12 relationship mistakes smart women never make

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Smart women are not cold-hearted—when they fall in love, they fall as hard as the rest of us.

But what sets them apart is that they refuse to let their feelings cloud their judgment.

Here are relationship mistakes that smart women would NEVER EVER commit:

1) They never get into a relationship for the wrong reasons

Smart women know better than to commit to a relationship unless it’s for real.

They don’t get into a relationship just because they’re desperate for attention or because they want security or fame…or a warm bed.

And they know better than to get into a relationship just to get over someone or to hurt their ex—rebound and revenge relationships never turn out well!

If they want to heal, they might try to find happiness in their friendships or go consult a therapist. They know that entering a relationship for reasons other than love could only lead them to some crisis later on.

2) They never obsess over their partners’ exes

People have exes—that’s a fact of life.

Smart people know better than to obsess too much about who their partners used to be with, or who they once loved and crushed over.

That’s not to say they’re immune to feeling jealous, of course. But they have their dignity, and they’re not going to compromise it by stalking the people their partners used to be with.

They’re also well aware that it’s just a waste of time.

Their exes are exes for a reason, and they’re better off spending their time and energy on themselves and their partner instead.

If anything, they would rather get along with their partners’ exes than not, especially if their partner remains friends with their exes and crushes.

And if their partner does decide to go back to their ex for some reason? That’s entirely their partner’s fault, not theirs.

3) They never NOT care about how they look

Smart women are adored not just for their knowledge, wit, and intelligence, but also for their looks.

It’s not because they’re obsessed about making themselves look good. They simply take good care of their bodies.

As a result, they end up looking beautiful regardless of whether or not they’re dressing up in their best dresses or putting on makeup.

The biggest benefit, of course, is that by caring for their body they also ensure that they’ll enjoy having a clear mind and plenty of energy to pursue their goals.

4) They never make the relationship their last priority

Smart women have a lot of things they want to pursue in life—from their career and hobbies to outright world domination.

But that doesn’t mean they’re going to put their relationship last. They’re passionate about the things they do, but they’re not going to take it (and their partner) for granted.

Chances are that they’ve made this mistake in the past and have learned this lesson the hard way.

They’re not going to cancel their Anniversary date with their partner just to meet potential clients. Neither are they going to work overtime if their partner is suffering from the flu and waiting for them to come home.

There’s always consequences for every action they take, and they know better than to neglect their relationship in pursuit of their ambitions.

5) They never make the relationship their main priority either

Just because they don’t put their relationship last doesn’t mean that they always put it first either. They cherish and adore their relationship surely, but it’s not their reason for living.

Their real number one priority is themselves, with their partners and kids (if they have them) a close second.

You might immediately think that this makes them selfish, but not really. Selfishness is when you put yourself ahead without regard for how your actions might affect others.

No—smart women merely practice self-love so they can have more to offer.

They might want to be there for their partner, for example, but unless there’s an emergency they’re not going to skip work just to cuddle in their arms all day. Getting fired over being an absentee will only put their financial security at risk and make the relationship a bit less pleasant.

6) They never act like a know-it-all

You might think that smart people are know-it-alls who make it a point to rub their knowledge in other people’s faces.

But on the contrary! They’re the ones who stay quiet and only speak when they need to.

Empty cans rattle the loudest, as they say…and they’re no empty can.

So they won’t say “Listen, you don’t know what you’re talking about…” or “Are you seriously questioning my abilities?” or “Just trust me on this one”.

Smart people remain humble because they are well aware that, though they might know a lot, there’s also a lot that they simply don’t know.

7) They never try to fix their partners

Smart women know better than to expect that they can (and should) change their partners.

They might see someone who looks “perfect” in every way except for one major deal breaker (like being a cheater) then the smart woman will simply pass instead of settling for that guy and going “I can fix him if I love him enough.”

Such flaws don’t often come alone, after all—there are other flaws hiding and waiting to be uncovered.

And most of all, it’s simply utterly vain for them to assume that they can indeed change another human being…or that they are entitled to just dictate how someone else should act and behave.

8) They never get bossy (or at least they try)

Most smart women can see problems even before they arise and find solutions quickly, too. Because of this, they’re usually the leaders and managers at work.

And sometimes, it’s hard for them to switch off the “boss” button.

But smart women are aware of their tendencies. And so they’d try with all their might not to be pushy and demanding to their partners.

Even if they might not always succeed, they do manage to calm themselves down and become the kind and compassionate partner instead of the controlling one.

9) They never just agree to everything their partner says

Smart women speak up. They have a mind and a will of their own, and don’t just blindly agree to their partners’ whims and opinions.

This has led to smart women being labeled as “difficult” or even “rebellious” by men upset that they can’t control her.

And while you might think such sentiments are old-fashioned and certainly no longer acceptable in this day and age, you’ll be surprised at how many people still believe that women should just stay quiet especially on important topics.

Smart women choose their partners properly. They don’t date anyone who tries to control them or shut them down for being too “difficult.”

They instead date men who are capable of listening to them and treating them as equals.

10) They never air their dirty laundry

A smart woman knows that even though there are times when they might hate their partner, that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re done for. Most of the time, reconciliation happens—especially because they’re both equipped with relationship skills.

They also respect their partner’s rights as a person—including their right to privacy.

For these reasons, they know better than to rant about it on social media or to whine about their partner’s “flaws” to their friends.

By airing their dirty laundry, not only do they disrespect their partner, they’re also disrespecting their relationship… and outing themselves as untrustworthy.

And that’s the crux of it. Relationships are built on trust, and it’s hard to trust someone who is willing to air secrets and private arguments.

11) They’d never play with fire

Smart women are attractive all by themselves, and on top of that, men have this strange compulsion to pursue women who are already taken.

Suffice to say that smart women have plenty of men wanting to pursue them. But all the suitors in the world won’t sway them because smart women know how to commit.

They won’t care if they have the world’s handsomest guy trying to win their affection. They will say no and tell him “I’m already in a relationship.”

Smart women are confident and have integrity, so they simply aren’t swayed by the sweetest compliments men can throw at them.

And they’re aware that playing with fire can, well… burn them. So no matter how tempting they would rather stay faithful to their partners.

12) They never stay too long in a relationship if it’s run its course

It’s tempting to keep holding on to relationships as they start to slowly fall apart. We’ve put in so much time and effort building it up that it seems like it’s a waste to simply let it go.

And while it’s always best to try to fix broken relationships, there comes a point when it’s clearly unfixable.

Smart women know when they’ve reached that point and, from then on, would work on leaving the relationship as gracefully as they could instead of trying “one more time”.

There’s no point in staying with a sinking ship, and they’ll only be wasting their time if they try salvaging something that’s beyond saving.

Last words

What makes smart women who they are, in the end, is not some innate talent to keep their emotions in check. But on the contrary—it’s no one thing at once.

They try to make an effort to be rational, and on top of that, they try to learn from their mistakes as well as the mistakes of others.

And so if you want to be a little smarter in life, try to follow this list of the things you should never ever do while you’re in a relationship.

Pearl Nash

Pearl Nash has years of experience writing relationship articles for single females looking for love. After being single for years with no hope of meeting Mr. Right, she finally managed to get married to the love of her life. Now that she’s settled down and happier than she’s ever been in her life, she's passionate about sharing all the wisdom she's learned over the journey. Pearl is also an accredited astrologer and publishes Hack Spirit's daily horoscope.

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