In the past, it was unheard of for an older woman to want to sleep with a younger man. It’s no longer the case.
In short: a shift in societal norms.
As women age, they tend to experience a spike in their sexual interest and overall attractiveness. For that reason, women in their 40s and 50s often find themselves being pursued by men two decades – or even more – their junior.
So what are the signs that a cougar wants to sink her claws and perhaps teeth into you?
Read on to find out.
1) She’s less concerned about how you look
She’s not interested in whether or not you’re wearing the latest trainers, nor if you’re sporting the trendiest haircut of the season.
She’s interested in you and not the shallow material trimmings that younger women worry about.
She’ll want to get to know you, find out what makes you tick. As opposed to younger women, she’ll be a lot more interested in what you have to say and how you make her feel, rather than just how you look.
This will undoubtedly make you feel wanted and desired!
Older women make you feel like a hot commodity because they don’t have the same array of options that younger women do.
In fact, she’ll be more physical with you.
If you opt to sleep together on the second or third date, she will expect it to happen.
The reason is that older women are used to getting what they want and are unafraid of expressing themselves sexually.
2) She makes you feel like a teenager again
When pursuing a younger man, it’s often easier for older women to see you as a boy and not a man.
That can make the experience more fun but also less erotic and sexual.
Older women are often drawn to younger men because they want to feel desired, not coddled or pampered.
They want a partner who is confident in his masculinity and sexuality so that he can meet her needs instead of treating her too gently.
3) She’ll touch you intimately
It’s not uncommon for older women to touch you or make contact in a sexual way on the first date.
That’s because she doesn’t have the same hang-ups as younger women when it comes to sex. She is more than likely more confident and comfortable with her body, especially when it comes to sex.
Your date will likely feel free to touch you wherever she pleases, including your backside and other intimate places.
4) She’ll talk to you in a sensual tone
Another clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you lies in the tone of her voice and the way she speaks to you.
Her voice will ooze sex appeal and she’ll make loads of references to sex and intimacy during your conversation.
But, it’s not just wham, bam, thank you, mam.
You’ll likely have a very deep conversation with her or have a steamy exchange of information about your body that leaves both of you with an increased level of interest.
5) She’ll be affectionate with you
Older women have more experience.
While younger women are afraid of showing their interest and affection in case it triggers her, older women often find that they can express their desire and attraction more freely.
A clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you will be the fact that she won’t be able to keep her hands to herself.
6) She’ll be open about her sexuality
She won’t be afraid to ask for what she wants or speak about sex in a clear and confident manner.
Nothing will be off-topic and she’ll definitely be well versed in all things that happen behind closed doors.
7) She’ll bite her lip when talking to you
Older women are used to flirting and expressing their sexuality.
They are also well aware that men tend to be attracted to a woman’s curves, so if she wants to hold your attention, she’s going to have to make you feel as if you’re the only thing on her mind.
She’ll likely twirl her finger around her hair, lean towards you and bite her bottom lip suggestively while engaging in a conversation with you.
If this is the case, it is a very clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you.
8) She’ll focus her attention on you
It’s more than likely that most of your young dates have been eyeing other people at the bar or checking their phones without you noticing.
When you’re dating an older woman, you won’t ever have to worry about this issue.
Older women have confidence in their sensuality and sexiness, so if they want something, they’re going to be fully focused on getting it.
If all her attention is locked on you then it’s a clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you.
9) She’ll give you a quick kiss
Older women are definitely not afraid to take the lead when it comes to affection and this includes kissing
Even if you haven’t kissed her yet, she won’t be afraid to kiss you.
She’ll probably view a physical show of affection as being helpful in determining whether or not the two of you have a chemistry that could lead to intimacy.
10) She’ll wear provocative clothing around you
A clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you will lie in her outfit.
Think low cut, curve accentuation, and short skirts.
Even if she’s wearing a conservative outfit, there’s a good chance that she’ll take it off in seductive and tantalizing ways.
She might slowly strip down to her underwear at home or unbutton her blouse to tease you as you drive her home.
11) She’ll continue to touch you intimately while flirting with you
If she keeps touching your leg, backside or chest when the two of you are together, it’s because she wants you to know that she likes what she sees and wants more.
As I mentioned earlier, she won’t be able to keep her hands off you and you’ll be her whole world.
If you’ve encountered this, it’s yet another clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you.
What are you waiting for?
12) She’ll flirt in subtle ways
Older women have years of experience in flirting and seducing their dates.
Even if she is subtle, her intentions are clear to you. Older women know the importance of making you feel sexual, so even if she’s not acting on it, she’ll get the point across.
13) She’ll make herself available to you over and over again
Older women know that nothing is as valuable as time and that the more you’re around them, the more likely it is that you’ll find them sexy and want to be with them. So if they feel drawn to you, they’ll make themselves available to you over and over again. They also won’t care whether or not it’s a good time for you; she just wants to get together.
14) She’ll be clear about what she wants
Just because she’s older doesn’t mean that she’s not a woman who gets what she wants.
A lot of older women have had to be in control of their lives at some point and know how to go after what they want when they want it.
That means that she’ll be able to tell you exactly what she’s looking for and if you do what she wants, you’ll be rewarded with her company.
15) She’ll be able to connect with you on a deeper level
With age comes wisdom.
Older women tend to have more time and experience than younger women when it comes to dating and being intimate, so she’ll likely be able to connect with you on a deeper level.
She’s experienced life and will have a lot of knowledge to share with you and she will do it in such a way that both of you will find it easy to open up.
She’s most likely had children and had to deal with relationships in the past, so she’ll be able to give you some good advice.
16) She provides you with obvious and inviting looks
Older women are used to men being interested in them, so she’ll likely be very good about expressing her desire for you.
She’ll give you steamy and inviting looks that tell you she wants to be touched, kissed, and made love to.
She’ll make eye contact with you continuously and she’ll look you up and down as if you’re a snack she’s about to devour.
If this resonates with you, it is another of the clear signs that an older woman wants to sleep with you.
17) She’ll be more than willing to move fast with you
Forget taking things slow.
If an older woman wants to sleep with you you might skip home base and go straight to the home run.
Older women don’t waste time or have time to waste when it comes to getting what they want.
So while younger women might want to take it slow, a mature and experienced woman will be more than willing to move fast with you and skip the dating game altogether.
Don’t be surprised if she’s not interested in dating and is happy to be friends with benefits.
18) She’ll encourage you to touch her
With an older woman, you don’t have to worry about overstepping your mark,
In fact, an older woman knows that the greatest aphrodisiac is touch, so she’ll likely encourage and welcome your touch.
She might even initiate contact first or make a point of touching you first as she does so to show you that she’s available for intimacy.
This is yet another of the clear signs an older woman wants to sleep with you.
19) She’ll be more vocal with her feelings
In fact, she’ll tell you exactly what she wants and won’t beat you around the bush.
Older women know that there’s nothing to be embarrassed about when it comes to expressing their sexuality or making physical contact, so she’ll likely make the first move and encourage you to initiate physical contact.
You’ll also be pleasantly surprised to learn that older women are well versed in talking dirty, so if you’re into that kinda thing, enjoy the ride.
20) She’ll eye your body approvingly
Like you’re a grade-A cut of steak more like it!
Older women are used to checking men out and trying to determine whether or not they’re someone their date could get excited about.
So she’ll likely eye your body approvingly and make a point of touching you to let you know that she likes what she sees.
So, if she’s undressing you with her eyes it’s another clear sign that an older woman wants to sleep with you.
21) She’ll whisper in your ear
This is a huge turn-on for many men. A gorgeous sensual older woman whispering sweet nothings into your ears, telling you what she’s going to do with you when you get back to the hotel.
Whether it’s at a party or as she gives you directions, she’ll likely whisper sweet nothings in your ear frequently.
She’ll also do it in such a way that will make your body tingle and feel as if it’s going to jump out of your skin.
22) She’ll talk about sex frequently
Older women have a lot of experience and are used to talking about sex with their dates, so they won’t be afraid to talk about it with you.
They’ll do it in a way that will make you feel as if she’s behaving quite naturally and that she’s a woman who knows what she wants and isn’t embarrassed to go after it.
She’s also bringing the subject up frequently because she’s trying to gauge your reaction, mostly whether or not you’re down to get freaky with her.
23) She’ll send signals in subtle ways
Older women know that men are known to be oblivious when it comes to reading signals, so they’ll give you nudges and hints that they like you and want something to happen between the two of you.
Whether it be a certain look, the flip of her hair or her rubbing her foot against your leg under the table at the restaurant.
If she wants you, you definitely won’t miss the signs.She won’t let you!
24) She hugs you and feels you up while doing so
Older women are known to have a lot of experience when it comes to dating and intimacy, so they’ll likely use their body to get your attention.
She’ll give you hugs that feel very warm, nurturing, and sensual. And, while she’s at it don’t be surprised if her hands go wandering.
If she’s copping a feel, you can bet your bottom dollar she wants a piece of you.
How old is too old?
The truth is that as long as you’re healthy and have a good head on your shoulders, age really doesn’t matter.
There are men who prefer older women and there are men who prefer younger women.
The key to dating an older woman is understanding that she has a lot of experience in the dating world and that she’s not interested in wasting time with small talk or playing games.
She knows what she wants and how to go after it. If you’re ready to be with a woman who’s sexual, confident, adventurous, and understands that life is too short to spend it doing things you don’t want to do, then maybe she’s the right one for you.
What are the benefits of dating an older woman?
There are many benefits of dating an older woman. She’s more likely to be financially stable, she’ll know what she wants and have a clear plan on how to go about getting it.
She won’t waste your time with small talk, she’ll be open and honest about her feelings and will likely have a lot of dating and sexual experience under her belt.
On the flip side, she’ll be more patient and understanding about you and the things you’re going through. She’ll have a wealth of knowledge about life and will be able to teach you new things that you didn’t know before.
She’ll also be more sexual than a younger woman, so if you’ve had a dry spell or are still new to the dating world, dating an older woman might be exactly what you need.
What to expect when dating an older woman?
If you want to date an older woman, here’s what you should do.
1) She’ll have a lot of experience with dating, so don’t expect small talk from her
She’s had more than enough time to figure out what works and what doesn’t work in the dating world — that’s why she’s on an older dating site, isn’t it?
And that’s also why she knows there are men out there who are into younger women and is willing to meet them.
2) She’ll be open and honest with you
As she’s older, she’ll understand that men need to know how they can make a woman feel good. And how’s she going to do that?
With sex and intimacy. So if you’re not interested in going there with her, don’t expect her to take it well. And if you are, then you should know what’s what. If sex on the first date is a deal-breaker for you, then she’s not the right match for you.
3) She’ll be brutal and honest with her opinions
Once a woman reaches a certain age, she’s no longer interested in what people think about her.
Brace yourself for the cold, hard truth. She won’t sugar coat things, nor will she tell you what she thinks you need to hear.
She will give you her God’s honest opinion without mincing her words.
4) She’ll be more patient and understanding of you
Older women have a lot of experience with life, they’ve been there and they’ve done that.
They’ve worked hard to get to where they are today, so dating one will likely make you feel like she’s an old friend that you’ve known for a long time.
Don’t be surprised if she starts giving you advice about the things that matter in your life or if she tries to guide you in the right direction by having you meet the right people.
5) She’ll show you a good time if you’re up for it
Older women are often sexually discerning and don’t like to waste their time with small talk or cheesy conversations. But if you’re up for it, they’ll be more than happy to meet up with you and have a good time.
So now that you’re aware of the clear signs an older woman wants to sleep with you, what you do with this information is up to you.
I know I’ve said it before, but the best thing you can do at this point is to play it by ear.
If you see a woman who knows what she’s talking about, take her advice and follow her lead.
And if you don’t… well… that’s okay too.
At least now you can have a better understanding as to why older women seem to be so attractive.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.