7 signs a man will stick by you through thick and thin, according to psychology

You’ve finally met the “perfect” man. 

He’s charming, funny, handsome, and to your surprise, he has the same music taste as you. 

You couldn’t be happier.

But is he in it for the long haul (even when times get tough)? 

Here’s the thing. 

You’ll never truly know what your partner is thinking or feeling. 

That would be too easy.

And men, well, they can be an enigma. However, some science-backed clues can give you a hint about how he feels deep down. 

With that in mind, here are seven signs that suggest he’ll stick by you through thick and thin, according to psychology.

How many do you recognize?

1) You + him = “we” 

You’re not sure exactly when it happened, but one day (out of the blue), “you” became a “we.”

For example:

  • Do “we” want to watch Barbie or Oppenheimer tonight?
  • Sorry, “we” can’t make it tonight.
  • “We” will let you know. 
  • Should “we” leave now?

You get the idea. 

And according to psychologists, a simple pronoun change can make all the difference. 

In fact, studies have shown that the use of “we” (instead of separative statements like you, me, or I) represents commitment, intimacy, and solidary. 

It’s also closely tied to marital satisfaction.

Simply put, you’re a close-knit (we-ness) unit. And that’s because he imagines a future with you.

2) He includes you in future plans

Do you regularly daydream about the pitter-patter of tiny feet? Maybe you’ve already discussed your dream house together. 

Or perhaps… 

He simply includes you in upcoming travel or dinner plans (without a second thought). 

Here’s the thing. 

Experts at Harvard say that there’s a simple (but scientific) reason behind why we daydream about the future with our partners. 

And it all has to do with our biology. 

Let me explain.  

When we’re in love, our body goes through a series of chemical changes. 

A love cocktail of sorts. 

Firstly, it can raise your cortisol levels (a stress hormone). Something that can suppress your immune system. 

Secondly, it can increase dopamine (linked to pleasure) and serotonin (sexual desire). 

Lastly, that leads to the release of oxytocin. A powerful “love hormone” that’s associated with trust, sexual arousal, and relationship building.  

In other words, he’s lovesick. 

In fact, he’s so in love that he’s (literally) addicted to you.

3) He is “addicted” to spending time with you

What do poets, philosophers, musicians, and psychologists all have in common?

Well, they all agree that love and addiction share a lot of similarities. 

But this goes beyond artistic liberties. 

It’s backed up by science! 

That’s right. 

This 2016 study found that love-related changes in the brain mimic that of drug addiction. 

According to experts, these neurochemical alterations can trigger feelings of euphoria, obsessiveness, dependency, and “intensely focused attention” with you. 

What’s more, this “addiction” has them literally “craving for emotional union” with the person they love.

Ultimately, they become attached (and a little obsessed). 

But for someone to really want to stick around through thick and thin (and make time for you), it takes more than neurobiology. 

They also have to enjoy your company. 

Luckily for you…

4) He is your biggest fan (even when you aren’t)

Does your beau constantly brag about you and your accomplishments? Perhaps he can’t help but hype you up when you’re feeling blue?

Maybe he simply makes you feel special – even at your worst. 

Well, psychologists suggest that this behavior indicates that your partner is willing to stick around. 

You heard correctly. 

According to psychologists, couples who see their partner in a “positive light” are more likely to stay together. 

For instance, this study found that partners who idealized each other remained strong “even in the face of conflicts and doubts.”

Some experts dubbing this behavior as “love blind.”

5) He just “gets you” (and your little quirks)

Now I don’t know if I believe in soul mates, but I think we can all agree that we want to find someone who just gets us. 

Not only that. 

But a partner who embraces every part of us (even our flaws) with compassion and empathy. 

Here’s the thing. 

Research shows that empathy plays a big part in maintaining a healthy relationship. 

And I don’t just mean empathy for negative emotions, but positive ones too. 

What’s more, the study found that empathy for positive experiences yielded even greater benefits for couples overall. 

Why is this relevant?

Well, someone with high emotional intelligence is more likely to understand and empathize with your emotions.

Because of this, they can provide support during challenging times and celebrate your successes.

At the end of the day, it demonstrates true staying power. 

6) Your wins are also his

Does your partner actively support you and your goals?

Well, experts say this might be the secret to a long-lasting marriage. 

Let me explain.

In the article, the author emphasizes the importance of “cultivating passion.”

In other words, being engaged, supportive, and devoted to your partner by providing validation.

In fact, they claim this positive approach is “ vital to the longevity of a relationship.”

By that they mean, he acknowledges your successes (or good news) with supportive and cheerful statements.

Ultimately, this supportive behavior indicates a willingness to stand by you through thick and thin.

One way he does this is by actively listening to you. 

6) He actively listens to you

There’s a lot to be said about being there physically, but what about mentally?

Active listening is an often underutilized communication skill.  

Not only does it demonstrate respect, but it proves that someone is invested and present for what you have to say. 

In a nutshell, it’s when someone is truly listening and not just hearing you. 

After all, I’m sure I don’t have to tell you how important communication is for a relationship to work long-term. 

And experts agree.

With relationship guru, Kate McCombs (among others), claiming it can help increase your bond. 

So, how do you know that someone is actively listening?

It’s quite simple really. 

There’s a long list of verbal and non-verbal cues to watch out for. 

For example…

Eye contact, paraphrasing, empathy, and appropriate facial expressions… to name a few.

Mostly, though, it’s about being engaged. Not to mention present. 

7) You are his rock

Lastly, he values your opinion. That’s why he comes to you for advice (big and small). 

That’s right. 

He trusts and respects you. 

Now I don’t know about you. But I can’t think of better proof that he’s in it for the long haul than him sharing his deepest darkest secrets with you.

Especially when you consider that (according to research) men typically hide their feelings more than women. 

But not this guy. 

When he sees you, his pain melts away (literally) – and for a good reason. 

Psychologists found that the sight of a romantic partner can reduce physical pain. Again, this is down to a chemical reaction in the brain brought on by love. 

Those same neurochemicals that promote closeness, commitment, and devotion activate the reward-system and affect-processing regions of the brain.

This includes the bilateral caudate nucleus and right ventral tegmental area. And ultimately, providing him with a safe (comforting) space. 

So, what does this all mean for your relationship?

Well, if you were in any doubt, these seven signs suggest that your man will stick by you through thick and thin. 

Leila El-Dean

Leila is a passionate writer with a background in photography and art. She has over ten years of experience in branding, marketing, and building websites. She loves travelling and has lived in several countries, including Thailand, Malaysia, Spain, and Malta. When she’s not writing (or ogling cats), Leila loves trying new food and drinking copious amounts of Earl Grey tea.

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