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Has your girlfriend cheated in the past? 15 signs you may have ignored

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It’s always shocking to find out that the woman you love has been unfaithful.

You may have ignored signs of her cheating in the past, but now it’s too late and she’s already done it again.

If you don’t know how to tell if a girl cheated in the past, read along. We’ll discuss 15 warning signs you should watch for so that you can identify if your girlfriend’s a cheater.

1) She gets reactive when asked about her past relationships

Talking about past relationships can be a touchy subject for many people, but it’s a healthy conversation to have.

In fact, sharing stories about your exes can help you understand your current partner better.

However, if your girlfriend gets visibly angry and defensive, and tries to shut down the conversation when asked about her past relationships, it could be a sign that she’s hiding something.

How can this be a sign that she cheated in the past? Well, if she’s been unfaithful in the past, she may be worried that you’ll find out about her infidelity.

What, then, would you think of her?

Listen, men, in general, view cheating as one of the biggest relationship deal breakers there is. It’s a huge betrayal of trust, and it can be really tough to forgive.

So, if your girlfriend gets defensive when asked about her past relationships, it’s definitely worth doing some further digging to see what she’s hiding.

Try to subtly bring up the topic of cheating in different contexts.

For example, if she’s talking about a movie or TV show that involves infidelity, ask her what she thinks about it.

If she reacts negatively or tries to change the subject, then there’s a good chance that she cheated in the past and is still feeling guilty about it.

If your gut feeling is telling you that something isn’t right and you feel your girlfriend cheated in the past, think about whether or not you’re able to move past the hurtful idea.

If you’re not able to, don’t rush into ending things. Take a step back and rethink your relationship.

Have a chat with your best friend or seek professional help. They can help you navigate through these tricky waters and give you some guidance on what to do next.

2) She has a sudden change in personality

If your girlfriend cheated in the past,  you may start to notice a sudden change in her personality.

What does that mean?

Well, if she was once bubbly and outgoing but has now become withdrawn and secretive, that could be a sign that something is up. If she was always a bit of a homebody, but now suddenly wants to go out clubbing every night, that could be another sign.

Similarly, if your normally sweet girlfriend has suddenly turned into a ball of anger, it could be because she’s feeling guilty about something that she did in the past.

If you’re seeing any major changes in your girlfriend’s personality, pay attention. It’s definitely worth taking the time to investigate what’s going on.

You must be wondering: how is cheating in the past related to a sudden change in personality?

Well, cheating can often lead to someone feeling a range of emotions – from guilt and shame to anger and resentment.

So if your girlfriend is suddenly exhibiting signs that she’s feeling any of these things, it could be because she cheated in the past.

What can you do?

If you’re seeing these tell-tale signs in your girlfriend, the first thing you should do is have a conversation with her. Ask her if she’s been feeling different lately, and see if she’ll open up to you about what’s going on.

If she doesn’t want to talk about it, then that could be a major red flag.

It may be that she’s not ready to face what she did, and that could mean that there are still some unresolved issues from her past cheating episode.

3) She becomes more secretive

If girls start doing their own thing and become more secretive, it could be a sign that they’re up to something.

They may suddenly start omitting interesting aspects of their day. They could also start making up more excuses to avoid being around you.

So if your girlfriend’s trying to hide something, there’s a good chance that she’s been unfaithful in the past.

Don’t get me wrong. People in relationships don’t need to know everything that’s happening with their partners. Sometimes, a little mystery can add to the mystique of a relationship.

In fact,  it could be argued that a certain level of secrecy is healthy in a relationship.

But if your girlfriend becomes more secretive to the point where she’s practically hiding everything, then there may be cause for concern.

You see, cheaters often feel the need to hide their affairs from those they love. So if your girlfriend is suddenly becoming more secretive, it’s definitely worth investigating further.

Cheating can take on many different forms, so it’s important to be aware of all the signs that your girlfriend may have cheated.

If there’s a good reason for you to have other suspicions and are worried that your partner has been unfaithful, don’t hesitate to bring it up and talk about it. Question her fidelity. Confront her about them.

The sooner you address the issue, the easier it will be to move on from it.

Remember, trust is essential in any relationship, so don’t be afraid to ask your girlfriend some tough questions if you think something may be going on.

4) She’s always on her phone

It’s a known fact that when someone is cheating, they’ll do everything in their power to hide it. And one of the ways to do that is to stay glued to their phone.

Sound weird? Hardly.

Because if a girl’s always glued to her phone, she’s either messaging or talking to the person she’s cheated with.

That’s not something you want to be happening in your relationship.

If this sounds like your girl, it may be time to have a conversation about where her love and loyalty lie. Because if she can’t put her phone down for even a second, there’s a good chance she’s been unfaithful in the past.

It may sound like a cliché, but if something smells fishy, it probably is.

So what can you do about this?

Well, you could try to confiscate her phone and check the last person who sent her a text message . But your best bet is to have a serious conversation with her about your concerns.

In case she can’t give you a good reason for why she’s always on her phone, leave it alone. But know that if she’s cheating, this is one of the signs you’re likely to see.

Think about that for a minute, and if your gut is still telling you that your girl has been unfaithful in the past, don’t ignore it.

The best way to approach this is to talk to her about your concerns, and see if she’s willing to open up and be honest with you.

If your girlfriend is indeed cheating with a third party, hopefully, she’ll have the decency to end things before it gets too complicated.

But if she isn’t willing to change her ways, she’s not the kind of person you deserve.

That being said, it may be time for you to breakup and move on.

5) Her passwords have been changed

Passwords are important, especially when they’re linked to important accounts like email and social media. And while there are some couples who have shared Facebook and Instagram accounts, there are others who share security passwords.

If you and your significant other are one of those couples who share passwords, and you find out you’ve lost access to her social media accounts, there’s a good chance she’s trying to hide something.

But that’s not all. If you try to log into her email and the password has been changed, that’s another red flag.

A girl who cheated in the past will go out of her way to have complete control over her accounts and hide her tracks, And changing passwords is one way she can do that.

Something like that needs to be addressed immediately, and you need to get to the bottom of what’s going on.

Talk to her about it, but don’t sound accusatory. Be calm and ask her what’s going on. If she has nothing to hide, she may have no problem telling you what’s going on.

If she gets defensive or evasive, that’s a huge sign that something is up.

Trust your instincts, and if you think your girlfriend has cheated in the past, don’t hesitate to ask her about it.

If you don’t address the issue head-on, it could lead to bigger problems down the road. And the last thing you need is a cheating scandal in your relationship.

6) She loses interest in sex (or seems to)

Every romantic relationship can have its lulls in the bedroom. It’s the natural ebb and flow of things.

But if your girlfriend suddenly stops being interested in sex altogether, or she’s always initiating it but never seems to enjoy it, this could be something that needs your immediate attention.

She avoids eye contact during sex

Eye contact is a powerful way to connect with someone. This gesture shows that you’re both at the moment and enjoying what’s happening.

If your girlfriend avoids making eye contact with you during sex, it could be a sign that she’s not really there with you. She might be thinking of someone else instead.

Moreover, if she slept with someone else, avoiding eye contact while lovemaking could also be a sign that she’s feeling guilty about what she did.

People who cheat often feel as if they’re being watched, said licensed marriage and family therapist, Dr. Jane Greer on Woman’s Day. That’s why it’s common for them to avoid any eye contact.

Her sex drive is down the drain

Consider how your relationship was when it came to sex. Were you always a sexual couple? Would you say your sex life was pretty good?

Or has your sex life and sensual intimacy taken a bit of a downturn recently?

Loss of libido could mean a lot of different things, but when it comes to cheating women, this is often one of the telltale signs.

It could mean also mean that she’s not happy with the relationship and is looking for sexual satisfaction elsewhere.

If your partner has lost interest in sex since you’ve been together, it’s definitely worth asking them if anything has been going on behind your back.

The last thing you want to happen is to ignore this sign and then find out later that your girlfriend has been cheating on you the entire time.

7) Your girlfriend initiates sex more than ever

When women cheat, they often have an increase in sexual activity as they are trying to get their needs met, physically or emotionally. This usually means that they’re not getting what they need from their relationship, so they look for it elsewhere.

So if your girlfriend’s suddenly initiating sex more than ever, it could be a sign that she’s been unfaithful to you.

She gets experimental in bed

If your girlfriend takes the initiative to try new things in bed, it could be a sign that she’s been with someone else.

Why? Sleeping with someone else brings about a different experience. And if she felt the need to do something new with you in bed, it’s likely because her old routine wasn’t fulfilling enough.

She could eventually yearn for the same sexual experience (or even better) to prove to herself that the person she cheated with was just a fling.

She’s more communicative in bed

If your girlfriend cheated in the past, she’ll likely be more communicative in bed. She may want to talk about the experience or even ask you for feedback.

This can be a warning sign that she cheated because she’s likely trying to make things right with you. She may have felt guilty after the fact and is hoping that communicating in bed will ease some of that guilt.

Be on a lookout

Keep in mind that people cheat for different reasons, so not all of these signs will be relevant to your situation.

So keep an eye out for these kinds of behavior. You can also choose to confront her about it, or even find more creative ways to spice up your sex life.

No matter what you decide to do, make sure to handle the situation with care. You don’t want your girlfriend to get defensive and feel like she’s being interrogated.

8) She cancels plans and claims she’s too busy

It’s all but natural for couples to lose time for each other when their schedules at work or school pile up.

But if your girlfriend is suddenly canceling a lot of plans, or always making up excuses for why she can’t see you, then there’s a good chance she’s been busy with someone else.

If this happens frequently and her stories just don’t add up, it could be a sign that your girlfriend has cheated in the past. After all, if she was really interested in seeing you, she would find a way to make time.

What can you do? Talk to her about it.

Be direct but be understanding at the same time. It can be challenging to talk about this, but it’s necessary to get to the bottom of things.

If she truly didn’t cheat on you, she’ll be more than happy to clear the air and explain what’s been going on.

If she’s honest with you and tells you that she’s been canceling on you because she’s been seeing someone else, then at least you have your answer and can decide on what to do next for your relationship.

However, if she denies cheating and can’t give a satisfactory explanation for why she’s been canceling so many plans, then it may be time to rethink your relationship.

Don’t allow yourself to be strung along.

Trust what your gut is telling you. If your instincts still tell you that your girlfriend’s cheated in the past, then it’s probably time to end things.

9) Her clothes are suddenly sexier than usual

Changing of wardrobe is often an indirect way of trying to attract attention. If your girl has suddenly become a vixen and is dressing up for no reason, it could be a sign that she’s seeking validation from elsewhere.

But you may be thinking, couldn’t this change be for you, and she’s just trying to spice things up in the bedroom?

While this is a possibility, it’s important to look at all of the signs together to get a better idea if your girlfriend cheated in the past.

If she’s dressing sexier and her body language is more flirtatious than usual, but she’s never shown interest in being sexual with you before, it’s more likely that she’s trying to garner attention from other men.

Also, if you notice her wearing more revealing outfits as she goes out without you, that could be telling that she’s looking to attract the attention of other men.

You see, wearing sexier outfits could be her way of trying to make herself feel more attractive and confident after cheating on you.

She could feel like she’s now a desirable woman and is trying to capitalize on that. So by dressing up, she’s trying to convince herself that other men would want her.

If this sign applies to you, it’s time to have a serious conversation with your girlfriend and find out what’s going on.

As much as her sultry outfits can be a temptation, it’s important to remember that they could be indicative of something much worse.

10) She becomes less affectionate

A sudden change in her behavior towards you can also be an indication that your girlfriend cheated in the past. If she’s normally very loving and affectionate but starts becoming distant and cold, it could be a sign that something’s up.

Let me explain. When someone’s cheated on, they can often start to feel guilty and ashamed. Other times, they avoid physical contact and begin to distance themselves because they start to feel like they’re not good enough for their partner and don’t want to get caught.

Either way, if the girl you’re dating suddenly becomes less loving and affectionate towards you, it could be a good sign that she’s been unfaithful in the past.

If you’ve been together for a long time and have a strong foundation, you may want to talk to her about it. Express your concerns and see what she has to say. If she’s honest with you and takes ownership of her mistake, then there’s a good chance that the two of you can work through it.

But if she becomes defensive or denies that anything’s wrong, it’s probably time to take a step back and reconsider your relationship.

11) She accuses you of cheating

Projection is a common defense mechanism of a lot of people who have cheated. And people often become very paranoid and start accusing their partner of doing the same thing.

Think about this: women are, by nature, emotional beings. And when they cheat on their partner, it’s not uncommon for them to try to act as normal as possible. And more often than not, the guilt that comes along from the betrayal that they’ve done will eat away at them.

So if your girlfriend starts questioning where you’ve been and nitpicks on everything you do, it could be a sign that she’s been unfaithful in the past.

With no basis at all, she could start making accusations against you, especially of cheating, as her way to deflect from the situation so she could hide her guilty emotions.

She could easily turn things around and make you feel like the bad guy in all of this. So if your gut is telling you that something isn’t right, it’s probably because there is something going on that you’re not seeing.

If your girlfriend has a history of cheating, and you’re starting to see this sign, it’s best to confront her about it. Be prepared for her to be reactive.

Remember, it’s better to know the truth than to live in ignorance. You’d rather have a fighting chance with all the facts laid out than to be kept in the dark.

12) She’s made a few new acquaintances that you’re not aware of

Having new acquaintances is always a good thing. In fact, expanding your social circle of friends can only make the daily hustle and bustle of things better.

However, if your girlfriend has suddenly made a few new single friends and she’s not been completely upfront with you about who they are, there’s a good chance something fishy is going on behind your back.

Just think about it: if she was happy in your relationship and had no intention of cheating on you, she wouldn’t have any reason to hide her new friends from you. She’d go out of her way to set a date to hang out so you could get to know one another.

But that’s not all. She gets defensive when you ask about your separate social life, and might even accuse you of being possessive or paranoid.

If your girlfriend’s guilty of cheating in the past, she’ll do everything in her power to make it seem like there’s nothing going on. She might even try to convince you that you’re being too sensitive or that you’re blowing things out of proportion.

So take care when monitoring your girlfriend’s social life. If she’s anything like the majority of cheaters, she’ll be trying to cover her tracks.

13) You find condoms or birth control pills in her drawer

Not that you were snooping around, right? You were just looking for something and BAM! There they are, right in front of you.

You may be wondering why your girlfriend would need to stock condoms and birth control pills if she’s already with you, and that’s a valid question.

If you, as a couple, don’t use condoms and she’s on birth control, then what’s the point?

If you find any evidence of your girlfriend being sexually active with someone else, it’s definitely a cause for concern.

Finding items such as these in your girlfriend’s room or belongings is a pretty big sign that she has been unfaithful in the past. If you come across any of these items, it would be wise to have a serious conversation with her about where they came from and what was going on.

Go ahead and ask her about it. If she seems to come up with an explanation that sounds more like an alibi, then there’s a good chance she’s cheated on you.

However, if she’s honest with you and tells you that she’s been seeing someone else on the side, then you’ll have to decide if you can forgive her or not.

14) Your girlfriend has a different take on cheating

Many people have different viewpoints when it comes to infidelity. Some people see it as an automatic deal-breaker, while others may be more forgiving.

What if your girlfriend was completely against cheating, but has now changed her mind? What if she thinks that it’s not really a big deal and that you’re overreacting by being upset about the thought of someone having an affair?

This change of heart could be another sign that your partner has cheated in the past.

Why?

Because when a person has been cheated on in the past, they often have a different perspective on the matter. They may be more likely to understand why someone would cheat and may not see it as such a big deal.

If your girlfriend is suddenly okay with cheating after being completely against it before, ask her why she changed her mind.

But don’t be surprised if she can’t give you a straight answer. It might be because she’s still trying to cover up her tracks.

So watch out for this change in attitude, as it could be a sign that your girlfriend has cheated in the past without you knowing.

15) She starts to withdraw from the relationship altogether

Relationships can either bring you closer or bring you apart. And if your girlfriend’s starting to pull away from your relationship, it could mean she’s losing interest in you and may have found someone else to focus her attention on.

Has she been less communicative than she once was? Does she spend less time with you even if she has time on her hands? Has she been secretive about her whereabouts or activities?

Picture this: you’re both at home watching TV and you’re not saying a single word to each other. That’s how silent a relationship can be when one person is no longer interested.

So if you’ve answered yes to any of the questions, then there’s a good chance she may have cheated on you in the past.

Losing interest in a relationship can be a painful thing to watch, especially if you believe you two were meant to be together.

But if your girlfriend is no longer interested, it may be time to face the facts and move on.

Don’t be fooled

Cheating is a common issue that can ruin trust and cause long-term damage to a relationship. It’s a cause of heartache and can be difficult to forgive and forget.

If you’ve been wondering if your girlfriend cheated in the past, looking for any of these signs may help you come to a conclusion. If she has, it’s time to have a serious talk with her and decide what to do next.

When you have a feeling that she might have cheated in the past and she isn’t giving off the cues of loyalty, then pay attention.

Intuition never goes wrong in these cases, so if it tells you there’s something not right with this girl… listen to your gut and be honest with yourself.

If this is your first time to have a cheating girlfriend, it may be a tough pill to swallow, and it can be hard to move on from something like that.

The thing is, if she has cheated on you before, there’s a good chance she’ll do it again.

So think hard before making any rash decisions. You can choose to stay and work things out. Or you can choose to let go, move on, and find a new partner.

Remember, you deserve to be in a loving and healthy relationship with a woman who can be faithful to you, who will love and respect you.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.

Written by Frankie Pascua-dela Pasion

Frankie was born and raised in Manila, Philippines. She is a graduate of Humanities from the University of Asia and the Pacific.

Frankie is a seasoned Customer Success and Human Resources professional. She is also a certified Life Coach and Career Strategist. She helps people young and young at heart to simplify their lives by creating emotional awareness. She also loves working with people who have a genuine interest in breaking their inner limits through their journey of self-discovery and authenticity in their personal and professional lives.

Frankie’s recent venture into writing is fueled by her passion for human connection and meaningful relationships at home, at work, and basically everywhere. She enjoys the research, discovery, and reflection that go into each article as much as she writes about them, in the hopes that her words resonate with, and give perspective to her audience.

Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn: Frankie Pascua-dela Pasion
Email: [email protected]

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