Lily Gareth
One commonly held misconception about intelligent individuals is that they have everything in order – excelling in their careers, maintaining fulfilling relationships, and continually progressing.
But here’s the twist: It’s often overlooked that many intelligent people grapple with low self-esteem, making it a real challenge for them to navigate life.
If you identify with the following six signs, you might just be one of those brainy individuals battling with smarts that come with a side of insecurity.
1) You’re an overthinker
Intelligent people often struggle to attain the inner peace and happiness that many people seem to enjoy effortlessly due to their hyperactive minds.
Their heightened self-awareness and acute perception of the world lead them to a constant analysis of their motivations and actions, as well as those of people around them.
This internal scrutiny becomes particularly draining when coupled with their low self-esteem.
Because they’re usually perfectionists but still doubt themselves, smart people would visit a problem from all angles, trying to find the best solution.
Not only that, but they also turn inwards and overthink their own ‘shortcomings.’
This habit frequently plunges them into mental whirlpools, ultimately leaving them tired and sometimes even paralyzed.
If you often catch yourself overthinking, stuck in a loop of self-reflection, and constantly analyzing everything without a clear sense of when or how to take action, there’s a good chance you’re an intelligent person dealing with self-doubt.
2) You see shades of gray
If you’re an overthinker and often find yourself stuck in decision-making mode, stressing over choices big or small, you’re not alone!
As I said, highly intelligent people are perfectionists, especially when it comes to making the right decision.
You don’t see life in simple black or white but navigate through endless shades of gray. Issues and situations are nuanced and complex, and addressing them is neither simple nor straightforward.
The outcome?
You often take your sweet time at a crossroads. Toss in a bit of self-doubt, and suddenly, you’re stuck in decision paralysis.
3) You’re self-critical
If you’re a perfectionist dealing with insecurities, it’s pretty clear that you tend to be quite challenging on yourself.
The standards you set for yourself are sky-high.
Being highly intelligent, you always strive to perfect how you navigate life.
However, the lack of self-compassion that folks with low self-esteem often face means that your inner critic gets extra loud whenever a mistake is made, or you realize you could’ve handled something better.
You end up giving yourself a hard time constantly.
On top of that, because you’re self-aware, you’re well aware of your limitations. You genuinely believe that you can attain perfection by constantly assessing yourself, identifying flaws, and working on them.
But here’s the kicker – this self-evaluation can often lead to being overly self-critical, so it’s easy to get stuck fixating on the negatives.
4) You feel like an outsider
Have you ever felt that you’re the odd one out around people?
Perhaps you spent all your younger years feeling left out and not really able to mingle and connect effortlessly.
Smart individuals often sense that they don’t quite fit into the typical crowd, and in many cases, they genuinely don’t.
Their take on life is this deep, curious journey that takes conversations to all sorts of places, making it a bit of a challenge for people to keep up with.
Now, for these intelligent folks like you, who also deal with self-doubt, the struggle is real in social situations, especially when small talk is required.
You can’t keep superficial, mind-numbing conversations about the weather and such.
At the same time, you fear that you might seem awkward if you speak up or, worse, bore the pants off everyone or fail to spark any interest.
Sadly, this fear often becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and you end up feeling like an outsider and becoming one, too.
5) You hold your tongue
Feeling like the odd one out in social situations doesn’t mean you have nothing valuable to bring. In fact, smart folks often see things way ahead of the curve.
Their minds are like pattern-spotting machines with top-notch problem-solving skills.
The catch?
If you’re wrestling with keeping a positive self-image, you might hold back from sharing those brilliant theories or insights, worried about being mocked or getting it wrong.
Take my friend, for example.
Throw him in a room with a film or ask him his take on the region’s political developments, and he’s practically got a crystal ball.
The thing is, at gatherings, he doesn’t utter a word, regardless of the topic at hand. He keeps all his insights to himself unless I give him a little nudge and encourage him to say what’s on his mind.
I can’t help but wonder why someone with so much valuable input feels like their thoughts aren’t worth sharing. On the flip side, some folks might not know much about a topic, but they can’t stop talking nonsense.
6) You shy away from compliments
When grappling with low self-esteem, you tend to undervalue yourself, often overlooking the potential and achievements that might be glaringly obvious to others.
Even if you were at the top of your class, you’re an excellent manager, a great partner, or a parent, you find it hard to accept compliments because you struggle to believe they’re true.
You generally find yourself uneasy when put under the spotlight, especially if this spotlight is highlighting a positive attribute in you.
Final thoughts
Remember, the way you see yourself isn’t carved in stone – it’s totally changeable!
Please take a second look at your thought patterns and how you perceive yourself and the world, but try doing it with a fresh perspective of self-love, tolerance, and assertiveness.
Reshaping those long-held, unhealthy self-images takes some practice, but it’s absolutely doable.
And if that feels like a lot to handle, chatting with a therapist you’re comfortable with can work wonders.
Being smart also means knowing when to ask for help, after all.
