9 signs a man will make an excellent husband one day, according to psychology

Are you dating to find a potential husband rather than a casual fling?

If so, you’ve probably realized that finding “the one” involves more than just following your heart.

Finding the right person to spend your life with requires a discerning eye for qualities that predict a successful marriage. 

Thankfully, psychology offers a roadmap to understanding what makes a man a great spouse. 

Here are nine signs, supported by psychological principles, that indicate your man has the potential to be an outstanding husband one day.

1) He is kind and respectful

One sign you can notice from the very first date is how kind the man is towards others.

Observing how a man interacts with the restaurant’s wait staff (if you’re on a dinner date) is an easy way to determine if he is kind and respectful.

Does he speak to them politely or condescendingly? 

Why is this important?

Because the way a man treats strangers is a good indication of how he will treat you.

A man who shows kindness to everyone he meets is more likely to be considerate, empathetic, and understanding in a relationship.

Relationship researcher Dr John Gottman found that one thing happy couples have in common is prioritizing kindness.

Respect goes hand in hand with kindness. A respectful partner will:

  • Value your opinions
  • Treat you as an equal
  • Never resort to demeaning behavior 

This mutual respect fosters a sense of security and trust, essential components of a strong marriage.

2) He is patient and knows how to control his anger

Patience and anger management are critical for the success of a long-term relationship. 

A patient man can navigate the inevitable frustrations and challenges that arise in any relationship. 

The ability to control anger is equally essential. 

A 2021 study published in ScienceOpen found that couples who manage their anger constructively tend to have more satisfying relationships.

The same study found a correlation between the ability to manage your anger and emotional intelligence.

So, a man who can handle stress and anger without lashing out or becoming destructive shows he is mature and committed to maintaining harmony in the relationship.

This emotional intelligence is a result of the following…

3) He is self-aware 

A self-aware man understands his strengths and weaknesses and actively works on personal growth. 

This allows him to understand and manage his emotions, helping him handle life’s ups and downs without becoming overwhelmed. 

But emotional stability is not just important in personal growth. Research has found it also makes a huge difference in relationships.

For example, a research paper published in the Social and Behavioral Sciences Journal found that emotional stability is a strong predictor of marital satisfaction. 

This is because when someone is in tune with their emotions and can regulate them effectively, they can better support and nurture a long-term relationship.

How do you know if your man has a high level of self-awareness?

You will notice the following sign…

4) He is open and honest with you

When a man is transparent about his thoughts, feelings, and experiences, there is more potential for deeper emotional intimacy in the relationship.

Psychologists have found that honesty correlates with higher levels of relational satisfaction. 

Open communication helps partners understand each other better and fosters a deeper connection. 

It also builds trust, which is the bedrock of any partnership.

Moreover, an honest man will respect your need for transparency. Your relationship will have no hidden agendas or secrets, allowing it to last a long time and progress into marriage. 

Plus, because of this transparency, you’ll find that you can resolve conflict much quicker and easier. This brings us to the next sign that a man will make an excellent husband…

5) He actively tries to resolve conflict

No matter how excellent your relationship is, you will have arguments sometimes.

Conflict is inevitable, but how we handle it makes all the difference. 

If your man is keen to resolve conflicts, this demonstrates a commitment to the relationship and a willingness to compromise. 

This is an emotionally mature man. He doesn’t respond to conflict by belittling you, trying to win the argument, or resorting to stonewalling.

Instead, he focuses on mutual understanding and finding solutions.

According to psychologist Dr Jeremy Sutton, this proactive approach to resolving disagreements helps build a solid foundation for a lasting marriage.

6) He is there for you whenever you need him

Reliability and support are vital indicators of a potential excellent husband

A man who is consistently there for you, whether you need emotional support, practical help, or just someone to talk to, shows that he values and prioritizes your well-being. 

Dependability builds trust and reinforces the bond between partners, so it’s no surprise it is linked to relationship longevity.

Licensed counselor Tara Kong, couples states that two partners supporting each other emotionally drastically increases the chance of marriage and staying together.

7) He supports and encourages your dreams

If you want to spend your life with someone, you need someone who will support your dreams. 

Your man should encourage you to pursue your aspirations, not try to stop you.

So, a clear indicator that a guy is marriage material is if he supports and encourages your personal growth. 

When a man celebrates your achievements and motivates you to pursue your dreams, it shows that he believes in you and wants to see you succeed. 

Psychology suggests that this type of spousal support is crucial for career success and relationship satisfaction. 

When both partners act as each other’s biggest cheerleaders, both feel supported in their personal and professional endeavors and thus, their bond strengthens.

But along with not trying to deter you from your dreams, a potential husband mustn’t do the following…

8) He doesn’t try to change you

If a man tries to change any aspect of your personality, this is a huge red flag, and someone who is NOT husband material.

If a guy does want to change a woman, he will try to do so subtly, such as:

  • Encouraging you to pursue different hobbies than your own
  • Questioning the validity of your career
  • Saying bad things about your friends
  • Disregarding your opinions and beliefs
  • Criticizing your appearance
  • Telling you what to wear

These are all red flags because if a guy wants you to change, he doesn’t love you as you are.

You should only consider marrying someone who loves and accepts every part about you – the good and the bad.

A man who loves and accepts you for who you are without trying to change you demonstrates unconditional love. 

This acceptance allows you to be your authentic self and fosters a sense of security and belonging.

9) He is a friend as well as a lover

According to Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Staci Lee Schnell, friendship in marriage builds emotional and physical intimacy.

This is because friendship in a relationship provides companionship, emotional support, and shared interests. 

It also cultivates a foundation of mutual respect, understanding, and shared joy, which helps sustain the romantic connection over time.

So, if your man is not just your lover but also your friend, this demonstrates you will have a long-lasting and deep bond.

Leading relationship expert Dr. John Gottman agrees that couples who view each other as best friends tend to have more robust and enduring marriages. 

Final thoughts

While every relationship is unique, these nine signs can help you identify if your man has the potential to be an excellent husband. 

Kindness, respect, patience, honesty, and reliability are among the crucial traits that contribute to a healthy and lasting marriage. 

By recognizing these qualities, you can make a more informed decision about your future and build a partnership that stands the test of time.

Gemma Clarke

I am a certified yoga and mindfulness teacher and an experienced content writer in the spirituality and personal growth space.
I’m passionate about sharing my expertise through the power of
words to inspire and guide others along the path of personal and spiritual development.

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