8 signs you’re giving way too much and your partner is taking advantage of it

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Relationships are like a two-way street. Both people need to give and take to make things work.

But what if you find yourself giving all the time while your partner just takes?

This can leave you feeling drained and your partner asking for more. It’s like you’re running on empty, but the demands keep coming.

It’s not always easy to see when this is happening, but catching it early can save a lot of heartache.

In this article, we’ll point out 8 signs that you might be giving too much and your partner might be taking advantage of that.

Knowing these signs can help bring things back into balance, making the relationship better for both of you.

Sign 1: You’re Always The One Making Sacrifices

It’s a sunny Saturday morning and you had plans to catch up on a hobby you love.

But, your partner asks you to drop it to help them with something they want to do.

It seems to always go this way. Whenever there’s a clash of plans, it’s your wishes that take the backseat.

You’re always the one adjusting your schedule, skipping personal activities, or putting aside your preferences to accommodate your partner’s desires.

It feels like a one-way street, with your sacrifices paving the way. It’s natural to make compromises in a relationship, but it shouldn’t always be you making them.

If you find that your partner rarely, if ever, returns the favor or appreciates the sacrifices you make, it’s a clear sign that the give-and-take in your relationship is off balance.

Sign 2: Your Needs Are Often Overlooked

Remember the time when you were feeling under the weather and all you needed was a warm soup and some tender loving care?

But instead of being there for you, your partner chose to go out with friends. It hurt, didn’t it?

It’s moments like these that make you wonder if your needs hold any value in the relationship.

It seems like your partner’s plans, desires, and whims always get the spotlight while your needs are brushed under the rug.

When you express your needs, you are either met with indifference or your partner makes you feel like you’re asking for too much.

A healthy relationship should have room for the needs and desires of both individuals.

However, if you find yourself suppressing your needs or feeling guilty for having them, it’s a red flag that the balance is tipped unfavorably.

It’s crucial for both partners to show understanding and care towards each other’s needs to build a nurturing and supportive bond.

Sign 3: You Feel Like You’re on an Emotional Rollercoaster

There’s a constant storm brewing in your chest. One minute, you’re the rockstar partner solving every problem, and the next, you’re left feeling unappreciated, even invisible.

The highs are exhilarating, but the lows? They pull you down into a pit of self-doubt and frustration.

This emotional rollercoaster is not only draining but it’s a clear sign that the equilibrium in your relationship is shaky.

While relationships do have their fair share of ups and downs, it’s the consistent pattern of emotional turmoil tied to your efforts to please your partner that’s concerning.

When your self-worth starts to hinge on your partner’s approval or disapproval, it’s time to pause and reflect.

A stable, loving relationship should make you feel secure and valued, not send you spiraling into an emotional whirlwind.

Sign 4: Saying “No” Feels Like a Crime

A simple two-letter word “No” can be a gauge of the health of your relationship. In a balanced partnership, saying “no” to things you can’t or don’t want to do should be okay.

However, if the mere thought of uttering this word to your partner fills you with anxiety or guilt, that’s a red flag.

You might fear that saying “no” will disappoint your partner or, worse, trigger a conflict. So you find yourself saying “yes” even when every fiber of your being screams “no.”

This fear of expressing your true feelings and boundaries is a hallmark of a one-sided relationship.

The beauty of a well-balanced relationship is in the freedom to agree to disagree, to say “no” without fear, and to know that your boundaries are respected and valued.

If saying “no” feels like a crime in your relationship, it’s a clear sign that the scales are tilted, and not in your favor.

Sign 5: You’ve Started Keeping Score

Remember the time when you didn’t mind picking up their dry cleaning or making dinner after a long day at work?

But lately, every favor you do feels like a tally mark on an ever-growing scorecard.

You find yourself mentally keeping track of all the things you’ve done for your partner, perhaps hoping that one day the scales will balance out.

But deep down, a part of you knows that’s unlikely. This mental scorekeeping is a far cry from the effortless giving that once defined your relationship.

It’s a sign that resentment is brewing, and the imbalance in your relationship has started to weigh heavily on your heart.

Each favor you do for your partner should come from a place of love and willingness, not obligation or hope for reciprocation.

When the joy of giving morphs into a scorekeeping game, it’s a signal that the balance of give and take has been disrupted, and it might be time to have a heart-to-heart about the dynamics of your relationship.

Sign 6: You’re Always the Peacekeeper

It seems like whenever there’s a disagreement or a rough patch, you’re always the one smoothing things over.

Whether it’s by backing down from your stance, apologizing even when you’re not at fault, or brushing issues under the rug, you’ve become the peacekeeper in your relationship.

But this role comes at a cost. You might start to feel like your feelings and opinions don’t matter as much because keeping the peace has become more important than expressing your true self.

A good relationship should have room for both people to express their thoughts and feelings openly, without fear.

It should be a team effort to work through issues, not a one-person job to keep the waters calm at all costs.

If you find yourself always playing the peacekeeper to avoid conflicts or keep your partner happy, it’s a sign that the balance in your relationship has tipped.

Sign 7: You Feel Like You’re Losing Yourself

You used to have hobbies, passions, and hangouts with friends.

But now, it seems like your whole world orbits around your partner and their needs.

Your desires, interests, and even your personal growth have taken a back seat. It’s as if you’re slowly fading away, morphing into a version of yourself you barely recognize.

The moments of realization hit hard: when you can’t remember the last time you did something just for you, or when you find yourself echoing your partner’s opinions, forgetting your own.

It’s a raw and unsettling feeling. Relationships should be about growth, about blooming together.

But instead, you feel like you’re wilting away, sacrificing pieces of yourself to keep your partner satisfied.

The essence of who you are should never be the price of admission for a relationship.

When you start to feel like you’re losing yourself in the bid to keep your partner happy, it’s a glaring sign that the scales of give and take are terribly skewed.

Sign 8: You Fear Their Reaction

Every time a situation arises where you need to express your feelings, ask for something, or stand your ground, a knot of fear tightens in your stomach.

You’re afraid of how your partner will react. Will they get angry, disappointed, or give you the cold shoulder?

This fear cages you, muffling your voice and shrinking your space in the relationship. It’s a red flag, signaling that the scales are tilted too far.

Your partner’s reactions should never instill fear or make you feel like you’re walking on eggshells.

In a balanced relationship, open communication and expressing your true feelings should be encouraged, not something that sends shivers down your spine.

If the fear of your partner’s reactions is holding you back from being honest and open, it’s a stark sign that you’re giving too much power away, and the balance in your relationship needs serious attention.

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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