7 quirky habits that indicate a high level of self-confidence

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How do you know if someone is supremely confident?

Is it in their upright posture, their chin held proudly high, and an open, dominant stance? Maybe you’ll notice it in the way they talk, directly and loudly, or in their openness to risk.

These are all good clues, and they’re normally excellent indications of confidence, but they’re not the only things you’ll notice.

There are a lot of other habits that confident people have that you might not be aware of. This is precisely because they’re the habits that you don’t usually notice because they don’t normally scream confidence. At the same time, these are things that confident people do all the time.

If you want to build your own self-confidence or better be able to identify people who really seem to believe in themselves, you can learn a lot from these seven quirky habits that indicate a high level of self-confidence.

1) Seeking out people

It doesn’t sound like there’s anything all that quirky about this habit. After all, we humans, being social creatures, like to meet and spend time with each other.

That’s what our society is all about, isn’t it?

But people who are really confident take this a step further.

They don’t just go looking for their friends when they’re done work or their colleagues at a big conference.

Instead, they’re constantly seeking out new people, strangers, to meet, talk to, and learn from.

It actually takes a whole lot of confidence to do this. 

Most of us are fairly nervous in social situations with new people. We’re not sure what they’re like and how to express ourselves, so we approach strangers cautiously and tentatively.

But people who have a high level of confidence jump right in. They go looking for these new opportunities to expand their horizons and gain new perspectives by constantly seeking out new people.

2) Exercising

I don’t know what your opinion on exercise is, but for me, it’s always been something I’ve felt I have to do.

In fact, I can’t seem to be inactive for very long at all without my body sending my signals. I feel sore and stiff and generally awful whenever I stay still for any appreciable amount of time.

Even now, as I’m typing, I’m starting to feel it.

So whenever I exercise, I feel a whole lot better. Whether it’s running, biking, or just going for a walk, I feel like my body really needs to move.

Does it make me feel more confident when I do?

I suppose so.

I certainly feel less tense, happier, more physically well, and more inclined to engage with other people.

Hmm, I guess that’s a large part of what confidence is!

If you take a close look, you’ll realize that most of the people you think of as super-confident exercise. 

They might have different reasons like managing their weight, building up an attractive physique, or keeping healthy. But exercising gives you physical power, and I think that contributes a lot to feeling confident and powerful, too.

3) Not taking things personally

Many people think that confidence is holding yourself in very high esteem and feeling like you’re better than everyone else.

But that’s not it.

Self-confidence is really having faith and trust in your own abilities, and it has little to do with comparing yourself to others

That should help to explain this quirky habit that confident people share – not taking things personally. What does that really mean?

If you do some work and it gets heavily criticized, is this an attack on you personally? Many of us might feel that way. 

We’d get down, beat ourselves up, and tell ourselves we’re no good.

But confident people will react differently.

They’ll see the criticism as being directed, quite correctly, at the work and not their person. They’ll have a much less emotional reaction to being criticized and will actually be able to take it on board so they can improve their work in the future.

But they won’t take it personally.

Another great example is being rejected romantically. 

If you go on a date with someone and they tell you they’re not into you and don’t want to see you again, how are you going to respond?

If you lack confidence, you might take this really badly and tell yourself you’re a worthless person that no one will want to be with. But if you’re confident, you might just brush this off as inevitable. There are so many people out there that, of course, you’ll run into lots who won’t appreciate you and like you for who you are.

4) Trying to fail

Uh, wait, who likes to fail on purpose?!

I know this sounds strange but lots of people with high self-confidence don’t just bounce back from failures, they actively seek them out.

I’m no weightlifter, but my friends who practically live at the gym have still told me how to build big muscles most effectively. You should lift heavier and heavier weight until you actually fail. You try to push up that bar but can’t quite lift it.

Better have a spotter helping you, of course!

If you keep lifting the same weight, your muscles will be able to lift that, but not much more. However, if you push yourself to failure, your muscle fibers actually get slightly damaged, but they heal back stronger as though they know they’ll have to lift more.

This is the approach that confident people take toward life in general.

They know that if they do the same old things all the time, they won’t grow and develop.

But if they push themselves so that they’ll definitely fail, they can learn and come back stronger the next time. That’s how they continuously improve and get ahead in life.

5) Getting uncomfortable

This habit is very much related to the previous one.

It’s not that confident people are really neurotic, and a lot makes them uncomfortable, like spiders and undercooked eggs. Ick!

No, instead, they try to make themselves uncomfortable. Not all the time, but when they feel socially or professionally uncomfortable, they know that they’re pushing their boundaries, and that’s where they will find growth.

Now, if you lack confidence, you might feel uncomfortable all the time, especially if you go to a party or meet a bunch of strangers. But his is actually the same thing.

The less confident you are, the more opportunities you will have to grow and develop so you can increase your confidence. So it’s natural that you’d be uncomfortable in a lot of situations.

Highly confident people, on the other hand, have to go out looking for ways to push themselves since they normally feel comfortable in most situations. 

6) Talking to yourself

Say what now?

If you’re thinking, “I’ve been talking to myself for years, and I’ve always worried it was a sign of madness!” then this might be music to your ears.

Just remember that there are different kinds of talking to yourself, and Golem-style “We likes it, we do. Don’t we, my precious?” isn’t the good kind.

No, I’m talking about positive self-talk.

Confident people know the power that words can hold and they use this to their advantage. They might tell themselves things like “You can do this,” or “It’s your moment to shine.”

This helps boost their confidence even more, even if it might seem weird to others.

7) Welcoming conflict

Don’t we all just want peace and happiness in our lives?

I suppose we do, and I’m not talking about violent conflict or anything like that.

What I mean is that people who are truly confident are perfectly happy to approach disagreements head-on.

While others shy away from interpersonal conflict, confident folks don’t at all. 

Instead, they’re very happy to put their ideas, opinions, and even values up against those of others.


Well, there are two main reasons.

The first is that they’d rather get things sorted out than have to live with awkwardness. So if there’s something they need to clear up or someone has a beef with them, they’re happy to figure things out rather than letting them fester.

The second reason is that they’re willing to put their ideas and opinions to the test. If they win a conflict, they feel even more confident in their ideas. If not, they can change their ideas and adopt new stances.

In other words, they welcome being proven wrong. 

Developing confidence through quirks

We’ve just seen seven quirky habits that indicate a high level of self-confidence. Does this mean these are also things that we can adopt?

I think they are.

Confidence goes around in a circle – you can do things because you’re confident and you can gain confidence from doing certain things.

So if you’re looking to build your confidence, why not start by cultivating some of these habits?

Once you start practicing them, you may just see your confidence start to grow.

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