got this! You’re a strong woman who can stand up to what society thinks is best for you!
5) You have healthy boundaries
Speaking of trusting your judgment, you also know how to set proper boundaries that work for you.
One of the misconceptions about setting boundaries is that people won’t want to be in your life anymore. But that’s really only because boundaries take some getting used to.
You’ve been doing things one way this whole time, and now you’re switching up the game. So, it’s only natural that the people around you would feel a bit uncomfortable at first.
But you don’t mind that – you don’t mind if someone gets hurt or offended by your boundaries. Because you know that boundaries are essential to your peace.
And you know what? If someone fades out of your life because they can’t stand your boundaries, then so be it. You’ve just weeded out someone you don’t need in your life, and that’s always a good thing!
6) You’re not afraid to say no
Having healthy boundaries includes knowing when to say no to things that don’t serve you.
As women, this can be incredibly hard to do. We’re forever getting pulled in so many directions; we’ve got a lot of roles to juggle, whether we like it or not!
Saying “no” can be tough, especially when you’re used to seeking validation from others.
I used to feel guilty about saying “no” to social events or outings with friends, even if I didn’t really want to go.
But I’ve learned that it’s better to be honest with myself and my friends about what I want and need. It helps to remind myself that it’s okay to prioritize my own needs and goals.
And the beauty of it is that the more practice I had saying no, the more confident I became. It really is a word that unlocks your independent streak!
7) You’re fiercely independent
Say goodbye to that “damsel in distress” scene and all that. You’re a queen who knows how to get what she wants in life!
See, you’ve done the inner work to learn how to trust your instincts. You’ve nourished your soul, so you have a healthy sense of self. You understand that you are in the driver’s seat, and you won’t let anyone subject you to backseat driving.
What does that all add up to? You can make tough decisions without needing anyone else’s input.
However, that doesn’t mean you don’t value other people’s feedback, as the next section shows…
8) You can take criticism
I remember when I was in college, I had a professor who was really tough on me – he would always give me harsh feedback on my assignments and push me to do better.
At first, I was really hurt by his criticism, but over time I started to see it as an opportunity to improve. I started taking his feedback seriously and using it to make my work better.
By the end of the semester, I had really grown as a writer and researcher.
Here’s the deal: strong women know that being able to accept criticism needs a certain level of humility.
People who want to project an image that they’re perfect, who want to impress others…they find it hard to accept feedback.
But if you aren’t bothered with such things, you’ll actually welcome feedback. You know that it’s necessary to keep yourself growing and reaching your full potential.
9) You don’t get burdened by “milestones” and expectations
“You’re already in your 30s, why are you still single?”
“You should have your own home by the time you’re 35.”
“Why aren’t you having kids? That’s insane!”
Do these sound familiar to you? These are just some ways society gives us the “shoulds and should-nots” of life.
I think this is pretty much a recipe for an unhappy life. These expectations put so much pressure on us, and we feel like we’re failing if we don’t hit these standards.
But as a strong woman, you pay no mind to this. You’ve got your own timeline and your own idea of what your life should look like. And if society doesn’t agree with you, then that’s not your problem.
10) You don’t compare yourself to others
Finally, we get to comparison, the universal thief of joy. That’s the problem with all these expectations and milestones I’ve discussed above – they serve as benchmarks with which to compare ourselves with others.
I’m sure you’ve compared yourself to others at one point in your life – it’s just human nature. But if you’re a strong woman, you know better than that by now.
The good thing is, because you don’t need validation from others, you don’t really worry about how you’re faring compared to them. You just stay in your corner and do your thing, pursuing your own idea of success.
In fact, instead of feeling jealous or insecure when someone you know has a huge accomplishment, you celebrate along with them. That’s always a mark of a strong woman!
As you can see, being a strong woman who doesn’t need validation from others is a powerful way to live your life. You’re free to pursue your passions. You have the mental and emotional energy to shut out the world’s noise and focus only on what matters to you.
So keep being the strong, amazing woman you are, and remember – you don’t need anyone else to tell you that you’re awesome!