9 signs a man thinks you’re incredibly attractive, according to psychology

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We are biological beings, and attraction isn’t a choice. 

When a man thinks you’re extremely attractive, his body language and behavior undergoes certain immediate shifts. 

Whether he tries to show it or not, his behavior will make it clear whether or not he finds you fascinating and sexy. 

Let’s take a look at the insights provided by psychology into whether a man finds you extremely attractive. 

1) He makes frequent eye contact

When a man sees something he likes, he looks at it. That includes you. 

If he’s making frequent eye contact and looking at you for long periods of time or repeatedly, it generally means that he finds you physically attractive

It may also be that your personality and what you say intrigues and attracts him as well. 

As relationship therapist Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT asks

“Intense eye contact usually means someone is into you. When you two chat, does he always make a point to look you in the eyes?”

2) He stands and sits close to you

A man who finds you highly attractive will be literally drawn to you. He’ll try to stand and sit close to you in a room and seek you out, in some cases subconsciously. 

If you’re in a crowded room, you’ll notice that he always seems to be fairly close to you. If you run into him a few times or go out on a date, he shifts to be closer to you at various times. 

This is him getting his body closer to yours: classic attraction at play.

As relationship psychology expert Vin Serai writes:

“It’s not that he’s invading your personal space, but, basically, he’s entering your personal space in a good way. If he’s attracted to you, you notice he sits closer to you than other guys.”

3) His body language speaks volumes

When a guy finds you smoking hot, he will often engage in what psychologists and sociologists refer to as “mirroring.”

This is essentially what it sounds like:

He will  unconsciously copy your body language and often engage in many of the small behaviors and habits that you engage in. 

It’s like you’re in a sort of subconscious, low-key dance, with you taking the lead. 

“People mirror someone’s body language when they like them. Do a little experiment: when you take a sip of your drink, does he take a sip of his?” posits Jeney.

4) He gives you thoughtful compliments

If a man is giving you genuine and thoughtful compliments, it means he’s attracted to you. 

This is especially true if he is complimenting your appearance or something related to your attractiveness level

When he says that he loves your fashion style, he’s unlikely to just be a big fan of Isabel Marant’s new season:

He’s saying he’s into you! 

“If he notices your new haircut or says that he likes your shirt, it means he’s paying attention to you,” notes Serai. 

5) He tells jokes and tries to get you to laugh

A man who finds you highly attractive will try his best to get you to laugh. 

Many women are attracted to a humorous man, but there’s also science involved here as well, since laughter releases dopamine.

When he gets you to laugh and feel happy, he increases the chances that you’ll feel corresponding attraction for him, too. Plus he’ll know that you’re on similar wavelengths when it comes to your sense of humor, which is very important for compatibility. 

As psychology writer Vanessa Van Edwards explains:

“If he’s cracking jokes or acting funnier than usual, it’s a good sign he’s getting his flirt on. And the more a man can make you laugh, the more attractive you’ll find him, since laughing releases dopamine.”

6) He truly listens to what you say and remembers

Men know that women like to be listened to: everyone does!

So going through the motions and nodding and acting all pensive when you say something clearly proves nothing. 

But when a man truly listens to what you say and remembers what you say while being empathetic and clearly caring for real this is often a sign that he finds you very attractive. 

What you’re saying resonates with him, and he truly cares. 

“When someone is interested in a conversation partner, they ignore distractions, pay attention to them, and try to be empathetic,” explains  psychologist Jeremy Nicholson M.S.W., Ph.D.

7) He’s supportive of you and protects you from harm

When a man finds you deeply attractive, his primal evolutionary aspects get fired up and activated. 

This means that his desire to be a protector and provider kicks in. 

He wants to do his best to support you whenever possible and be there for you. 

If somebody is bothering you or bringing some form of harm to you, he’s there to protect you

His desire to care for you and protect you from harm can certainly be part of his overall ethical code, but when you notice he goes out of his way just for you (and not other women or people) that’s attraction speaking!

As Nicholson points out

“When someone is truly in love with you, they will invest in the relationship. They will make a commitment, by claiming you publicly, introducing you to friends and family, and making you part of their life.”

8) He gives you small touches and makes thoughtful gestures

Light touches, pats and affectionate hugs are more than just friendly:

A guy who seeks this out with you is attracted to you and wants to get closer to you. 

Pay particular attention if he lets his touch linger when you shake hands, gives you affectionate shoulder rubs or lets his hugs take a bit longer than needed with a small rub of your back. 

As Jeney observes:

“A light touch shows that he’s interested in getting closer to you. Have you ever noticed that when you like someone, you’ll pat them on the shoulder or reach out and touch their hand?”

9) He seeks further opportunities to connect and meet

When a man finds you very attractive, he seeks out opportunities to meet you, talk to you and see you again. 

Even if your schedule is extremely busy, he will do his best to find a time and place that the two of you can cross paths and spend more time together. 

If he asks for your number or social media contact info that’s a clear sign he’s trying to see you again. If he slides in your DMs on social media it’s also a sign he’s intrigued by you and finds you attractive. 

Online or offline, a man’s impulse to make a connection with you and stay in touch with you will speak clearly to his level of attraction for you.

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