If you have ever looked at someone and thought they must be ruled by the Devil, you might not have been far off the mark.
People are a lot more evil than we tend to think and sometimes they are so seasoned at what they do that it takes us years to realize just how evil they really are.
But it’s not your fault. They are master manipulators. They take every advantage of people to get their way, get the things they want, and leave people feeling lost and broken.
There are many of them out there, and you might be interacting with an evil person regularly but you’ve just decided to label them a jerk.
It turns out they might be much more than that.
I believe there are 20 signs someone who you know is an evil person or toxic person. Check them out:
1) They enjoy watching other people be in pain.
If they laugh or smile even slightly at the thought or sight of someone suffering, this could mean trouble.
Generally, we think that karma can be a laughing matter, but when someone genuinely seems tickled pink about someone else’s pain, they might be evil.
This reaction is actually known as schadenfreude. According to Adrian Furnham, Ph.D. in Psychology Today, it’s defined as “exquisite joy and smug satisfaction from contemplating and reveling in the misfortune of others.”
No one should look down on someone’s pain for the gain of pleasure for themselves.
2) They need to control everything.
Evil people need to have their way, and they will do everything they can to ensure that.
At every turn, they are injecting their opinion and action into a situation to ensure it goes a certain way.
At first glance, people who seem to be control freaks appear as worriers or people who like things “just so,” but if you look closer, they are people who always get what they want and will put on any face to get it.
3) They manipulate everyone.
Like lying, evil people manipulate people and situations to bend to their will. They’ll cry to turn the attention away from you toward them.
They’ll kick up a fuss if they aren’t getting their way, and guilt people into doing things for them.
It’s frightening how much evil people go to great lengths to bend fate in their favor.
They’ll even love bomb you to make you feel great, then they’ll use that feeling to manipulate you.
If there are selfish people in your life who are trying to manipulate you, then you simply have to learn to stand up for yourself.
Because you do have a choice in the matter.
One resource I highly recommend to help you do this is Ideapod’s extremely powerful free masterclass on love and intimacy.
World-renowned shaman Rudá Iandê will help you to identify selfish people in your life so that you can be empowered to make a change. Most importantly, he’ll also teach you a powerful framework which you can start applying today to truly free yourself from them.
Rudá Iandê isn’t your typical shaman.
While he does spend time with indigenous tribes in the Amazon, sing shamanic songs and bang his drums, he’s different in an important way. Rudá has made shamanism relevant for modern day society.
He communicates and interprets its teachings for people living regular lives. People like me and you.
What I learned from watching this free 60 minute masterclass is that the relationship I have with myself is mirrored in my relationship with others. I realized it was very important for me to develop a better relationship with myself.
A word of warning. The teachings Rudá shares in this masterclass aren’t for everyone. He doesn’t help you to avoid your fears or sugarcoat what’s happening in your life.
This masterclass is for you if you appreciate honest and direct advice and want to be honest with yourself about what’s needed to change your life.
4) They hide their true selves.
Lie much? Evil people do, and it’s because they don’t want you to see the real them.
After all, who wants to admit they are actually evil?
Not many people take pride in that kind of title. So they hide their true selves as much as possible and that means getting caught in lies on many occasions.
(Buddhism can teach us a lot about dealing with toxic people. Check out my best-selling guide to Buddhism and eastern philosophy here).
5) They leave you with a weird feeling whenever you are around them.
If you feel drained and tired after being around someone who is actually evil, you get that weird feeling in your stomach when you are around them, and something about them just doesn’t sit right with you; you might be onto something.
Don’t ignore your gut instincts about people. You are usually right.
6) They show no remorse.
Even after hurting someone, whether by accident or on purpose, they don’t show any remorse.
You see this in court-room settings when murderers accept their sentencing without batting an eye, but you don’t usually see it in the boardroom.
It happens though, more than we’d like to admit.
And you can be assured that people who don’t show any emotions are not good people.
7) They are mean to other people.
Why would one human being be mean or cruel to another human being? Aren’t we all just trying to get through this life together?
It turns out that evil people take a great deal of joy in hurting other people and if your friend is always stabbing someone in the back, chances are they are not really your friend at all. They are extremely difficult to deal with.
8) They don’t take responsibility for their actions.
There’s no situation in which an evil person would stand up and say “yes, that was my fault.”
They are always blaming someone else when something goes wrong and they love to play the victim.
They simply won’t take responsibility for any of their wrongful actions.
9) They come with a reputation.
If you’ve heard about this person before actually meeting them, chances are the reputation is true.
For the most part, a person’s reputation really does precede them, and if you get weird vibes that go along with such a reputation, you are probably correct in assuming something is not right with this person.
10) They only come around when they need something.
What’s worse than a friend that stabs you in the back?
A friend that only calls when they need something.
And that something usually means you need to go way out of your way to help them out, which you do, because they lay on a thick guilt trip and get you to do the things they want you to do – every time.
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11) They laugh at the misfortune of others.
While it might be funny to watch a trending video of someone falling on their face while walking down the road, in real life, it is not quite as funny.
If you find someone in your life taking pleasure in the misfortune of another, it might be because they are toxic.
They may tell you it’s all in good fun, but the truth is that toxic people don’t have the wherewithal to see things from other people’s perspectives and what might seem hilarious to them is quite disturbing to others.
When you think about it, it’s kind of creepy that someone would laugh at another person getting hurt.
12) You get a strange vibe from them.
It doesn’t matter what they are doing, you just can’t seem to relax around them, and you keep thinking they are going to say or do something that is not appropriate.
Evil people don’t know what boundaries are, and they like to stomp all over them anyway, so it doesn’t matter if they recognize any boundaries you have in your life.
Sometimes, you’ll feel this feeling so strong that you can’t be around someone without ever really knowing why.
Pay attention to what your gut is telling you – your body can pick up bad vibes from other bodies and will try to make you see what kind of person is really in front of you.
13) They are mean to animals.
It’s hard to believe that people are mean to animals, but it happens every day. And if the person in your life is not actually being mean to animals, but is just ignoring them, it might be just as bad.
People who have no connection to other living things are not just toxic; they are thought to be some kind of evil.
What’s more, people who hurt animals often go on to harm human beings, so steer clear of people who aren’t kind to animals.
14) They think it’s funny when they insult you.
There’s something sick and twisted about a person who tries to laugh at your expense and insults you while trying to be funny.
The two don’t go together, and it’s even worse when people try to undermine you with humor.
It’s uncomfortable for everyone. Toxic people don’t understand how humor should be used, and it’s a clear sign that you should steer clear from them.
It’s harder than you might think to put someone out of your life who is toxic, so be sure to look for these signs before you get into a relationship with someone and save yourself a lot of trouble.
15) Evil people lie. A lot.
Whether they are lying about the grocery bill or the weather, they find something to lie about on a regular basis. They can’t help it.
They need to complain or exaggerate life to make it interesting. It’s usually done at the expense of others – and they’ll lie about other people, too.
It’s awkward when you catch someone in a lie, but that doesn’t mean you should shy away from calling someone out on their lies.
It might mean that you can’t work with someone or be with someone anymore if their lies are starting to impact your life, but it is a necessary step to remove the toxic person from your life.
16) Evil people manipulate everything and everyone.
You’ll know a toxic person when you see them trying to get everyone to do everything for them.
They will find a way to get someone to do just about anything they want, and it’s usually achieved by the person through making someone feel bad, putting them down, or being downright mean to them.
17) They make people feel stupid.
Whether you are sharing a dream or a fear, a toxic person will find a way to tell you that it’s stupid.
This can be destructive for many reasons, not the least of which is that it makes you feel like they don’t care about you and what happens to do.
This is common in abusive relationships, but also between friends where one is toxic and takes out their thoughts and feelings on the other, seemingly weaker friend.
18) They don’t know what guilt is.
One of the weirdest things about an evil person is that they don’t feel bad for their actions.
They’ll never apologize for what they’ve done unless it benefits them in some way; think abusive relationships where one partner promises to never “do it again” and then turns around and does it all over again. It’s called a vicious cycle for a reason.
19) Evil people don’t get it.
One of the big red flags about someone who is toxic and evil is that they can’t feel empathy.
Regardless of the situation, they cannot put themselves in someone else’s shoes…or, they don’t want to. If you come across someone who can’t see the misery they are causing, it’s likely they are toxic.
20) Everything is about them.
They’ll manipulate or lie to get anything they want. How they affect other people simply doesn’t matter.
If you’re in their way, watch out, because they’ll have no remorse in hurting your feelings to get what they want.
(Manipulative and toxic people can only ruin your life if you let them. Learn how to stand up for yourself by embracing your inner beast. Find out how in Ideapod’s free masterclass)
How To Deal With an Evil Person
1) Get angry
Here’s a piece of counter-intuitive advice if you want to break free from evil people: get angry with them.
I think getting angry can be an excellent catalyst for making real change in your life. Including moving on from toxic relationships.
Before I explain why, I have a question for you:
How do you deal with your anger?
If you’re like most people, then you suppress it. You focus on having good feelings and thinking positive thoughts.
That’s understandable. We’ve been taught our whole lives to look on the bright side. That the key to happiness is simply to hide your anger and visualize a better future.
Even today, positive thinking is what most mainstream personal development “gurus” preach.
But what if I told you that everything you’ve been taught about anger is wrong? That anger — properly harnessed — could be your secret weapon in a productive and meaningful life?
Shaman Rudá Iandê has totally changed how I view my own anger. He taught me a new framework for turning my anger into my greatest personal power.
If you too would like to harness your own natural anger, check out Ruda’s excellent masterclass on turning anger into your ally here.
I recently took this masterclass myself where I discovered:
- The importance of feeling anger
- How to claim ownership of my anger
- A radical framework for turning anger into personal power.
Taking charge of my anger and making it a productive force has been a game changer in my own life.
Rudá Iandê taught me that being angry isn’t about blaming others or becoming a victim. It’s about using the energy of anger to build constructive solutions to your problems and making positive changes to your own life.
Here’s a link to the masterclass again. It’s 100% free and there are no strings attached.
2) Set limits
Evil and toxic people will wallow in their problems and won’t care about yours. You’ll feel pressure to listen to their complaining and negativity but DON”T get sucked in.
You can avoid this by setting limits and distancing yourself when necessary.
When they’re complaining about someone, ask how they intend to fix the problem. They won’t have an answer and you can end the conversation.
3) Don’t die in a fight
You’ll feel a lot of unchecked emotion when you talk to an evil person. Don’t let that emotion get the better of you.
Stay calm and collected and realize that they’re just evil and you’re not. Be mindful about the way you’re reacting and take the higher ground.
4) Rise above and don’t get sucked in
Evil and toxic people can drive you mad because their behavior doesn’t make sense.
So remember, when their behavior has no logical reason to it, why would you let yourself get sucked into it?
Get away from them emotionally. You don’t need to respond.
5) Stay aware of your emotions
You can stop someone from your pushing your buttons but staying aware of your feelings. Look at your reactions, take a step back and ask yourself what the rational way to respond is.
This is a time when practicing mindfulness and being aware of yourself without negatively judging is handy.
6) Establish boundaries
Just because you have to engage with a toxic or evil person at work doesn’t mean you have to be friends with them. Establish your boundaries and stick to them.
7) Don’t let anyone limit your joy
You’re in charge of your experience of reality. Don’t let someone who is irrational and evil ruin your day.
Choose to see the things that you want to see in life and ignore all else. This is your ship and you’re in charge of where it sails.
8) Focus on solutions, not problems
Don’t just focus o the horrible characteristics of this evil person. Choose to look at the solutions. How can you avoid spending time with this person?
How can you avoid getting locked in conversations with them?
If you know anyone who matches this criterion, then it’s best that you stay away. Evil people don’t care about other people’s feelings, and they’ll have no remorse in getting what they want.
If you can’t get away from an evil or toxic person, then I suggest you have a look into the Gray Rock Method. This is a known method on how to deal with a toxic person you can’t avoid.
Watch out for these signs that someone wants to destroy you
According to the author of 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life, approximately 80 to 90 percent of people are who they say they are and they’ll do what they’ll say they’ll do.
However, the bad news is that there is 10 percent of bad people who can negatively affect your life if they decide to target you.
She says that they can destroy your reputation and even your career. This is because these people have a “high-conflict personality”.
The number one sign of this kind of personality?
They cause conflicts compulsively, and they focus in on one person – and verbally, emotionally and sometimes violently attack them even if the initial conflict was minor.
Now it’s fair to say that we want to avoid these kinds of people, so if you think you’ve encountered someone who might be like this, look for these signs:
1) All-or-nothing language
They tend to make statements such as, “people are ALWAYS rude to me” or “people ALWAYS disrespect me”.
They’ll try to get you on their side by making it seem like the world is against them.
Over time you’ll see that it’s really them vs the world.
2) Emotional intensity
They can be incredibly negative. If something is a minor inconvenience, they’ll still act like it is the worst thing in the world.
Also, they might struggle to respect your boundaries, and they’ll get uncomfortable if you don’t take their side in an argument.
This is a big one. Not only do they get annoyed easily but they’ll do so in an aggressive manner.
Even if they appear nice, they’ll suddenly react aggressively to something even minor.
Then after that, they’ll deny that they reacted aggressively.
4) Blaming others
As we mentioned above about evil people, no matter what it is, nothing is their fault. They don’t take responsibility for anything.
If you’ve noticed these signs, then you’ll want to proceed with caution.
Here’s what you shouldn’t do when dealing with a high conflict personality that wants to destroy you:
5 things NOT to do to a high conflict personality
1) Don’t try to give them insight into their behavior.
It will fall on deaf ears and will only cause more conflict.
2) Don’t ask about past events.
They’ll play the blame game and act like the world is against them.
3) Try to avoid emotional confrontations.
Don’t get upset or emotionally reactive. Be calm, logical and detached.
4) Telling them they have a personality disorder is a bad idea.
This will only serve to escalate the tension. Make sure to keep your wits about you to avoid getting attached emotionally.
You want to limit the amount of time you spend with these people, and there’s no benefit in starting fights with them.
If you can’t avoid being with someone like this, then don’t get attached to anything they say. You just have to rise above and focus on your actions. Act with integrity and don’t let anything they say to get you down.
How to tell if someone wants to hurt you
It can be tough to figure out whether someone wants to hurt you.
After all, sometimes people hurt others but they don’t know they’re doing so. They’re simply careless.
Other times, however, someone could be trying to hurt you, and that’s what you need to watch out for, particularly if they’re an evil person.
So here’s what to do if you think someone is trying to hurt you.
1) Is it intentional? Or is it a misunderstanding?
This is important to know. It’s important to listen to your intuition to figure out whether it’s intentional or not.
You will most likely know. If you’re unsure, then it probably means that it’s not intentional.
If you think that they’re an evil person (as we described above) then they’re most likely trying to hurt you.
Here are some signs that someone could be intentionally trying to hurt you:
1) Are they using belittling, mixed signals and redirection tactics to make you feel like you’re not important?
Sometimes this could be that whenever you express your opinion, they simply redirect the topic to something else.
Or they’ll try to make your opinion look like crap.
If they consistently do manipulation tactics like this, then they might have something against you.
2) Do they play upon your insecurities and fears?
This will usually come from someone that knows you better than others. They know what makes you weak and they regularly bring it up because they know it gets you down.
They’re trying to make you less confident.
This should be obvious. It’s important not to internalize what they say. After all, they’re just trying to get to you. Don’t get emotionally attached to anything they say.
3) They bring you down but pretend like it’s for your own good.
If they’re telling you what’s wrong with you, then you need to watch out. This is especially the case if they’re pretending like it’s coming from a valid and concerned place.
All they are doing is trying to bring you down so they can bring themselves up. Don’t fall for it.
4) They’ll also try to isolate you.
They don’t want you to get confidence and power, so they’ll start insulting people who are close to you.
They want to break up anything that gives you power, which is those who are close to you.
Keeping you isolated from others enables them to have control over you, and that’s when they feel comfortable.
The result of all of these actions is to get you to not trust yourself. They want to hurt you, and one of the best ways to do that is to reduce your confidence and self-worth.
If you think that someone is trying to hurt you, here’s what you can do:
1) Don’t be defensive and react with hostility.
Don’t get attached to what they say. If someone did try to hurt you, don’t attack them.
This will only cause a battle to ensue. Be logical, explain your position in a reasonable and non-attached manner and try to keep the peace.
This doesn’t mean backing down. It means responding without emotional attachment. Emotional reactions are usually what causes things to escalate.
2) Forget about being right.
If they are narcissistic or they have high conflict personalities, there’s no point in trying to win an argument. They’ll always think they’re right and they’ll never change their position no matter what the evidence says.
Simply disagree, don’t be reactive and get on with life.
3) If you’ve done something wrong, apologize.
If you’ve done something wrong (a legitimate wrong, not something they think you’ve done wrong) then you should apologize. It will keep the peace, and you’ll be someone who is acting with integrity.
Remember, don’t get sucked in and rise above. Nothing outside yourself can affect you. Keep your cool, and focus on what will make you happy.
Signs someone looks down on you
If you’ve encountered someone who looks down on you, you can probably feel that something isn’t quite right.
After all, they feel like they’re better than you and they’re not giving you the respect you deserve.
Quite frankly, these people are annoying to be around, and you’ll want to know quick smart if they are looking down on you.
If you think they are, look for these signs:
1) They are raising their eyebrow.
This is a common body language sign that someone is looking down on you.
They’re second-guessing who you are and what your choices are.
A raised eyebrow is a sign of a lack of respect.
2) They give you the “really?” face.
We all recognize this face. They are passing judgment and second-guessing you.
They think that they wouldn’t do what you just did or said.
3) They shake their head when they give their opinion about something you did.
This is in the same vein as above. They’re disrespecting your opinion or action and telling you that they wouldn’t do the same.
4) They roll their eyes at what you say.
This is just a way to communicate their disbelief and dissatisfaction with you.
If you’re in a conversation and they do this, then they have little respect for what you say.
5) They are saying “what” a lot.
They’re not listening to you, and they can’t believe that they are stuck in a conversation with you.
They don’t respect you, and they think that they’re too good to grace you with their ears.
6) They don’t let you speak.
Perhaps they’ll change the topic when you start speaking, or they’ll start speaking as soon as they see an opportunity (even though you’re talking).
They just can’t be bothered listening to anything you have to say.
7) They keep giving you advice, even though you didn’t ask for it.
They think they’re better than you and that anything you’ve done in life; they’ve done or would be able to do.
Every choice you make or action you take, they’ll have something negative to say. They think that they’re a higher functioning person than you.
If you run into any of these people, then it’s best to stay away. They think that they’re better than you and they won’t give you respect. You deserve better!
How this one Buddhist teaching turned my life around
My lowest ebb was around 6 years ago.
I was a guy in my mid-20s who was lifting boxes all day in a warehouse. I had few satisfying relationships – with friends or women – and a monkey mind that wouldn’t shut itself off.
During that time, I lived with anxiety, insomnia and way too much useless thinking going on in my head.
My life seemed to be going nowhere. I was a ridiculously average guy and deeply unhappy to boot.
The turning point for me was when I discovered Buddhism.
By reading everything I could about Buddhism and other eastern philosophies, I finally learned how to let things go that were weighing me down, including my seemingly hopeless career prospects and disappointing personal relationships.
In many ways, Buddhism is all about letting things go. Letting go helps us break away from negative thoughts and behaviors that do not serve us, as well as loosening the grip on all our attachments.
Fast forward 6 years and I’m now the founder of Hack Spirit, one of the leading self improvement blogs on the internet.
Just to be clear: I’m not a Buddhist. I have no spiritual inclinations at all. I’m just a regular guy who turned his life around by adopting some amazing teachings from eastern philosophy.
You may also like reading:
- What J.K Rowling can teach us about mental toughness
- I was deeply unhappy…then I discovered this one Buddhist teaching
- How a regular guy became his own life coach (and how you can too)
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