Respect is something we want from the people around us.
But have you ever stopped to ask whether you respect yourself?
Are you confident in yourself and who you are?
Are you able to stand up for yourself when you need to?
A healthy level of self-respect gives you the confidence to set boundaries and protect yourself. It means you know your values and what you stand for.
Here are 14 key signs you respect yourself and won’t sh*t from anyone.
1) You speak highly of yourself
When you speak to others about who you are, you immediately draw upon your qualities and positive characteristics.
You have an acute understanding of the contribution you’re making to the lives of others and you have no hesitation in explaining what your contributions are.
This isn’t being arrogant. It’s simply having awareness of your positive and unique qualities.
If you’re able to speak positively about yourself, then it means you respect who you are and you aren’t afraid to defend yourself when you need to.
2) You put yourself first
You probably are a kind and helpful person, but when you respect yourself you understand the importance of putting yourself first.
You know that you need to take responsibility for your own life. You believe in looking after your own needs.
You understand that healthy relationships come when people can learn to love themselves first before they love someone else.
3) You accept your failures as lessons
Rather than beating yourself up for failing, you celebrate failures as opportunities to learn a new lesson in life.
You continually embrace being out of your comfort zone, knowing that the path less trodden is full of mistakes.
As Oscar Wilde once said, “experience is the name we give to our mistakes.”
4) You firm on your boundaries
Even if you have some edgy personality traits, you know yourself and what your boundaries are.
You’re willing to help others, but you won’t do something that jeopardizes your integrity.
If someone tries to overstep the mark and take advantage of you, you’ll recognize it immediately.
You have a strong sense of what’s right and what’s wrong, and you won’t bend to someone’s will if it crosses the line of your personal integrity.
You’re not in the business of running around trying to people-please all day. You know what your limits are.
Manipulators are always on the lookout for people-pleasers because they take advantage of their kindness.
But you don’t have to help others to earn praise from them. Seeking validation isn’t on your agenda.
Instead, you help others when it’s the right thing to do.
You stick to your values, and if other people don’t like it then that’s their problem.
5) You are honest with your emotions
Life is full of ups and downs. We experience continually experience a mix of emotions, from sadness one moment, to frustration in the next. We then go through bouts of joy and happiness, short-lived though they may be.
The constant cycle of emotions doesn’t faze you. In fact, you embrace all of your emotions without needing to judge them or change them.
You are honest with yourself about what you’re experiencing in that present moment.
6) You take time for self-care
It’s one thing to tell yourself that you love yourself. It’s quite another thing to show yourself that you love yourself through your actions.
You respect yourself so you make sure to carve out time for self-care.
Some people do this by introducing a breathwork daily routine into their lives (for example, this breathwork routine is excellent).
Others meditate every day (here’s a simple approach to meditating).
It matters far less which self-care routine you introduce into your life than making sure you do something as a routine.
When we make something a routine, it becomes far more effective.
7) You don’t need the approval of others
When you respect yourself, you stop needing the validation of others.
You know why you’re taking certain actions. You do what you think is best for you and the people you care about.
But when people disagree with the actions you’re taking, you have enough self-respect to continue doing what you’re doing anyway.
This isn’t about ignoring the advice of others. You’re happy to listen to people and change your behaviors when you genuinely agree with what they say.
But you only change your behaviors when the motivation for change comes from you. You never change because you need others to approve of what you’re doing.
Instead, you don’t try to prove yourself to others because you’re already comfortable with who you are.
Want to develop your personal power and give up on needing approval from others? Check out the free masterclass on personal power by the shaman Rudá Iandê.
8) You have a strong moral framework
Nobody can tell you what’s right and wrong. You know what you stand for and what your beliefs are.
A person who is out to manipulate will have a hard time convincing you to do something that doesn’t feel right.
You rely on your strong sense of right and wrong to work out if some have good intentions or not.
Because you trust your intuition, you recognize quickly when someone is stepping out of line.
9) You set boundaries in your relationships
Relationships can be tricky. Sometimes one partner tries to impose themselves on the other.
But not with you. You have self-respect.
When you respect yourself, it’s easy to set boundaries in your relationships. You know what’s important to you. You care for your partner. And you make life easier for both of you by being clear in your communication about what you need and how you’ll contribute to the partnership.
Setting boundaries comes naturally to you. You know it’s about loving yourself and respecting yourself.
10) You cut toxic people from your life
Just as you’re able to set boundaries in your relationships, you know when it’s time to cut someone from your life.
You don’t do this frivolously. You give people time to prove themselves to you.
But when someone is treating you with disrespect and acting in toxic ways, you have no hesitation in cutting them out.
You are a strong person and you make sure the people around you are treating you with respect.
11) You know your purpose and live by it
Some people struggle to figure out what their purpose in life is.
You respect yourself. You have a deeper understanding of your purpose.
What’s more is that your purpose isn’t about your selfish needs. You have instead defined your purpose around the contribution you can make to the lives of others.
Want to learn how to frame your purpose around the contribution you can make to the lives of others? Check out this free masterclass on personal power.
12) You’re not afraid to ruffle a few feathers
As we mentioned above, you’re not in the business of pleasing others. You don’t need external validation from others to feel better about yourself.
Rather than running around mad trying to please everyone, you’re not afraid to ruffle a few feathers if it means you’re staying true to who you are.
When someone is completely authentic and comfortable with who you are, it’s practically impossible to manipulate them.
They can’t prey on your need to seek validation from outside forces, because you’re already validated with who you are deep down.
This is not to say that you don’t treat people with respect, but you’re not going to sacrifice your own beliefs and values to get ahead.
You come as you are, and if other people don’t like it, well, then that’s their problem.
But this also means you’re quite picky about who you let you in to your inner circle.
You don’t easily trust others, because you know there are deceivers and manipulators behind the kindest of smiles.
13) You have built a huge wall to protect yourself
You’ve been through a lot in life, dealt with shady characters who have tried to bring you down, and you’ve decided that you don’t want to go through the same hardships again.
To some people, you can appear cold, ruthless, and darn right mean.
But this is how you must behave if you’re going to avoid the assholes who take advantage of you whenever they get the chance.
It’s part of your nature now.
This is why manipulators struggle to take advantage of you – they can’t get close to you in the first place!
14) You stand up for others who are less fortunate than you
Self-respect is about much more than looking after your own needs.
When you respect yourself deeply, you start to come to an appreciation that other people in life deserve your respect as well.
You stop needing other people to respect you because you already do this.
You start to give out respect to other people more freely and easily.
This makes you more attuned to the challenges other people are facing. You want to give others a helping hand.
You begin to stand up for others who are less fortunate than you.
When you do this from a place of self-respect, you shift from being a doormat of others to becoming a purpose-oriented human who simply wants to act in service of others.
The best bit is that you are looking after your own needs while also making valuable contributions to the lives of others.
Thanks for reading my article about respecting yourself. Want to get to know me? Check out my free video on the hidden trap of trying to improve yourself.
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