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19 clear-cut signs you’re attractive to other people

Are you an attractive woman? Or are you not sure?

Let’s answer that question in today’s guide, where we look at 19 signs you’re attractive.

First of all: if you’re a bit embarrassed at reading this article, don’t be.

Everyone asks the question at some point in their lives: “Am I attractive to the opposite sex?”

It’s a deeply human need to be accepted by society and especially in terms of dating and relationships.

That being said, the simple truth is that there are many different types of beauty out there. And when it comes to love, you’ll want to focus on the two major types: Physical and Spiritual.

Yes, the goal is to be both physically AND spiritually beautiful.

As I mentioned, there are 19 signs in all. You don’t need to have every single one of the signs, but the more you have, the better.

And the best part? With the tips you’ll learn in this guide, you can even GROW in both physical and spiritual beauty as time goes by.

So how many of the following 19 signs do you have? Let’s take a look and see.

How to tell if you are physically beautiful

Physical beauty is quite important in the dating game, as it’s what makes your “first impression” on other people. And while first impressions don’t necessarily last, they do influence other people’s opinions of you.

Put simply, the more attractive you make yourself, the more you’ll get out of life. It may sound harsh, but it’s the truth.

To know for sure if you’re attractive, look out for the following signs.

#1: People are drawn to you

Again, different people have different opinions about what makes a person attractive but good looks are a common denominator. And if people are drawn to you — as in, they feel the urge to know you better — then that’s a sign you’re attractive.

Watch out for these little signs:

  • When you’re just walking by, people stop you to ask a question
  • At parties, boys periodically try to start conversations with you
  • At gatherings, people try to get to know more about you

Here’s a tip: If a guy is drawn to you — and you’re drawn to him at the same time — then it’s a good sign of chemistry. Get to know him better — he might be good for you.

#2: People contact you out of the blue

Have you ever heard of “Breadcrumbing?”

Think of tossing breadcrumbs to animals to make them come closer to you. Sadly, it’s a tactic that’s also being used in the dating game.

Here’s how people “breadcrumb” in the dating arena:

  • They contact people they’re interested in out of the blue
  • They send anonymous “love letters” as they did in middle school
  • They stalk you on social media, hoping you’ll notice them

What does it mean when men “breadcrumb” you?

At worst, they want a sexual encounter with you. At best, they want to be your friend — or even your boyfriend.

In any case, proceed carefully — you don’t want to do anything you’ll regret later, right?

#3: Men act awkward around you

When boys act weird around you, it could possibly mean they find you very attractive. And if it’s an especially common reaction you get, then there’s no doubt — you’re a hottie and you drive the boys crazy.

Why do guys act awkwardly around pretty women? It’s all Mother Nature’s idea.

Men naturally want to be liked by attractive women — it makes them feel good and gives them validation. And so when they see you, a pretty girl, near them, they feel the sudden need to be on their best behavior and for most guys, that results in awkward behavior.

Now, you might be thinking: “Could it also be that they’re uncomfortable around women in general?”

While socially awkward, low-confidence guys act like that by default, pay attention if LOTS of guys do that around you. It could mean that even the more confident boys out there get rattled when you walk into the room.

And that says a lot about how attractive you are.

#4: People are shocked when you can’t take compliments

Hey, I get it. Some compliments can make you think: “Where the heck did THAT come from?”

Let’s say someone gives you a compliment but you disagree with it. And so you say: “Thanks, but don’t say that — it’ll get in my head” (or something similar).

If they’re surprised at how you disagreed with the compliment, then it means the compliment was sincere and so you’d better believe it.

The good news? It’s a sign you’re not just physically beautiful but spiritually too. And as you’ll see in the second part of this guide, spiritual attractiveness is just as important, if not more so.

#5: Men pout when they see you

When men pout when they see you or when their jaw drops even slightly, or when they make an “ooh” sound — it’s a clear sign.

They’re attracted to you and there’s no doubting it. Body language doesn’t lie.

You might have noticed it before. You walk into a room, and you notice a guy glance at you. Then they quickly look away, pretending not to see you — but their lips are pursed.

That’s the dead giveaway that they find you pretty.

#6: People like your smile

“I like your smile.”

“I love the way you smile.”

“Your smile is contagious, did you know that?”

What do compliments like these mean?

When a guy gives you a compliment like this, it could mean one of two things:

So when it happens, just say “thanks.” No need to stay up all night wondering whether he meant anything by it. Instead, observe his behavior to spot any of the other signs in this guide.

#7: Men are hot and cold toward you

Does it seem like men are either very warm or very cold toward you — but never lukewarm or indifferent?

If so, then it could be a sign you’re more attractive than the average girl. When men treat a woman with extreme warmth, they’re likely kissing up to you and hoping to build a relationship.

On the other hand, when they treat you with extreme coldness, they may be “negging” you.

What’s “negging?” It’s a common flirting trick men use on women. They might tease you or throw mild insults your way, getting you riled up. And when you’re in a playful mood, you’re more open to flirting back without even knowing it.

My advice? Unless you fancy him, too, stay on your guard and don’t fall for the trick.

#8: You don’t get too many compliments from men

If women complement your looks but men don’t, it might also be a sign you’re attractive. Most men avoid complimenting a woman’s appearance because it’s obvious.

Here’s why:

Most men know that it’s better to keep their feelings hidden — at least for now — than to openly declare them to you.

After all, think about it. Imagine two thoroughly average guys were dating you.

One of them openly declared his feelings for you, while the other is more aloof and mysterious. Which one of them would you find more attractive than the other?

Most women would pick the mysterious one. For some strange reason, the honest one comes off as needy, desperate, and maybe even icky.

So if you don’t get too many compliments from a guy you like, it could be because he’s waiting for the right time.

Is he a shy guy? Maybe.

If you like him too, it may be a good idea to ask him out and see how he reacts.

#9: You’ve had a fairly active dating life

If you regularly go on dates with men or if you’ve had relationships before, then you can be pretty sure men are attracted to you.

Sad to say, some women out there have great personalities but can go years without a single date.

That’s the power of physical attractiveness. It can make you happy or miserable depending on how you use it.

On the other hand, if the relationships you’ve been in have mostly been abusive, that’s another story. You may be physically attractive, but your spiritual side may need some work. Not to worry — we’ll cover that soon.

#10: People stare at you

Do complete strangers stare at you? It could mean many things:

  • They think you’re attractive — after all, you turned heads
  • They want your attention but don’t know how to get it
  • Something about you looked out of the ordinary, and it caught their attention

Again, don’t rely on this sign (or any other) on its own. Check if you see the other signs as well. The more signs you spot, the surer you can bet that you’re pretty.

So there you have it. The first 10 signs are signs you’re physically beautiful.

Now let’s look at the other side of the coin — spiritual beauty.

How to tell if you are spiritually beautiful

“Spiritual beauty” covers your personality, worldview, and how well you accept yourself.

And yes, other people notice it too. Your spiritual beauty — or lack thereof — will dictate just how happy and successful your “love life” will be.

As mentioned earlier, spiritual beauty is just as important as physical beauty, if not more so. While your looks will make the first impression on others, your spirit is what makes the LASTING impression.

And here’s the thing:

While other people tend to appreciate your physical beauty before you do, it’s the opposite with spiritual beauty. Here, you can see your spiritual beauty before others.

Here are the 9 signs to look for

#11: You’re happy with yourself

Are you happy with yourself? Let’s do a quick test…

  • Do you take yourself lightly?
  • Do you avoid comparing yourself to others?
  • Do you avoid ruminating, or obsessing about the past?
  • Do you focus on making progress in all areas of your life?
  • Is “giving back” important to you?

The more “yes” answers you have, the happier you are with yourself and the more spiritually beautiful you are. In a world run by social media, it’s rare to find people like you.

And if you had more “no” answers, don’t worry.

Learn to stop comparing yourself to others or thinking about the past. And start focusing on growth and giving back. It’ll change your life like nothing else.

#12: You accept your flaws

This one’s related to Sign #11. Nobody’s perfect. You have your own unique flaws and weaknesses.

The question is:

Do you accept them? Can you forgive yourself easily? Can you laugh at your mistakes and misfortunes?

One of the most important lessons you can learn in life is to stay away from perfection. It’s great to set high standards for yourself, but perfection is an IMPOSSIBLE standard.

And you wouldn’t set that for your worst enemy — why would you set it for yourself?

Instead of striving for perfection, strive for excellence. No one can ever be perfect but anyone can be really, really good at anything. And that includes you.

Here’s a tip: When it comes to romance, it’s super-important to find someone who accepts your flaws, too. But it all starts with you. If you’re not willing to do it, no one else will, after all.

#13: You’re good at expressing yourself

Do you easily express your ideas, thoughts, and feelings?

Are you good at articulating solutions and explanations?

Are you not afraid of speaking your mind?

The more you answered “yes” to those questions, the more at peace you are with yourself. You’re free of the need to impress others or embellish your work.

And yes, that’s spiritually beautiful. In a culture fueled by social media, most people feel a never-ending urge to be noticed, be liked, and be significant in some way.

It takes a lot of maturity to see that urge as unimportant and even unnecessary. If you’re mature enough to know it’s more important to be helpful than go viral, that’s a beautiful thing.

#14: You don’t want attention

Ever noticed that at times when you DON’T want attention, you get lots of it?

For instance, when you want to spend some alone time, friends call you to meet up or your boss asks you to work on a side project.

Or when you stay quiet in a meeting, you get asked for your opinion.

What does it mean when that happens to you a lot?

It simply means people see you as trustworthy and “steady.” They know they get value whenever they ask you for it and so they get as much of it as they can.

Contrast this with attention-seekers, who tend to overpromise, underdeliver, and shirk responsibility. You’re not that, and that’s why people trust you.

#15: You’re independent

Can you rely on yourself to get the job done? Are you naturally good at problem-solving, prioritization, and execution?

That’s a beautiful thing and bosses would love having you on their teams.

When it comes to dating, believe it or not, but independence is a trait men like in a woman.

Now, you might think: “Nah, I’ve met guys who got intimidated by me”. Sure, some men are insecure and weak. But trust me when I say the strong, confident, REAL men out there would love to meet you.

#16: You have a purpose in life and you’re optimistic about it

Do you have a mission in life? Do you have a purpose that’s bigger than yourself and gives your life meaning and direction?

Or are you currently wandering through life, wondering what your “purpose” is?

So many women never find their purpose in life, and as a result, die unhappy.

I beg you to NOT be one of them. Find a purpose, whether it’s in the corporate world, the household, or anywhere in between, or anywhere else entirely.

Having a purpose and loving it makes you so much more beautiful. It inspires other people to follow your example and make the world a better place.

#17: You’re being yourself

Do you love yourself? By that, I don’t mean doing whatever you want, whenever you want. That’s not love — that’s greed.

Instead, I’m talking about loving yourself enough to do what’s GOOD for you and for other people. Loving yourself means not being selfish but being a force of good for the world.

#18: You have an open mind

Having an “open mind” means being open to ideas and information outside of your own set of beliefs. It makes you beautiful and approachable.

Now, you might have your own set beliefs or worldview by now. And that’s fine.

Having an open mind means you can listen to other beliefs and consider them for what they are. And when you see the sense in them, it enriches your own worldview.

If you don’t, you discard them — but at least you gave the other person the blessing of being listened to.

#19: You’re passionate about life

Lastly, a great sign of spiritual beauty is when you’re passionate about life.

You’re not all “doom-and-gloom” like lots of people today and you’re not constantly worrying about the future. Instead, you’re working tirelessly to make your dreams come true.

Being “passionate” means understanding there are lots of things in the world you can’t control. And yet you clearly see the things you CAN control and you focus all your energy and resources there.

You work with gusto. You’re unstoppable. You rise after every failure or setback.

That’s what being passionate about life means. And I sincerely hope after reading this guide, that’s precisely what you’ll strive to be from now on.

So are you attractive?

So you see, there are lots of signs to look out for when trying to see just how attractive you are. What’s more, there’s more than just physical beauty here — there’s also spiritual beauty.

How many of the signs applied to you? Are you physically beautiful? How about spiritually?

No matter what “score” you got, don’t worry about it. We all start somewhere, right? That’s the goal of this guide — to show you two things:

  1. Where you are in terms of your physical and spiritual attractiveness
  2. Where you need to go from here

So here’s some advice.

Check the signs that DIDN’T apply to you. Write them down. These are the “gaps” you’ll want to fill as you move forward.

Then pick one of those signs as your next “life project.”

I suggest you pick the one you can start working on right away. It should also be the one you feel you can achieve with the least amount of time and effort.

For example, let’s say you checked the list and you thought: “I’m not that independent.” (That’s sign #15). You then ask yourself: “What can I do to become more independent now… and have fun at the same time?”

Do a quick brainstorming session, write down all the ideas that come to mind, and pick the easiest one to do. Then get to work. It’s that simple.

Ask the right questions, and you’ll get the right answers.

Make the lifestyle changes you need and apply them consistently until they become part of the “new you.” So go ahead — get started.

Life is short, after all, so make the most of it and be happy at the same time.

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Lachlan Brown

Written by Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook.

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