Our thoughts are invisible, but they leave traces.
Even the most reserved guy will show some subtle signs when he thinks about you a lot.
Here’s how to spot his hidden tells and know that he’s into you.
If he’s showing these signs then you can be sure you’re on his mind and likely in his heart as well.
1) He asks about your wellbeing frequently
If you’re looking for signs he thinks about you a lot, start with this sign right here.
He checks up on you and asks if you’re doing OK quite often.
This is a sign he’s thinking about you and cares about you, otherwise he wouldn’t be asking.
If you’re into this guy you likely find this sweet and attractive. If not, it can come across as overbearing and creepy.
2) He remembers what you say
Another of the top signs he thinks about you a lot is that he remembers what you say.
Unlike many guys where it goes in one ear and out the other, this man is a serious listener…at least when it comes to you.
He remembers what you tell him, including small details, jokes and oddities.
Nothing too small escapes his attention, and when he doesn’t hear what you said or understand he asks for clarification.
3) Ask an expert
The idea of asking an expert about dating may strike you as overkill.
I’d always assumed that basic issues of finding the right person and trying out dating them was simple or at least easy to understand.
It’s not! Not at all.
And the best resource I’ve found for getting insights into dating and what to do when somebody likes you is a place called Relationship Hero.
This site full of professionally-accredited relationship coaches really knows what they’re doing and it takes only minutes to connect up with someone.
I used them last year when I myself was very into a girl and wondered when to make my move.
They helped me immensely in making that work! These guys are legit relationship superheroes in my opinion.
4) He buys you thoughtful gifts
Not all gifts are created equal.
Some are given without thought, on the fly and with little real affection involved.
Others are chosen carefully and lovingly by someone who actually knows you and cares about what you like.
If he’s hitting home runs in category two, then you can be sure you’re on his mind quite often and in depth.
5) He shares links to content he thinks you’d resonate with
Another of the important signs he thinks about you a lot is that he shares things with you he thinks you’d like.
This may include book and film recommendations, links to articles, jokes and memes or even links to clubs, locations and vacation ideas he thinks you’d be into.
When he really tailors his suggestions to you specifically, it means you’ve been on his mind!
6) He takes an intense interest in your beliefs and values
One of the deepest signs he thinks about you a lot is that he cares a lot about what you believe and why.
He wants to know what drives you, what formed you and your challenges and triumphs.
He’s fascinated by your religious and spiritual beliefs, or lack of them, and he often asks you about them.
7) He creates excuses to meet you more often
What do most of us do when we think of someone a lot?
The answer is that we get an increasing desire to meet them in person.
For that reason, one of the top signs he thinks about you a lot is that he creates excuses to meet you more often.
Whether it’s a work project or happening to have your kids in the same soccer league, he’s there with bells on.
What a coincidence…
8) He often bumps into you ‘by chance’
On a related note of the common signs he thinks about you a lot, is that he’s often bumping into you.
Your favorite hangout, the park you jog in, that volleyball league you joined last month.
Suddenly he’s showing up there.
Wait, isn’t this called stalking?
9) His friends tell on him
Many guys speak to a friend or two when they’re into a girl or thinking of her a lot.
Not everyone can keep their mouths shut, especially if they’re a mutual friend of yours.
In this case, they may just let you know directly that their pal is down bad for you.
Consider his code cracked.
10) He’s making it obvious that he’s still single
You know when somebody is dropping lots of hints about being single but trying to do so in a non-needy way?
It’s usually because they are on the hunt and / or because they want to signal to a certain special someone to make their move.
“I’m single and ready to mingle, take your shot guy,” is the general idea here.
If he’s broadcasting his bachelorhood it’s one of the key signs he thinks about you a lot.
11) He picks conversations back up the next day or week
Usually when you have a conversation with someone and it drops off, you forget about it or don’t bring it up again.
But one of the signs you’ve been on his mind is that he picks conversations back up at a later date…sometimes even week.
He wants to pursue something you were talking about, or has a further point to make about it, which means he’s been thinking about you, or at least about what you were discussing with him.
12) He invites you to events he thinks you’d love
Another of the crucial signs he thinks about you a lot is that he invites you to events he thinks you’d like based on your specific interests and passions.
For example, if you’re into candle dipping he may invite you to a medieval art fair…
Or if you love biking he may invite you to a meetup event biking through the country this weekend.
Whatever the case may be, he makes it clear that he’s been thinking specifically about you and what you love to do.
13) He helps you without a second thought
When a guy has been thinking of you a lot, being asked to help you doesn’t come as a burden to him.
He jumps to it without a second thought and does whatever it takes to be there for you.
Although he will try to avoid becoming “just a friend” and being your shoulder to cry on, he’ll at least be a strong, silent presence for you to trust and ask for help when you need it.
If this is the case you have definitely been on his mind (and more than just a little bit).
14) He cancels plans to be there for you
On a related note, a guy who thinks about you often will usually be willing to cancel most of his plans to be there for you in a pinch.
If you have a crisis or emergency, he’ll be there for you and you’ll have no doubts that you’re a priority for him.
Whether or not you’re dating or romantically involved, he’ll make it crystal clear that you’re on his mind and you matter a lot for him.
15) He does more for you than for others
Another of the classic signs he thinks about you a lot is that he does more for you than he does for other people.
This is a very good thing, of course.
The only downside is if you find he treats you like a queen but other people like shit.
This leads to the common mistake of not realizing that the way he snaps at wait staff and other people is how he’ll also talk to you one day, so be careful.
16) He gets down when you’re down
When somebody we care about and think about a lot gets down, it tends to affect us too.
We get down in the dumps along with them.
That’s how it is when a man thinks about you a lot. He hates to hear that you’re struggling, and it also affects his mood for real.
17) He answers your messages almost immediately
What’s this guy’s wait time like on messages?
One of the top signs he thinks about you a lot is that he replies to messages extremely rapidly.
It’s almost like he’s writing a response before you’re even done typing a followup message or finishing your previous thought.
Honestly, because he probably is.
18) He cares deeply about your opinion of him
Another thing that shows you’re on his mind a lot is that he cares deeply about your opinion of him.
He wants you to know he’s a good guy, an honest guy, a reliable guy.
He presents himself in a consistently masculine light and shows off his best aspects, while at the same time not shying away from admitting his mistakes.
This bravery in showing his whole self to him shows that he’s been thinking of you a lot and respects you enough not to hide his whole self from you, including the uglier parts.
19) He undergoes dramatic style changes
Another of the interesting signs he thinks about you a lot is that his style undergoes dramatic changes.
One week he’s a bleach blond surf dude, and the next he looks like he’s out of a Brooks Brothers catalog from the 1950s.
He’s a rebel skate kid one month and the next he’s a mature businessman in penny loafers (not that skater rebels can’t wear penny loafers).
The point is, this guy is going through some kind of style revolution, and it seems that you always get to be an audience of one.
20) He’s spruced up to the max around you
On a related note, pay attention to how he seems to get spruced up more around you than around other people.
This means he’s into you and thinks of you a lot.
“I wonder what she’ll think of this really cool leather jacket” is probably the last thing he thought before meeting you tonight for drinks.
I hope you appreciate the thought he’s putting into this!
21) His schedule changes to align more with yours
Next up in the romantic-or-creepy depending how you feel category is that he may adjust his schedule to align with yours.
This is especially common if you’re workmates.
If nothing else, you can’t say this guy is a slacker!
22) He’s very active on your social media channels
Social media is a place that many people spend lots of time these days.
That’s why it’s helpful to take a look at his online comportment.
If he’s interacting and cruising around your social media channels a lot it’s a classic sign he thinks about you a lot.
If he’s your number one fan online, you can be sure he’s very much into you.
23) He frequently asks you to meet up
Does he ask you to meet up a lot?
It figures that this means he’s thinking of you often if he’s doing this.
The only caveat here is that there are players and lonely guys who will scroll their contact list and simply message any girl they know to meet up.
In that case he wouldn’t be thinking of you so much as likely thinking about what’s between your legs.
Nonetheless, if he’s suggesting tasteful and specific dates and meet ups on a frequent basis you’re definitely on his mind in a special way.
Don’t mind me…
If a guy is thinking about you a lot then he’s likely falling in love or already taken the plunge.
Do you potentially feel the same way?
Remember to take it slow and see what develops naturally.
Strong attraction between two people is a wonderful thing, but the idealization and romance we build up in our minds often clashes with the daily reality.
Remember to check out the coaches at Relationship Hero as well, because they really know how to get a read on these kinds of situations and how to maximize your success and happiness in them.
Try dating and see what happens. You may find it’s a nightmarish let-down, or that it’s even better than you expected!
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.