Missing your ex always brings up tough questions in the mind:
What if it had worked out?
What if you didn’t have to break up?
Do they even miss you back?
You’re still willing to give your relationship another chance. You just need to know he’s open to it too.
But since breaking up, getting a read on him is harder than before.
His behavior has changed and it’s confusing you.
Does he want you back or not?
It’s at this point you need to be careful.
If he isn’t being clear about his feelings (or lack thereof), you might be waiting much too long for him.
To help you find some closure and get on with your life, here are 12 signs that let you know he doesn’t miss you anymore.
1. You Can’t See Your Photos Together Online Anymore
After breaking up, it’s natural to get curious about what he’s up to now.
So you hop online, go to see his profile, scroll around and notice something off; there’s something different about his feed.
Then it hits you: the photos he once posted of you together are now gone.
Whether he chose to archive those posts or delete them entirely, one thing’s for sure: he’s getting on with his life.
He’s wiping the slate clean.
He doesn’t want the new people he meets to know that he was once in a relationship.
This is already a telling sign that he’s chosen to remove you from his life already.
2. From What He Posts Online, He Seems Much Happier
You might still be connected online, but you just don’t interact with each other as much.
You can still view the photos and status updates he posts online.
When you see him share photos or videos of what he’s up to, you notice something: he looks much happier.
You see photos of him smiling with his close friends as they take a roadtrip, and there are videos of him laughing and enjoying his time out with them.
While a part of you might be aching for him again, it’s also hard not to feel happy for him.
And if he’s happy with his life so far, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be with yours either.
3. He Gave You Back His Things
One of the things that get complicated after a breakup is what to do with all the things you each gave to each other.
You might still have his hoodie, while he still has your bracelet.
You wonder if you should throw it (you might have even considered burning it at one point).
But then you hear a knock on the door and see he’s returned a box of the things you gave him.
All the gifts, letters, photos, random items that bring back memories of your dates – everything that would remind him of you, he’s giving you back.
Objectively, these are your things anyway. But it also means much more than that.
While he’s cleaning his room, he’s wiping away the memories of the past.
Maybe not completely erasing them, but he certainly no longer wants to be reminded of them either.
4. He’s Already With Someone Else
It’s been a few months and you’re curious to see what he’s been up to.
You visit his profile and see multiple photos of him with another person.
You think, “Oh they must be good friends”, until you spot them exchanging flirty emojis, and using overly sweet and romantic captions along with their photos.
This can feel confusing; you want to feel happy for him, but you also feel even more heartbroken.
No matter how confusing it feels for you, there’s one thing you can’t deny:
He definitely isn’t thinking about you anymore.
5. He Avoids You
You’re out at a mall when you think you spot him from across a store.
You try to move closer but you notice he’s walking in the other direction.
You try to follow him but you lose sight of him.
In this situation, there’s a high chance he saw you approaching him.
Running away and avoiding any awkward contact is a natural response to this situation, especially if the breakup is still fresh.
If he’s literally trying to avoid you, that could be a clear sign that he doesn’t want to have anything to do with you anymore.
He’s moving on.
6. He’s Distracted When You Try to Catch Up
Since you promised to remain friends, you might’ve still had the chance to talk to him.
But it’s more difficult now.
You can’t seem to be getting his attention.
He’s always looking at his phone, or looking around as if he’s waiting on someone to arrive.
His replies are generic “Uh huh”, or “Nice.”; he doesn’t seem to be as engaged in the conversation as you.
He might only be talking to you to be nice.
But deep down, he might be letting you know he really doesn’t care about you anymore.
7. He Isn’t As Open to You Anymore
Before when you spoke, he’d share about what’s going on with his personal life, what he’s been thinking, and how he’s been feeling. You got to know him more.
But now that you’re separated, your conversations seem shallow.
He’s more reserved, not sharing his thoughts as much.
He doesn’t feel the need to open up to you anymore.
Why would he?
Opening up might only bring you both closer again – something he might be trying to avoid nowadays.
8. You Can Feel It When You’re Together
When you were out together as a couple, you might’ve felt an invisible bond between you.
You just felt the relationship; when you went out to a party, you might’ve even naturally gravitated towards him.
He stood out from the crowd.
But now your energies seem wildly off.
When you try to talk to each other nowadays, there are awkward pauses; you don’t even know what to talk about anymore.
You haven’t experienced something like this since your first date, or even since the first time you ever got introduced to each other.
Now it’s like you’re both strangers.
This might mean he’s already distanced himself emotionally from you.
9. You’re Always The One Initiating
Since you both decided to remain friends, and you might still miss him a little, you want to keep hanging out with him.
He’s a friend you don’t want to lose contact with.
But the more you contact him, the more you realize: you’re always the one initiating.
You’re always the one who sends the first text, or the one planning all the hangouts.
Heck, you might even be the one choosing what food to eat if you have lunch together.
It’s like he doesn’t even really think about you anymore – which is likely true.
10. His Body Language With You is Different
When you were a couple, you could sense he had his undivided attention on you.
He faced you when you were talking, leaned forward slightly to let you know he’s interested in what you have to say, and he’d maintain solid eye contact with you.
You truly felt like there was no one else in the world he’d rather be talking to than you.
It was flattering.
But now, it’s clear he has more people he wants to talk to.
When you’re out in public, he doesn’t even turn his full body to face you.
He’s facing away from you when he talks so you know he’s always ready to leave when he feels the need to.
11. You Don’t Feel Like You’re Getting Anywhere With Him
When you try talking to him, and you genuinely try to reconnect with him, nothing really happens.
You try to get him to open up about what he’s been going on lately, but all you’re getting are generic responses.
He doesn’t let you know about his life because maybe he doesn’t care.
It almost feels pointless even talking to him at that point.
This is a clear sign that he isn’t feeling the same way about you anymore.
12. There’s Radio Silence Between The Both of You
This is one of the most common signs that he’s moved on with his life.
He might’ve even gone so far as to block you on social media, so you can’t even send him a message online.
You barely see his face online anymore, and all you have of him are your saved photos together.
The signs are clear: He doesn’t miss you.
13. Moving On From Him
After spotting the signs, it might’ve confirmed what you didn’t want to be true. He doesn’t think about you as much as you think about him anymore.
At this point, it’s understandable to feel heartbroken, lost, and sad.
But understand that he doesn’t define you. Your life is your life. While moving on may be difficult, that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone.
Reach out to friends. Do the things you enjoy with people you truly love and who love you back.
You’ll eventually find that you never needed him in the first place, and you had it in you to be strong and independent all this time.
Now if you still like him and you want to get back with him, then here are some tips that can help.
5 no bullsh*t tips to get him back
1) Trigger his hero instinct
If you truly want him back and you’re still in contact with him, then you need to try triggering his hero instinct. It might be the missing factor in getting him to miss you and want to be with you again.
The hero instinct is a revolutionary concept coined by James Bauer.
It talks about the three main drives that are deeply ingrained in a man’s DNA, and if triggered, your man will come running back to you faster than you expected.
Tapping into this hero instinct will make him feel better, love harder, and commit stronger to you without him even knowing why.
And it’s so simple to do.
Check out this enlightening free video by James Bauer to discover tips to trigger his hero instinct right away.
The beauty of the hero instinct is that it comes at no cost or sacrifice to you.
You could do as little as sending a 12-word text, and immediately, he will realize that you’re the only woman he ever wants in his life.
He’ll see that he was wrong and that he has found the one he’s been looking for, and he won’t want to spend another second apart.
So if you want to take action today and make him miss you, it’s worth checking out James Bauer’s excellent advice.
2) Stay away from social media…but not too much
The truth is social media works in two ways.
You’ll want to stay away from it as much as possible, even though it’s the ideal distraction from contacting your guy.
Because your online silence will leave him wondering what you’re up to. Especially if you’re someone who’s usually quite active online.
His imagination will run wild – what could you possibly be so busy with that you don’t even have time to pop online?
That’s the first way to use social media to make him miss you.
But there’s one other way you can use it to your advantage:
Strategically post pictures or check-ins, but don’t go overboard.
For example, if you’ve been out with friends, showing off your best life online will make him see how you’re not sitting at home waiting for him to call.
If you’re eating out, you might check in to the restaurant without tagging who you’re with.
Your guy might think you’re potentially on a date, and we all know jealousy is one way of keeping a guy interested.
The bottom line is:
Posting too much on social media takes away the chance of him missing you. Posting the odd picture of you looking fabulous will catch his eye and leave him wanting to know more.
3) Show him how desirable you are
We touched on jealousy very briefly earlier on, but it’s not something to be overlooked.
And while I’m not saying you need to upload pictures to social media of you making out with random guys, there are subtle ways to make him realize how attractive you are to other people.
I remember having lunch with my boyfriend once when we were on a break. A cute waiter was serving us, so I smiled once or twice until I caught his eye.
My boyfriend noticed the waiter smiling back and his expression instantly changed. After we parted, he started texting me more.
The bottom line is:
He missed me more because he was afraid of someone else swooping in and stealing my attention. So, work that charm and show him what he’s missing out on.
Now, that’s one way to do it.
Another effective way is by accidentally calling him.
It’s the oldest trick in the book, I know, but it works.
When you’re next out with friends, in a busy bar or restaurant, “accidentally” call him and leave the call running while you laugh and chat away.
After a few minutes, hang up the phone. Later on, you can message saying how you think your phone might have dialed his number while in your pocket.
If you can make it convincing, he’ll have heard you have a great time and will probably be feeling pretty left out and jealous.
4) Don’t be available too often
Depending on the type of break you’re on, you might still see your guy from time to time.
Many couples take a step back from the relationship to be friends while they work through their issues.
Usually, this is because you still want to be part of each other’s lives, just not as intensely as before.
But as nice as this can be, you don’t want to overdo it.
It’s the same as with texting and calling, it’s fine to keep in touch now and then but if you go overboard, it’ll take away any chance of him missing you.
And the truth is:
If you carry on as if you’re in a relationship (meeting up with him, giving him the good stuff, you know what I mean) he might see no need to end the break.
After all, he’s getting the same as when you were together, minus the responsibility of being in a relationship.
That’s why you can’t be available too often.
Make him crave you. Be busy, too busy to meet up whenever he asks to. See him on your terms, only when it suits you.
And even then, you should be the one to bring a meet-up to an end – of course citing that you’re off to do something interesting and mysterious – so that he doesn’t get too comfortable.
What can happen when he gets too comfortable is that he starts pulling away.
And you definitely don’t want that.
You want him to keep wanting you and to keep thinking about you.
I’ve found through relationship guru, Michael Fiore, how to make even the most commitment-phobic man want to stay with you.
Check out this wonderful free video to see how to use science-based techniques to make him love you, so much so that he never wants to be apart from you again.
5) Look your best when you do see him
But with the previous point in mind, l can’t emphasize the importance of looking your absolute best when you do see him.
Even if you’re past that stage of lust and there are real, deep feelings between you, you can still use your appearance to your advantage.
Never underestimate the power and allure of attraction!
Here are a few tips to help:
- Change up your style. Use the break to get your hair done, buy clothes you’d normally shy away from, just mix things up a little.
- Don’t go overboard. You want to look naturally hot, not with a face full of makeup unless that’s your thing. If it’s not, he’ll be able to tell how hard you’re trying.
- Wear something you know he’ll like. Most guys will let you know when they like a particular outfit or style, so you should have some idea of what he’s into.
- Wear his favorite perfume. Just a light mist of it so he catches a whiff when you lean in to talk to him.
- Use colors that suit you. Whether it helps to make your eyes pop or it gives your skin a glow, pick your colors wisely to help captivate his attention.
The truth is:
Looking your best will come naturally if you follow my point above, about pampering yourself.
Because beauty and happiness radiate from the inside out. So, the better you look after yourself by eating, sleeping, and exercising well, the more irresistible you’ll seem to him.
And when you do meet, remember to keep things lighthearted.
Of course, if you’re there to discuss your relationship things might get intense. But if it’s not for that reason, looking good and keeping things fun (even flirty) will make him miss you more than ever.
I used most of these tactics with my boyfriend (we were on a break for a month or so at the start of our relationship, for reasons I won’t bore you with) and they worked like a dream.
One of the best things that worked for me was triggering his hero instinct.
Once I learned how to trigger it, immediately, I saw how his mood changed toward me for the better.
Long story short, he became obsessed with me (in the best way possible).
This amazing free video from James Bauer truly changed my life and our relationship for the better.
I don’t need to worry about making him miss me anymore – he makes sure we keep in regular contact and not a day goes by without him reminding me of his love.
The simple techniques to trigger his hero instinct found in this free video were more than enough to bring us closer together.
Now, I’m not saying you have to play games and manipulate him.
Far from it.
All I’m saying is that with a bit of tact, a dose of courage, and a little planning, you can make him miss you in no time without even being around him.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.