Paul Brian
Every introvert is different, and not every introvert fits with the typical image.
In fact, some introverts have a very extroverted side and other parts of themselves that don’t fit the “quiet, reserved” mold we associate with this personality type.
You may be quite sure you’re not an introvert, but if you find that a lot of the signs in this article resonate with you, there’s a high chance you are!
Let’s dive in…
1) You can’t stand small talk
Even if you’re fairly sociable, popular and speak your mind, one of the top signs you’re actually introverted is that small talk irks you.
You may believe you’re extroverted and seem to fit that profile.
But when you have to be around work colleagues talking about the weather or family members discussing common car issues with mid-90s Toyotas or something, you have to keep your eyeballs from rolling up into your head.
You’re not an introvert, you feel sure of it.
And yet being around small talk makes you itch to get away, which is a classic sign of low-key introversion.
2) You feel alone even around many people
Growing up, I was a very self-conscious kid, but I was also very sociable.
I loved to talk about sports with other people at school and find out what they were into and join in whatever activities were going on.
But as I got older, I found that some of my ideas were harder to communicate with others, and I started getting bullied as well.
I discovered that even in a group of people, I often felt alone.
I was experiencing a failure or sometimes, frankly, even a lack of desire to connect with those around me.
I just didn’t share their interests or really feel like I was seen for who I am and what I care about.
Maybe that’s how they felt about me, too? Who knows.
All I know is it’s part of what made me realize that I’m an extroverted introvert.
3) You’re social, but not really that outgoing
This is another big clue that you’re actually introverted without realizing it:
You like to go out and talk to people, but you aren’t very into meeting new people or going into unknown social situations.
A night with a couple of friends or going to a book club with some folks you know sounds ideal.
But showing up at a new club and socializing a bit with new people is just not at all appealing to you.
You’d rather stick with friends you already know.
“You like to attend social events, but mostly when they’re filled with people you already know.
You go to parties to be with friends, not necessarily make friends.”
4) You’re cautious to warm up to strangers
When you do meet strangers, a telltale clue that you’re more of an introvert is that you take time to warm up to them.
You’re not the type to share personal details too soon or open up right away.
You take your time in getting to know somebody, and your old friends tend to stay closest to you rather than new acquaintances.
You may be a friendly, personable individual, but looking at it objectively, you’ll notice that you generally prefer to take your time when it comes to getting to know somebody new and letting them into your inner circle.
5) You need more time than average to recharge from social events
Introverts need time to recharge.
Even if you’re quite sociable and love being around people, you may notice that you feel very wiped out after a lot of noise and fun.
Your energy levels just seem to be very drained after you’ve talked a lot with others, and even when you enjoy people’s company, there’s nothing quite like curling up in your own bed.
You may turn on a movie to stream or play a game on your computer to recharge, or you may meditate or listen to music.
Whatever your preferred method…
6) You have a rich imagination and active inner monologue
Another big indicator that you’re an introvert is that you have a really active inner monologue and imagination.
You sometimes find yourself enthralled with your own company, because your thoughts are like following an interesting and exciting story.
You are your own form of entertainment and inspiration in many cases!
Spending a lot of time working and interacting with others sometimes makes you yearn for a bit more time alone to breathe freely and think your own thoughts…
“When you’re with other people, it might feel like your brain is too overloaded to really work the way it should,” explains Jenn Granneman.
“In solitude, you’re free to tune into your own inner monologue.”
7) You shun the spotlight
When you’re a true extrovert, the spotlight and public recognition is like catnip.
No matter how modest you are, you like to get up there and feel the bright lights on your shoulders.
Introverts are the opposite and prefer to work from behind-the-scenes, helping others and not caring about taking the credit.
If you find that you’re more in the latter category, there’s a very good chance you’re on the more introverted side of the spectrum.
8) You prefer texting to calling
If you have a choice between texting or calling, which do you prefer?
To be fair, many people in the younger generations are born texters:
They wouldn’t call if lightning struck!
Nonetheless, that impulse you have to text instead of calling is a very introverted impulse.
Younger generations are generally becoming more introverted in fact, along with a tendency to consume more content online and text much more.
9) You have above-average focus
Are you able to focus on a work task for hours at a time without losing steam?
This ability to hone in and really focus is a very introverted trait.
The extrovert may make a call, check messages, scroll through the stock market and then call their other friend to ask what he’s doing.
You, on the other hand, want to sit down and get right to it. This is often the sign of a more introverted, mission-oriented person who’s more about personal drive and internal motivation than external motivation.
10) You’re extremely perceptive
As somebody who may be introverted without realizing it, take a look at your level of attention to detail:
You may notice small things that many others miss.
This also often goes hand-in-hand with a very sharp memory.
This highly perceptive ability is an introverted trait:
You process what’s going on around you and the people in your orbit at a very granular level, whereas more extroverted folks tend to just live “in the moment.”
11) You have a small circle of friends
Quality over quantity is the way you prefer when it comes to your friendships.
You likely have a smaller circle of friends and do not have such a wide circle of casual acquaintances.
This ties back to what I mentioned earlier about preferring to socialize with those you already know than meet new people.
If this sounds like you, then it’s a definite marker that you’re more on the introverted side even if you didn’t realize it.
12) You’re a great listener
Extroverts generally tend to be the one talking, sharing and putting forth on any number of subjects!
They’re the life of the party, or at least somewhere near to that.
If you’re more of a listener (and a very good one at that) it’s a sign that you’re more so on the introverted side.
