Tina Fey
Independence is one of the greatest powers a woman can have.
A strong, independent woman can think for herself. She takes up space, stands up for what she believes in, and doesn’t care about fitting herself into a mold society has created for her.
That being said, if you consider yourself an independent woman, your independence doesn’t depend on your relationship status.
Rather, it solely depends on you – your energy, accomplishments, and values.
These are 10 signs of an independent woman – which you may already have – but if you can’t relate or if being independent is something that you aspire to be, then this list is a good place to start.
1) You Take Responsibility for Your Own Happiness
A strong, independent woman doesn’t rely on other people and external factors for her own happiness — she’s perfectly fine on her own.
She can take herself out on dates, eat on her own, and watch movies without anyone else without being afraid of showing it.
She doesn’t seek the company of others nor does she need a certain status to feel fulfilled.
She takes responsibility for pretty much everything: If she wants money, she finds a job; if she wants a partner, she makes sure that she doesn’t settle; if she’s been wanting a family, she makes sure that she’s ready for one.
That said, knowing what makes you happy takes a certain amount of self-reflection.
You need to find the strength to step away from everything and everyone that is taking away your positive energy.
2) You Are Financially Stable
Gone are the days when women weren’t allowed to hold down a job.
As an independent woman, you’re in complete control of your finances even if you aren’t earning as much as your male counterparts do.
You know how much money you have, when your bills are due and have set financial goals.
You aren’t waiting for some “rich guy” to come along and save the day. If anything, there’s no problem with you footing the entire bill.
Pro tip: Live as if you’ll die tomorrow, plan as if you’ll live forever.
While you might be saving for the far-off future, don’t forget to enjoy the present, the people, and the things you already have.
Likewise, don’t be so carefree to the point that you forget to think of your future self.
3) You’re Confident About Your Looks
Many women live with a certain degree of insecurity with their appearance, may that be due to society’s beauty standards or personal aesthetic goals.
A strong woman doesn’t engage in negative self-talk but, trust me, it’s a tough act.
You have to constantly remind yourself about what your body can do, not what it looks like. Look at its beauty. Focus on gratitude.
You don’t need constant validation – whether it’s likes on social media, comments on your posts, or compliments from friends – although it won’t hurt to receive a few compliments once in a while.
But, of course, you also don’t disregard self-care. You make time for exercise, quality sleep, a healthy diet, as well as other rejuvenation activities.
4) You Cherish Your Alone Time
You don’t wait for someone to come along and hold your hand while you do your groceries, watch a movie, or take a walk — your own company is enough.
In fact, you use your alone time as an advantage – you know what to do to recharge, figure out why your mind’s been clouded, and understand why you haven’t been feeling fulfilled lately.
A lot of my independent friends, despite being in a relationship, make an active effort to do some activities on their own.
They’ve made the mistake of being overly dependent on their partners in the past.
As a result, they’ve forgotten to have a sense of self; they forgot how it feels to be themselves because they made their relationship a big part of their personality.
5) You Choose Your Friendships Carefully
There is some truth in the saying, “You’re the average of the five people you’re mostly surrounded by.”
When you’ve reached a certain level of independence, you start to realize that you should only spend time, energy, and effort on mutually beneficial relationships.
No more one-way streets.
This is your sign to let go of a relationship that’s been draining you all these years.
If you have a friend that only knows how to complain or a relative who only talks to you to ask for money, you know what to do – please do yourself a favor.
6) You Don’t Need a Man to Feel Complete
Self-love is a silent battle we all fight. Nevertheless, if you can value yourself, your time, and who you are, you won’t rely on anyone else – or even a man – to tell you your worth.
You never settle for anything less than what you deserve.
You also hold no fear or bitterness towards people who have found the love of their life. You’re happy for them and confident with the current trajectory your life is on.
And as much as I like to call myself a strong, independent woman that needs no man, I know that I also deserve to be loved.
I cringe as I reminisce about the days when I would be in a relationship just for the sake of it.
Take it from me – you don’t just want to be someone’s one-night stand, girlfriend, or wife.
You want to find a life partner – someone you can build a life with, not someone you’ll build your life around.
7) You Know How to Walk Away From an Unhealthy Situation
An independent woman knows that walking away from an unhealthy situation is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Whether it’s a toxic relationship, hostile friendship, or soul-sucking job, you know when it’s time to go the other way and not look back.
You don’t even have to explain yourself.
Strong women also know when to hold their ground when it comes to hard decisions.
They take a step back, look at things from a logical perspective, then weigh up the options.
They also have the strength that very few possess: the power of saying “no.”
8) You Own Your Opinions
As an independent person, you know when to speak up and when to back down.
You call someone out – respectfully – for their horrible attitude, the way they’re treating another person, or whenever their behavior is out of line, even if it risks your displeasure.
You don’t let people get off the hook.
When you own your opinions, it’s a sign of independence in itself; it shows that you don’t blindly follow the pack or the status quo.
At the same time, you know how to listen to other perspectives and can recognize when they’re right.
Your worldview is flexible and not something set in stone — but this isn’t to say you don’t have standards, it’s just that you’re open-minded.
9) You Gravitate Towards Change and Challenge
You’re never done. Never perfect. Never finished. You’re always up for a challenge, looking for avenues to go outside your comfort zone because you know that’s where growth starts.
You work on yourself endlessly. You’re not afraid of doing the hard work, but at the same time, you’re also smart enough to know that your risks are calculated.
There are some compromising situations that aren’t worth the hassle or possible dangers.
This trait reminds me of one of my dearest, most independent friends that I’ve known since time immemorial. You’ll never see her content with just lying in bed for an entire weekend.
She’s always looking for the next adventure – the next mountain to climb, the next country to explore, the next skill to learn – but she never forgets to stop and appreciate the view.
She acknowledges how far she’s come in life every time she gets the chance.
10) You Have Goals
Goals are what keep us going each and every day, may they be momentous achievements or small victories.
But there’s no denying that life can be unpredictable.
For some, when they hit a roadblock or see a need to change their goals, they’re unable to pivot and start crashing down.
A strong, independent woman simply takes side steps — she recalibrates her objectives and sets up a new path to success.
Concrete plans are what spells the difference between those who achieve their greatest desires and those with goals that stay as words written down on paper.
Strong and independent women do the work to make their “one day” turn into “day one.”
If they want a house, they have a specific year in mind as to when they’ll get the keys to their front door.
If they want to learn a skill, there’s a timeframe. She always has a master plan.
Strength and independence come from within.
Becoming the type of woman I have just described takes a lot of time, practice, and introspection. It’s a long, winding process.
You may have to let go of self-limiting beliefs and take some risks here and there.
Figure out in which areas you need to become more independent in so that you can reclaim your power.
Just keep in mind that others’ opinions don’t matter. Focus on you.
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