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39 subtle signs he misses you when you’re not around

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Maybe you’ve had an argument, broken up, or perhaps things are going well and you’re just looking for reassurance that whenever you’re not around he is thinking of you.

He doesn’t always have to go out of his way to let you know he cares. Sometimes, the simplest gestures can speak volumes.

No matter what your situation, in this article, I’ll share 39 subtle signs he misses you when you’re not around.

How do you know if a guy truly misses you?

1) He texts you all the time

Men can be pretty straightforward when it comes to showing their feelings.

Who forgets to text someone they are truly interested in, care about, and miss? Nobody, that’s who.

That’s why the amount of times he is dropping into your inbox is going to be a good indication of how much you’re on his mind.

If he misses you, he won’t disappear for the best part of a week. He’ll constantly be reaching out on text, even when he doesn’t have that much to say.

2) He’s all over your social media

He watches all of your social media stories, pretty much as soon as you create them.

He leaves comments on your photos and posts. And all your social media profiles constantly get a flurry of hearts, likes, and emojis.

This isn’t something he does because he wants to keep tabs on you. This is him letting you know he cares enough about you to want to see everything you post online.

It’s almost like he has a google alert set for your every online movement.

3) He makes plans in advance

The more a guy likes you and misses you, the more organized he is in locking down plans to see you.

There’s a world of difference between the man who asks on Monday if you’re free Friday evening and the dude who slides into your DM at 8 pm asking if you’re free tonight.

As old-fashioned as it might sound, it really reflects his intentions towards you.

You’re not an afterthought, you are a priority. The more he wants to spend time with you, the more he will plan ahead.

4) He calls you

For a lot of us these days, calls can still feel like a bigger deal. They’re reserved for the people who hold a special place in our lives (and hearts).

As a meme, I recently read puts it:

“Unless you’re my best friend or the love of my life, I don’t want to chat on the phone”.

If he’s calling you just to catch up, then he clearly misses you.

5) He replies straight away

Not all guys are the same. Some are always going to text or call more than others. Every man shows his interest in different ways.

Him not blowing up your phone non-stop certainly doesn’t mean he isn’t missing you. He might just not be that type of guy.

But how responsive a guy is to your contact and messages is more universal. Every man who likes you will be fairly prompt with their replies.

They won’t keep you hanging. You’ll always hear back from them asap. And if it does take a while, he’ll probably offer you an explanation over the delay.

6) He sends you pointless messages

Does he get in contact without necessarily having anything to say or any real point to it? Clearly, it’s because you are in the forefront of his mind.

He might send you funny memes that he’s seen, interesting articles that he’s read, or anything he feels like sharing with you.

Maybe he texts you random things that have happened during his day.

It’s less important the content, and more significant that you’re the one he wants to share it with.

7) He says things like “saw this and thought of you”

If he reaches out and says things like “this reminded me of you” it’s obvious that he misses you. Things around him bring you to mind.

If he sees something cool, he thinks of you. If he reads something good, he shares it with you.

This is a subtle sign of true affection.

8) He wants to FaceTime

If he has to see your face, it’s because he is missing it.

FaceTime is an easy way to feel closer that’s more intimate than just text or phone calls.

If he wants to see you, but he can’t be with you for some reason, he’ll do what it takes to make sure he can at least lock eyes with you.

Arranging a FaceTime date is the perfect solution.

9) He’s protective

Feeling protective can show up in different ways.

He checks in on you to make sure you’re ok. He cares about your safety, so tells you to text him when you get home safe.

When a guy really cares about a woman, he can’t help but feel protective over her.

You see, for guys, it’s all about their inner hero.

I learned about this from the hero instinct. Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept is about what really drives men in relationships, which is ingrained in their DNA.

And it’s something most women don’t know anything about.

Once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit stronger when they find someone who knows how to trigger it.

The easiest thing to do is to check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here. He shares some easy tips to get you started, such as sending him a 12-word text that will trigger his hero instinct right away.

Because that’s the beauty of the hero instinct.

It’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you and only you.

Click here to watch the free video.

10) He makes gestures

Gestures don’t need to be grand to have a strong impact. The little thoughtful things he does for you will show you if he misses you.

I was recently away for a week traveling and my man let himself into my apartment, prepared food for me, and left it for when my flight got in.

He even send me an adorable text to say “I hope you don’t find it creepy, but I left dinner for you”.

He knew that cooking would be the last thing I wanted to do. This thoughtfulness showed me just how much he missed me whilst I was away.

11) He is always available for you

If you suggest doing something, he doesn’t need to check if he’s free. He wants to see you.

Hanging out with you is his favorite thing and he misses you when you’re not around so whenever it’s possible, he wants to be with you.

He’ll maybe even cancel plans or rearrange things just to see you.

12) He sends snaps of what he’s doing

Let’s face it, even when those pics he sends are pretty dull, it means the world.

Because that humble picture of his lunch, of him stuck in traffic, or him out on a run says far more.

A picture is worth a 1000 words, and in this case those words are:

“I miss you and I think about you all the time”.

13) He messages or calls on nights out

He’s meant to be off having fun doing something else.

He’s out with his friends but rather than “boys being boys” and getting up to all kinds of antics — he can’t stop thinking about you.

If he is still thinking about you during the fun times in his life (and not just when he’s bored or has nothing else to do) then he sincerely misses you.

14) He asks for pics of you

He wants to see what you’re up to, and if he can’t, he wants you to send snaps to show him.

He wants to see the clothes you try on when you’re out shopping. He wants to see your new haircut when you’re at the salon. He probably wants to see other slightly more x-rated content if you’re prepared to send it too.

But generally, he just wants to share in your day-to-day life.

15) He tries to keep conversations going

Your text exchanges aren’t brief.

When you text him, he asks questions and sends long replies to keep the conversation going.

He makes an effort to show that he wants to be talking to you, even if neither of you have a lot to really say.

It’s just about showing you that he misses you when you aren’t there.

16) He tags you in posts on social media

If he or his friends post pictures on social media, he’s sure to tag you.

He may even post historic pictures of you too together, with a soppy caption like “missing you today.”

If he sees a cool, funny, insightful, or interesting post he’ll be sure to tag you in the comments.

It shows you that even when you’re not together, you’re still on his mind.

17) You’re the first person he tells news too

If there is some big event happening in his life, he will tell you.

Whether it’s good news or bad news, he wants to make sure you know.

And more often than not, he lets you know before anyone else does.

18) You feel it

Feeling him missing you isn’t about some sort of psychic bond that you too have (although maybe it could be).

It’s more subtle and simple than that.

You feel like he misses you because he never leaves you in any doubt. You don’t have to question his feelings for you, he shows you.

He doesn’t blow hot or cold. His efforts and contact are consistent.

How do you know if he misses you during no contact?

So what about during no contact. How on earth can you tell if he misses you when you are purposely trying to not speak to him or see him?

Admittedly, in this situation after a breakup where you are trying to avoid him, it is harder to tell.

Luckily there are still some subtle, yet powerful signs he misses you.

1) People tell you he’s been down and withdrawn

If you are properly following the no contact rule, without cheating, then you won’t see how he is doing.

Neither should you be asking people about him. But other people who know him might tell you that your ex has been a mess since the breakup.

Maybe they say he seems really down, or that they haven’t seen or heard from him because he suddenly became really withdrawn.

It’s a clear indication he is struggling and missing you.

2) He’s still watching your social media stories

You’re not having any contact with him, so you’re not checking out his social media. But he can’t say the same.

Even if he isn’t being obvious about it by liking posts or photos, you may still notice he’s been checking your stories every day.

He wants to know what you’re up to, probably because he isn’t ready to let you go and misses you.

3) He reaches out to you

If he didn’t want to have no contact after your breakup then he may be the one to reach out.

He might send you a text just to “check-in” and see how you are doing. You may get a missed call from him, potentially from the middle of the night.

If he tries to speak to you, he is clearly missing you.

4) He says sorry

Showing remorse is a sign that he has been reflecting on the breakup and his role in it.

If he gets in touch to let you know he is sorry, and offers an apology — it’s obvious that you have been playing heavily on his mind.

In hindsight, he has had a chance to think things through. His remorse probably comes from the fact he is missing you.

Signs he misses you after a fight

You had a big blow out and you haven’t spoken since.

You’ve been going crazy and you want to know what is going on in his head.

Does this spell the end, or does he regret your argument and is sat home missing you right now?

Here are some signs he misses you after you’ve argued:

1) He offers an olive branch

Ok, so it’s not necessarily a text where he pours his heart out, says sorry, or professes his undying love for you.

But he makes some kind of token gesture to start the ball rolling to reconciliation. Perhaps it’s a text to test the water.

Something as simple and subtle as “hey” or “how are you?”.

Maybe he watches your social media stories or likes a post.

It’s his way of saying he misses you and he is ready to make up.

2) He goes quiet on social media

They say that silence speaks volumes. If he not only goes quiet on you but seemingly goes quiet on the whole world, then he is having a hard time.

He isn’t posting stories of him out having fun. In fact, he has very little or no online presence at the moment.

This suggests he has withdrawn into himself.

He is feeling sad and reflective and is most likely missing you and mulling things over.

3) He is responsive to your messages

Maybe you are the one who reaches out first. You send him a text or message just to see how he is doing.

Even if you haven’t yet addressed the elephant in the room of your fight, he still replies to you. He isn’t ignoring you and is responsive to the contact.

This is a sign that he misses you after a fight and wants to work things out.

4) He hasn’t said he wants to split

Yes, you argued, but neither of you has called it quits yet.

In the heat of the moment, you didn’t threaten to break up and neither did he.

Even if you haven’t spoken to one another yet, the very fact that he hasn’t mentioned breaking up shows he clearly cares.

It is the difference between just an argument and feeling like things are over and can’t be fixed.

Maybe he is waiting to see what you do next. Maybe he is hoping you will talk to him again. Or maybe he is trying to figure out what’s in his head.

Regardless, if you’ve had a fight and he still wants to stay together, he’s most likely already missing you.

Signs he misses you and wants you back

A lot of the general signs he misses you which we spoke about earlier in the article will also apply after a break-up too.

But there are also some additional signs to watch out for from an ex that show he misses you and wants to get back together.

1) He becomes nostalgic

A trip down memory lane when he recalls all the good times you spent together means he is missing the times you shared.

Any attempts to make you think about the happy occasions you’ve had and the memories you created show he wants you back.

He is thinking fondly about your relationship which means he misses you.

2) He gets jealous

If he shows signs of jealousy about other guys who may take his place, it’s obvious he still cares.

Guys tend to be very protective over women they love. It’s a part of their programming. This relates back to the unique concept I mentioned earlier: the hero instinct.

When a woman triggers this drive in him, he’s more likely to struggle to let her go from his life.

And the best part is, that triggering his hero instinct can be as simple as knowing the right thing to say over a text.

You can learn exactly what to do by watching this simple and genuine video by James Bauer.

3) He seems lost

If your ex has been like a lost puppy since your split, then he is definitely missing you.

Without you around, he feels helpless.

He probably doesn’t know what to do with his feelings. If he was able to express them, he might have felt better. But without any words to describe his emotions, he feels even worse.

If he has been acting like a different person lately, it could mean he is trying to prove something to himself or to you.

Whatever the reason, he is struggling to find his way without you.

4) He tries to change

Your ex may try to change his ways so he can win you back.

If he starts doing things differently, such as changing his habits or spending less time partying, it could mean he wants to start fresh.

Or it could simply be a case of him wanting to prove to you he can be responsible.

Either way, he is showing you he wants to get back together because he misses you.

5) He wants to meet

Maybe you hadn’t heard from him since your break-up. You may have even been following the no contact rule in an attempt to get on with your life.

Then all of a sudden he is in your inbox. He wants to see you and asks if you can meet.

Even if he doesn’t give anything away, and you don’t know whether he just wants to be friends or get back together. The reality is that he misses you, or he wouldn’t want to see you.

6) He tries to booty call you

When a man misses you sexually (if nothing else) he is most likely going to try to hook up.

It’s probably late at night when he is home alone and missing you. It could be after a night out when he’s had a bit too much to drink and he can’t hide his feelings.

Any text late at night is often a booty call. If your ex is thinking about you sexually, he is missing parts of your relationship.

7) He talks about you to other people

When we’re so used to being a “we” it can be very difficult to get used to talking like an “I” again.

Especially when your feelings are still strong for your ex.

If he can’t stop talking about you, it makes his feelings clear.

Maybe he tells others how great you are, how lucky he was to have you, or perhaps even that he is missing you.

8) He hasn’t moved on

You may know for a fact that there isn’t any other girl on the scene.

He hasn’t started dating again, let alone got a new girlfriend. If he hasn’t moved on yet, then it’s likely because he isn’t ready to and may still hold a torch for you.

He might be missing you and wants to fix things.

This is especially likely if you too are still hanging out often, speaking all the time, and acting like BFFs.

How do you know if he misses you in a long-distance relationship?

When you aren’t with each other as much due to physical distance in a relationship, you might feel a little bit more insecure.

You want the reassurance that, despite being separated, he is missing you lots. Here are the signs he misses you long-distance.

1) He sends good morning and good night messages

He can’t wake up with you or go to sleep by your side. But that doesn’t stop him from making sure he is still a part of your morning and evening routine.

Those cute little messages that say “morning babe” “hope you have a great day” or “night, I’m going to bed” is his way of staying close even though he is far away.

2) You talk every day

In a long-distance relationship, you can’t see each other in person and so those daily conversations become even more important.

So he keeps texting you throughout the day.

The connection between you is strengthened by hearing his voice or finding out about little things in each other’s days.

Even if it’s only to talk for 5 minutes. That’s enough to make you feel connected.

3) His eyes light up when you FaceTime

Some things you just can’t fake.

That glimmer in his eyes when you chat over Facetime tells you how special you are.

When you’re wondering how to know if a guy misses you by his body language, then the eyes are a great place to start.

Holding your gaze, looking dotingly at you, and a sparkle that is hard to hide are the biggest clues he misses you.

4) He sends gifts

You get a surprise bunch of flowers in the mail. Or maybe he buys you a present online.

It’s a small thing but it shows that he cares. And it helps keep you feeling loved and appreciated.

It’s not about the money, it’s about the gesture which tells you that he is thinking of you and misses you.

5) You totally trust him

Your feelings about him are powerful indicators of his feelings for you too.

If you trust him, despite the miles between you, it shows you have a strong and healthy relationship.

It means he doesn’t give you any reason to doubt his affections for you. He makes you feel secure in the relationship. Which is a sure-fire sign that he misses you.

To conclude: How do you make him miss you when you are not around?

By now you should have a good idea of the signs he misses you when you’re not around.

If you want to guarantee he misses you, the key is getting through to your man in a way that empowers both him and you.

I mentioned the concept of the hero instinct earlier — by appealing directly to his primal instincts, you won’t only make sure he misses you when you’re not around, but you’ll take your relationship further than ever before.

And since this free video reveals exactly how to trigger your man’s hero instinct, you could make this change from as early as today.

With James Bauer’s incredible concept, he’ll see you as the only woman for him. So if you’re ready to take that plunge, be sure to check out the video now.

Here’s a link to his excellent free video again.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get started.

Written by Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash has years of experience writing relationship articles for single females looking for love. After being single for years with no hope of meeting Mr. Right, she finally managed to get married to the love of her life. Now that she’s settled down and happier than she’s ever been in her life, she's passionate about sharing all the wisdom she's learned over the journey.

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