13 reasons why she is not texting you like she used to (complete guide)

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Communication is a key factor to help any relationship grow. It is also normal to grow closer and drift apart at different points in your life with different people.

When someone stops texting you after you have grown close to them it can definitely be painful to deal with it.

This is usually a sign that there is something going on in their life or something is wrong with your relationship.

So, why isn’t she texting you like she used to?

There could be a plethora of reasons for this ranging from personal crises to not being interested in you anymore.

Here are some of the common reasons why she may be taking a step back from texting:

1. She Needs to Recharge Her Social Batteries

Not all of us have the same energy level throughout the day and texting can definitely drain your social battery; especially if you’re an introvert.

She may be one of those people who need to step back into her comfort zone once in a while to recharge before she can engage with people again.

Texting takes effort and if you feel like she isn’t communicating the way she used to before it might be because she wants to take the time to spend it with herself before getting back to texting you.

Now, this doesn’t mean that she is permanently drifting away. It just means she needs a little time and space once in a while.

This is normal and healthy.

In fact, you can take a great deal of confidence if this is why she is texting you less; it means that she feels secure about you and has faith that you won’t judge her if she isn’t available.

2. She Has Been Caught up in a Hectic Schedule

It is also possible that she has genuinely been dealing with a hectic schedule at work.

Focussing on a prosperous career often requires a great deal of time, dedication, and sacrifice. It is likely that she has been under a great deal of pressure due to this schedule.

It could also be the case that she found a new role or position in her company that requires her to learn more about her field. She may need to focus on her job for the time being to thrive in this role.

Deadlines can be hard to meet at a workplace and often require a dozen sleepless nights if it is an intense career.

She may be one of those people who hates being distracted when she is working on something important.

This can cause her to isolate herself and lose track of other people in her life.

As such, she may not have the time to spare for chatting with you that she had before and probably hopes that you can be understanding of her position.

3. She Is Going Through a Tough Time

It is natural for people who are going through a difficult time in their life and dealing with a personal crisis to act differently.

They may not text, call or talk like they used to because their mind is preoccupied with the situation in front of them.

The crisis could have damaged them emotionally and left them feeling empty. It is unfair to expect someone going through these kinds of tough times to be emotionally available for texting you.

Perhaps she doesn’t want to tell you about it since she doesn’t have the strength to do it right now. Alternatively, she may not wish to bother you with her difficulties.

Perhaps she requires some time to think things through in order to find a solution. In any of these cases, it is important to respect the fact that she needs time and space while also letting her know that you’re there for her if she needs you.

4. She Doesn’t Feel the Conversations With you’re Fruitful

Text conversations require effort from both parties.

Often, people find themselves texting the people they like talking to all the time until they hit the roadblock of running out of things to talk about.

It is important to know how to hold a conversation and keep it interesting for both of you.

If she feels like there isn’t much to share or talk to you about then she may be replying bluntly to your texts.

It could also be a sign that she thinks conversations with you have become less fruitful and more monotonous.

Let’s face it nobody likes dull and pointless conversations that lead nowhere.

She might believe that her time would be better spent doing something productive than spending it on a boring conversation with you.

This doesn’t necessarily imply that she is no longer interested in you but rather a wake-up sign that there is a need to spark things between the two of you.

5. She Can’t Do Something Else While Texting You

Not everyone is gifted at multitasking and it might not be possible for her to text you while she is doing anything else.

She may believe that it is best to do one thing at a time and dedicate herself to the present activity before moving on to the next.

This may be a reason why she hasn’t been texting you as she did before.

For instance, she may be spending a great deal of time with her other friends and family; she may not like texting you while she is with them.

This is probably because she wants to give her entire attention to them when she is with them and she wants to be yours completely when she is with you.

This quality is admirable to a certain degree as it shows that she treats everyone fairly without having to compromise or mix different parts of her life.

A classic sign that this is indeed the case is if she rarely ever does anything else when she spends time with you.

6. What Would an Expert Say?

While this article explores the main reasons she is not texting you like she used to, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.

With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice specific to your life and your experiences…

Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations, like why her texting behavior has changed. They’re a very popular resource for people facing this sort of challenge.

How do I know?

Well, I reached out to them a few months ago when I was going through a tough patch in my own relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

Click here to get started.

7. She Is Checking if You Care to Notice

Women definitely test to see how much their partners care about them from time to time. She may have strong feelings for you but may not be sure if you have them as well.

As such, she may take a step back and pretend to pull away to see if you care enough to notice the difference.

It could also mean that she is trying to incentivize you to put more effort into the relationship if she isn’t sure about your level of commitment.

If you have picked up on these signals it means that you’re definitely on the right track. The best thing you can do is reach out to her and let her know how you feel.

It is important that you give her the confidence and reassurance that you’re completely committed to her; not only with your words but with consistent efforts and through your actions.

8. She Has Other Priorities

It is possible that she has other things that she deems more important than texting you in her life.

She may be more excited about these prospects which may be consuming a great deal of her time.

These activities could be going on a vacation with her family or going to the movies with her friends.

It may also be the case that she has changed as a person and prefers spending time with you in person because she doesn’t like to text anymore.

She may also feel like there is a place in life that she wants to get to and that would require her to not waste precious time that she has on her hands.

If she is indeed using the time she would otherwise use to text you to better yourself it is best that you’re supportive of her new ventures.

Have you been behaving differently when you’re with her physically? This could also explain why her texting has changed.

What’s your body language like when you’re around her?

If you’re lacking confidence in yourself, then she may be less attracted to you.

That’s because women are highly tuned into the signals a man’s body is giving off…

They get an “overall impression” of a guy’s attractiveness and think of him as either “hot” or “not” based on these body language signals.

Watch this excellent free video by Kate Spring.

Kate’s a relationship expert who helped me improve my own body language around women.

In this free video, she gives you several body language techniques like this guaranteed to help you better attract women.

Here’s a link to the video again.

9. She Is Afraid That She Would Be Bothering You

Keeping in touch is critical for the progress of any relationship and keeps the link alive. She enjoys contacting you, but she doesn’t want to seem overbearing.

Perhaps she now believes that all those communications are overwhelming you. She might think she’s always bothering you.

If you’re rarely the one to initiate conversations with her then that might be one of the reasons she may be feeling this way.

She’s worried that texting you too much will cause you to drift away and lose interest in her.

This is just a sign that she values your time and just needs the reassurance that she isn’t a waste of time to you.

10. She Is Upset Because of Something You Said or Did

This is probably one of the most typical reasons for her not contacting you as much as she used to.

She is upset with you for some reason and wants you to figure it out on your own.

It could be you forgetting to do something she asked you to do or something you said last week.

She’s still waiting for you to admit it and apologize.

She refrains from telling you the issue to your face because she doesn’t want to come across as annoying by complaining about it.

If you never acknowledge you made a mistake that upset her (even if it was unintentional), it makes her look like she is whining over nothing.

She wants to draw your attention without being the first one to bring it up and is behaving differently in hopes that you will realize it in time.

11. She Is No Longer Interested in You

This is a harsh reality that you will have to face.

Her reluctance to text you openly might be a sign that she has lost interest in you or is no longer attracted to you.

If she is ignoring you all the time and has minimal contact, then possibly she isn’t into you anymore.

She could also be leaving subtle signs to hint at this fact and you may have been blind to them.

Take your mind back through every text conversation and see if the conversations were to the point and didn’t go past a few words from her end.

This is a tell-tale sign that she has lost or is losing interest in you. It is up to you to decide whether you want to win her attraction back or close the lid on this chapter.

12. She Changed Her Phone or Number

It is easy to assume what might be the reason for her not texting you or replying to your texts as much as she did before.

However, in some cases, the answer may be something innocent and as simple as her getting a new phone or changing her number.

It is definitely possible that when transferring her data and contacts to her new phone that she lost your contact.

The best thing for you to do if you have a hunch that this might be the case is to reach out to her on social media and establish contact with her there.

After all, she may also be trying to get back in touch with you but simply doesn’t know how to get your contact.

It is only a cause for concern if you see her active on social media but still hasn’t replied to your messages.

13. She Is Processing Her Feelings for You

Having feelings for someone and falling in love with them can be a beautiful journey.

However, it is a journey that one has to be prepared to experience before one can enjoy it.

It is possible that she may have caught feelings for you and those feelings in turn caught her by surprise. She may need some time alone to collect her thoughts and process these emotions.

After all, she may not have expected to grow so close to you so soon.

There is also the chance that she doesn’t know how you feel about her or is afraid that you will leave her if she opens up about her feelings.

These fears could have caused her to isolate herself from you.

If you suspect that this might be the case, then reach out to her and show that you feel the same way and that you’re willing to wait until she is ready to talk to you about it.

I mentioned coming across a game-changer in my dating life – relationship expert Kate Spring

She taught me a few powerful techniques that took me from being “friend-zoned” to “in demand”. 

From the power of body language to gaining confidence, Kate’s tapped into something most relationship experts overlook:

The biology of what attracts women.

Since learning this, I’ve managed to get into and hold down some incredible relationships. Relationships with women I could never have imagined dating in the past. 

Check out this free video by Kate

If you’re ready to level up your dating game, her unique tips and techniques will do the trick.

Can a relationship coach help you too?

If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.

I know this from personal experience…

A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

Click here to get $50 off your first session (exclusive offer for Hack Spirit readers).

Did you like my article? Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed.

Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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