Isabella Chase
We all know men aren’t the best at expressing their feelings.
Yes, that’s a stereotype, but it’s one that’s grounded in reality.
For various reasons, including social pressure, men often struggle to express their feelings.
And the stronger the feelings, the greater the struggle.
Unfortunately for anyone in a relationship with a man, this can leave you unsure of how he really feels.
Sometimes, you need to read between the lines.
Luckily, there are some psychological signs that can tell you that a man really loves you, even if he’s reluctant to just come out and say it.
And we all know that often, actions speak louder than words.
Keep an eye out for these signs that will tell you a man is crazy about you.
1) He is vulnerable around you
The reluctance of many men to share their feelings does have a positive aspect.
Sure, it makes it harder to know how he really feels. But it also means that if he is willing to show vulnerability around you, it’s a strong sign he really loves you.
The thing is, men are taught from an early age to keep their feelings and emotions to themselves.
For many men, the only time it feels acceptable to be emotionally honest and vulnerable with anyone is with their soulmate.
So if a man shares his innermost feelings with you, especially the ones he’s kind of embarrassed about, it’s a good sign is deeply in love.
“The ability to expose ourselves to another and trust that our partner will still accept an unfiltered version of us may be the most challenging task for men,” writes psychologist Isaiah Pickens. “Vulnerability represents a core element in any healthy, long-term relationship.”
2) He makes the effort to communicate well
Relationships are built on communication. Which makes it challenging if you’re in a relationship with a man who is not great at communicating his feelings.
Not everyone is great at communicating their needs and emotions in a relationship.
Some people never learned how, or never had a healthy relationship that would allow them to do it.
But if a man sees you as his soulmate, he will take the time to learn how to communicate with you in a way that works for both of you.
That’s especially true during an argument.
“Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but how couples communicate during a conflict goes a long way toward determining whether the problem will be resolved—or if it will continue to fester and corrode the relationship,” writes psychology professor David Ludden.
If he sees you as his soulmate, a man will work on his communication skills.
He will communicate with you on a regular basis to make sure that both of you are having your needs taken care of by one another.
He won’t try to avoid issues, but will instead be willing to talk them over with you to get the best possible outcome.
3) He respects you
It’s nice being liked. It’s great being loved. But sometimes, all we really want is a little bit of respect.
And if a man sees you as his soulmate, that’s exactly what he’ll give you.
“Respect in relationships is foremost about how you make the other person feel,” writes Dr. Sandip Roy. “One nifty way to build respect is by validating the thoughts, feelings, beliefs, opinions, and values of the person you’re in a relationship with.”
In other words, love isn’t just about wanting to be with each other. It isn’t just about desiring each other. It’s also about respecting each other’s choices, beliefs, opinions, and abilities.
If a man does that, it’s likely he thinks of you as his soulmate.
4) He shares your goals and values
One of the easiest ways to predict whether a relationship is going to last or not is to look at each partner’s goals and values and see how they go together – or don’t.
Your ambitions don’t have to be exactly the same.
After all, we’re all different people with different preferences.
But your goals need to at least complement each other.
So, for example, if your partner wants a job that involves traveling the world, it’s not likely to work out if you need to stay at home.
Sharing values is even more important.
While it’s perfectly possible to have a fulfilling relationship with someone who has different political opinions from you, those opinions need to come from a similar set of values.
In other words, you can disagree on how to be a good person, as long as you both believe that being a good person is important.
“Issues will arise, and you will have hurdles to overcome in your relationship,” writes mental health expert Kristen Fuller.
“Having compatible core values will arm you with the necessary strength and camaraderie to navigate these hurdles together. Shared interests, chemistry, and the attraction will fade and maybe come again, but core values will always be there.”
Core values include things like:
- Family
- Accountability
- Finances
- Gender roles
- Empathy
- Religion
- Loyalty
Agree on these big issues, and chances are good you are each other’s soulmate.
5) He brings you into his life
When a guy is in love, he wants you to be part of his life.
That means he will try to get you involved in his hobbies, introduce you to his friends, and want you to meet his family.
If he sees you as his soulmate, he wants you to be involved in every aspect of his life.
So if you have already met everyone who is important to him, it’s a very good sign.
6) He makes future plans with you
If a man sees you as his soulmate, he sees his relationship with you lasting a long time.
So he won’t be afraid to make plans for the future that involve you.
Maybe he’ll start talking about the two of you taking a vacation together.
Maybe he’ll start talking about what you’ll do for living, or about having kids.
Maybe he’ll even want to discuss how the two of you will spend your retirement together.
“One thing that successful relationships all have in common is that the couples in them make plans for the future, both near and long term,” writes psychologist Barton Goldsmith. “Making plans builds a bond and a stronger sense of security in our hearts.”
So if he plans a future with you, it indicates she thinks your soulmate material.
7) He fights fair
I mentioned earlier how the way a guy communicates can tell you how he feels about you.
That’s especially true when it comes to how you fight.
Look, conflict happens in even the best relationships.
What determines the quality of a relationship is how you handle conflict with one another.
“Some degree of fighting in a relationship is not only inevitable, but also necessary to create growth,” writes psychologist Jessica Kromberg. “The problem for couples is not that they fight—it’s how they fight… couples who have longer lasting difficulty are the ones who don’t fight fair.”
Signs you’re not fighting fair include:
- Emotional blackmail such as guilt trips
- Calling each other names
- Not admitting when you’re wrong
- Shutting down or withdrawing
- Not trying to understand your partner’s perspective
- Trying to ‘win’ the argument instead of trying to come to an agreement.
8) He supports you emotionally
What else are relationships for if not for mutual emotional support?
The thing is, we all need emotional support sooner or later.
Even the toughest and most independent person will eventually need someone to lean on when they go through a hard time.
That’s one of the core responsibilities of someone in a long-term, committed relationship
If a man does that, it’s a good sign he sees you as his soulmate.
“Emotional support is an intentional verbal and nonverbal way to show care and affection for another,” writes psychologist Tchiki Davis. “Receiving this emotional support helps us cope with daily problems, stress, disappointments, and pain and makes us feel happier and more capable of dealing with the troubles of life.”
Providing emotional support means:
- Asking someone what they need
- Listening to them
- Asking questions about what they are going through
- Validating their feelings and perspective
- Checking in with them regularly
The thing is, a man who sees you as his soulmate wants you to be happy.
When he sees you going through hard times, he won’t be able to keep himself from at least trying to provide the emotional support you need to feel better.
How he really feels
Maybe men aren’t the best at sharing their feelings.
But often, actions speak louder than words.
If a man does these things for you, it shows he cares about you and your relationship, and is in it for the long haul.
And if that’s the case, chances are good he truly does see you as his soulmate.
