Adrian Volenik
Some people are like a riddle wrapped in an enigma when it comes to their feelings. They’re just incredibly hard to read and are closer to robots than living, breathing humans.
That’s a tough situation for you if you’re eyeing someone who has these “qualities.”
However, there’s still some prospect for you, and that’s where this article comes in. In it, you’ll learn what signs show an emotionally unavailable person has deep feelings for you.
1) They’re finally initiating contact
Anyone who’s met an emotionally reserved person knows they typically wait for you to initiate contact.
But when they care deeply about you, they break this pattern by reaching out first, whether through a simple text, a call, or making plans to see you.
They typically don’t do that unless they absolutely have to or if they have deep feelings for someone.
This is also true for the following:
2) Unusually for them, they’re sharing personal stories
Emotionally unavailable people keep their personal stories guarded. They don’t like sharing personal stories more than they need to and are extremely private individuals.
I should know because I’m emotionally unavailable, too. In fact, what I’m sharing on this website I’m not sharing with anyone in real life.
Putting things in writing is much easier, though. I use this chance to vent and hopefully entertain my readers.
That’s how I know that when someone who’s emotionally unavailable develops strong feelings, they gradually let down their walls.
They might share experiences from their past, talk about their vulnerabilities, and reveal their inner thoughts and feelings, allowing you to get to know them on a deeper level.
3) They do random acts of kindness for you
You can recognize when someone is reserved after you’ve asked them only a couple of questions.
And if you get to know them better, you’ll learn that they aren’t big into showing affection or gratitude to others. It’s just not who they are or feel the need to do.
So if they start showing you their affection, they might surprise you with thoughtful gestures and gifts when you least expect it.
These acts of kindness prove their genuine care for you and your happiness. For example, they surprise you with flowers, help with work, or fix something.
And if you’re already in a relationship together, they might offer a massage, prepare a picnic, take over your responsibilities, etc.
4) They even express vulnerability
Emotionally unavailable people often struggle to open up about their emotions. However, when they have deep feelings for you, they become more comfortable with vulnerability.
They share their innermost feelings, fears, and insecurities, trusting that you’ll understand and support them.
This is one of the most telling signs, as they normally don’t like doing this.
5) They make time for you
Look, we’re all busy these days, aren’t we? If it’s not work-related, then we have many other responsibilities.
Withdrawn people are preoccupied with work or personal pursuits just like we are, but when they have strong feelings for you, they actively carve out time to be with you.
This includes not just scheduled dates but also spontaneous moments when they drop everything to spend time together.
6) For once, they actively listen
Oftentimes, when you’re talking with an inaccessible person, they seem distant during conversations.
However, when they have deep feelings, they actively listen to you. They not only hear your words but also pay attention to your emotions, providing comfort, empathy, and validation.
When they talk to you, they have a remarkable ability to remember the little things that matter to you. Whether it’s your favorite snack, a song that holds sentimental value, or a place you’ve mentioned wanting to visit. This attention to detail shows their thoughtfulness and consideration, and they don’t do that with others.
At the end of the day, if they have deep feelings for you, they actively work on improving communication.
7) They give you compliments
Commonly reserved with their compliments, distant people or partners become more vocal about expressing admiration and appreciation for you.
They recognize your worth and make an effort to make you feel special with heartfelt words.
I don’t give out compliments often, but when I do, it’s mostly for my wife and kid. They also know the praise comes from a genuine place in my heart because, again, they aren’t that frequent.
Then there’s this, too:
8) They’re oddly touchy
Have you ever seen a touchy robot on TV? Probably not because robots, just like emotionally unavailable people, don’t feel the need for it.
There’s one difference, though. Emotionally unavailable people and partners may not be naturally touchy-feely, but when their emotions run deep, they become more physically affectionate.
You notice them initiating physical contact like holding your hand, cuddling or giving impromptu hugs and kisses to express their devotion.
And if you’re not in a relationship yet, they introduce you to others.
9) They introduce you to others
The step of introducing you to their close circle of friends and family is a significant one. It goes to show that they see you as an integral part of their life and that they want to integrate you into their support system and social world.
As you know, it takes a great deal of trust and vulnerability to introduce someone to the people who are closest to them.
They are letting you into a part of their life that they typically reserve only for those they deeply care about.
10) They make future plans
Emotionally unavailable folks often hesitate to discuss future plans. As I already said, they don’t share much about them and what’s going on in their life.
However, when they’re invested in a relationship, they actively talk about the future. They discuss long-term goals, living arrangements, and even marriage or starting a family together.
If you’ve ever been in a romantic relationship, you know that planning for the future together not only reveals dedication but also strengthens the bond between partners as they work toward shared goals and dreams.
That’s why making future plans is a great sign they have deep feelings for you!
11) They’re even jealous now
While not a healthy expression of love, jealousy is sometimes a sign that they have deep feelings for you.
They might not like the idea of you being close to others because they fear losing the special connection they share with you.
The easiest way to catch glimpses of jealousy is when you look at their facial expression when you talk to others. You can clearly see it in their eyes.
In a relationship, mild jealousy shows that you and your partner find each other attractive and desirable. It’s a reminder that you care about the relationship and want to protect what you have.
12) They’re protective
When they have strong emotions for you, they naturally become more protective. They do this by ensuring your safety, offering to help with everyday tasks, or being there to support you through challenging situations.
For example, when you’re going through a challenging period of anxiety and stress, they make sure they’re available for you whenever you need to talk or just sit in silence.
It’s the least they can do, but it just goes to show how much they care for you.
13) They’re supportive
Apart from being protective, emotionally inaccessible people can also be supportive of the right person.
Their actions speak volumes. They go the extra mile to support you by being a shoulder to lean on during tough times, offering help without being asked, or celebrating your successes with genuine enthusiasm.
When it comes to conflicts and misunderstandings, they’re part of any relationship. But it’s also true that when inaccessible people have deep feelings, they’re more willing to apologize and make amends.
They value harmony and connection in the relationship and will proactively resolve issues that will leave both of you satisfied.
14) They accept your flaws
Finally, they not only accept your flaws and quirks but also embrace them. Instead of being critical, they show unconditional love and understanding, making you feel valued and cherished for who you are.
If you’ve read some of my other articles, you might know that I’m working on being less critical of my loved ones.
It’s not an easy task because I’ve been surrounded by this for as long as I can remember by my mom and dad.
I’m trying to embrace this major flaw in my character and realize that others have their own shortcomings, too.
That doesn’t mean we should shame them for them. On the contrary, we should accept them, and if they want to work on fixing them, encourage their journey.
Final thoughts
Every emotionally unavailable person is different. But they all have in common that they take time to fully express their feelings.
Although the signs I mentioned above are great indicators that they have deep feelings for you, open and honest talk is a much better way to know where you stand.
