Louise Jackson
Let’s face it, we’re all complex. It’s pretty much a part of being human.
But some people seem to have even more complex personalities than others.
They have a multifaceted depth that isn’t always the easiest personality to navigate, but it is one of the richest.
And that’s why having a complex character is both a blessing and a challenge.
1) You are a deep thinker but that can lead to more worry
At the end of the day, the mind is a tool. Albeit an exceptionally complicated and advanced one.
Complex personalities have complex brains that think on many levels.
Being a deep thinker can make you wonderfully thoughtful, sensitive, and very clued up.
So far so good.
But all that thinking can also lead to worry when it turns into overthinking.
Especially if that overthinking is rumination (aka repetitive or negative), which has been linked to anxiety and depression.
If only a deep mind came with an off switch.
2) Your active mind is good at problem-solving but it can be hard to switch off
Whilst we’re on the topic of the incredible thinking power of complex personalities…
Now would be a good time to highlight the gifts of critical and analytical thinking.
Because yet again, the more you think, the more opportunity to put that to good use.
Complex people are often really good at observing their own thought processes. They can study arguments, analyze the evidence, and make reasoned decisions.
You are detail-orientated so you notice the smallest things. You pay attention and you’re tuned in.
You can then put all these skills to use in order to problem solve and find solutions to problems.
It only gets annoying if someone is looking for a simple answer. Simple answers probably ‘aint your style.
When you see all sides to things, it can be hard to switch that off.
Your mind can be constantly busy looking for answers, explanations, pitfalls, or problems.
Which has the potential to get exhausting.
Mind-calming techniques like meditation and breathwork can be helpful to quiet your chattering brain to give yourself a break.
3) You feel a wide spectrum of emotions
I was actually having this conversation with my boyfriend just the other night:
And that’s how feeling a wide spectrum of emotions isn’t always fun or easy, but it makes life feel fuller somehow.
As strange as it might sound, I genuinely value so-called “bad” emotions like sadness or pain. (As long as we don’t get lost in them.)
Why?
Because there is an undeniable richness to them.
I compare it to the seasons.
At first the idea of endless summer sounds appealing. It’s undeniably easier.
But even the harshness of winter provides a welcome contrast that can still feel inviting or almost cozy. There is depth to it.
The same goes for our emotions.
Have you ever noticed that a good old cry can be weirdly comforting?
There’s no doubt that being very sensitive to the wide range of emotions we experience can be a blessing and a curse.
Yet, I don’t know about you, but it’s something I wouldn’t want to give up!
4) You spend a lot of time reflecting but can get lost inside yourself
I just mentioned above that the key to experiencing so-called “negative emotions” in a healthy way is not to get lost in them.
And that can be more challenging for complex personalities.
Because they have a tendency to live within the internal maze they create for themselves.
Complex personalities are often introverted. That simply means they focus their energy and attention more inwards than outward.
They may feel the need to spend a lot of time alone recharging. They enjoy being alone with their thoughts and feelings.
In many ways, they live in their own little worlds, rather than react to external stimuli in the same way extroverts do.
This in itself isn’t a problem, despite the fact the world is still built more for extroverts than it is for introverts.
But too much time spent inhabiting this private internal world isn’t always good for our mental health.
It can leave you feeling cut off from those around you, or society in general.
5) You are unique and gifted, but may not always feel like you fit in
Complex personalities think differently from most people.
Whilst that can be a real blessing, it also means you are distinctive. And distinctive stands out, for good and for bad.
That means fitting in can feel trickier for complex people.
A high level of intelligence, creativity, and independence means you won’t always connect with everybody.
Think of it this way:
A lot of the general population is on a different wavelength, and you find it difficult to tune in to one another.
So despite your gifts, talents, and abilities, you can feel very misunderstood.
There may be fewer people in your life who you feel genuinely seen and heard around.
At times that may mean you feel lonely, or like nobody really gets you.
6) You excel in meaningful discussions but can struggle with small task
Complex personalities operate on many levels. But they can find it more challenging to inhabit the surface layer.
They prefer to dive below to greater depths.
Small talk is very much surface conversation. Whilst being a widely used social politeness, it usually lacks any real substance.
And so complex personalities can struggle with it.
Instead, they much prefer to get into deep and meaningfuls, chat about complex topics, or discuss world views and abstract ideas.
This capacity for deep conversation is what makes them so interesting.
But it’s also the reason why some people can label complex people as intense or “too much”. Not everyone gets the same kick out of it,.
7) You are good at focusing your attention, but occasionally to an obsessive level
Complex people can be very passionate people.
When they find something interesting, they can become absorbed by it.
That might be a particular hobby or activity. It could be a certain topic.
But when their mind is engaged, they can become lost in the task at hand.
This is the “flow” state that experts speak of.
Popularized by positive psychologists Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and Jeanne Nakamura it’s simply being completely immersed in what you’re doing.
It’s how hours can fly by and you may not even notice.
This is a great skill to have for concentration, and getting things done. The only downside is that you might find it tricky to quit.
Perhaps you have to keep yourself in check so that your interests don’t turn into obsessions or OCDs.
8) You enjoy tackling challenges, but that means you create more struggle
Complex people aren’t just looking for the easiest ride in life.
It’s not that they seek out struggle, but they do often seek out challenges and experiences.
Perhaps because they enjoy them or maybe simply because they find life without exploration and discovery far too dull.
This inquisitive nature means they can’t stay in the beige area of life. They need to seek out the rainbow.
Sometimes that will mean creating more excitement and joy. Other times it will bring more pain and adversity.
Let’s just say that complex people certainly get plenty of opportunities to develop a tougher skin…
9) You have faced difficulties but that has built your resilience
Personal growth can come naturally to a complex personality.
It’s not always intentional, in fact, it’s unavoidable.
If you live on the surface of life it’s easier to dodge certain things that force you to reevaluate, learn and evolve.
The deeper you dig the more you will have examed yourself and the world around you.
All those life adventures, for better and for worse provide wisdom.
Even the hardships, whilst not feeling so great, mean complex personalities get the chance to face their fears and build resilience along the way.
10) You are curious and questioning, but that can make you uncertain
The natural mind of a complex personality is endlessly curious.
This interrorgating nature means they don’t take anything for granted. They want to explore, understand and keep on asking questions.
But as the saying goes ‘ignorance is bliss’. Taking things at face value can feel simpler.
Why?
I guess there is safety in certainty.
But complex personalities tend to recognize that nothing is truly certain in life, and so that it’s just a comforting illusion.
Perhaps it’s like that scene in the Matrix film where Neo is offered the red pill or the blue pill. He takes the red pill and the crazy journey begins.
Well, let’s just say a complex personality would definitely have taken the red pill!
Yet there’s no denying the blue pill would have made life easier.
Because it can offer peace of mind when you buy into things with conviction and certainty. Even if you do it delusionally.
This isn’t something that a querying complex personality is capable of. They cannot hide in ignorance, they feel compelled to seek out truth.
