19 surprising signs a man is hiding his true feelings

Do you think a man might like you?

But you can’t tell because you think that he is hiding his feelings?

It’s tricky to understand what a man is really feeling, particularly when some men are so good at hiding their emotions.

I’m a man and I can tell you this with absolute certainty:

Growing up most guys are taught to hide their true feelings as they might be construed as a sign of weakness.

And as time goes on we get even more skilled at it.

The good news?

Behavior doesn’t lie, and there are plenty of signs to look for to figure out if a man is hiding his feelings.

Look, I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder of the Hack Spirit, and I’ve spent countless hours researching the science of attraction and human psychology.

And in this article, not only will I help you crack the case of whether a guy likes you or not, but I’ll also explain to you how you can tell if he is hiding his feelings as well.

We have a lot to cover so let’s get started.

1) He remembers every little thing you say

When you’re in a conversation, does he remember even banal information you’ve randomly mentioned before?

For example, you told him that you have your sister’s birthday party to attend last weekend.

You didn’t expect him to remember, but it’s the first thing he asks you about when you see him?

It’s a planned question, and men only plan a topic of conversation when they’ve spent time thinking about it.

This is a great sign that he likes you and he’s thinking about you. He wants to stay connected and develop rapport.

Most people wouldn’t do this, let alone guys, so see it as a sign that he has genuine feelings for you.

He may be hiding his feelings, but if he is listening to what you’re actually saying and he is asking you genuine and thoughtful questions, it’s obvious that you’ve been running laps in his mind.

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3) What is his body doing?

While he may be adept at hiding his feelings, he won’t be as good at hiding his body language.


Because body language is something that we don’t consciously think about it. It happens naturally depending on how we’re feeling.

What we do with our body is something we can’t control and it reveals a lot about how we truly feel.

So what body language signs should you look for to figure out if he likes you?

Here are 10 clear body language signs that a guy likes you.

1. Eyebrow Raise: If a man cocks his eyebrows at you, it means you intrigue him. It’s a classic male body language sign of attraction.

2. Parting Lips: He’s imagining himself moving in for the kiss. Plus, it makes him look more “open” to you, so he can appear more approachable.

3. Flaring Nostril: This is a primal instinct that has hung around since the stone age – when men get excited their nostrils flare.

4. Spread Legs: Men have a funny way of showing women that they are interested in them; for example, men will sit across from you with their legs spread wide open as if to show you their crotch. Weird, but true.

5. Hands-on Hips: Power posing is a thing men do all the time subconsciously. Like standing tall, they want to make sure you see the best side of them.

6. Playing with His Clothes: If he’s nervous because he likes you, he’ll fix his shirt over and over again, and he might even button and unbutton his jacket to try to release some nervous energy.

7. Touching his face: When men are excited their faces because more tingly and he’ll start to touch his face and lips in a subconscious way. This could also indicate that he’s nervous (perhaps because he likes you) or he’s interested in you as touching one’s face is a male body language sign of attraction.

8. Fiddle with his Glass: More nervous energy trying to make its way out of the body, men will play with anything around them to let the energy out: glass, bottle, watch, keys.

9. Leaning In: This is an obvious body language of men in love sign. He’ll sit on the edge of his seat while he talks to you and he’ll lean in to let you know that you are interesting to him. Don’t be weirded out by this; he’s genuinely interested in listening to you.

10. Touching Your Back: If you walk near each other, he’ll place his hand near the small of your back to guide you through a noisy party or bar. Plus, he wants to show all the other men that he’s got this. Plus, it’s a reason to touch you and seem like a gentleman all at the same time.

4) Is he acting weird?

While men might be quite good at hiding their feelings, it doesn’t mean it’s easy. And it usually means that their behavior isn’t going to be exactly “normal”.

If he likes you but is trying hard not to show it, then there’s no getting around it:

Here’s going to act weird. He might stumble over his words or try to show off in front of you.

Weirdness usually comes out in terms of nervous energy.

Perhaps he’ll sweat a little more, or even take deep breathes.

It can also play out in terms of banter and jokes.

If they’re constantly telling you jokes or teasing you, then he’s probably interested. Don’t let his weirdness distract you or turn you off.

Just keep playing it cool and keeping it low-key. Once he settles down and realizes that you are into him, he’ll relax and begin to show his true feelings.

5) He feels like a hero around you

Even if he is not expressing his true feelings, does he try to step up to the plate and save the day whenever you need something?

The chances are that he likes you a lot if he naturally tries to protect you.

How can you tell?

Well, does put his body on the side of the traffic when you’re crossing the road? Does he open the door for you? Does he keep a watchful eye on you when you’re talking to a stranger?

These are great signs that he likes you.

You see, there’s a fascinating new concept in relationship psychology doing the rounds which claim that men are more likely to fall in love with women who make them feel like a hero.

It’s called the hero instinct.

The simple truth is that men have a biological urge to provide for and protect women. It’s hardwired in them.

And the kicker?

A man won’t fall for a woman when this thirst isn’t satisfied.

I know it sounds kind of silly. In this day and age, women don’t need someone to rescue them. They don’t need a ‘hero’ in their lives.

But here’s the ironic truth. Men do still need to be a hero. Because it’s built into their DNA to seek out relationships that allow them to feel like a protector.

The hero instinct is a legitimate concept in relationship psychology that I personally believe has a lot of truth to it.

And there’s an art to making a man feel like a hero.

There are phrases you can say, texts you can send, and little requests you can use to trigger his hero instinct.

To learn more about these emotional trigger points, check out this free online video by James Bauer. He is an experienced relationship psychologist who first introduced the hero instinct concept.

Some ideas really are life-changing. And for new relationships, this is one of them.

Here’s a link to the video again.

6) He makes time for you

The truth is, a man that isn’t interested in a female won’t make time for them.


Because in our limited life-span on Earth, time is the most precious resource we have, and where we choose to spend it says a lot about how we truly feel.

So if he makes time for you, plans fun dates, and wants to be near you, then it’s clear that he’s interested in you and wants to keep seeing you – even if he isn’t expressing it.

And it’s not just taking the time to go on dates with you, either. If he is texting you, calling you, or in constant communication with you, then it’s pretty obvious that he is really keen on you.

In the same vein, if he immediately says yes when you ask him to go out with you, and he doesn’t even need to think about it, then you’re obviously a high priority in his life.

7) He gets jealous when you’re around other men

Jealously. A strong emotion that men can’t control. In fact, I’d go as far as saying that jealously is perhaps the most obvious sign that a guy likes you.


Because it’s an emotion that happens naturally, and it’s extremely difficult to stop.

How can you tell if your man is jealous?

When you speak to other men, is he watching carefully at a distance? Is he looking frustrated?

He might even try to interrupt the conversation and introduce himself. Or he’ll appear angry with you after you speak to other guys.

If you want to see if jealously is getting the better of him, you could mention the name of another guy when you’re in a conversation, and if you notice that his whole facial expression and body language changes, then it’s clear that he has feelings for you.

The good news is, once he notices that other men are pining for you and that you’re a woman of value, then it might force him to act quickly and express his true feelings to you.

But be careful about this. He may also run away if he thinks that you like other guys and he has no chance.

On the other hand, if he doesn’t like you, then he won’t really care when you mention other guys.

He’ll just keep his cool, just as you’d expect of anyone when you mention another guy.

He may even probe you further on the other guys on your hand to show you that he just wants to keep things casual.

8) He is drunk dialing you

You’ve probably heard the saying:

“A drunk person’s words are a sober person’s thoughts.”

He may be really good at hiding his emotions when he is sober, but when you drink alcohol it just isn’t possible to do so.

Alcohol has a way of making you more honest with your emotions. So if they’re messaging and calling you when they’re drunk, they probably want to be with you.

They’ve obviously got you on their mind and alcohol is forcing them to take action.

If this becomes a common occurrence, then you can be sure that they want to be with you, but they feel a certain level of nervousness when they are confronting you when they’re sober.

9) If a guy can’t stop wanting to get to know you, he’s probably into you

If a guy is nervous because he likes you, then he is going to struggle to talk about himself. He’ll struggle to get the words out because he’s afraid that it might make him look bad.

The solution to this?


Questions show he is curious and interested. He wants to learn about you. He wants to understand what makes you tick.

If he is actively listening, and asking follow-up questions after your answer, that’s a great sign.

Not only he is a great listener, but his attention is focused on you, rather than himself.

In fact, research has found that men communicate their attraction through focused attention and listening.

We all know that men aren’t the best conversationalists, so if he’s desperate to keep the conversation going by asking you every question under the sun, you can bet your bottom dollar he’s into you.

10) He can’t stop chatting to you through messaging apps and social media

As we’ve said above, it’s difficult for a man to be completely honest with emotions, especially when he is facing his crush.

If he likes you, he’ll struggle to get his words out and express how he really feels.

Perhaps he is afraid of getting rejected, or his nerves are getting the better of him, but you know the one place he can express how he feels?

Messaging apps and social media.

The written word is perfect for expressing how you feel.


Because he doesn’t have to worry about rejection and he can take his time to express what he is truly feeling.

So if you notice that he is giving you long text messages, thoughtful questions and he is really responsive, then he probably likes you.

He might also “like” all of your photos, even past ones that you haven’t recently posted (he’s browsing your profile) or he’ll post witty comments trying to be funny.

Whatever it is, people use messaging apps and social media to make it clear how they are feeling and to communicate a message they’ve carefully thought about.

11) It’s in the eyes

You can tell a lot by a person’s eyes.

A guy who has feelings, but is intent on hiding them is likely to stare from a distance. He may be trying to avoid you. Or attempt to look in any other direction than at you.

But if he can’t keep his eyes off of you that’s one of the signs a man is hiding his true feelings.

Another sure sign he likes you? He makes lots of eye contact.

At this point, he may have given up trying to avoid your gaze.

And just wants to always catch every expression on your face.

If he’s always making strong eye contact, it means he’s paying attention to you.

But it can get tricky because there’s another more subtle clue in the gaze.

If every time you look at him, you catch him quickly looking away, that can definitely be one of the signs a man is hiding his true feelings.

12) He tries to impress you

A guy who is interested in you is going to want to put his best foot forward.

This might mean caring about how he looks when he’s around you, or playing with his hair and clothes.

An interested guy will put some thought into what he wears when he knows he’ll be around you.

Does he find ways to show off?

For some guys, this might be flashy and obvious, while other guys will find more subtle ways to drop hints about how smart and capable they are.

If they have a tendency to tell stories that are designed to impress you, it’s a pretty good sign that they have a crush on you.

13) He helps you

Does he go out of his way to help you?

If you need something fixed around the house, or your computer is acting up, or if you have a problem in life and you need some advice, is he always there for you?

This is a tell-tale sign that he’s hiding his true feelings for you.

Men want to be there for the woman he really cares about. They want to be the first person you turn to when you genuinely need help.

This relates to the hero instinct. I mentioned this concept above.

The simple truth is that male desires are not complicated, just misunderstood. Instincts are powerful drivers of human behavior and this is especially true for how men approach their relationships.

How do you trigger this instinct in him? And give him the sense of meaning and purpose he craves?

In an authentic way, you simply have to show your man what you need and allow him to step up to fulfill it.

In his new free video, James Bauer outlines several things you can do. He reveals phrases, texts, and little requests that you can use right now to make him that he is genuinely helping you.

Watch his unique video here.

By triggering this very natural male instinct, you’ll not only give him greater satisfaction as a man but you’ll help take your relationship to the next level.

14) He sends you mixed signals

It could be that he doesn’t know how he feels, or maybe he doesn’t know how you feel, or perhaps he’s afraid of commitment.

There are a whole lot of reasons that he could be hiding his feelings, but if he is, he’s likely to be sending mixed signals.

From being super sweet one day to cold and standoffish the next, if he can’t seem to make up his mind how to act around you, that is one of the signs a man is hiding his true feelings.

Running from hot to cold could be a symptom that he’s trying to play it cool, and can make reading the signs a whole lot more tricky when he goes from your best friend to distant.

If he openly tells you he doesn’t know what he wants, then you may find the below video interesting. It will help you figure out what he really means.

15) He gives you his full attention

These days who give their full attention to anything for more than 15 seconds?

We’re all constantly glued to our phones, whether we’re checking text messages or looking through posts.

But if he keeps his phone tucked away and focuses his full attention on you, that’s a sure sign his feelings run deep.

When a guy is interested, he makes certain that the time he spends with you is quality.

The kind of quality time a man wants to spend with you is one of the best ways to tell how much a man cares for you.

Always remember that when it comes to affection it is the quality of the time spent more than the quantity.

When you are spending time together, does he go out of his way to make you feel special?

That is a definite sign that he has feelings for you.

16) He lets you know he is single and wants to know if you are

If he’s interested he’ll find a way to let you know he’s single.

And while he may not be opposed to creating a little bit of jealousy, in the end, he’ll let you know that other girls are just friends.

If he’s stressing that the other women he spends time with are just platonic then it’s obvious he wants you to know that he is single.

He’ll also want to find out if you’re single, but if he’s hiding his feelings, he may feel the need to be sneaky about it.

Do you notice him asking lots of questions about related topics, trying to figure out if you’re single without coming out and asking?

Also, if he’s always interested in you potentially dating anyone, it’s a good bet he’s tracking how single you are because he’s interested.

17) He can’t stop smiling when he is with you

If he can’t stop smiling and laughing when he’s around you, then you’re putting him in a good mood. He’s relishing being around you, and he definitely has a crush on you.

He may not want to express it because he doesn’t want to screw anything up between the two of you.

But the bottom line is clear:

If he can’t stop smiling then he loves being around you. And when you love being around someone, there’s usually a romantic factor at play.

In fact, evolutionary psychologist Norman Li says that whether or not someone laughs at your jokes is a huge “interest indicator”.

The main reason?

Because if he doesn’t laugh, it can be perceived as a sign of active dislike.

That’s obviously the last thing he’ll want to do if he likes you.

So if he is laughing and smiling at everything you say, then it’s a great sign he is genuinely into you and he might just be pretending he doesn’t like you.

Just keep going in developing rapport with him and making him feel comfortable. Eventually, he’ll come around to expressing his true feelings to you.

18) Get gets close to you

Even if he’s not ready to come clean about his feelings, if he’s got them, he won’t be able to help himself be drawn to you.

If you find him consistently coming into your personal space, or even that the two of you regularly bump into each other, that could be a sign that not only is he interested in you, but you may unconsciously be drawn closer to him as well.

If he makes casual physical contact, like brushing your arm or even your hair, that’s a potential sign he’s interested.

19) Listen to your instinct

One of the best ways to know if he truly has feelings for you is to listen to your gut.

Intuition can tell you a lot, and if you have a strong feeling that he likes you, you may be right.

Try and think of reasons why he could be hiding his feelings.

Think about what you would do if you knew he had feelings.

If you have a pretty good feeling that he likes you, and you feel the same, maybe you should go ahead and ask him.

Some signs that he’s not interested

There are also several useful ways to let you know he’s probably not interested.

1) He’s always talking about other women

He may want to pique your interest with a little jealousy, but if he’s always talking about other women he’s interested in, then that’s a good sign he doesn’t have special feelings for you.

2) He only sees you when it’s convenient for him

A guy who cares will be thoughtful and considerate.

A guy who just wants someone to hang out with will do it just when it’s convenient for him.

3) He doesn’t text or message

He’ll want to keep in touch and share things if he’s interested. He won’t just communicate the bare minimum but will send you messages and even give you a call.

If he’s only texting when it’s time to make plans and isn’t doing anything to keep in touch in between, that’s a sign he may not be interested.

How to take your relationship to the next level

You now know better than ever that your man has feelings for you, no matter how deeply he is trying to hide them.

But what can you do from here?

Do you sit back and just wait for him to make a move?

Do you give him space and wait for him to come around?

The truth is, if you sit back and wait for him, you could be waiting for a while. Some guys just aren’t good with their feelings. Despite being interested, they are too shy to act on these feelings and actually go after what they want.

But don’t worry, there’s a way you can take this relationship to the next level on your own.

All you have to do is trigger his hero instinct.

Do this, and he’ll be asking you out in a heartbeat. The truth is, he won’t be able to resist!

It’s about getting inside his head and making him see what he’s missing out on, and this new video from relationship expert James Bauer is all you need to make it happen.

You can watch the video here.

James explains exactly what the hero instinct is and how you can trigger it in your man.

What he reveals in the video is the key to a healthy, happy and long-term relationship and it will change your life.

Click here to watch the excellent free video.

New video: How to tell if a man is pulling away from you


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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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